Our Muted Recklessness (Muted Hopelessness Book 2)

by Love Belvin

  My head tossed back as I laughed my ass off. “What the fuck is that?”

  “The new Isley Brothers’ song. ‘Just Came Here to Chill.’ That’s been my shit! No V.I.P.s, baby!”

  NormaJean had me laughing all the way out to the field.

  I opened my dorm room door to leave.

  “Sorry, Tori,” Samantha apologized, wearing her favorite white robe with—I was confident—nothing beneath it as she sat on her bed. Her hair wet, curls wavier, and her face still tight from the early morning hour. “You don’t have to leave so early. He won’t be here for another hour, maybe.”

  “It’s all good,” I lied. “I wanna get in a run before class.”

  After she gave a playful sad pout, I lifted a cheek to attempt a peaceful gesture. “It’s cool. Valentine’s Day, and all.” I shrugged while walking out, closing the door behind me.

  I was not a jealous person. It was not my style. There wasn’t anything anyone had that I wanted to the point of being upset about it. But Samantha had been comfortable—or sloppy—about letting me know she and Dre were fucking. I’d come in from class or training to find him shirtless on her bed or coming out of our bathroom. She would now flat out tell me she would be spending the night in his room, unlike last semester.

  I didn’t judge her: I was not that type. But I now knew what sex felt like. Real sex. Good sex. I also knew what being horny was like now, too. Damn, I was horny. I felt it in the morning, in the middle of class, right after a workout, and even at night when dead ass tired. I missed being teased by my bully and seduced by him. This was not jealousy, though. I would never be jealous of Samantha’s happiness.

  The elevator chimed and the door opened. I wanted to roll my eyes when Andrea’s head lifted. Instead, I stepped on. What was she doing up this early? Maybe she got stuck with an eight o’clock class as a senior, which could mean she failed one in the past. Wordlessly, she pulled her book bag open and pulled out a piece of paper.

  “Here’s a copy of the receipt.” She handed it to me.

  “What’s this?”

  “The house we’re renting in Macen Beach. Ashton gave me your money on Monday. I’ve been passing out copies since I charged it to my card.”

  I didn’t give Ashton any money. I had no money to give. And the five-figure final cost made my head spin.

  What the hell?

  The elevator stopped and chimed. I was out without waiting for the door to fully open.

  “You know,” Andrea called behind me. “Hey…” I kept going out of the lobby to the doors. “I heard you went out with DJ Paulie on Saturday.”

  “It’s not your business, Andrea. Please mind yours only.”

  I could hear Andrea suck her teeth while hopping down the steps outside. “You ain’t gotta be rude. Ashton and ShawnNicole swear you’re cool and we should be nice to you, but I can’t tell. I can see why everybody hates you. I wonder how Ashton’s going to break the news about you staying with us on spring break to Aivery tonight.”

  That last sentence stopped me in my tracks, and I turned to her. “Tonight? Why would he tell her tonight?”

  “Duh! Because it’s Valentine’s Day. Couples celebrate.”

  My heart fucking ripped in half.

  “But they’re broken up.”

  “Not really. They’ve been cool again. They even hung out together last weekend. I can’t wait to see what he gets her this year.” Then her brows met. “You probably know everything he got her.”

  “Andrea,” I cried, annoyed. “I don’t know shit about what Ashton got Aivery because I don’t give a shit what he got her. That’s what happens when people mind their business; you don’t give a damn.”

  Andrea’s neck rolled, her dark braids shifting in the air. “Your rich boyfriend give a damn about you going out with DJ Paulie?”

  Rage flashed in my entire body and I bucked at the girl, leading with my fist. I didn’t hit her, had no intentions to hit her, but the desire was damn sure there. Andrea shrieked, dropping to her knees as though I had hit her. Her whole body trembled.

  When her squeezed eyes open and realized she wasn’t in pain because she hadn’t been hit, she yelled, “You’re a horrible person!”

  “And you’re a nosy, scary human.”

  Beyond raging, I whipped my body around and stormed away. My heart was bleeding and head ringing. This wasn’t right. I couldn’t let him play me…forget me.

  My eyes shot open, alarmed from my tank being pulled up my torso. Her naked auburn frame caged me, eyes stormy, facial muscles tight. She dipped her head, kissing my bare chest, descending with wet kisses. My eyes dashed to the door, noting it was closed. Brushing my palms down my face, I had to quickly decide if this was training fatigue or if Tori McNabb was in my bed fondling me.

  When she pulled my boxers down my legs and fastened her mouth to my swollen cock, I knew this was real. Delicious reality. Unable to help myself, I thrust farther into her mouth until I felt the back of her throat. Tori gagged, but remained on task. I was angry and happy at the same fucking time. How could she go so long without coming to see about me? And her talented mouth—

  Trained…

  I quickly corrected my lustful thoughts, having to remember, Tori had been violated into knowing how to give head. That sobering thought woke my ass and I reached down for her. Gathering her thick, toned body, I arranged her over my face and ate her pussy. Nabby-girl’s hips were tight at first until I used my tongue to caress her swollen clit. She tasted like fresh seawater moving over my face. I grabbed her ass cheeks to guide her movements. Tori took over not too long after, riding my face until her hips shuddered around my head.

  Her cries were an arrangement of melodies. I was damn proud she didn’t hold them back. They were so deep from her belly, my hips grinded in the empty air, I was so fucking hard. When I knew she was done, I crawled from beneath her to snatch off my tank and wipe my soaked beard. I rearranged her still trembling frame on all fours, then reached inside my nightstand draw for the vibrator.

  My mouth swept over the base of her spine, tongue tracing up toward the back of her head. I enjoyed each shiver she endured. My fingers found the opening of her dripping pussy. Tori’s lips hanging lazily from her face was fucking erotic. Needing to be inside her, I replaced my fingers with my dick, pushing in inch by inch. My hand pressed at the small of her back, silently instructing her to arch more.

  “Mmmm…” she moaned beautifully, warm pussy swallowing me in.

  I chuckled softly. “You’ve missed me, Nabby-girl.”

  Although it wasn’t posed as a question, Tori nodded, head against the mattress. Still thrusting into her with minimal effort, I reached over to release her ponytail. My fingers reached her scalp, where I clasped then plummeted into her core. Circling my hips, my head rolled back as I held hers in the air. My eyes squeezed close while I picked up pace and force, fucking my favorite girl yet. The sounds of her whimpers swelled my balls.

  Perfect…

  I grabbed the vibrator, powering it on and placing it against her clit. “Help me,” I croaked, yanking on her head. Shakily, she reached between her legs for the vibrator. “Put it on your clit. Leave room for me.”

  I used my free hand to have her widen her hips, then readjusted my knees to model Tori’s position behind her. My balls jolted, feeling the tightness of her walls this way. At first, my drives into her were slow, mildly paced as I waited with patience. When the vibrator inspired Tori’s excited thrusts onto it, my time had arrived. My hips worked harder, dick pelting into her.

  Her moans elevated steadily, hips wining fluidly. Tori’s orgasm was signaled in her quaking walls before her moans turned into full cries. That encouraged my explosion. My balls jutted and I pounded into her, blasting into her. Just as my head fell backward over my shoulders, I caught her collapsing to the mattress on one shoulder. I pelted and pelted until my body suspended, dick buried inside of her, breath fucking lost.

  When I could, I released her hip
s, causing Tori to crash on the mattress. My body tumbled in the opposite direction. In between my deep heaves, I could hear her calming whimpers.

  “How did you even get in here?”

  “Why?” she asked, sitting up with expediency. “You want me to leave?”

  Never…

  “Of course, not, Nabby-girl.” I yanked on a lock of her hair. “I’m glad you came.” I tried catching my breath. “I wanted to be your Valentine.”

  She turned my way, face hard and eyes confused. “What do you mean?”

  I scrubbed my face, trying to gather my thoughts. Bad combination with heaving. “Today’s Valentine’s Day, McNabb.”

  “I know. I heard you had plans already.”

  My hands dropped from my face. “With who.”

  Tori’s eyes fell and she turned away. “Aivery.”

  I snorted, “Why would I have plans with her today?”

  “Because you guys are cool again. Andrea said you’ll be breaking the news to her about me going to Macen Beach tonight while you two are celebrating?”

  The hell? “Celebrating what? And why would I have to break the news to her about you coming? You’ve paid like everyone else.”

  She whipped back around, bountiful tits jiggling. “I didn’t pay.”

  “I know, but—”

  “And you didn’t tell me about her family.”

  “What about her family?”

  “The guy that died.”

  Oh. “Joe? You’re mad that I didn’t tell you about that? I knew you’d been throwing shade since.”

  I fucking knew it!

  “You didn’t say.”

  “I didn’t care to say.” I rubbed my eyes, not wanting to talk about the Cooper clan after the best nut I’d had in a long while—the only nut I’d had in a long while. “This is gonna sound fucked up, but that’s their grief. Joe ain’t never fuck with me no way. So rest in peace, but it’s not my loss.”

  “Why do you say that?”

  “That nigga stayed hating on me. He was mad insecure. He knew about my father’s money and understood what I’m sitting on. So he would try to take little shots at me every chance he got. He did stupid shit like tried to crack jokes on my clothes in front of the family or ask me to lead the family in prayer before we ate. Just immature shit out of nowhere. I had to tell him a few times not to go too far or I’d fuck him up. Mr. Cooper has even spoken to dude a few times over it. So, I’m sorry about his death, but it’s not like the biggest deal to me. I only saw him a few times a year anyway.”

  Her eyes blinked. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

  “No sweat. I guess I never thought to bring it up that night or on our way home because we already had a vibe I ain’t wanna crash with talks of Aivery. I’d already been having a time getting you to see we’re done.”

  Her mouth twisted.

  “So, that’s it?” I asked. “That’s all you got for me?” Tori shrugged. “Now, tell me. How did you get in here?”

  I knew she had access to this side of campus because of being a Panther, but security didn’t call up.

  “The laundry room door was open.” Tori’s eyes were still downcast. She scratched her scalp, lifting her arm which exposed the side of her breast. Hair tangled in the air and body lazily curled over, Tori McNabb looked gloriously feminine. It made me want to take out my camera. “Stephan let me in.”

  That explained why the bedroom door was closed. Damn. I’m sure he heard shit, though.

  “So?”

  Tori’s lip released from her teeth. “So what?”

  “Can I be your Valentine today?”

  “Why am I just hearing this? When were you going to tell me?”

  “I called you two nights ago—BBM’d you, too. You never replied.”

  Her mouth twisted, eyes low again. “My phone’s dead.”

  “For two days?”

  She nodded. “I left my charger in Kentucky when I was there for my fight.”

  “Then why didn’t you get a new one?” She shrugged. “I called your room, too.”

  “I haven’t been there much. Samantha and Dre been doing it every night there. I slept in the lounger the night after my fight!”

  I tossed my head back and cracked the hell up. “Damn. They got you fucked up, huhn?”

  She nodded, blowing out air. “They’re there now, doing it!” Her arms shot into the air. “That’s why I’m out so early.”

  “I thought you were out this early on a dick run.”

  Tori rolled her eyes. “Stop it.”

  I couldn’t help but laugh. “You can stay the night here tonight if you let me be your Valentine.”

  “I don’t even know what that means.”

  I tossed a throw pillow at her. “Be here by six and I’ll show you.”

  “Hey, Ma?” I answered my phone, walking into the elevator of Ashton’s campus apartment building.

  “Tori, you there?” The voice shouting into the line sounded familiar, but not like my mother’s. “It’s Sonya.”

  “Yeah. What’s up, Aunt Sonya?”

  “Not much. I’m just here with your momma at the doctor’s.”

  Aunt Sonya…with mommy?

  This was strange.

  “What’s going on with her?”

  “She’s okay. She right here. We waiting for her to be seen now.”

  “I saw she tried to call me a couple of days ago. I lost the charger to my phone.”

  “Yeah. She called your room, too.”

  I studied the panel to see which floor I was passing. “I know. I’ve been training hard. I had a fight a few days ago.”

  “Did you win?”

  I smirked. “You know I kick ass.”

  “Hmmhmmm. I know that’s right.”

  Usually, she’d laugh at my cockiness. That coupled with how the line went quiet made it very weird for me.

  “You wanna speak to her?” she sounded muffled, and I assumed she was talking to my mother. “Hold on, Tori. Here’s your momma.”

  “Hey, Tori.”

  The elevator chimed and I stepped off, officially weirded out. She didn’t sound good.

  “Hey, Ma. You okay?”

  “Yeah. I’m good.” There was a delay, causing me to freeze in place in the middle of the hallway. “I had another episode at work, and the stupid doctor sent me to see a specialist.”

  “What kind of episode?”

  “It ain’t no big deal. I get dizzy and start seeing blurry, too. I got this tingling in my arm and leg, and I’m tired all the time. I hope they give me the energy shot. We waiting to see them now. Sonya been bringing me to these appointments ‘cause I get dizzy when driving sometimes.”

  “Shit…” I breathed. “I hope the doctor can figure out what’s wrong and give you some medicine to knock it out.”

  “I know,” she agreed. “Because I got to go back to work. These bills ain’t gone pay they selves.” Then the call went quiet again. “Aye…”

  “Yeah?” I leaned into the wall.

  “I’m sorry for the shit I said Thanksgiving. You left that money, and…it broke my heart. I promised Mommy I was gonna do right by you. I want to.” My eyes went wild. Never had my mother been sentimental with me. Ever. “I should’ve called you for Christmas and New Year, but I been embarrassed. I don’t know when you coming home again—probably won’t be till the summer—but you ain’t gotta sweat seeing no man around no more.”

  I nodded, stunned out my ass. “Okay.”

  “Oh, that’s me?” she asked. “Tori, they calling me. I’m gonna call you later, okay?”

  “Okay, Ma. Take it easy.”

  “Okay.”

  She hung up, and I pulled the Blackberry from my ear and stared at it. My mother was being a mushy human. I had no idea what that was all about, but it felt so real coming from her. Taking a deep breath, I continued down the hall to Ashton’s door. It was cracked, the slow jam music flowing out into the hall. The smell of candles had me pushing my way inside. />
  The fish tanks glowed, illuminating the fake trees and rocks inside, and the front area was lit by candles. It wouldn’t have been strange if I didn’t hear voices inside. Hesitantly, I walked down the hall until I could see an older man sitting on the sofa. It was a weird vibe, considering there were rose petals on the floor and candles along the walls. There was nothing romantic about his large frame in a black suit, white dress shirt, and scuffed shoes. His hands were folded at his belly when he noticed me.

  Breathy, feminine laughter pulled my attention to the left where, as though timed, a light-skinned, blonde bombshell turned my way. Her bob haircut flew in the air, falling into place around her beautiful face. Her lips were the perfect shade of red, eyes light brown with a dark lining, and teeth gorgeously white. There was something striking about her mouth. And her body… She and Ashton seemed to notice me at the same time. She turned completely around to face me, holding a glass of champagne. Her frame was covered in a cropped red blazer. A chain belt spelling out Chanel hung from her waist. Her tits and hips were generous in a black catsuit. And I caught the red soles of her blue pumps as she spun around.

  When I was able to snatch my eyes from the woman, I caught Ashton’s seductive wink my way and one of his hands went into his pant pocket, the other bringing a champagne glass to his mouth. Even after this morning, he still managed to make me feel butterflies in my belly.

  “Oh, my! Ashton, honey.” She started my way. “You told me so much, but left out how beautiful this chocolate goddess is!” She circled around me, checking out every angle of my frame. “This ass is perfect proportion to her breasts—and this fucking rack.” She tossed him a filthy glance. “I’m sure you have fun with those. The wet banana split, maybe?” She licked her lips.

  My mouth dropped. I knew what that was. We’d done it in New York. Ashton came all over my face and chest and watched it drip from me until he caught his breath. It was hella weird and a damn turn-on. But why would this woman…?

  “She loved it. Tori.” Ashton began my way, wearing a smile filled with pride. If I didn’t trust him so much, I’d be weirded out. “This is my friend, the highly acclaimed NormaJean.” He was at my side, heavy hand at the top of my ass. “NormaJean, introducing to you the only Panther lady of boxing and the undisputed middleweight champion in her respective categories, Tori McNabb.”