Fake Love (For Now)

by Penny Wylder

  “Zero.”

  Erin smirks and pulls the tank top she’s wearing over her head and drops it on the ground. No bra. And there goes any chance that I had of keeping my dick in check. I’m already hard, and the way she’s looking at my pants, she knows it too.

  She turns around and strips her pants off, showing me an absolutely gorgeous view of her bare ass before sauntering to the river. “You’re going to be the death of me,” I mutter under my breath, and I hear her laugh. No shame, and I fucking love it.

  I suffer through the boner of a lifetime while I build us a fire and I pitch the tent. I’m glad I made the choice to bring the bigger sleeping back and one for her, just in case. Hell, I’m excited just to sleep next to this woman. What has happened to me?

  It’s barely been a day.

  I can hear Asher’s words in my head. When love hits, it hits.

  It’s not love. It’s not. It can’t be.

  Right?

  I don’t say anything when I finish, I just strip off my clothes and join Erin where she’s swimming in the water, and the minute that my lips find hers, we get lost. We spend the afternoon swimming and kissing and chatting about nothing. I have things to ask her, but this isn’t the time. That can wait for later. Now I’m just enjoying her presence. And not worrying about what it means or what’s happening to me.

  When the sun is fading behind the mountains, we get out of the water, and I help dry her off with the towel that I brought before spreading it on the ground. She puts on some clothes but I’ll fix that soon enough.

  I put on a pair of pants before breaking out the food for the fire. A couple cans of sound and some bread. Some fruit too. And it’s good. We’re tired enough from the swimming that we don’t talk much while we’re eating. But when we finish, I pull her to me, sitting her between my legs.

  “So,” I say, “why did I have to stage a rescue for you, even if I’m beyond happy that I got to spend time with you wet and naked?”

  Erin sighs. “They’re so on board, Hudson. They want to plan a wedding. My mom wants to take me wedding dress shopping next week. And I…don’t know what to do. She was just going on like a runaway train, and I think that she was about to pick the colors of the bridesmaids’ dresses. What are they going to do when we ‘break up’? They’re going to be heartbroken, because they think that I’m so happy.”

  I shrug. “So maybe we’re one of those couples that stays engaged for a really long time? It is our wedding, so we get to call the shots, right? We just outlast your mom’s wedding fever and then once it calms down, we can break the news.”

  She turns, curling into me. Her face presses into my chest and she’s holding onto me. “You really want to do that? You want to pretend to be engaged for months or longer? I can’t do that to you, Hudson. It’ll be a drag.”

  “How exactly?” Erin looks up at me, and I smile. “I’m the one that got you into this with my idiot mouth, Erin. And I’m going to be with you for as long as it takes to get you out of it. Besides, it’s not like I have much of a life to ruin, if I’m being honest. If you weren’t here, it’s likely that I’d still be in this exact spot. But I’d be watching the stars alone.”

  Above us, the first of those stars are just sparking into existence.

  Erin is still looking up at me. I’m not sure if us pretending to be engaged includes anything physical, but I lower my head and kiss her. She gasps softly, mouth opening under mine. There’s no resistance or hesitation in her body, but I’m not going to assume anything, even with our single tent only feet away.

  “Do you want more?”

  “Yes.” She breathes the word before the question is even fully out of my mouth. So I kiss her again.

  Harder.

  11

  Erin

  Hudson’s lips are hard on mine. Demanding in a way that I completely love. I know what follows this, and after hours of teasing kisses and glimpsing his body through the water, I want him.

  Even if I’m still confused about what we’re doing and the whole situation with my parents. This one night isn’t going to make a difference, and my mind is exhausted from going over and over all the different possibilities. I feel like my mind hasn’t stopped spinning until this moment when his lips meet mine.

  “Yes,” I breathe again.

  Hudson shifts, laying me out on the towel that we’re sitting on. He moves like a man with a plan, and after what he’s shown me already, I’m going to let him and do what he wants with me. Thank fuck we’re out in the middle of the woods where no one will be able to hear me scream, because that is going to happen.

  I already know.

  Fingers curl under the soft waistband of my pants and pull them away. He moves quickly, stripping my panties off, and I hear the soft fabric of the tent rustle where he puts my clothes.

  Even when I’m not remotely thinking about it, he’s being considerate and not letting my clothes get dirty. But I don’t have time to dwell on any kind of sweetness. Hudson skips right to the spice, lowering himself between my thighs.

  His tongue on my skin is almost warmer than the fire beside me, licking down the center of my stomach. He pauses and teases my belly button and the lines of my hips, skipping down to my thighs and circling where I want him most without giving me the true satisfaction.

  “Hudson,” I say, his whole name a moan in my mouth.

  “Yes?”

  I arch my hips up into his mouth. “You’re teasing me.”

  He laughs into my thigh. “Yes, I am.”

  “Cruel.”

  “Genius,” he counters. “The longer I tease, the harder I get to make you come.”

  I make a face. “But the faster you make me come, the more times I might be able to.”

  His face lifts into the firelight, eyes dancing with mischief. “Are you negotiating your orgasms?”

  “No, I’m begging you to put your mouth on me.”

  “Mmm.” He touches his lips to my inner thigh. So, so close to where I want him. “A woman who knows what she wants. How can I refuse?”

  Hudson licks into me like a man starving. There isn’t a slow build up or gentle touches like the first time he did this. This is all heat and fire and pure fucking sex. He doesn’t have to explore me nearly as much to know how to make me squirm, and his tongue somehow, impossibly, finds that place on my clit that feels so much better than everywhere else and focuses on it.

  Swirling, licking, sucking. Every pull of his mouth makes it harder to breathe.

  I can’t believe that I lived this long without experiencing this. But at the same time, I’m kind of glad that it happened this way. Because there’s no one I can imagine introducing me to a tongue in my pussy better than him.

  Hudson’s hands scoop under my ass, lifting me higher into his embrace and seals his mouth over me entirely. Long, deep, suction that’s driving me fucking crazy. He has me on the edge, and I want to live here because it’s so fucking delicious.

  This can’t get any better, this honey-drenched sunshine that he’s spilling into my veins.

  And then it gets better.

  He releases me with one hand, slipping one finger, and then two, directly into my pussy and curling them back. They glide inside me until my hips suddenly jerk in shock and a burst of inside pleasure that I’ve never felt before.

  Hudson groans, swirling his tongue faster around my clit and using his fingers to fuck me in that exact spot. The world falls open like an earthquake—I’m exposed to the core of everything, pleasure seizing me and shaking me until I’m not even sure who I am anymore.

  There’s so much fucking pleasure that I can’t even release the screams that are building in my chest. I’m taut and stretched, arched and balanced, hovering in the precious burst of light before I collapse through the pleasure and come back to earth.

  I heave in a breath and stare at Hudson, who’s watching me with dark, lust-filled eyes. His mouth shines in the firelight. Shines with me. That alone is enough to turn me on a
gain.

  “I am very, very glad that you asked me to have a drink,” I tell him, voice rough and strained.

  “Me too.”

  Hudson stands and leans down to lift me off the ground. I don’t stop him as he carries me into the tent and lays me down. We both know what’s about to happen, and there’s no reason to say anything. All we do is kiss. Darker, deeper kisses than the ones that we shared this afternoon.

  Just like earlier today, when Hudson’s hands are on me, all my anxiety that tends to grab me and hold me captive falls away. Nothing about my future or my parents matters—all I can feel is him. And that is incredible.

  I’ve never had that. Ever. No matter what I’m doing or thinking, there’s always something else that I’m thinking about. I don’t stop moving, always going toward the next thing, always worrying about the next step in the plan.

  Not tonight. Tonight I’m just going to let Hudson love me.

  Love me.

  He rolls a condom on, and we both groan when he presses into my pussy. He’s so fucking big and I’m aching from being used by him so much. And I don’t want to stop. I don’t ever want to fucking stop.

  My voice finally makes itself heard, falling out of me in gasps as he pushes all the way in. He settles inside me, and I savor that feeling of complete fullness. Curling my legs up, I wrap my legs all the way around him so that I feel him even deeper.

  Having Hudson’s cock so deep feels like a brand. Like it’s life-altering and I can never go back. And when he starts to move. To fuck. Slamming into me so hard that I can’t breathe, my mind spins full of possibilities.

  What would it be like to always have this? Impossible chemistry and pleasure coupled with calming influence? What would it be like to really be engaged to Hudson and know that this would never end, and we’d have forever?

  And why is that what I’m thinking about right now?

  But now that I’ve had the thought, I can’t stop it. I’ve never connected with anyone like this before, and obviously I’ve never had sex like this before. Even as I think the thought, the friction of Hudson’s cock drives me higher into my second orgasm, and I let him hear it, begging for more.

  He gives it to me. I’m shaking around him, squeezing down onto his cock. Begging.

  This kind of thing doesn’t happen this fast. It can’t. It’s not actually possible. Is it?

  Don’t be silly, Erin. Love at first sight doesn’t exist.

  At the same time, the feeling echoes around in my chest over and over. What if? What if?

  I wrap myself around Hudson’s body, urging him harder and faster, until I break around him with a scream that shakes the walls of the tent and pours out into the empty night around us. He comes a second later, matching my voice with his own, and emotion hits me out of nowhere.

  What the fuck am I doing? Did I stumble into something I desperately needed without knowing it? I already feel myself getting pulled in too far and too deep. What happens when we have to break up and I’m the one who’s going to be heartbroken?

  The kiss that Hudson presses to my lips erases my fear, just like I knew it would, and I push everything aside. I let him wrap me up in his arms, and I let myself fade into luxurious, perfect, sleep.

  12

  Hudson

  The light of morning seeps through the walls of the tent, and I am in so much trouble.

  When Leo fell in love with Diana, it seemed fast. Impossibly fast. But I shrugged it off because when you know, you know, and they seemed perfect for each other.

  Then Asher married Rose, and even though it wasn’t for a good reason, it stuck. And I kept smiling because they were my friends, and when people you love get that lucky, you don’t ask questions.

  But there’s no way that lightning strikes three times like this.

  Unless it has.

  Because right now I feel like my life is unravelling and being put together all at the same time. Erin is lying across my chest, breathing deeply, still asleep. And waking up with her like this fills me with a certainty and comfort that I’ve never had before.

  For the first time in a long time, I’m not questioning where I am or what I’m doing. I’m not worried about everything that’s changing or how I fit into this new world that I’m not used to, because Erin—making sure she feels safe and protected—gives me a focus that I’ve been missing.

  I knew that I was lonely. But I hadn’t realized exactly how lonely until I said it out loud to her. And Asher yesterday, with his laughing and telling me that love hits hard. I’m starting to think that he might be right. And frankly, that’s terrifying.

  There’s way too much attachment to this woman for it to even be real. But I don’t care. Especially when her body is stretched across mine, perfect and sated. I stroke my hand over her hair, feeling the silk of it between my fingers.

  Fucking hell.

  A lightning bolt rips through my chest and I have a moment of clarity like I’ve never experienced before.

  I want this engagement to stay real. I want to help her achieve all of her dreams of becoming a vet and then bring her home every night and fuck her until she screams my name. I want to make her laugh and smile so that all the shadows leave her eyes, and pull her with me on these little camping trips so that I can spread her out under the stars.

  All this time I’ve been struggling with what I needed and where I wanted to be. I’ve felt lost, and I didn’t know what my soul needed, but now I know that it needs her.

  Erin stirs on my chest, and as she moves, there’s an ache inside me. A sudden conviction that I don’t know how to voice. So when she looks up at me, sleep still clinging to her, I don’t say anything. I just roll over her and kiss her as hard as I dare.

  The need to imprint myself on her is roaring inside me. I still have some time—I can convince her to stay. To be mine. Because there’s no part of me that believes that she doesn’t feel this too. With both Asher and Leo, I was skeptical. Now I’m a believer.

  At the same time, I know that it’s not that simple. She has a life and I have one too. No matter the chemistry and connection, there are things that will make this hard.

  I’m still going to try.

  We whisper good morning, and she slips out of the tent for a moment. I catch sight of her washing in the river before she comes back and puts on her clothes. There’s so much that I want to say to her, but at the same time it feels perfect between us, and we share smiles instead of words.

  Neither of us wants to break the bubble that’s surrounding us, so we don’t. The entire time we break down the camp, and then longer as we walk back to the property hand in hand. We take our time, the sun well up in the sky by the time we’re approaching the group of people spread out through the green space for an outdoor lunch.

  “Thank you for taking me out there,” Erin says softly.

  I grin down at her. “For taking you out there? Or for taking you out there.”

  “Both,” she says with her own smirk.

  Up ahead, I see Erin’s parents talking to Diana, who waves to me quickly. She’s a bubbly woman, always full of joy and snark. Erin will love her.

  But as we get closer, my heart drops into my stomach. First, I see the confused look on Diana’s face. And then I hear her speak. “What? That’s crazy. Of course Hudson isn’t engaged. I’ve barely seen Hudson with a woman, let alone anyone he’d be serious enough to marry.”

  She looks at me then, and her gaze drops to where my hand is linked to Erin’s, and she pauses. What the fuck happened? Asher didn’t tell her that this was going on? There has to be a mistake, because Diana would never do something to hurt anyone. Especially something like this.

  But now Mr. and Mrs. O’Neill are looking at the two of us and our joined hands. Hands that are now locked together so tightly because we’re both squeezing like hell.

  “Erin?” her mother asks. “What’s going on?”

  Mr. O’Neill looks wary as he glances back and forth between the two of us.


  Erin is pale, and she looks up at me. I try to tell her with my eyes that I’m here for her. That I’ll support whatever decision she makes. That I want her.

  Fuck, why didn’t I tell her everything this morning? I can’t say it now. Not when everything is on the verge of cracking apart.

  Slowly, Erin pulls her hand from mine, and I feel myself breaking. I can’t protect her right now, and that fucking kills me.

  “It’s a lie,” she says quietly, looking at the ground. “It’s all a lie.”

  “What’s a lie?” her father asks.

  Erin clears her throat. “The fact that I was visiting Blue Mountain. I never was. I was working at an emergency vet clinic even though you didn’t want me to. I told you I was coming here so you wouldn’t think I was working too much. And being with Hudson is a lie, too. We slept together because I wanted just once to feel something other than anxiety and regret. He said what he said to save me the embarrassment, it’s all a fucking lie.”

  Her words ring out across the property and everyone around us goes silent.

  “I’m sorry that I lied,” she says, now looking directly at her parents and nowhere near me. Her voice is filled with emotion. “I shouldn’t have. I’m sorry that I ruined your anniversary with all this and that you don’t get to plan a real wedding. I’m sorry that I disappointed you, and I’m just…sorry. I’ve gotta go.”

  She breaks into a jog toward the front of the property where the cars are, and I go to follow her, only to be held back by Asher. “Let her go.”

  I glare at him. “Are you fucking serious? This is your fault. Take your hands off me.” My voice is a growl that’s deadly.

  “Let her go,” Asher says again, calmly. Erin’s parents are already hurrying after her. But I need to be there. I can’t just let her leave.

  “Diana and Rose ended up staying in the city last night, I didn’t have the chance to tell them. I’m sorry. But you need to let her go. Let her breathe and then try again.”