Between Now and Goodbye

by Hannah Harvey

  'I messed up. You were right, we shouldn't have come here. I knew you were right, that's why I lied and said that we'd moved the plans to Xavier's house. I just...' She's crying harder and doesn't talk again for a couple of minutes, I wait. 'You're always right, and I'm so stupid. I messed up. I've messed everything up. I don't know what to do. I really don't know...oh my goodness.' Her voice goes shrill, scared and the line disconnects. I press my foot down harder and go as quickly as I can to the office.

  I see the problem as soon as I turn into the street, and my heart stops on the spot. In front of me is her dad's office building, glowing orange and red and yellow against the dark sky. Smoke spilling from the blown out windows, and blacking out a chunk of the stars. I scan the outside of the building and I spot Julie. She's across the street, huddled on the ground and crying hard.

  I grab my phone and dial 911 as I race towards her. I ask for the fire department, and they ask if anyone is hurt and I don't know. I just don't know, so they said they'll send an ambulance. I hardly take any of it in because I've reached Julie. I'm bending at her side and bringing her into my arms.

  'It's ok, I'm here.' I hold her tightly, then pull back and check her over. She doesn't seem hurt, she looks tired, but that's all. Her face is stained with tears, but she's not struggling to breathe, and I don't see any burns.

  I let out a long sigh of relief and hug her again. She clings to me and cries harder.

  'I messed up. I'm so stupid, I messed up so badly.'

  'Julie you need to tell me what happened here.' I keep one arm around her while I use my other hand to send a message to her dad. She won't thank me, she'll probably hate me, but he needs to know, he needs to be here.

  'We were just hanging out, a group of us in my dad's office. Then Carly said she was cold, and we thought we'd just go down to the beach and have a bonfire, let off some fireworks, but we couldn't get the bonfire lit because it was too windy. So we came back here, and we just...it was stupid ok. But we decided to light a fire in a couple of trash cans. I thought...we all thought we'd be able to contain it. But...the fires got big and we were dancing and setting the fireworks off out of the window...'

  'Julie.'

  'I know it was stupid, please don't lecture me. I was dancing and I knocked one of the trash cans over, and the fire started spreading and people panicked, and they dropped the firework they were about to set off and it went off inside. I thought...we all thought we'd be able to contain it. But...the fires got bigger and it started spreading further, and all the desks and chairs and blinds started burning. They panicked and left, and I got out, but the place was just...it kept burning and I couldn't move. I didn't know what to do, so I just kept watching for ages, so scared, and then it seemed like the whole building was on fire, so I called you. Then, while I was on the phone to you, something exploded inside. I think it must have been the cases of alcohol that my dad's clients bring in sometimes, he keeps them at the office, never really drinks them, so they just collect up. The windows started smashing and everything kept burning. I messed up so big. I'm so...my dad will kill me.'

  'He won't.' I say as I read his message. He's on his way. 'Did you call the fire department before you called me? Or after?' I ask.

  'N...no.' She holds onto me like a drowning girl would cling to a life raft. 'I'm sorry. It was stupid, I was stupid, but...if I'd called them then my dad would know it was me, and I...I didn't want him to know.'

  'Julie.' I exclaim loudly, 'You should have called them, what was your plan? Let the place burn to the ground? Is that why you waited so long to call me?'

  'I...I just thought if the building was gone that...' She shakes her head, looking so helpless that I can't keep pushing her. I sigh and pull her gently to her feet.

  'Come on.'

  'Where?' She sniffs back her tears.

  'You can sit in my car?'

  'Are we leaving?' She asks hopefully.

  'Not yet.'

  'Why not?' Her eyes widen, she stops moving and clings to my arm. 'We should go, we should leave, now.'

  'Are you sure that everyone got out?'

  'Yes.' She nods, 'They all left as soon as the fire started spreading. Can we go now, please?'

  'Not yet, we need to wait for the fire department and... and your dad.' I look to her, her fear is instantly wiped away and replaced by anger. She shakes out of my grip and takes a few paces backwards.

  'You contacted my father?' She yells, her head snapping around, as if she expects her dad to pop out from behind a parked car or something.

  'I had to.'

  'Why? Charles why would you bring him here?' She shrieks, her fists landing against my chest. 'Why?'

  'Because,' I grab her hands and hold them still, 'his building is on fire Julie. He needed to know and he deserves to know what happened here tonight.'

  'I need to leave. I have to go, now. Take me home.' She screams.

  'I can't.' I say firmly. I can here sirens now, blaring into the quiet night and causing Julie to stop struggling to get away. She freezes and stares towards the direction the sirens are coming from.

  'He can't know I was here.'

  'Julie he already knows.' I reply. 'I told him I was picking you up here and that there was a fire.'

  'Great.' She glares at me, 'So what am I supposed to do now?'

  'Tell him the truth. Apologize to him, trust me Julie it would have been so much worse if you'd kept quiet and he'd found out later that you were involved. You made a mistake, own up to it and apologize.'

  'He'll never forgive me. He didn't ever need to find out.'

  'Julie the building is on fire, they'll be an investigation and they'll know that it wasn't an accident...'

  'It was an accident.'

  'I know,' I sigh and soften my voice, 'that's not what I meant. I only meant that they'll know that a fire was started in the trash cans. They would have found out.'

  'Not that it was me.'

  'Julie, how did you get into the building tonight?' I ask her, 'Did you break in?'

  'No, of course not.'

  'Ok, so...' I wait for her to catch on, but she doesn't seem to see what I'm getting at. 'Julie you used the code to get into the building, another one to get into your dad's secured office. They would have known that, and besides that there are security cameras. Footage that's automatically stored digitally, accessed from anywhere.'

  'But,' the truth hits her and she deflates in front of my eyes, 'Charles what am I supposed to do?' She's crying again, no more anger only fear and sadness. I want to do more for her, make this better, but there's nothing I can do except be here.

  'Tell the truth and apologize. Admit that it was a mistake.' I say leading her to the car and getting her sat down. I kneel down in front of the open door. 'He's your dad, he's not going to press charges.'

  'I'm not worried about that.' She shouts, 'But he'll hate me. I'm going to be grounded for ages.'

  'He won't hate you, and yeah, you'll be grounded. You set his office on fire.' I try to keep the exasperation out of my voice. She can't really expect to get off without any punishment. Not after this. She wouldn't be so naïve. Right?

  The fire department is here. Unloading giant hoses and attempting to get the fire under control. Five minutes later, Julie's dad arrives.

  Nine – Julie

  I expected my dad to look angry, but he doesn't. Not right away, at least. He doesn't even look at me right away, his eyes train over the building and he looks shattered. I did that to him. I ruined his building and made him look that upset, that was all me.

  I wrap my arms around myself. My dad shakes his head, disbelief and just a little anger creeping into his expression, but he's a sensible man, a reasonable man. He'll want the facts before he reacts.

  I start crying even harder, because surely if I'm visibly upset by all of this, he'll go easier on me. I choke back a sob and he looks over at me again.

  'Daddy.' My voice cracks as I look up and he just shakes his head at me.
Turning to Charles. He doesn't even want to speak to me.

  'Charles, I'm going to have to stay around here. Talk to the fire department and the police, get in contact with the insurance company and get things sorted.' He won't look at me, why won't he look at me? 'Would you be able to drive Julie home? Her mother is up and waiting for me.'

  'Yes sir, of course.' Charles nods. I wonder briefly why my dad doesn't think that Charles is involved in this. The thought lasts about two seconds, because, of course, my dad wouldn't think Charles would have been here with me tonight when the fire started. Charles is far too good for that.

  'There's an ambulance here.' My dad says vaguely, 'Is Julie hurt?' His eyes flick to me, finally some concern.

  'When I called 911 I wasn't sure what had happened, I didn't know if anyone had been hurt so I got an ambulance.'

  'You did the right thing.' My dad nods to him appreciatively. 'I'll have them check Julie over, just in case and if they give her the all clear...'

  'I'll take her home as soon as she's given the all clear, no problem sir.'

  'Have you got any idea what happened here?' He asks.

  'I think you should probably hear that from Julie, just...she's really upset and she didn't mean for this to happen.' Even now, even after I've messed up so badly, Charles is still trying to protect me.

  'Twenty one years I've been in this office.' My dad says quietly, 'I started out straight out of college and wound up owning the company.' My dad says quietly. He keeps talking to Charles but I'm led away by the paramedics and I can only watch from afar. I watch as my dad talks to Charles, puts a comforting hand on his shoulder, and even gives him a small smile. It's tired and sad, but it's still a smile, and that is when it hits me. If I'm dating Charles, my parents will always think I have a stabilizing influence in my life, and they'll relax the rules. They may even let me out of the house if I'm with him. That's when I decide, I'm not going to break up with him, because for now at least, I need him.

  I'm silent as Charles drives me home. He tries to talk to me, reassure me. I just refuse to talk to him, because I'm mad at him, but I can't let him know that if I want to keep him as my boyfriend. Still, he didn't have to tell my father that there had been a fire. The fire department would have contacted him, or the police or whoever. Instead, he shows up and immediately gets my father to come down, while I'm still there.

  I knew I should have run when my friends did. They were the smart ones, because they're all safely at him, tucked up in bed or curled up in front of the TV. While I'm driving home to face my mom, who will be asking me a barrage of questions trying to understand what happened, and then my dad, who will be angry and doll out a punishment.

  We pull up outside my house and I can see the lights on downstairs. Great, my mom really has waited for me to get home. I had hoped she'd be too tired and decide to go back to bed. I should have known better.

  'It'll be ok Julie.' Charles takes my hand and I don't pull away even though I want to. I need him to be on my side, because then he might convince my parents to go easy.

  'Will it?' I ask looking over at him. 'It doesn't feel that way.'

  'I'll stop by in the morning to see how you are, ok?' He looks so concerned and yet still I almost say no, but I manage to hold my tongue.

  'Sure.' I smile at him, lean over and give him a quick kiss. 'Thanks for coming to get me.'

  'No problem.' He squeezes my hand, 'I'll see you tomorrow.'

  'Yeah.' I nod and get out of the car. He, as usual, waits until I'm inside the house before he pulls away.

  I want to race up the stairs and lock myself in my room before I have to face anyone, but I can tell from the low humming of voices coming from the TV, that my mom is in the lounge, and I have to go directly past the lounge to reach the stairs. She'll see me and call me and if I don't respond, I'll end up in even more trouble.

  I'm not sure what more trouble it's even possible to get myself into, but I'm not willing to risk finding out. So I steel myself and step into the lounge, sitting down on one of the large leather armchairs.

  'Are you ok?' My mom looks me over, head to toe, checking for injuries, 'Your father said there'd been a fire and you were there.'

  'I'm fine mom, I got out of the building without getting burnt. The paramedics checked me over and gave me the all clear.' I suddenly feel tired. All the adrenaline that had coursed through me before, has slipped away and left me wanting to curl up in bed and sleep for the next three or four days.

  'What happened?' My mom sits down across the room from me.

  'Can we just wait until dad gets in? I'd really rather only go over this once.'

  'If you insist..' Mom nods but keeps her gaze on me. 'You realize this is very serious.'

  'Yeah mom, I realize.' I sigh and we drift into a silence that I couldn't be more thankful for. We don't talk, we just both focus on the screen which is tuned into a channel showing episodes of Cheers, one after another until we switch it off when my dad gets in.

  He's angry. I can tell as soon as he enters the house, and that's even before I see him. I can tell because he slams the door behind him, which is something he has never done before. It's one of his biggest pet peeves when people slam doors, and I'm constantly getting into trouble because of it. It's so unheard of that he would slam a door, that my mom physically jumps, and it's then that I think she realizes I have more to do with this fire than she first assumed.

  When my dad makes it into the lounge, his face is red, his eyes drawn together and he looks older than he did when I left the garden party earlier. I'm hit again with the thought that I did that to him. I aged him in just one night. This doesn't bode well for me.

  'What were you thinking?'

  'Daddy, I'm sorry.'

  'Sorry doesn't cut it, I want answers. What were you doing in my office at three in the morning? I thought you were asleep in your bedroom.'

  'Yeah, well I wasn't,' I fold my arms over my chest, 'it's not my fault you didn't think to check I was in bed before you went to sleep.'

  'This isn't the time to be flippant young lady.' He glares at me, properly glares and ok, maybe being defensive wasn't the best call, but the fact of the matter is, they never come into my room to say goodnight.

  'Fine,' I lower my head and try to look as chastised as possible, 'I was with some friends...'

  'What friends?'

  'Some friends from school, just...people.' I shrug. I'm not going to give their names, no way am I going to drop them into this mess. If they appear on the security cameras that's another thing, but I won't be the one who gives up who they are.

  'Right, ok so you were with your friends and you ended up in my office. How?'

  'We wanted somewhere new to hang out, just a small party, ten people or so. I kind of...I mentioned that I had the access code for your office, and that there was a great view and stuff. So we were just hanging out, we weren't drinking or anything, I don't do that.'

  'No, but there was a fire Julie. How did the fire start?' He asks. I think he knows that the fire isn't a coincidence. He knows that we didn't just happen to be there when the fire broke out. Still, I want to fabricate something, but I don't know how much Charles said to him. Why didn't I think quick enough to make something up with Charles, making it seem more like the fire just happened while we were there. I didn't though, so I hurry through what happened and then risk a look up at my father.

  There's a vein popping in his neck, which has only ever happened a few times in my memory, and it means that what's coming will be bad. Really bad. It doesn't come right away, though, because my dad is far too logical for that. He needs to properly think through my punishment.

  I end up being sent to my room to sleep, after he's yelled at me for half an hour about responsibility, and ill judgement and how disappointed he is in me.

  I curl up under the covers and hope like crazy that they won't ground me for longer than three weeks, because so far this summer is panning out to be the worst one ever.
r />   Ten – Libby

  I don't want to miss a single word that's said in this class. It's not one of our hands on practical classes, which are my favorite. So instead of having an apron on over my clothes, I'm just in a pair of shorts and a loose shirt.

  Today's lecture is on traditional Italian cooking, and it's really fascinating. Which is why I'm trying to take down as many notes as possible, and yet three times in the past ten minutes I've been distracted by my phone buzzing in the pocket of my shorts.

  My parents have my schedule, so it won't be them unless it's an emergency, and if it was an emergency they would have called the main office by now. Pippa only ever video calls or texts, so I know it's not going to be her.

  My first thought is that it's got to be Julie. When she wants to talk, she sometimes expects people to drop whatever they're doing and talk to her. I'm thinking it's probably her wanting to talk about Charles, which I of course want to talk to her about. I called her first thing before my classes, but her phone was off, which probably means she let it run out of charge again.

  She must have charged it back up now, seen the missed call and decided to return that call, even though I haven't been answering. Sometimes she doesn't take no for an answer, or silence for an answer in this case. She really can be astonishingly persistent when she wants to be. Which is made clear by the buzzing which has started in my pocket again.

  I let out a small, hopefully unheard, sigh, and slip the phone out of my pocket. If I can just get a quick message to her, let her know I'll call her just as soon as I'm out of class, then she'll stop calling me. I glance down at the screen. Charles.

  I get to my feet, knocking my chair backwards and dropping my notebook onto the floor, which causes a much louder crash than could possibly go unnoticed.