Artist's Dream

by Gerri Hill

  Cassie stood, intending to refill their cups, but Luke stopped her with a firm grip on her arm.

  “If you need to talk, I’m a good listener,” she offered.

  Cassie met her eyes and attempted to smile. “Why on earth would you volunteer for that?”

  “Because talking about past pains is the only way to heal,” Luke said gently. “And I’m guessing you’ve not talked with anyone. Maybe your friend Kim?”

  “Kim knows a lot but she doesn’t know about that. I’ve never told anyone about that. I was too ashamed. I don’t know why I told you now,” she said.

  “You can talk to me anytime, Cassie.”

  Their eyes held, and Cassie knew that Luke was being comŹpletely sincere. And it would be so easy to unburden herself, to dump it all on Luke and have her sort through it. But right now, she didn’t want to think about it anymore, much less talk about it.

  “Thanks. I’ll keep that in mind.”

  “Okay. Well, thanks for the coffee, but I need to get going. I’m meeting a new client this afternoon in Sacramento.”

  They both looked up at the same time as thunder rolled outŹside.

  “Thanks again for your help,” Cassie said. “For rescuing me and all.”

  “No problem.” Then Luke grinned. “It was my pleasure.” Cassie watched her drive away, arms wrapped securely around herself as the rain fell softly. Luke was so very different from any woman Cassie had ever met. Perhaps that was why she found herŹself attracted to her. And yes, she could admit that now that Luke was safely out of sight.

  Chapter Nine

  After unpacking the groceries from her van and the ones she had brought from Luke’s, she put on a pot of lentils to simmer, then spent the afternoon in her shop, finishing up on the beaver and another much smaller eagle. She would put off calling Kim until after dinner. There had been two voice mails from her. One from last night and one this morning. Knowing Kim, if she had even the slightest clue that Cassie had spent the night at Luke Winston’s house, she would not let it rest until Cassie relayed every detail of the evening and every word spoken between them. But Cassie wasn’t ready to share her new friendship with Kim. Kim would turn it into something it wasn’t. So Cassie swore Kim would never know that she had not spent last night in her own bed. It was just easier that way.

  And she tried to push Luke from her mind, but still, she stayed. It was her hands, Cassie thought, that drew her. She had lovely hands. Long, strong fingers. Neatly trimmed nails. Soft hands,

  although she had not actually felt them. Cassie dipped her own into the soapy water at the sink to avoid thinking of Luke Winston’s hands. Her own were nicked and callused from working with wood all day long. She applied lotion constantly, but to no avail.

  After three days of working nonstop, Cassie was finally able to get through the hours without constantly thinking of Luke Winston. It was progress. She told herself that eventually, if she were to be around her more, she would lose this infatuation she seemed to have for her, and she could concentrate on the friendŹship they had started. And that was really all she wanted.

  After five days of neatly avoiding thinking about Luke and avoiding talking to Kim for more than a few minutes at a time, she felt that she was back to normal. Her days became routine again, and she was certain that she would finish all of the pieces before the fair. She was just sanding down the beaver’s tail for the last time when she heard a noisy truck approach. She frowned. She was not expecting company. She stood and brushed the wood chips from her bare legs and went out into the sunshine.

  It was a truck she did not recognize, pulling a flat bed trailer. She did, however, recognize one of the passengers. Her breath caught instantly at the smile Luke flashed her, and she smiled in return, cursing her traitorous body as it melted under Luke’s stare.

  “I would have called but I couldn’t find your card and I was too lazy to call information,” she explained. “These are friends of mine. Jack and Craig. They live over in Guemeville.” She pointed to first one, then the other.

  “Hi.” She shook their offered hands and said to Jack, “I think we’ve met. You look familiar.”

  “Yes. I told Luke we had one of your carvings. Nothing like the eagle she’s described, though. Just a small one. A Steller’s jay,” he said.

  Cassie’s eyes widened, and she turned to Luke. “You’ve come for him?”

  “Yes. I’ve got a cashier’s check for twelve thousand. How does that sound?”

  “Twelve? Are you kidding?”

  Luke shook her head. “I told you I had a buyer.”

  They stood facing each other, and Cassie forgot about Jack and Craig. “I don’t know that I’m ready,” she said. “I mean …”

  “The longer you hold onto him, the harder it will be,” Luke said quietly.

  “You’re right, I know,” Cassie said, unable to pull her eyes from Luke. “It’s just that … this one has become kinda special, you know? He’s got his own personality.”

  Luke smiled gently and nodded. “He’ll be well taken care of, I

  promise. No strangers touching him or clirnbing on him.

  Promise.”

  Cassie looked at Jack and Craig, feeling embarrassed. “Okay then,” she said. “I guess I can’t turn down twelve thousand dolŹlars.” At least she wouldn’t have to worry about paying her bank note for awhile. Then she smiled. “I can’t believe they paid that much.”

  “It’s well worth it,” Luke assured her.

  Cassie stood by while they loaded her eagle onto the trailer. Again, she felt very much the helpless female as she watched Luke lift her end. Her eyes lighted everywhere, finally landing on the biceps of Luke’s arms as she strained to carry him. The gently ripŹpling muscles on Luke’s shoulders did nothing for her, she told herself, but still she stared. Then her eyes landed on Luke’s thighs as she stood, every indentation of muscle outlined as they walked cautiously with her eagle. She mentally shook herself, dragging her eyes away and focusing instead on Jack as he walked backward toward the trailer. But she felt nothing. She let out a heavy sigh and allowed her eyes to again settle on Luke’s lean form, watching widi envy, she told herself… not… well, certainly not with desire. Admiration. Much better. They wrapped her eagle with blankets before securing him with ropes, and she was finally able to move, offering suggestions as to where to tie the ropes.

  “You’ll need to let me know where he’ll be,” Cassie told Luke. “In case I want to drive by and look at him.”

  “Well, perhaps I’ll take you there myself,” she said. “I’m sure you can have visiting rights.”

  Cassie smiled. “You think I’m being silly.”

  “Not at all. You created him. You love him.”

  Jack and Craig were already in the truck, ready to go as they stood there facing each other. Cassie folded her arms across her chest as Luke shoved hers into her shorts.

  “How have you been?” she asked.

  “Okay. Working.”

  “I wanted to call, but … well, I didn’t want to impose. I thought…”

  “You probably didn’t want to call because you were afraid I’d take you up on your offer,” Cassie teased.

  “Not at all. But I haven’t been around that much. I’ve been in the city.”

  “That’s okay. Maybe we can get together for lunch or dinner or something,” Cassie heard herself say.

  “I’d like that.”

  Cassie nodded, not knowing what else to say. As she looked into Luke’s eyes, she thought she had been mistaken by their color. With the sun shinning on her face, her eyes weren’t dark at all. They were nearly golden and Cassie found herself again being pulled to this woman. She nearly shivered from the heat that passed through her.

  “What?” Luke asked as Cassie stared.

  “Hmm?” Cassie blinked, trying to focus, trying to clear her head.

  Luke took a step toward her and stopped, just long enough for Cassie to take a nervous step backward. She clasped he
r hands together and turned to the truck, making a show of telling the guys good-bye. Luke watched her for a moment, then walked around the truck and opened the door. Before getting in, she looked back at Cassie.

  “You’re okay, right?”

  “Yes, of course. I’m fine,” Cassie said. “Drive carefully with him.”

  “We will. Later,” Luke called, and Cassie watched them drive away with her eagle.

  Well, so much for putting Luke Winston from her mind for the

  past week. Just one look had brought back all of the feelings she

  had been trying to suppress. Heat … desire. She groaned and

  turned away. Not desire, she told herself. She wouldn’t allow those

  feelings to surface.

  “Just friends,” she murmured. “Just going to be friends.”

  Chapter Ten

  “What do you see?” Kim asked anxiously.

  Cassie stared at her painting, so different from the natural seascapes that Kim normally created. She unconsciously rubbed her chin and turned her head to one side, studying it.

  “I see the ocean. And cliffs.” She turned to Kim with a smile. “It’s like an abstract seascape,” she said.

  Kim smiled broadly. “You’re good.”

  Cassie laughed. “We took the same art classes.” She turned back to the painting. “I like it. Something new for you.”

  Kim crossed her arms and studied the painting, too. “Yes. Different. But still a seascape.”

  “There’s nothing wrong with that. You love the ocean. It would be like me not carving eagles anymore. They’re my favorite.” Then she turned back to Kim. “Think of Cezanne. He must have painted the same mountain a hundred times. It was what he saw every day from his home.”

  Kim nodded. “Mont Sainte-Victoire,” she said quietly. “You’re right, of course.”

  “But Kim, it’s good. Don’t be afraid to try different styles. When our art stops being an expression of ourselves and is done solely for commercialism—”

  “It’s a sad day for us all,” Kim finished with a smile. It was a quote they had heard many times from art professors.

  “And it keeps us fresh,” Cassie added. “If I did nothing but eagles, they would all begin to look alike. There has to be some variety.”

  “Yeah. That’s really why I did it. I couldn’t muster up my usual inspiration anymore, and I’ve wanted to try an abstract for awhile, I’ve just been afraid. I mean, what if it sucked?”

  Cassie laughed. “It doesn’t suck, Kim. It’s just different for you. Try it at the fair. Put an outrageous price on it and see what hapŹpens,” Cassie suggested.

  “It took me forever to finish. I guess I could ask more than I usually do.”

  Cassie took another look at the painting. She normally wasn’t too fond of abstract. She preferred things in their natural state, which meant a seascape should look like a seascape. But Kim had captured the colors of a sunset perfectly.

  “You may have found a new niche.”

  “You think so? Really?”

  “I really do,” Cassie assured her. “Now, let’s eat. I’m starved.”

  They settled around the table as Lisa brought out a dish from the oven. She had her favorite apron tied around her waist and looked every bit the homemaker. Cassie and Kim looked at each other across the table, waiting for Lisa’s standard announcement before each meal.

  “It’s lentil casserole, and I have no idea how it’ll taste. It doesn’t look too appetizing, if I say so myself.”

  “I’m sure it will be great,” they said in unison, as they always did. And Lisa stuck her tongue out at them, as she usually did. Lisa had a penchant for trying new recipes. Whether they turned out good or bad, she seldom tried the same thing twice.

  And actually, it was good. Cassie spread butter on the hot rolls and helped herself to seconds. She was hardly a guest in their home anymore, and she would do the dishes afterward while Lisa and Kim sat at the table and filled her in on the latest gossip. It was a routine that Cassie had come to love. After spending nearly every weekend with them after Kim had moved, they had all become accustomed to this time together. Once she had made the move, too, they continued to invite her to dinner at least once a week.

  “Oh Cassie, you’ll never believe what we heard,” Kim said. “You remember that gorgeous woman at the fair? The one that bought your eagle?” Then she laughed and shared an amused smile with Lisa. “Luke Winston is her name. You know who I’m talking about?” she asked again.

  “I know who you’re talking about.” Cassie gave her a wry glance before shoving the roll in her mouth.

  “Know why we’ve seen her around lately?”

  Cassie stopped chewing for only a second. It had been nearly two weeks since she had seen Luke, and she had spent that time trying to forget the way her body reacted when she was around her. When she reached for her glass of wine, she was pleased that her hand did not shake.

  “She’s moved out here,” Lisa said before Kim could.

  “Really?”

  It was ironic, wasn’t it? Here they were, dropping this bit of news, Kim probably hoping that she could play matchmaker now, and Cassie not only knew Luke lived here, she had spent the night at her house. Wouldn’t they be surprised?

  “Yes. Carl says she’s an architect,” Lisa said.

  “Really?” Cassie murmured again.

  “Caters strictly to the wealthy, from what I hear,” Kim added. “She’s supposedly loaded.”

  “How nice,” Cassie said. But then, she had already suspected that, judging by her home. And her casually dropping two thouŹsand dollars at the festival for her eagle. “Well, maybe you’ll become friends,” she said.

  “And just maybe …”

  “Don’t start, Kim,” Cassie said, pointing her fork at her. “If you do, I’ll be forced to call up David and ask him out.”

  “Oh, please. You no more want to go out with David than I do,” Kim complained.

  “You’re right. I don’t. And I don’t want to go out with Luke

  Winston, either,” she said.

  “Kim,” Lisa warned. “Let her be.”

  Cassie did the dishes, only half listening to their conversation behind her. She had been hoping they wouldn’t find out that Luke lived here. At least, not for awhile. But it shotildn’t matter. It wasn’t like they would see her out much. Artists tended to hang together, and she didn’t think that Luke knew anyone here. Their paths might not cross too often. At least, that’s what she told herself. Since Luke had not called her, Cassie assumed that she had changed her mind about wanting to get together. Perhaps it was for the best.

  Chapter Eleven

  She was tempting fate, she thought, as she sat at a table at the local gay bar in Guerneville that Saturday night. Kim had talked her into it, as usual. And it wasn’t like she hadn’t been out with them before. In fact, she had many times. But when she saw Luke walk in with Jack and Craig, her heart fell into her stomach and she actually felt faint. She had missed Luke, missed talking to her, but running into each other at a gay bar was not how Cassie wanted to resume their friendship. She glanced quickly away, hoping Kim and Lisa had not seen her. She ran her suddenly damp palms across her jeans, then just as quickly, ran her fingers through her hair, nervously tucking the short strands behind her ears.

  “Oh, God,” Lisa gave an exaggerated moan and rolled her eyes. “Teresa’s here.”

  “Searching out her next victim, no doubt,” Kim added.

  Cassie only half listened. Normally, she would be joining in. Teresa never failed to ask Cassie to dance, and Cassie hated having

  the encounter with her. She never said yes. She never would. Teresa frightened her. She was over six feet tall, built like a truck and rode a Harley. But right now, there was someone else here that scared her more.

  Kim stood and pulled Lisa with her. “We’re going to dance. Will you be okay?” she asked. “You know Teresa will be making the rounds.”

&
nbsp; “I’ll be fine,” Cassie said, and motioned for them to go. She looked around, trying to find Luke. Apparently they had taken a table at the opposite end of the bar. She was thankful.

  She watched Kim and Lisa as they danced close. She gave a silent laugh and smiled. They really were a perfect match and about as different as you could get. Kim’s hair Was cut very short, bleached nearly white on top where gel held it sticking straight up. Lisa’s conservative brown hair reached to her shoulders, her natuŹral curls tamed somewhat tonight. Kim was thin as a rail. Lisa, like Cassie herself, had to watch everything she ate or she ended up fighting an extra five or ten pounds before she knew it.

  Cassie’s gaze followed her friends across the dance floor, and she was lost in thought. That’s why the deep, husky voice startled her.

  “What’s a pretty girl like you doing sitting here all alone?”

  Chills ran down Cassie’s spine, and she turned her head slowly, not at all prepared for the warm welcome she found in Luke’s eyes. Her bones turned to jelly, and she found herself returning the smile as their eyes locked. Luke pulled out a chair and turned it around, her back to the table. Then she leaned her elbows on her knees and grinned mischievously.

  “You know, if you hang out at gay bars like this, people will start to talk.”

  Cassie laughed. “Kim made me tag along,” she explained.

  Luke nodded. “Me, too. I had dinner with Jack and Craig. They thought I needed a night out.”

  “Did you?”

  Luke nodded. “I’ve been busy. How about you?”

  “Working, yes. Getting ready for the County Fair.”

  Cassie pulled her eyes from Luke and focused on the woman approaching. “Oh, no,” she groaned. She reached out without thinking and wrapped her fingers tightly around Luke’s forearm, ignoring the sharp thrill that ran through her. “Stay where you are, please,” she whispered as she locked eyes with Luke.