Fractured Memory

by Jordyn Redwood

  She lifted her head up and eased herself into a sitting position. Briefly, she turned away from him. Was she hiding tears?

  “Talk to me.”

  It killed him that she wouldn’t look his way. Her body trembled and if he could have given her a dry, warm jacket he would have taken his off.

  “Julia, please. Are you hurt?”

  Finally, she looked back at him. She pulled her knees up and crossed her arms in front of them, tucking her chin into the crook of her elbow. “I’m not broken...just cold. So tired.”

  If he could have touched it, he would have torn it down—this wall that was present between them. There was something she was keeping from him. An injury? Anger at his shortcomings on keeping her safe?

  “Pulling you from the river took everything out of me,” she confessed.

  Eli glanced around. How had she done it? He didn’t see anyone that could have assisted her.

  He stood on wobbly legs and bent over to steady himself with his hands on his knees until the jellylike feeling waned. Was it just that his strength was sapped or was it complete and utter relief that Julia was alive?

  Denial forced his mind to consider only the first option.

  “I guess we’re even.” He reached forward for Julia’s hand.

  “I guess so,” she said, allowing him to pull her up. She swooned, likely from the same light-headedness he suffered. Without thinking, he reached for her and pulled her into a tight embrace.

  Realizing his error, he eased her back and held her with his hands at her shoulders. “Are you okay?”

  “I’d just like to compare our rescues. All you did was call 911. I wrestled you unconscious from a crushed car in the middle of a raging river that, I might add, was freezing cold. Oh, and gave you CPR to get you breathing again.”

  Whatever it was now, it was not the time for him to question her about his take on her emotional state. She had just disclosed that she was the one to save his life. Without her, his family would be planning his funeral. “Yes. That whole lifeguard past is an added benefit to anyone in witness protection. You know we screen for lifesaving skills.”

  Eli hoped he wouldn’t have to even the score.

  The relief in her eyes replaced the troubled shadow when she saw Jace standing across the river. “Looks like Jace did okay when I forced him to jump from the car.” Her brown eyes engaged Eli’s. “Did you know he can’t swim?”

  Surely, there was something profound he should say to her in light of her actions.

  Thank you, Julia. You saved my life—and Jace’s life. I don’t know how I would have lived without you...how I have been living without you.

  He shook the thought from his mind. Already, he’d let his feelings cloud his judgment. It was time to put everything aside and do what he was paid to do—which was keeping her alive, not vice versa.

  The voices became louder.

  “Watch out below!”

  Two heavy red bags fell over the side of the rocky face, unspooling rope until they rested at the bottom a few yards away from where Julia and Eli stood. Then a man with a blue backpack began to rappel down the side. Once his feet made contact with the ground, he turned and waved.

  Ben. He grinned at the sorry sight of them.

  “Didn’t quite stick the landing, did you?” He approached them and swatted the top of Eli’s shoulder with his gloved hand. “Good to see you’re still standing, partner.”

  Eli gave Julia a reassuring smile. “Me, too. Though both Jace and I have Julia to thank for that. Jace is across the river.”

  She huddled herself. “Where did you get all this gear?”

  Ben motioned them to sit. “This is my other life. I volunteer with alpine rescue. I called a couple of friends who live close to here to help. Let me check the two of you out. Does anything hurt?”

  Eli refused to follow his command. “Just get us out of here. Neither of us broke anything. We’re just beaten up and cold.”

  Ben swung his backpack around and opened the smallest compartment. He pulled out a package that held a wound dressing and closed the distance between he and Eli. “Let me at least take care of that cut. All I need is for you to have some excuse to not be at work for the next couple of days.”

  “Let Julia. She’s the nurse.”

  It surprised him that he said it so quickly. He glanced Julia’s way, and she looked at him with faint surprise.

  “Let her rest,” Ben insisted.

  Eli relented and allowed Ben to apply the dressing. “What’s the plan?”

  Ben waved at Jace and motioned him to sit down. “There’s a bad accident a few miles downriver that’s tying up the fire department, but since you all are in one piece and able to walk, we can work to get you out of here and then an ambulance should be available by then.”

  “Glad to have your help. Definitely want to get out of here before nightfall. We’re going to need to rethink our next steps as far as Julia is concerned.”

  Ben nodded. “There’s the litter coming down.”

  Eli looked up and saw a plastic red basket coming down the side of the rock face, relieved that Ben wasn’t requiring him to climb out. He knew he didn’t have the strength.

  Another man rappelled to the bottom and helped ease the litter to the ground.

  Ben motioned to Julia. “You’re up first. Will is waiting at the top.”

  Reluctantly, she walked to the litter. Was it the ropes that bothered her? She sat inside, and Ben pushed gently on her shoulders so she would lie down. “It won’t be the smoothest ride, but it’s the only way out of here. My guess is that you’d be too exhausted to climb up the rock face even with assistance.”

  She bit her lower lip but complied. Her fists clenched at her sides as Ben clicked the buckles to keep her in the contraption as it was raised. After Julia was secured, Ben moved to secure additional ropes to the litter to raise it up the rock face.

  It amazed Eli how quickly Ben moved. Clearly, Ben was more than the FBI computer geek Eli had considered him to be. Eli had to give him credit. Ben seemed to have considerable mountaineering skills.

  “I’ll be going up with you—making sure the litter stays steady,” Ben said to Julia.

  Eli gripped Ben’s arm. “Don’t let her fall.”

  A dogged grin swept Ben’s face. “Don’t forget, she’s my witness, too. I have just as much interest in keeping her safe as you do. Maybe I can do a better job.”

  Eli wasn’t sure if Ben was taking a dig or trying to lighten the situation with some good-natured ribbing.

  “Too soon?” Ben asked.

  Eli smiled. “A little.”

  “You’ll be next up and then we’ll work on getting Jace from across the river.”

  Ben spoke into a radio, and the basket lifted off the ground. Panic twisted Julia’s face. Eli could see in her eyes she didn’t want to be confined—particularly with a bunch of ropes. He gripped her lower leg as she began to ascend. “I promise you’re safe with Ben. I’ll see you at the top.”

  She nodded but didn’t seem convinced.

  EIGHT

  The motion of the litter lurching along the cliff face caused Julia’s stomach to roll with nausea. Before they started their drive into the mountains, they had eaten lunch, but the energy she expended to get the three of them out of the SUV had used up every last calorie. She had been starving until the wind started knocking the basket into the canyon wall.

  Ben placed a reassuring hand on her forearm. She began to shiver uncontrollably.

  How is it possible to be so cold...so tired?

  Her body begged for sleep. When would that be possible? What was the next step?

  The litter pummeled against the rock. Bits of stone showered her body. Ben removed his hand and gripped the side of the l
itter and planted his feet against the rock, which further steadied the motion. Julia nervously brushed the pebbles from her face.

  “What happened on the road?” Ben asked.

  She practiced this tactic every ER shift. Get patients to talk about anything to serve as a distraction from the emotional trauma they were experiencing. Did knowing the tactic make it any less effective?

  The litter swayed and tilted Julia’s head higher than her feet. She grabbed the sides of the basket.

  “You’re not going to fall. I promise.”

  Julia closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths.

  Just trust him. He knows what he’s doing.

  “I don’t know,” she said. “Eli couldn’t control the vehicle. Nothing he did worked. He couldn’t even turn the wheel.”

  “Like someone else was driving?”

  Another jerk. Julia tried to calm her shaking. “Yes.”

  “The SUV could have been remotely controlled.”

  Julia’s heart sank further. “How?”

  “All that’s required is a laptop. The person doesn’t even have to be close.”

  If that was true...how could she be safe...ever?

  “How can we find out for sure?” Julia asked.

  “If your car was remotely controlled by someone else, it would be one of the first known cases for the make and model of the SUV you were driving. It’s been demonstrated that vehicles can be hacked into. One well-known carmaker recently had a recall for this very thing. We can search for signals to trace, and try to search the vehicle.” Ben glanced over his shoulder and grinned. “Might be difficult with where Eli parked it. Hang on...we’re almost there.”

  Hands grabbed Julia and lifted the litter over the edge of the rock face. They set her down by an awaiting ambulance. The team released her and helped her stand up, offering her a blanket and a bottle of water. They assisted her to the ambulance gurney and she sat down—feeling better with a few small comforts. The blanket wrapped her with relief.

  Ben kneeled down next to her. His black hair plastered to the top of his forehead, but his green eyes held her with determination. “It’s amazing what you did, Julia. I never thought I’d see the three of you alive again. Thank you.”

  “For what?”

  “For sparing me from having to tell all your families that you were gone. That’s...the hardest thing anyone has to do. Something tells me you know what I’m talking about.”

  Julia bit into her lip. She wanted to be strong, but her mind reeled back to one of the many times she had sat with a family as a physician or chaplain delivered devastating news. A child—maybe five or six—hearing that she had been the only survivor of a house fire. That her father had died trying to rescue her younger siblings from the hot, all-consuming flames.

  And then Julia’s own parents when she learned of their deaths months after they had been buried. When she grasped what had happened and was physically able to visit their graves, her grandfather was the only thing that held her upright when she nearly collapsed.

  “You’re a survivor, Julia. This is nothing compared to what you’ve already been through. Will is going to wait with you. I’m going back down to help get Eli and Jace up.”

  She nodded but couldn’t speak.

  Ben turned and left. Would she, though? Be fine? Considering Ben had suggested it was probable the car was remotely controlled by someone?

  * * *

  Eli and Julia sat knee to knee—both on their own ambulance gurney—huddled in blankets and drinking water. Eli thought he’d never want anything to do with water again, but every cell in his body cried out for hydration and he found himself guzzling through three bottles.

  “Can I have that?” Eli asked Ben after spotting the water bottle he was holding.

  “I already started drinking out of it,” Ben said.

  “I don’t mind.” Eli reached his hand out.

  Ben surrendered the bottle. “Fine. You can drink it on your way to the hospital.”

  “I’m not going to the hospital,” Eli said.

  From the look on Julia’s face, he could tell she was none too pleased with him. It didn’t really matter. He had to separate his feelings for Julia, his wanting to please her, from his duty to do his job and keep her safe.

  “That’s the dumbest decision you could make,” Ben interjected, who stood near them. The haunting flashes of white and red lights the only thing that broke the settling darkness. They were still waiting for the alpine rescue team to retrieve Jace.

  “Well, you haven’t known me that long. I’m sure there will be more.”

  Julia’s searched his face. It was unsettling how she seemed to read his thoughts with a glance of her brown eyes. He forced himself to keep her gaze even though his insides squished like melted jelly. It was as if her eyes could know his every thought without him uttering a word. There hadn’t been any other woman that affected him this way.

  Finally, she spoke. “Eli, you drowned. You died. You have to go to the hospital—”

  “It doesn’t matter what you tell me. I’m not going.” He turned to Ben. “Now we need to rethink exactly where we’re going. Until we can figure out—”

  Julia stood up, the blanket dropping from her shoulders. “I’m not done talking. I’m the medical professional here, and you’re going to listen to what I have to say. You’re not out of the woods. The dirty, scummy river water that flooded your lungs could cause infection and fluid to build up, making it hard for you to breathe. You need to be monitored in a hospital setting for at least twenty-four hours.”

  Eli’s heart jumped. The way her eyes implored him, the stern directness of her words, it was more than a nurse concerned for his safety. He put his hands up and motioned her to sit back down. “I get it. I understand what you’re saying, but right now it’s not going to happen.”

  “Then we have to think of a compromise,” Ben said. “Somewhere you think Julia can be safe but you still get medical attention.”

  “The ER doctor you met... James. He lives up here—some huge cabin. Let me call him and see if we can stay with him a few days until the two of you get things figured out,” Julia suggested.

  Eli drank more water as he considered her offer.

  “And he can keep his eye on you, which will make me a much more cooperative, compliant witness.”

  Ben chuckled as if Julia’s suggestion was something impossible for her to accomplish.

  “Call him,” Eli said. Julia wandered away to borrow a cell phone.

  Eli knew he could trust only himself and wanted everyone else out of the picture. On the other hand, Julia was right. He was tired. More tired than he dreamed possible. And there was no denying the ache and slight rattle in his chest. What was he risking by not going to the hospital?

  Applause drew Eli’s attention up the road where several rescuers were pulling Jace over the edge to safety. They eased him from the litter and handed him the same cursory threadbare blanket and water to drink. Jace looked as wiped as Eli felt. The river had its fun with them and only spat them out because Julia insisted upon it. If he could go his whole life without needing another paramedic, firefighter or ropes expert, it would still be a day too soon.

  Julia walked back to the group. “He was home. He says it’s fine and they have plenty of room for all of us. They’ll be waiting with some home-cooked food to celebrate us being freed from the clutches of death.” Julia frowned at their response. “Any humor, people? We’re all alive. It’s something to celebrate. And ER people always celebrate with food. Have none of you heard about the obligatory chocolate drawer?”

  Eli stood from the gurney—the ache spreading through his chest. He coughed several times. “This is the plan, and I’m the senior agent here, so I don’t want grief from any of you. Ben, you’re going with Jace to
the hospital to get him checked out and then you’re going home for a good night’s rest.” He searched for Will, who stood just beyond the reach of the light that drifted from the inner compartment of the ambulance. “Will, you and I are going to take Ben’s car to this doctor’s house. You can take a quick nap, but then you’ll be up keeping an eye on things overnight. One night’s rest, and I’ll be good to go. We still have a job to do.”

  Eli looked at Ben, whose mouth gaped open in protest. Eli shook his head to keep Ben silent.

  The man refused to heed his warning. “Honestly, Eli, you’re in no condition to make any decisions. All three of you need to go to a hospital for evaluation—”

  “Julia’s friend can look us over. You said yourself we needed a compromise, and this is it.” Eli coughed into his hand.

  Ben crossed his arms over his chest. “You can’t physically protect her right now. I say you and Jace go to the hospital and take a few days off. I’ll take Julia to the doctor’s house with Will and we’ll keep her there until she’s rested and we develop another game plan.”

  Eli pulled Ben away from the group into the periphery just beyond the reach of the rescue lights. He didn’t want Julia to hear what he was going to say. He needed Julia to trust him, and so far he hadn’t done much to instill that trust in her. Protecting her from the threat on her life was his primary goal, and separating himself from her would only weaken his position of trust in her mind. “I don’t want an argument with you. Right now the only one I fully trust is myself—”

  “And evidently Will,” Ben said.

  “I’ve worked with him longer. This isn’t a judgment against you or the job I think you can do. After all, you rescued us. Ultimately, she’s my responsibility.”

  “Eli, you keep convincing yourself you’re being professional, but you’re not. It’s obvious this case is too personal for you and it’s affecting your judgment. This is the perfect example.”

  “Why do you say that?”

  “Because you’re physically wasted, and you still think you can perform your duties. This choice is putting her at risk.”

  “It is the best course of action to take.”