Chase Me

by Farrah Rochon

  He paused for a moment. “Made eye contact with this random woman at the club, followed her into the bathroom and had sex with her.” He shook his head. “I don’t even know her name. Never bothered to ask.” He sucked in a deep breath. “It was the absolute lowest point in my life.” The pain in his voice touched her deep down in her bones.

  “Griffin,” she whispered.

  “I knew I was doing it to get back at Jacqueline,” he continued. “I’d convinced myself that she deserved it. But stooping to her level was never the answer. I can’t tell you how much I hate that I allowed myself to become the kind of man who would do something like that.”

  Of all the things he could have admitted to doing, that was never even on the list. Granted, this was the first time they’d ever discussed something so deeply personal, but she and Griffin had hung out together with their coworkers enough times for her to know that he prided himself on being honest and upstanding. It was one of the things Indina most admired about him. Committing adultery, even though it was to get back at an adulterous spouse, didn’t jibe with what she knew about the man sitting next to her.

  “I guess it’s understandable that you would—”

  “No, it isn’t,” Griffin said. “I refuse to make excuses for what I did. It was wrong. I own up to that.”

  “Tell me the divorce came quickly after that,” Indina said.

  “It did. Once I showed her the pictures, she knew she couldn’t deny it.”

  “Did you ever tell her what you did?”

  He shook his head. “No. I did it to hurt her, but I soon recognized that she didn’t love me enough to be hurt by it.” He looked over at her. “I never told anyone what I did. Not even the friends I went out with that night. This is the first time I’ve talked about it in six years.”

  Indina had trouble swallowing past the knot in her throat. Knowing that he trusted her with something so personal, so painful, humbled her like nothing had before.

  “I’m so sorry, Griffin.” She wrapped her hands around his muscular bicep and rested her head on his shoulder.

  “Does this—” He cleared his throat. “Does this change the way you see me?”

  Indina looked up at him. If the look in his eyes didn’t tell her how much her answer meant to him, the anxiety bracketing his mouth would have.

  She shook her head. “No,” she answered softly. “Actually, that isn’t true. I’m touched that you trusted me with something so personal.”

  Indina questioned her next move before she made it. It was the one thing she’d avoided in the last eight months. But as she stared into Griffin’s eyes nothing felt more right. She captured his jaw in her palm and touched her lips to his. Griffin’s groan was audible. Indina felt his body shudder as he gently glided his lips over hers.

  She understood the significance of this moment, what it meant to finally open herself up enough to kiss him on the lips. Instead of scaring her, it made her even bolder. She opened her mouth and pulled his tongue inside. And wondered why it had taken her so long to taste his kiss.

  She reveled in the pleasure that seized her body, the unmitigated bliss that captured her senses as Griffin’s tongue tangled with hers. It had been so long since she’d allowed herself to be so thoroughly kissed. She’d missed it. This feeling of closeness, of intimacy, of trust.

  It didn’t come as a surprise that Griffin’s kiss surpassed any other she’d ever known. As with everything else, he seemed to know exactly what she craved.

  “Wait until you’re in your room to do that!”

  Indina jerked back. She looked down and saw Ezra waving at them.

  “Come on,” her brother called. “It’s time to go.”

  Indina stood, but before she could take a step further, Griffin pulled her to him and gave her another swift kiss.

  His intense gaze arrested the air in her lungs. “I could kiss you for the rest of my life,” he said before finally releasing her.

  Indina tried to wipe away the doubt that slowly swept over her as they headed back toward the shuttle buses. After they wrapped up their visit to Dzibilchaltún, they toured the ruins at Chichen-Itza. Before they left the second site, Monica announced that they were going to have a late lunch of authentic Mexican food at a restaurant in the capital city of Merida. Alex complained about spending money at a restaurant when they could eat on the cruise ship for free, but Renee quickly put an end to his protest.

  When they arrived at the restaurant, Monica instructed them to all gather on the sidewalk. She called for Gerald to join her in front of the restaurant’s entrance.

  “On behalf of my generous father-in-law, I’d like to welcome you all to the official Holmes Family Reunion Celebration. Gerald rented out the restaurant for the afternoon.” She turned to Margo. “Don’t bother fussing with him over it. He wanted to do it and would not take no for an answer.”

  They were greeted by the restaurant’s owners, an older couple who had been married so long they looked alike. The space was decorated with balloons, streamers and a banner welcoming the Holmes Family. There was even a mariachi band.

  They were all seated at a long set of tables that ran the entire length of the dining area.

  Indina’s mouth literally watered as platters of succulent dishes were laid before them. Pork wrapped in banana leaves and cooked underneath hot coals, pickled red onions, beans and rice, fresh handmade tortillas and everything you could think of for an authentic Mexican feast.

  Once they’d all eaten first and then second helpings, the tables were moved to the side and the mariachi band started up with more lively music. The children were the first to the dance floor, but they were soon followed by the elders of the family. Indina could hardly catch her breath as she watched her dad take fifteen-year-old Liliana—the only Holmes child who was not dancing—and drag her to the floor. It took only a few moments before her niece went from surly teen to cheerful and carefree.

  Indina spotted her brother sitting at one of the tables in the corner, staring at the dance floor. She walked over to where he sat and pulled a chair up next to his. She bumped his shoulder. “That should be you out there with Lily.”

  Harrison snorted. “As if she would have gone out on that dance floor with me. Not in this lifetime.”

  “So she likes her grandpa more than she likes her dad,” Indina said with a shrug. “Doesn’t surprise me one bit.”

  “Thanks a lot.”

  “Oh, come on.” Indina laughed at his incredulous tone. “She’s a teenager. She likes everyone more than she likes her dad.”

  “Except when it’s time for her to go to the mall,” Harrison said. He nudged his head to where their father and Liliana were doing some kind of two-step. “It’s good to see him having a nice time. This cruise was good for him.”

  “It was good for the entire family,” Indina said. She glanced over at her brother, debating whether or not she should broach the subject of him and Willow. It probably wasn’t the best time to talk about it, but the ship docked in New Orleans in the morning and who knew when she’d have Harrison’s ear again.

  Anticipating her brother’s reaction, Indina opted for a humorous, wise-ass approach. Maybe it would take the edge off this sensitive topic.

  With a light chuckle, she bumped her shoulder against his again, and said, “Soooo, I don’t want to get all up in your business, but your wife mentioned that your bedroom has been pretty quiet lately. You don’t need the little blue pill do you?”

  Harrison’s gaze swiftly shot to her, his eyes wide. “She said what?”

  Okay, so maybe humor wasn’t the way to go. She turned to him, and in a lower voice, said, “If I remember her words correctly, she said you haven’t touched her in months. So?” Indina prompted when he didn’t say anything.

  Lines of tension bracketed Harrison’s mouth. “I’m not having this conversation with my little sister.”

  “Oh, please.” Indina snorted. “I’m younger than you by fourteen months. And I started h
aving sex even before you did.”

  “I’m sure as hell not having that conversation with you,” Harrison said. “Especially since it happened to be with my best friend at the time.”

  Indina smiled. “Marshall was a sweetheart. I need to check in on him. I heard that he and Robert are thinking about adopting another kid.”

  “They already have. A little girl named Ashley,” Harrison said. “They asked me to be the godfather.” He looked over at her. “Are we done here?”

  “No,” Indina said, serious now. “I want to know what’s going on with you and Willow? Is this your regular little husband and wife spat, or is it something more serious?”

  “It’s nothing that you should be concerned about.”

  “Well I am concerned, especially after noticing the way Lily looked at you both earlier at the ruins.” Her brother’s eyes widened with surprise. Indina shook her head. “Really, Harrison? You don’t think your kids pay attention? They both do, and I’ll bet they both see that something isn’t right between the two of you.”

  “It’s…I don’t even know,” he said. He ran a hand down his face. “You want to know the truth? That’s it. I have no idea what’s happening with Willow. But it’s none of your business, so stay out of it.” His tone brooked no argument. “I mean it, Indina. I don’t need you sniffing around my marriage. Let me figure out whatever is going on with my own damn wife.”

  “Fine.” She put both hands up, but then clamped a hand on his forearm. “Just know that I’m here if you need to talk about anything. I love both of you, Harrison. And you know those kids mean the world to me. I don’t like to see them hurting and if they see the two of you unhappy, then they will be unhappy.” She gave his arm a light squeeze. “Promise you’ll come to me if you need me.”

  He gave her the barest nod before gesturing to the dance floor. “Can we go back to enjoying ourselves now?”

  “Do you call what you were doing before ‘enjoying’ yourself? Maybe you do need some lessons on how to loosen up.”

  “Forgive me for not being the social butterfly that your boyfriend is,” he said, pointing to where Griffin was stuck between Margo and Sienna in the conga line. Harrison chuckled. “He sure fits in with this family, doesn’t he?”

  “Yes,” Indina murmured. “He does.”

  She spent the next hour questioning exactly why she didn’t correct Harrison when he referred to Griffin as her boyfriend. At the same time, Indina ruminated on just how well Griffin did seem to fit in with the Holmeses. Her aunt Margo was undoubtedly charmed by him, and when her nephew discovered Griffin was a huge Star Wars fan—something Indina had not known either—Athens bombarded him with questions about his favorite characters.

  When the image of Griffin at a Holmes family picnic, or sitting at the huge dining table at Christmas, enjoying dinner with her family didn’t immediately rattle her, Indina knew something had fundamentally changed.

  And that’s what really rattled her.

  She’d spent the past two years convincing herself that she was okay with never being in a relationship again. Yet, she could picture all too well what it would be like to start a relationship—a real relationship—with Griffin Sims. That fear of being vulnerable, of opening herself up to the hurt and humiliation she’d experienced in the past? It didn’t seem to matter anymore. None of it was as strong as the pull to recreate moments like this with Griffin in the future.

  Indina thought back to their walk on the beach, when they’d discussed her parents’ marriage and how, for the barest second, she’d wondered if she could have that kind of love with Griffin. She knew the danger in indulging such thoughts, yet there they were, stealthily intruding, giving her a sense of hopefulness she had not allowed herself to feel in so very long.

  The fear of trusting even that small bit of hope she felt left Indina breathless. It terrified her.

  A few moments later, Monica reluctantly cut off the band’s play, announcing that they all would have to board the shuttles in the next ten minutes in order to make it back to the cruise ship before it departed. Despite the restaurant owners’ insistence that they leave everything as is, everyone pitched in to return the tables to their rightful places and pick up as much mess as possible.

  “The shuttles can only stay parked at the curb for a few minutes, so we need to be out there waiting for them,” Monica said.

  As everyone started filing out of the restaurant, Griffin sidled up next to Indina, his dark brown skin flush after all the dancing and laughing.

  “You Holmeses know how to a party,” he said.

  Indina sent him a pensive smile, still shaken by the conflicting thoughts warring in her brain. Apparently, her smile wasn’t enough to hide her emotions.

  Griffin’s brow furrowed. “Hey, are you okay?”

  “I’m fine.” She had to clear the lie from her throat before she could continue. “I’m happy you’re having such a good time with my family. Enjoy them while you can.”

  His head snapped back. A mask of hurt and confusion shrouded his face.

  “Okay, people, let’s board the shuttle,” Monica called.

  “Indina?” Griffin reached for her, but she stepped out of the way.

  “We should go,” she said as she started for the shuttle.

  She couldn’t even look him in the eye.

  The Holmes crew had taken over the left side of the small lounge aboard the cruise ship. As they relaxed on the plush sofas and chairs, sipping on a fresh round of drinks and laughing at Reid’s questionable dance moves from this afternoon’s party, Griffin quietly basked in this sense of togetherness…while he still had the chance to enjoy it.

  Indina’s words from this afternoon continued to churn in his gut.

  He’d questioned her once they arrived back on the ship, but she’d brushed it off, claiming she was just worried about Harrison and Willow and hadn’t been thinking clearly. Griffin believed that as much as he believed Reid was a potential contender for Dancing With The Stars. He knew damn well Indina meant for things to go back to the way they were once they returned to New Orleans, but there was no way Griffin could go for that. Not anymore. Not after being immersed in this big, boisterous, amazing family for the last three days.

  He wanted them in his life. Permanently.

  In the same way he wanted her in his life.

  The thought of falling back into their old hookup routine made him physically sick. How could she think that would be enough for him after the time they’d spent together this weekend?

  Why do you think she would want more?

  Indina had never been anything but straight with him. She’d never led him on, or pretended to want anything other than the arrangement they’d agreed upon eight months ago.

  That still didn’t change his feelings. Griffin could not—would not—go back to the way things were. That applied to more than just his relationship with Indina.

  Earlier, while soaking in the fun of this afternoon’s celebration at the Mexican restaurant, Griffin made the decision to finally reach out to his brother. Witnessing the way these Holmeses argued one minute then joked with each other the next, showed Griffin that this wound between him and his brother had festered for way too long. He wouldn’t allow his stubbornness to keep him away from his family any longer. He was going to extend an olive branch to Garland as soon as he returned to New Orleans. Whether or not his brother accepted it was still a question, but Griffin vowed to do his part.

  But even if he did make things right with Garland, he knew it wouldn’t curb his desire to be a part of this family. Yet, Griffin knew belonging to the Holmeses was only a small part of what was driving him.

  He wanted Indina. He’d wanted her for months. He wanted all of her, not just her body. Griffin dreaded even thinking about the conversation they must have, but it was their last night on the cruise. He refused to step foot off this ship without telling Indina where he stood.

  It was all or nothing. Either she agreed to being mor
e than just the occasional bed partner, or they broke things off completely.

  Pain pierced his chest just at the thought of his time with her coming to an end, but Griffin could no longer stomach being used as just a means of getting off. If Indina could not see that they deserved to be an actual couple, then he was done.

  Toby called Griffin over to finish a discussion they’d started with Jonathan earlier today about ideas he wanted to incorporate into the new club he was opening in New Orleans’s Warehouse District. A few minutes later, he noticed Indina rise from the chair where she’d been sitting most of the night. Her eyes connected with his. It was the first time she’d looked his way since they’d arrived in the lounge. Griffin didn’t know what to make of the despondent expression clouding her eyes. He heard her say to Monica that she was tired and turning in for the night before walking out of the lounge.

  After another twenty minutes, he couldn’t take it anymore. He made a quick excuse about turning in early and made his way to their cabin. He walked in to find it empty.

  Dammit.

  He was just about to go back out and search for her when he caught sight of Indina’s feet propped up on the balcony railing. Relief crashed into him, but it was quickly replaced with a feeling of dread. It was time they had the conversation that had been months in the making.

  Griffin walked over to the sliding glass door and pushed it further open. Indina sat with her hands folded over her stomach, her head tilted back. The slight breeze off the water blew the hair around her face. The soft crush of the waves against the ship’s hull provided an eloquent song to the portrait of serenity she presented.

  But Griffin could tell it was just a facade. The tension lines bracketing her mouth betrayed what was really going on inside her head. He knew because he’d been dealing with those same feelings since they left the restaurant in Merida.

  “We need to talk,” Griffin said.

  She didn’t move. Didn’t open her eyes. If not for the small dip in her brow Griffin would have wondered if she’d heard him at all.

  “We need to talk about what you said as we were leaving the restaurant this afternoon. I know you don’t want to discuss it. That’s why you’ve been in this sulky mood tonight, right?”