Just Breathe Series (Trilogy Box Set)

by Martha Sweeney

  My body relaxes, my eyes soften and a smile forms on my face. “So, how did you get them?”

  Joe finally lifts his gaze back to mine. “I bought them online. I hope they’re okay. I wasn’t sure if they’d be good, or fit the same with . . . .”

  My mouth connects to his, taking it with firm sweetness. “They’re perfect. Thank you,” I comment, barely taking my lips away from Joe’s.

  “Should you make sure?”

  “Make sure what?”

  “That they fit and you like them,” he bashfully explains.

  “They’ll be fine,” I state. “But, if you’d like to see a pair on, for the opportunity to rip them off, I could.”

  A genuine smile returns to Joe’s face. “I’d like to seem them on, but I’m not willing to rip them off . . . not just yet,” he replies, content with my reaction.

  I graciously put each pair on, allowing him to inspect each fit. He has me stand two feet away and directs me with his hands on my hip to turn until I’m facing him again. Joe seems pleased with what he ordered, especially once I admit that they are all very comfortable and that I like them. I tease him that I need to get some matching bras, which he’s quick to offer to buy. I refuse, saying that I hope that he’ll be ripping off a few more in the not too distant future.

  Fifty Nine

  Sunday through Tuesday, I purposefully keep focused on work, getting as much done as I can before Joe and I leave to meet up with his parents in Oregon to see the facility. Joe and I are scheduled to fly up Thursday morning, spending the entire weekend with his parents. They insist on making it both a trip for business and some added pleasure by visiting some of the local beaches and city areas.

  Tuesday afternoon, I head over to Nathaniel’s with Maggie and Sadie to check in with Nathan and Jared. Jared is doing some filming at Nathaniel’s and then more tomorrow at their apartment for Naturally Me. Nathan continues to block me from seeing anything that pertains to my dress for the premier. I try to sneak off to get a peek after hearing Maggie squeal once she sees it, but my attempts are deflected by everyone. The entire winter line is complete and stunning. Several pieces have been picked up by a retailer thanks to the connections from Jimmy, Henry and Joe.

  “Why can’t I see it?” I ask for the sixth time today. “I know it’s ready.”

  “It’s not ready,” Nathan challenges. “Not yet.”

  “You’ve got to have it done,” I accuse. “You need enough time to make alterations.”

  “I’ll have plenty of time,” Nathan replies. “Now, stop bothering me. I’m working.”

  “Jared?” I whine, hoping to get some bit of support.

  “You heard him, Kitten,” Jared chuckles.

  “Seriously?” I say in disbelief.

  “Seriously,” Jared repeats.

  Frustrated, I head back to Nathan’s office to resume work until it’s time to leave.

  After having dinner with Nathan, Jared, Maggie and Pop-Pop, Sadie and I head home. There’s still a lot to take care of before my flight to Oregon. Maggie drops Sadie and me off by ten and I’m in bed and reading a book by eleven. Maggie would have stayed, but she’s been occupied with getting the house fully decorated before Henry gets home from another business trip since the remainder of the furniture has finally been delivered. Joe and I talk for a little bit, but I claim that I’m too tired to come over. I’m not really tired — I’m fighting the urge to show my desire for him. Instead, after he and I are finished talking, I masturbate with B.O.B. and Master P who are unable to deliver the satisfaction that Joe Covelli can.

  The sound of my phone vibrating wakes me from sleep. Barely focused, my eyes do recognize that it’s Maggie calling at two thirty-nine in the morning. “Maggie,” my voice hoarsely greets.

  “Emma,” Maggie sobs.

  “What’s going on?” I question.

  The sound of her voice has me extremely concerned.

  “Emma,” she repeats sniffling. Her voice falters and I can’t make out what she’s saying.

  “Maggie, I can’t understand you. What’s wrong?” I instruct as my heart fills with worry.

  “It hurts,” she mumbles.

  “What hurts?” I check, not understanding.

  “There’s . . .” she begins, but cuts herself off with more sobs.

  “What?” I say frantically.

  “There’s . . . so much . . . blood,” she announces, gulping for air.

  “Did you fall? What happened? Where’s your staff?” I press as I get up and start getting dressed.

  “No . . .” she answers, bawling more. “No . . . .”

  “What? Tell me,” I direct.

  Maggie weeps as my brain starts to process what’s happened. “I’m on my way. Don’t move. Okay?”

  “Yeah,” she weeps.

  “I need to hang up to call for a ride, but I’ll call you right back, okay?” I check, packing a bag of clothes.

  “Ooo-kay,” she blubbers.

  “Everything is going to be okay. I love you,” I inform her and then hang up, not waiting for a response.

  I rush around the apartment grabbing things that I will need if what is happening is what I think it is. Locking the door behind Sadie and me, I call Joe. There’s no other person who can get me to Maggie quicker — not even a cab.

  With my bag over my shoulder and Sadie at my side, I sprint toward Joe’s as I dial his number — please pick up, Joe. The building staff let me in without question, recognizing me right away. By the time I enter the elevator for Joe’s building, the phone signals that it’s been answered.

  “Hello?” Joe’s voice greets groggily.

  “Joe!” I yell. Adrenaline is coursing through my veins from the full on run I just completed to reach him.

  “Emma? What’s wrong?” he presses.

  “Joe! I’m in your elevator,” I share.

  “What’s going on?” he asks.

  The elevator door dings open. Tears threaten my eyes and begin to pour when I hear the latch and lock turn.

  When our eyes meet, my arms wrap around his neck. “We need to go,” I cry.

  “Go where?” he searches.

  “We need to get to Maggie!” I share, letting go of him. “You need to get dressed and we need to get to her.”

  As Joe dresses, I start grabbing extra clothes for him to pack. By the time we’re in his car, I’ve called Jared three times and he has yet to pick up. I know Jared is a heavy sleeper, so I’m not surprised that he’s not answering.

  Getting frustrated, I switch to calling Nathan’s phone. Without success after a two attempts, I regretfully call Pop-Pop.

  “Emma, sweetheart,” Pop-Pop answers in a groggy tone.

  “I’m so sorry to call Pop-Pop, I . . . .”

  Before I can finish he cuts me off, “It’s okay darling. What’s up? You don’t sound good.”

  “I’ve been trying to get a hold of Jared,” I inform him.

  “Is everything okay? What happened?” he seeks.

  I do my best to fight back the tears and control the lump in my throat. “It’s Maggie,” my voice cracks.

  “Jared!” Pop-Pop shouts.

  I hear Pop-Pop pounding his fist on their bedroom door.

  “Jared. Wake up!”

  Silence falls for what feels like minutes.

  “Something’s happened. Emma’s on the phone.”

  There’s a rustling sound and then Jared’s voice. “What’s wrong, Kitten? Did you have the dream?” Jared asks full of concern.

  “No . . .” I whimper. “It’s Maggie.”

  There’s silence for several heart beats. “I’m on my way,” Jared announces in a stern, controlled manner.

  “Meet me there,” I instruct him.

  “Where are you?”

  “In the car with Joe,” I acquiesce.

  “Good,” he comments. “Do you know what it is?”

  I can hear the strain in his voice.

  “No . . .” I reply. “But, I’m pret
ty sure.”

  “Do you need me to stay on?” he checks.

  “No,” I object. “I told her I’d call her back.”

  “Okay . . . I love you, Kitten,” soothes Jared.

  “Love you,” I mutter.

  My brain glazes over as Joe speeds through the streets. I call Maggie, but she doesn’t answer. After two more attempts, I text her that I’m already on my way. When we arrive, I dart to the front door of her estate and vigorously pound on the door until Arnold, her butler, answers.

  “My apologies, Ms. Emma. I didn’t know we were expecting you,” he serenely states, letting us in. “I wasn’t aware until the system told me someone was at the gate . . . .”

  “Maggie called,” I blurt, heading for the stairs.

  “Is everything alright?” Arnold questions, confused by my frantic state. He follows closely.

  “I hope so,” I answer, taking the steps two at a time. “Would you please wake Ava? Maggie and I will need her assistance.” I stop right outside of Maggie’s bedroom, causing Arnold, Joe and Sadie to almost collide into me.

  “Of course, Ms. Emma. Anything else?”

  “Jared’s on his way. He should be here soon,” I inform. My hand is shaking on the door knob.

  “Yes, Ms. Emma,” Arnold agrees before leaving us.

  I look to Joe who is standing in front of me. My heart pounds and my ears ring as I try to figure out what to say while the need to rush in to help Maggie sirens in my head. “I need you . . .” my voice trails.

  “Whatever you need, just tell me.” Joe gently places his hands on my face.

  “If it is what I think it is . . . I need you to let me go in first. Don’t question anything . . . just . . . .”

  Joe nods and kisses me with panicked sweetness, not willing to let go for several seconds. We don’t say anything for a moment. Sucking in some air and courage, I enter the bedroom, closing the door behind me. Sadie whimpers as Joe restrains her from following in after.

  “Maggie?” I search, looking around the room.

  “In here,” her voice faintly calls.

  My eyes confirm the pained notion I believed to be the reason for Maggie’s call when I peer into the bathroom. My heart sinks full of sadness as I rush to her curled up body laying on the tiled floor. I do my best to be careful where I step to make sure I don’t slip.

  “Emma!” Maggie expresses with tear stained cheeks, tousled hair and a shaking body, trying to sit up.

  “I’m here,” I soothe lovingly as I move to wrap my arms around her.

  “No!” she shouts. “You’ll get blood on you!”

  “It’s okay, sweetie,” I console, comforting her.

  I sit, rocking her in my arms for a while, needing her to calm. Maggie’s hands huddle around her belly as she cries into the crook of my arm. Once I get her relaxed enough, I inform her that I’ll be right back. Cracking the bathroom door open, I call out to Joe. Within seconds, he and Sadie are inches away from me. Sadie whines to be let in, but I block the entrance with my leg.

  “Is she alright?” Joe searches.

  “She will be . . . at some point,” I suggest.

  “Is that . . . blood?” Joe’s eyes widen as he inspects my shirt.

  “Probably,” I confirm, not wanting to check and knowing most likely that it is.

  “I need Ava . . .” I begin, stopping when Ava, one of Maggie’s maids, enters the room.

  “What is it, Ms. Emma?” Ava promptly questions with uneasiness in her tone. Her mouth gapes when her gaze falls upon me after Joe shifts to the side.

  “I need some fresh clothing for Maggie, please,” I direct as calmly as I can. “And, the bed will need to be tended to.”

  “Right away, Ms. Emma.” Ava rushes to Maggie’s closet but stops at the foot of the bed. Her expression alters again slightly when the realization sets in.

  “I’m going to need you to keep Jared out of here, at least for a little while when he gets here,” I brief Joe.

  “Sure,” Joe agrees.

  Jared’s protective, very protective of Maggie and me. Beyond being protective, Jared’s mood changes. His demeanor can become very large which would not work in a case like this — Maggie’s too fragile.

  “He’ll push his way past you,” I reveal and the look on Joe’s face confirms his understanding. “You need to call Henry. Get him to come home. Maggie won’t be good until he’s here.”

  My brain scrounges for anything else it can think of.

  “And, I need my bag.”

  “Anything else?” Joe checks.

  “No . . . thank you,” I maintain.

  The next thing I know, Joe’s lips are along mine and I surprisingly don’t pull away. He unwillingly lets go of me after a few long seconds of our embrace.

  Back in the bathroom, alone with Maggie and with the door locked, I’m able to clean up most of the blood that is on the floor before Ava knocks. I let her in once Joe keeps Sadie at bay. Ava comes in and helps me finish cleaning the bathroom as I get the shower started for Maggie.

  Ava brings in my bag and the fresh clothes for Maggie I requested, placing them on the counter. “Do you still need me, Ms. Emma?” Ava checks.

  “No. Thank you,” I instruct. Just as Ava’s about to leave the room, I call to her, “Ava.”

  “Yes, Ms. Emma?” she asks while sealing Maggie’s blood-soaked pajamas in a plastic bag.

  I grab my phone and check something I found on the internet before continuing. “Do you know where Maggie keeps all of her special teas?”

  “Yes, Ms. Emma.”

  “Has she shown you how to use them?”

  “Yes.”

  “Good. I’ll need you to make her some herbal tea,” I state calmly.

  “Which ingredients, Ms. Emma?”

  My eyes focus on the website I pulled up on my phone, forgetting what I read. “Red raspberry, nettles, red clove, oat straw and alfalfa. Any combination of those she may have. Also, add some mint too, please.”

  “Yes, Ms. Emma. I’ll bring it up when it’s ready.”

  “Thank you, Ava.”

  “Should I call the family, Ms. Emma?”

  “No. Not yet. Thank you,” I confirm.

  “Yes, Ms. Emma.”

  I remove my clothes and then Maggie’s before escorting her into the shower. She’s able to stand for a few minutes, but the weakness of her body, and probably the pain in her heart, cause her to find a seat. With a sea sponge in hand, I gently wash Maggie’s entire body. Neither of us talk, but at least Maggie’s whimpers have subsided.

  “Do you think Henry will divorce me?” Maggie questions with a strange, somber tone that I’ve never heard from her before now.

  “Why would you think such a thing?” I gasp.

  “Because I lost the baby. He’ll probably hate me,” she states.

  “Henry loves you and wanted to marry you before you got pregnant. He’ll be sad like you, but he will not leave you,” I assure.

  “I hope so,” she mumbles.

  As I get Maggie out of the shower, I hear Jared banging on the door. There’s a little commotion, but Maggie doesn’t seem to notice. I get her situated with a towel for a second before throwing on a robe and head out to the bedroom.

  “Jared,” I call sternly while trying to maintain a low voice as I exit the bathroom and close the door behind me.

  “Get the fuck off of me, man,” Jared shouts.

  “I told him to block you,” I confess.

  “What the hell, Kitten?” Jared’s steaming with anger.

  Before I answer him, I see Nathan and Pop-Pop in the doorway. “Maggie needs us to be calm right now!” I say through gritted teeth. “This is not about you. This is about Maggie.”

  I see Jared’s body surrender quickly; his face softens once he registers my words. I know that he cares, but his heightened state isn’t going to help Maggie.

  “I’m good.” Jared throws his hands up in the air. “I’m good.”

  “Is she
okay?” Nathan searches.

  “She will be . . . in time,” I offer as my gaze ventures to the floor.

  Jared surrounds my body with his. “What happened? Why isn’t she in the hospital?”

  Water forms in my eyes and the lump in my throat returns, not wanting to utter the words. “She doesn’t need a hospital. It will only make it worse.”

  “What worse?” Nathan searches.

  “Mm . . . mis . . .” I can’t bring myself to say it.

  “What?” Nathan inquires.

  “Miscarriage?” Jared questions with heartbreak.

  I nod confirmation.

  “She was pregnant?” Nathan says quietly in disbelief.

  “What do you need from me? What does Maggie need?” Jared explores, pulling my attention back to him.

  “Just be here, be calm,” I instruct.

  A knock on the open bedroom door draws my attention. “Ms. Emma, I have the tea,” Ava sweetly announces, walking in and placing it on the nightstand.

  “Thank you, Ava.” I greet, trying to dry my cheeks.

  I look to Joe and he nods, confirming my thoughts. Henry knows and is on his way home.

  “The bed is ready for Ms. Maggie,” Ava politely declares.

  “Thank you,” I mumble. I turn and head back to the bathroom. Wrapping my arms around Maggie, I help her finish dressing and make sure she looks presentable.

  As we’re a few steps into the bedroom, Jared cautiously scoops her up and carries her the rest of the way to bed. With Maggie in the middle, Jared is to her left, followed by Nathan. I’m to her right as she curls into my body and Joe is to the right of me. Sadie carefully wedges herself between Joe and me and Pop-Pop sits in one of the chairs placed by the window that he moves to the edge of the bed.

  Maggie manages to drink most of the tea before falling asleep. When she rotates and snuggles into Jared, I slip out of the bed to call Kim because I don’t know what else to do, if there is anything to do other than just be here for Maggie. I don’t return to Maggie right away after speaking with Kim as my brain tries to process the events that just took place. At some point, Ava hands me a cup of tea and then disappears.

  Away from everyone, my heart begins to ache and I allow the sadness to take control of my body. My eyes sting as the tears drip. My lungs burn as they suck in each gulp of air. If it hurts this much to know I just lost a family member who hasn’t even been born yet, I can only imagine what Maggie must be feeling.