Learning to Love

by Barbara Cartland

  The Earl was beginning to make vague plans when he first realised just how rich he and Kristina now were.

  When they had everything shipshape at the Hall, he might either buy or rent a house in London and they could become a part of the Social world in which every woman wanted to shine and most men found enjoyable.

  It had never occurred to the Earl in the past that Society might be attractive as he knew only too well he could not afford it.

  Now the world had become a different place.

  Once their wedding was announced and everyone knew they were married, the invitations would roll in.

  He would have to decide whether they stayed bogged down in the country or, in his own words, ‘cut a dash’ in Mayfair.

  Every day he was with Kristina she seemed to grow lovelier and more glamorous and the real reason was happiness.

  The Earl could imagine her turning the heads of every young man she met.

  Inevitably, just as he would be present on the racecourse, the Prince of Wales would appear at the most important balls.

  Perhaps, the Earl thought, he was exaggerating the danger as surely Kristina was really too young to attract him.

  There was however no doubt that although she never bothered with her appearance, she was exceedingly beautiful.

  He could not think of any woman he had met in London who could eclipse her.

  ‘If I was sensible, I would stay here in the country with her,’ he told himself.

  Yet was he really content to be with a girl who had only just left school, day after day, evening after evening?

  But he realised that this was just what he really did want.

  It seemed strange that he was happier than he had been for a very long time, in fact for three whole years.

  And he recognised that it was entirely due to Kristina.

  He loved her enthusiasm for everything that was happening, especially the way she laughed and her spontaneous joy over the simplest things which other women would have thought beneath their dignity.

  To Kristina everything in life was exciting.

  From the swans on the lake to the herb garden, which had been sadly neglected and of course the horses.

  The Earl had to admit that while he enjoyed riding his magnificent new stallion, he enjoyed it twice as much when Kristina accompanied him.

  They would race against each other.

  If she could beat him, she was as excited and triumphant as if she had been awarded a medal.

  Thinking it all over carefully he knew that he had enjoyed this past week more than anything he had enjoyed in his whole life.

  And it was because he had fallen in love!

  As he left Kristina’s room and walked downstairs he felt that he had taken a risk in ‘telling her off’, as they would have said at school.

  At the same time, he believed his words would help transform her from an unfledged schoolgirl into a woman.

  She had appeared very womanly when she was holding the baby in her arms. The softness of her voice and the adoration in her eyes had not been that of a mere girl.

  She had been a woman with deep feelings who was looking at the result of love.

  ‘I will make her love me,’ the Earl vowed as he strolled back to his study, ‘if it is the last thing I ever do!’

  He crossed the room to the window and looked out into the garden. The gardeners who had been working round the house had achieved miracles in a very short time.

  The lawns had been cut and the flower beds tidied. Flowers had been planted where there had only been weeds. Because it was spring, the fruit trees were in full blossom.

  ‘It is as pretty as a picture,’ the Earl said to himself. What he was really saying in his heart was that it was almost as beautiful as Kristina.

  Almost in spite of himself he was praying that one day she would be his.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  Kristina took a last look at herself in the mirror observing that she had certainly made a difference to her appearance.

  She was wearing a very pretty and valuable diamond necklace which had belonged to her mother and it matched the bracelets on her wrists.

  In her ears, and it was the first time she had ever worn them, were small diamond earrings with pearls on each side, which made her look older, although they accentuated the translucence of her skin.

  Feeling a little self-conscious she walked slowly down the stairs.

  She was praying that the Earl was not still angry with her and she felt rather frightened that he may not join her for dinner.

  She would dine alone.

  It was a relief to see him standing in the study with his back to the fireplace. Even so she felt her heart turn a somersault and it must be because she was so nervous.

  She had no idea how beautiful she looked as she stood hesitating for a moment in the doorway.

  She walked towards the Earl.

  “You are looking very smart tonight, Kristina,” he said, “and may I add, very lovely.”

  He was speaking in his charming and alluring voice.

  Kristina was so relieved that she felt like running towards him, but instead she forced herself to move with dignity until she reached him.

  “Thank you for – the compliment. It is one you have not – paid me before.”

  “I have never seen you so elegantly dressed,” the Earl replied. “I feel we should ask a number of dashing young men to serenade you and a band to dance to after dinner.”

  Kristina gave a little laugh.

  “Perhaps we can do that one day – but the ballroom will need painting and decorating before we can invite anyone.”

  “We will do that once we have finished with the more important parts of the house,” the Earl answered. “As you can see, the workmen have been erecting their scaffolding all day because they say they must start at the top.”

  “I was afraid the roof was leaking,” Kristina said. “In fact there are a great number of tiles missing.”

  “I know that but now the workmen have started, you will be surprised how soon we shall be living in a palace rather than a house!”

  At that moment Brook announced dinner.

  “As you are dressed for the part,” the Earl suggested, “I think I should offer you my arm.”

  He wondered as he spoke whether she would shrink away from him.

  She placed her hand inside his arm without hesitating and they walked side by side into the dining room.

  Almost as if Brook had guessed that it was a special occasion, there were extra candles on the table together with an elaborate arrangement of flowers.

  Kristina clapped her hands.

  “Oh, thank you Brook,” she exclaimed. “How pretty you have made the table look!”

  “I hoped you would be pleased, my Lady.”

  The Earl became aware that because the table was so brightly lit the rest of the room was almost in darkness.

  He was sure that the servants, who always knew everything, had heard that there had been a quarrel and were determined that they should make it up in a romantic atmosphere.

  It was something which, when he had first been forced into matrimony against his will, he might have found irritating.

  Now he was touched because they were worrying over Kristina and him. He felt that sure his supposition was right when dinner was even better than anything Mrs. Brook had produced earlier.

  There were four courses, each of them cooked to the perfection which he expected only from French chefs.

  There was champagne for them to drink.

  The Earl set himself out to make the meal amusing and memorable for Kristina and as her pretty laughter rang out frequently he knew that he had succeeded.

  After desert which included strawberries from the garden the servants withdrew.

  The Earl sat back in his chair.

  He had accepted a liqueur which Brook had set beside him and Kristina was still sipping her coffee.

  For a moment there was silence.r />
  Then she said,

  “That was a delicious dinner and I must tell Mrs. Brook so in the morning.”

  “The servants all try to please you, because you praise them and they know you appreciate any effort they make on our behalf.”

  “They are very kind to me and they all think – you are wonderful. In fact in Martha’s own words you are a ‘fine gentleman’.”

  “That is praise indeed!” the Earl laughed.

  “They mean it and you do behave exactly as a kind, caring landlord should to his people.”

  The Earl remained quiet for a moment before saying,

  “You know that I can do so only because of you. If you were not here, the house would be about to tumble down and the Hunts and I would be sitting under a leaking roof with nothing to eat!”

  “You must not think about it,” Kristina said. “I think fate made you go – to my Papa at exactly the right moment and it is fate that is making everything we now desire come true.”

  “Everything?”

  Kristina thought for a moment,

  “I suppose because we are human beings we will keep asking for more. Perhaps if we are grateful enough – we will receive more.”

  “That is just what I am hoping will happen.”

  Kristina looked at the Earl questioningly wondering exactly what he meant.

  He rose to his feet.

  “Let us go into the study and I am waiting for you to tell me when I may look at the drawing room.”

  “The upholsterers have promised that they will bring the curtains tomorrow,” Kristina answered, “and when the room is finished we must have another celebration.”

  “We certainly will,” the Earl promised, “and perhaps we will invite a number of people to come to dinner to celebrate with us.”

  Kristina did not pause but replied impulsively,

  “I would much rather – be alone with you. It is much more fun – and we have so much to talk about.”

  “Then we will be alone,” the Earl agreed quietly.

  They reached the study where there were a great number of plans laid out on the desk for them to approve.

  The head of the firm of builders repairing the house was anxious to restore parts which had been demolished over the centuries. He had even found some old prints and brought them for the Earl to inspect.

  It was Kristina who had remembered that she had discovered some similar prints in one of the upstairs rooms. They were faded with age yet it was quite easy to see those parts of the house which had been removed.

  Kristina thought it would be interesting and a distinct improvement if they were to be rebuilt.

  The Earl was a little dubious at first, but by some gentle persuasion, eventually Kristina got her own way.

  “We will go ahead if it pleases you,” the Earl conceded, “but you do realise that we shall encounter considerable difficulties in restoring the statues which used to adorn the roof.”

  “I am sure almost identical statues could be obtained if we search for them,” Kristina replied, “and if we tell the antique dealers what we are looking for they will doubtless find them for us.”

  They talked until Brook came in to ask if there was anything else his Lordship required.

  It was then that they realised it was time they retired.

  “You must see the head man tomorrow,” Kristina said to the Earl, “and make sure he can find the right workmen for the job. I suppose they are the best firm available?”

  “I am told that they are and they are certainly moving on quicker than I expected. I saw today that they have already erected the scaffolding at the back of the house.”

  “Yes, I know, it is outside my window and rather spoils my view of the garden.”

  “Then let us hope it will not be there too long.”

  Kristina looked at the clock and gave an exclamation.

  “Do you realise,” she said, “it is twenty minutes to twelve? It has been so fascinating planning what we will do that I had no idea it was so late.”

  “Nor had I.”

  Because they had been sitting side by side looking at the plans, the Earl had been vividly conscious that she was so close to him.

  He longed to put his arms round her and pull her closer still. Yet he was well aware that she was talking to him with an ease and unselfconsciousness as if he was her brother.

  ‘Or perhaps,’ he said to himself, with a little twist to his lips, ‘her father.’

  He thought he had never seen her look more bewitching than she did tonight.

  He noticed that when she gave him a sidelong glance, she was wondering whether he was still angry with her.

  He had therefore gone out of his way to pay her effusive compliments, which were in fact the sort of compliments he had never paid to any other woman.

  “You know I would value your opinion on this design,” he had said as he passed her a print. “I am sure you are too intelligent not to realise that this is a fake,” he said of another.

  The eagerness with which she took what he was showing her and the sparkle in her eyes told him that she appreciated what he was saying.

  What he really wanted to tell her was that she was too lovely for any man’s peace of mind. And if no other man was allowed to kiss her, it was surely his right as her husband to do so.

  He had however been in command of a great number of men when he had been in the Army. He had learnt to understand the character and personality of those whom he had commanded and there had never been a soldier he could not handle.

  When women were concerned it had always been too easy. He had only to hold out his arms and they flew towards him like a bird going to roost.

  He understood only too well that with Kristina he must not be hasty as she still needed to learn about love, something she had never known and never experienced.

  He had to more subtle, more discriminating and more careful than he had ever been in his whole life.

  ‘I love her,’ he told himself, ‘and one day she will love me. But I must not put a foot wrong. If I frighten her, I might lose her forever.’

  He did not now believe that she would actually run away again, but she would creep back into her reserve and fear of men, which would make it impossible for him to approach her.

  The Earl thought a little wryly that this venture was the most difficult task he had ever undertaken.

  When he was a soldier facing a dangerous enemy he had used every ounce of his brain and brawn in the effort to defeat those he was opposing.

  Now he needed to use his brain and his experience to make one young, innocent and very lovely girl give him her heart.

  ‘I thought,’ he mused, ‘that trying to restore the Hall and the estate was a Herculean task. Now what I am confronting is an almost superhuman one!’

  Kristina stacked the plans tidily onto a side table.

  “It is so exciting to be building – a world of our own,” she enthused, “and ordaining it just the way we want it.”

  “I agree with you, but we must not make any mistakes.”

  “No, of course not,” Kristina agreed. “You are far too clever for mistakes.”

  “So are you and I can say this with complete sincerity, Kristina, that no other woman could be as intelligent and as creative as you.”

  “That is a very lovely of you to say so,” Kristina exclaimed, “and I shall lie in bed tonight feeling a glow of warm satisfaction before I go to sleep.”

  The Earl extinguished the lights in the study with the exception of one lamp. As they walked towards the door he carried it in his hand.

  “As soon as we have finished repairing the outside of the house, I am going to talk to you about installing electric light.”

  “I shall feel very up to date if we do,” Kristina replied. “Even so there is something very romantic about the house as it is now.”

  It was Brook who in the last two days had put the candles into the silver sconces which he had cleaned and they now lit th
e hall and the passages.

  Now as they reached the hall she thought how lovely the old furniture and the pictures looked in the light of just half-a-dozen candles.

  The Earl was still carrying the lamp in his hand.

  “You do not need that now,” Kristina remarked.

  “I shall need it in my bedroom, because to be honest I like reading by lamplight rather than the candles which Brook will have left for me.”

  “Wait until we install electric light,” Kristina urged, “then if you want to read all night you can just switch it on.”

  “I can think of better things to do.”

  The Earl spoke without thinking.

  It was the sort of remark which, if he had made it with his old friends or to any other woman, it would have evoked a knowing laugh and would doubtless followed by a witty rejoinder.

  Kristina asked innocently,

  “What sort of things?”

  The Earl thought for a moment and then replied,

  “It is at night that I have my best ideas, as I am sure you do.”

  “I suppose everybody does,” Kristina responded seriously. “It is the one time when one is alone and not interrupted. I feel as if I am floating towards the sky – rather than worrying about the troubles and difficulties in my life.”

  They had reached her bedroom door.

  As the Earl opened it for her she said,

  “Thank you so much, Michael. It has been a lovely evening and we will talk more tomorrow.”

  “Of course we will.”

  As she moved her hand towards the door, the Earl took it and raised it to his lips.

  He only just touched the softness of her skin.

  As he did so he felt her quiver.

  He hoped it was not with fear, but he could not be certain. Quickly he turned and walked away.

  “Sleep well,” he said as he heard Kristina’s bedroom door shut behind her.

  *

  Kristina turned round to walk across her bedroom and as she did so she became aware that the curtains were blowing out from the windows.

  There had been a slight wind during the day, but now with the darkness it had increased, although it was still a very warm night.

  Kristina pulled back the curtains in case they should knock over anything on the nearby tables.