Super Con-Nerd

by Oliver Phommavanh

  ‘Comic book artists,’ Mama says.

  ‘Okay, okay.’ I grab her finger and pull it down. I never thought Mama would ever be interested in comics. Maybe I do have a cool mum.

  Back at school, I find myself in a weird English lesson. Mrs Cheney is looking serious, sitting behind her desk like a news anchor about to deliver some bad news.

  ‘A student has come clean about their unfair methods for writing their essay. I was surprised and disappointed but I am proud of the student for having the sense and bravery to come forward.’ Mrs Cheney clasps her hands. ‘I expect all of you to do your best, but never let it be an excuse to cheat. Life is more than high marks, no matter what some people may tell you.’

  The class is deathly quiet and I see Andrew sliding down further in his seat.

  ‘So, Connor, you now have the highest mark.’

  Mrs Cheney stands up and our English class is back on the air and it’s buzzing. Andrew doesn’t put up his hand to answer everything any more, so there are other voices speaking up during the discussion. Andrew doesn’t come back to snipe at other people’s answers either. It’s like he’s wearing invisible duct tape.

  Irene leans over. ‘I could get used to this.’

  I nod. Andrew could learn a thing or two by listening to others. I know I’ve learnt heaps.

  The bell rings and Andrew walks up to me. ‘Thanks for not dobbing me in.’

  ‘I knew you’d do the right thing,’ I say. ‘Now you just have to work harder to stay on top.’

  Andrew flicks me another business card.

  I tap the card. ‘You’re going to offer me a whole year’s worth of tutoring?’

  Andrew flips the card over and his email address is written on the back. ‘Just in case you need my help.’

  I jot down my email address for him too. ‘Since you’ve caught the drawing bug, huh?’

  ‘I still want to be a lawyer.’ Andrew smiles, without a trace of a smirk. ‘But being an artist would be a fun Plan B.’

  When I get home, I check my emails, and one catches my eye. Tori Kim.

  I click excitedly on her email.

  Hey Connor,

  Hello! Sorry for not replying to you sooner. I’ve been busy in Korea, spending time with my grandmother. She is very ill, so my family has decided to stay here in Seoul. High school is fun because all my old friends are here. I’ve seen the new Dragon Wings movie, it’s great! Hope we can keep in touch, Tori.

  I read the email over and over. Tori’s alive! Better yet, she knows I’m alive too! I’m about to reply to her with a massive essay when a Phantom Zone email pops up.

  Congrats, Con-nerd, you made it into our showcase! You’re on Sunday afternoon, 1–2 p.m.

  I rush up to Dad’s shrine and dance on the spot. Then I have to wait until Mama finally gets home from her shift to tell her the news about Cosmic Smash. She’s almost as excited as me.

  ‘Do we need to buy tickets?’ she asks over dinner.

  ‘Chris got us VIP tickets,’ I say.

  ‘I’m sure people will like your dragons,’ she says.

  ‘Um . . . I thought I might draw my aliens instead.’

  Mama raises her eyebrows. ‘Have you finished with your knights?’

  ‘I don’t feel like doing them any more.’

  I’m pretty sure they feel the same way about me too. I’ve messaged the original C gang about Cosmic Smash and nobody’s replied.

  ‘If you’re going to be a dedicated artist,’ Mama says, ‘you need to finish what you start.’

  ‘I don’t know, Mama . . .’

  ‘Connor, I won’t let you give up like this.’ Mama points at me with her chopsticks. ‘Maybe I need to use my tiger skills for this instead.’

  I’ve never seen her so fired up about my drawings before. I give Mama a quick hug and head to my room. I get out my sketchbook with all the Fireproof Knights in it. What’s the point? I’m just slowly drifting apart from my friends. Is there time to save them? I look for Issue Five of Fireproof Knights and instead unearth Mandy’s purple 500YOW shirt that Mama washed for me. Maybe there is a chance for my old friends – well, one of them at least.

  I stuff the shirt into a plastic bag and rush over to Mandy’s place. When I knock, Mandy’s mum opens the door just enough so I can see her nose.

  ‘Yes?’ she says.

  ‘I have something to give back to Mandy.’ I pass her the plastic bag.

  Mandy’s mum stares at the bag. ‘Oh, hi, Connor. Come in. You can give it to her.’

  She lets me inside and I tread in slow motion to Mandy’s door.

  I can hear faint music coming from inside. I usually knock twice then just go in, but now her room feels like a giant castle surrounded by a moat.

  ‘Mandy?’ I say.

  ‘What do you want?’ she says from behind the door.

  ‘Just wanted to give you back your shirt . . .’

  ‘I told you, I don’t want it any more.’

  ‘There’s something else too . . .’

  Mandy’s bed creaks and her footsteps get louder towards the door. She swings it open and I almost fall in.

  She snatches the bag. ‘Happy now?’ She tosses the bag upside down like she’s emptying the garbage. The T-shirt comes out, along with a stack of postcards and CDs, and then a USB stick drops on her bed. Mandy holds the shirt in the air and shrieks. There are signatures all over it, from each of the band members.

  ‘It’s all for you,’ I say.

  Mandy picks up the USB stick. ‘What’s on it?’

  ‘Plug it in and see.’

  She plays the file on her computer. It’s a video with the whole band. ‘This message is for Mandy Tran,’ Gary says.

  ‘Yeah, Con-nerd tells us you’re our biggest fan in Australia,’ Joel says. ‘So we’re gonna sing a special song, only for you.’

  Gary strums his guitar and starts singing a soppy love song called ‘Smitten’. It’s so cheesy. It’s so soppy. It’s soooo Mandy. Gary is chanting a spell that melts her stone-cold heart away. By the time they finish the song, Mandy is speechless. It’s a rare sight.

  ‘I know you’re too cool to hang out with me now.’ I turn to go. ‘But I won’t let you down like that again.’

  ‘But I’m not cool,’ Mandy says quietly, her lips trembling. ‘After the concert, my mum took my phone and grounded me for a week.’ She moves closer to me. ‘When I got my phone back, none of my cousin’s friends had messaged me, not even James.’ She punches my shoulder. ‘Only you did.’

  ‘Yeah, well, sorry I stole your dream,’ I say.

  Mandy smiles. ‘Thanks for giving it back to me. Don’t worry, I’ll be at Cosmic Smash, watching your dream come true.’

  We listen to Mandy’s song again. I already know all the words off by heart because I’ve played it a million times on my computer. There’s a battle between knights and aliens going on inside my head.

  I wonder if Mandy’s right – will my dream really come true at Cosmic Smash?

  I’m on the train to Cosmic Smash, with Mama on one side and a Chewbacca on the other. Well, I hope it’s someone in a costume and not some guy who’s overdue for a haircut.

  Mama looks around us. ‘Are they all going to a kid’s party?’

  ‘No, Mama,’ I say. ‘They’re cosplayers, just like my friend Vinh. He’s in the competition today.’

  Mama watches a pair of zombies hop on. She hugs her handbag a little tighter. ‘If I’d known, I might have worn my dirty nurse’s uniform and entered.’ She winks at me. ‘I would have won for sure.’

  We crack up. I’m so pumped up for this comic convention. Nerds from all around the city and beyond are coming out of the shadows to have their day in the sun. And I’m hoping to get sunburnt.

  We hop off at Central station and walk down to the convention centre. There’s a massive queue outside the main doors. ‘Good thing we got here early,’ I say.

  Mama frowns. ‘It will take ages before we get inside.’

&nbs
p; I take out my VIP passes. ‘Not with these.’

  We head down to the VIP doors. A security guard stands outside. If he painted himself green he could cosplay as the Hulk. ‘Sorry,’ he growls. He even sounds like the Hulk.

  I flash my VIP pass. ‘I’m an artist here.’

  The Hulk shakes his head. ‘You gotta join the queue, like the other VIPs.’ He points to a snaky queue that curls around the corner. It looks just as long as the other line. We head to the back of the queue.

  ‘I should have upgraded to the Super VIP passes,’ I say.

  A princess turns around. ‘Yeah, those super passes sold out pretty quickly.’

  It’s almost an hour before we pass through the doors, and the halls are packed. The noise crunches in my head, like I’m eating a bowl of corn flakes. Mama and I walk past the different stalls selling all kinds of flashy merchandise and shirts.

  I stop in front of a Dragon Wings display. ‘Mama, I think I know what I want for the next ten birthdays and Christmases.’

  ‘Let’s go before my wallet goes on a crash diet.’ Mama drags me away, but I’m going to come back for sure. There’s so much to explore here.

  I take Mama to the artists alley, where there are artists drawing at special tables. There are people of all ages but it looks like I’m the youngest one here.

  Mama stops in front of an artist with wavy hair, named Matilda Silversides, drawing some knights. ‘Her drawings look like yours.’

  ‘Yeah, kinda.’

  Mama lunges at Matilda. ‘How much money do you earn a year?’

  Oh no, she’s let the tiger mother out of the bag. I try to pull her away. ‘You can’t ask that, Mama!’

  ‘Fine, how much do you earn in a week then?’

  Matilda taps her pencil on her chin and smiles. ‘People often ask me if I’m rich.’

  Mama coughs. ‘Well, are you?’

  Matilda roars with laughter. ‘I just love what I do.’

  ‘So that’s a no then?’

  Mama buys me one of Matilda’s postcards and Matilda signs it for me. I slip the postcard in my bag. I point to the wall at the back of the alley. ‘Our drawings could be up there on display for the people’s choice award.’

  ‘I’ll make people vote for your picture,’ Mama says.

  ‘No, Mama, it’s meant to be their choice. I’ll be excited just to see my art up on the wall, like I belong here.’

  I check out the program and my eyes light up. ‘Jennifer Gale is signing autographs at table number 3.’

  There’s a wall of people in front of the signing tables. Jennifer’s line stretches all the way back to the other side of the hall. ‘It’s gonna take ages to reach her.’

  ‘It’s okay.’ Mama steps in the queue. ‘I’ll wait in line for you.’

  ‘Are you sure?’

  ‘Anything to help you out.’ Mama lifts her handbag. ‘I have a thermos of tea and some magazines to pass the time. I’ll text you when I’m near the front.’

  ‘Thanks, Mama, you’re the best.’ I make my way to the Phantom Zone stall, checking my phone. Mandy’s running late. Stephen and Dazza are maybes. They better be here, otherwise there’s no point drawing any Fireproof Knights.

  Chris waves at me. ‘Hope you’re ready to show off your spectacular skills.’

  ‘You betcha.’ I pin up my Hyper Hybrids pictures on the wall behind the table then I start sketching Galway on a piece of paper.

  ‘Hey, that looks like me.’ Galway’s wearing a shirt with a tank pointing at me. ‘Hi, Con-nerd. I’ve spent the whole morning at the Gamehammer stall. They have some awesome models.’

  ‘I got you in my sights, Imperial scum.’ Vinh’s strapped inside a TIE fighter made out of cardboard. The black spray paint looks epic. Vinh’s dressed in an orange jumpsuit and a safety vest covered in tin foil.

  I stand up. ‘Your costume is geektastic! I love your cardboard helmet.’

  Vinh holds on to the wings. ‘You can do amazing things with cardboard.’

  Irene comes up behind him with a camera around her neck. ‘Do you want a photo?’

  ‘Yeah, but the nerdy rejects should all get into it as well,’ I say.

  ‘Let me ask someone.’ Irene tries to get the attention of a tall person dressed as an elf, but he passes her by, despite his giant ears.

  She taps the shoulder of somebody else in a footy player costume. ‘Excuse me, can you take a photo for us?’ Irene asks him.

  Hang on, that’s not a costume. And that’s not a blonde out-of-control woolly wig.

  Dazza turns around. ‘Sure thing . . . Hi, Con-nerd!’

  ‘A real fan!’ Irene yells. ‘You’re already famous, Connor.’

  ‘I’m his friend.’ Dazza turns away and waves his arm. ‘Hey, Stephen, he’s over here!’

  Stephen comes over with a grin. ‘Hey, Con-nerd, do you want us to stand next to your knights?’ Stephen stops and looks at the aliens up on the wall behind me. ‘What happened to our Fireproof Knights?’

  Dazza nods. ‘Looks like we’ve been replaced.’ He glares at the nerdy rejects like they’re his opposition on the footy field.

  My glasses slide down from my dripping sweat. ‘It’s not like that.’

  Vinh sizes up Stephen and aims his TIE fighter at him. ‘Are they friendly or hostile?’

  ‘Are you trying to be funny?’ Stephen grabs one of the TIE fighter’s wings and it breaks off.

  Vinh’s cheeks begin to bubble. Irene grabs my shoulder. ‘What kind of friends are these?’

  ‘Connor?’ Mandy sticks her head between Stephen and Dazza. ‘Who is she?’

  ‘None of your business,’ Irene says.

  Mandy’s stunned. ‘Are these your B-grade high school friends?’

  ‘We’re more friends with Con-nerd than you guys,’ Vinh says.

  ‘Then let’s see who he chooses,’ Mandy says. ‘Come on, Con-nerd.’

  I step in the middle of both groups like a referee. ‘I don’t want to pick sides. Stephen, you should say sorry to Vinh.’

  ‘Stuff this.’ Stephen walks off and Dazza follows him. Mandy hangs her head and trails behind them.

  ‘Yeah, you all get outta here,’ Vinh says.

  ‘Hey, they’re my friends,’ I snap.

  ‘Gee, Connor, just chill.’ Irene frowns. ‘If they’re your friends then why are they walking away?’

  I’m swept up in a tug-of-war between a hurricane and a cyclone. My phone buzzes in my pocket. It’s Mama.

  ‘I have to go,’ I say.

  I hurry away, wondering if any of my friends will be there when I get back.

  Mama’s at the front of the line. ‘Over here, Connor.’

  ‘How did you skip the queue?’ I ask.

  ‘I bought the Super VIP pass,’ Mama says. ‘You can get a photo and five things signed.’

  ‘Seriously?’ I jump in the air.

  ‘I know it means a lot to you,’ Mama says. ‘Come on, we’re up next.’

  Jennifer looks a lot tinier in person. Maybe because I’ve only seen her head-shots and her drawings.

  ‘Hello, I’m Connor and I want to be an artist like you.’ I get all fanboy on her, talking like a leaf blower. ‘I loved Dragon Wings! The comics are better than the movies . . .’ I take out my favourite Dragon Wings comic for her to sign. ‘Are you working on more Dragon Wings?’

  ‘Hey, Connor, nice to meet a super fan.’ Jennifer signs the front cover without looking down. She’s got mad signing skills too. ‘Yep, I’m about to start a new fantasy series called Bright Darkness. It’s got no dragons.’

  ‘Wow!’ I say. ‘You’re not worried that you’ll lose your DW fans?’

  ‘I hope my fans will follow me,’ Jennifer says. ‘I never let people force me into what to draw.’

  I want to post that quote up on my bedroom wall. I show her my Fireproof Knights and Hyper Hybrids pictures.

  Jennifer strokes each drawing. ‘I wish I’d started when I was your age,’ she says. ‘I did accounting fo
r years before I started drawing seriously.’

  Mama leans over the table. ‘Really? Drawing was your Plan B?’

  ‘Yeah, I felt like I needed another job first,’ Jennifer says. ‘I did accounting part-time before the drawing took over.’

  I lay out my pictures in front of her. ‘So which one do you like the most?’

  Jennifer laughs. ‘They’re both good. Keep going with both stories.’

  My three minutes meet-and-greet are up but it felt like three seconds. It’s enough time for Jennifer to sign my drawings. I read her message over and over again. Listen to your heart and draw what it says.

  I float away from the signing tables. ‘I’m so glad you came today, Mama.’

  Mama smiles. ‘Me too. Now, are you ready for your artist showcase?’

  I rub my hands. ‘I already know what I’m going to draw.’ I just hope my friends will come around to see it.

  I feel weird drawing while I’m being watched by random people. I wonder if Matilda or Jennifer ever get used to it. A few stop and ask me about my drawings and comics. I’ve sold some copies of some older Fireproof Knights comics. Mama’s not hovering around me, but I can feel her presence. The nerdy rejects are off at the cosplay comp and I haven’t seen any original C gang members either.

  Mama walks over. ‘You’ve been drawing the same picture for an hour. Is that hard to do?’

  ‘I’ve actually never tried anything like this before,’ I say. ‘I’m drawing one scene across three pages, I’ll need to join them together when I’m done.’

  Mama twists her neck to see my whole drawing and her smile grows like an upside down sunrise. ‘It’s fantastic.’

  ‘Yeah, I got inspired.’ I just wish my friends were here to see it. I click my fingers. Maybe there’s still a chance. I take the pages over to the showcase display. There’s just enough room for my widescreen drawing. With luck, it will stay there long enough for my friends to catch a glimpse.

  I go back to Mama. ‘I’m going to see Vinh at the cosplay competition. Wanna come?’

  ‘No thanks,’ Mama says, patting my shoulder. ‘I’ll stay here for good luck!’

  I wander over to the side of the stage, where all the contestants are getting ready.