Toxic (Desired Affliction Book 1)

by Harms,C. A.

  She hooked her arm in mine and drug me off toward the big black truck Radley was washing. It was massive, and most of the girls attempting to help could barely reach the windows on the doors. It was comical to watch.

  Loud squealing and shrieking actually broke through the air and I turned around to find the source. Will someone please shut that girl up? She sounded like a dying cat; it was so annoying.

  When my eyes landed on the person responsible, I rolled my eyes. It was the same girl who glared at me with such hate the day Kole rescued me from the ass at the bar. I still had a difficult time remembering his name.

  The girl was being sprayed by some guy who held a hose in his hand. Of course she was wearing a white bikini and nothing else. White as in when wet, it may as well have been Saran wrap. She flaunted herself and made little effort to cover up, so it was obvious she wanted all those around her to see what was visible beneath.

  Her eyes connected with mine and immediately started scanning the parking lot for Kole. Why? Hell, I didn’t know; I really shouldn’t have cared.

  The moment I spotted him I smiled. I shouldn’t have been so happy to find he was alone but I was. But that joy was short lived when I saw little Miss Bimbo herself step up to his side.

  I chose to look away.

  It was better that way, because seeing him with her only irritated me and I knew I shouldn’t allow myself to feel that way.

  I had no claim on him.

  I got back to the task at hand and busied myself once again washing the truck before me.

  I don’t know how much time had passed but I flinched when I felt an arm brush against mine. I looked over and found Kole standing next to me, but looking forward with a wash mitt in his hand.

  He had a smirk on his lips, and something about it made me feel a rush of excitement.

  He was gorgeous. He knew it, you could tell.

  “So that tattoo,” he said, still not looking at me.

  I tensed at his words waiting for some perverted smartass comment.

  But it never came.

  “It’s amazing. Hot yes, but the detail is beautiful.” He then turned his head and his smile widened. “I’d never have guessed that you’d have ink.”

  Cocky.

  Sexy.

  And started to wiggle his way beneath my tough exterior. That was exactly what Kole was doing.

  I hated it.

  But I liked it too.

  “Wipe that cocky grin off your face, Kole. You’re not getting anywhere with it.” I so just lied.

  His laughter was infectious because I couldn’t help but smile.

  “Oh really?” He bumped his shoulder against mine. “Because I have been told I can be pretty persuasive.”

  Now it was my turn to laugh. “Oh, I’m sure you can be, but I’m not your typical girl. You know, the one who falls head over heels for a sexy smile on a hot guy. I’m a little tougher to break than that.”

  He had stopped washing the truck and was now turned completely to the side, facing me. “So you think I’m hot and have a sexy smile, huh?”

  Oh my god he was so cocky.

  Get over it. I didn’t say that out loud, though, and you had to be blind if you didn’t think this guy was gorgeous. But instead of showing him I was falling for his charm I fought against it, maintaining my tough girl act.

  Fisting the sponge I held in my hand, the suds ran over my palm and dripped to the ground at my feet. I looked up at Kole who still smiled at me with a gleam in his eyes. Without a second thought I threw the sponge at him. It hit him in the chest before falling to the ground.

  His deep chuckle ran through me like melted chocolate. My body betrayed me and I marched off hearing his laughter follow me across the lot.

  My body felt warm and it had nothing to do with the heat of the day.

  Spotting a Pepsi machine across the lot, I thought it was the perfect excuse for an escape.

  Keeping my back toward the crowd of college students that spent more time goofing off than actually washing cars, I purchased the soda.

  The cool liquid felt amazing rolling down my throat.

  “You don’t think he actually likes you, do you?” I cringed at the sound of the nasally voice that came from behind me.

  I turned around to come face to face with no other than the bimbo in the see-through bikini.

  “I mean, he flirts with everyone. Don’t let yourself feel special. Give it a few minutes and he’ll move on to the next girl.”

  I didn’t give her the satisfaction of knowing she was irritating me. Girls like her only wanted to get a rise out of others, and once they got a sign they had, it was like a drug to them.

  I slowly and carefully placed the cap back on the soda bottle in my hands, and took my time before I made eye contact with the whore.

  Once I did I could see that she thought she had some hold over me. Like she had accomplished some big goal she set out to fulfill.

  I took a step closer to her and smirked. “I really don’t know who you think you are, and to be honest, I really don’t give a shit. I do, however, have some advice to offer. Don’t ever walk up to me and pretend you know anything about me. I suggest you turn your skanky ass around and go back to your happy little illusion that you and Kole are going to one day get married, have kids, and live happily ever after. Because from what I’ve seen, that is the only place you and he are ever going to have anything together.”

  “Oh, I can assure you that he and…” She stopped midsentence when I held my hand in front of her face, and she took a step backwards.

  “Wake up.” I laughed sarcastically. “It’s actually pretty pathetic that you felt the need to walk all the way over here and stake your imaginary claim on Kole. You really should gain some self-respect.”

  She laughed nervously.

  “Laugh,” I told her. “Because you know it’s all true. But just so you know, if I wanted him, I could have him in a second.”

  Chapter 14

  Kole

  “Hey, Kole, you might want to run to the rescue of your bimbo before Lexi makes sure she isn’t so fun to look at anymore,” Megan hollered over the hood of the Mustang we were washing

  I turned my body just enough to look over my shoulder and see what in the hell she was referring to and my stomach instantly dropped.

  Not because of fear that Lexi might end up hitting Hope, but because Hope was most likely saying shit that wasn’t true.

  “Fuck.” I dropped my sponge and immediately started to jog over toward them.

  “Okay, ladies, we’re here to wash cars. No need for a cat fight; put the claws away,” I said as I stepped between them. I was trying for a little humor to diffuse the problem but it backfired.

  I saw the fire burn in Lexi’s eyes almost instantly.

  “There won’t be any claws,” Lexi said. “You should choose who you spend time with more carefully, Kole. Most people fumigate when they become infested with cockroaches, not invite them to hop in their bed.”

  She pushed past me and I couldn’t help but smile at her irritated manner. “By the way, keep this fucking skank out of my face in the future.” The tone of her voice told me she was completely serious.

  I shouldn’t have found her pissed off state sexy, but I did.

  I watched her storm off as her tight little shorts showed the bottom of her ass cheeks. Her hips shifting from side to side almost hypnotized me.

  “You’re not seriously into her, are you? She is so nasty.” I took my eyes off Lexi, remembering Hope still stood nearby. I’d forgotten all about her until she opened her damn mouth.

  “Nasty? She’s nasty, is she?” I’d grown real tired of her bullshit, and right now she was really beginning to piss me the fuck off. “That’s priceless, coming from the girl who I know has slept with more than a half dozen of my frat brothers in the last couple weeks, just trying to get my attention. You would be the definition of nasty.” I turned back to look in the direction Lexi had gone. “And yes—
I’m into her. So you can cut the crap, Hope, because you’re starting to piss me off.”

  Chapter 15

  Lexi

  I spent the rest of the afternoon trying to avoid Kole and his annoying friend. I made every attempt to stay on the opposite side of the parking lot just trying to get through the day.

  Just when I thought my day couldn’t have gotten any more annoying, my overly helpful best friend had to once again prove me wrong. Her ability to see right through me and understand exactly what I was feeling was sometimes scary.

  “It’s okay to like him, you know. He’s actually a really decent guy.” She hip checked me and I chose to continue looking forward.

  “I don’t like him like that. He’s just a guy. A really cocky, self-centered, arrogant, conceited guy.” So why did he make my heart race?

  “Yeah. But again, it is okay to like him.” Did I mention that Megan was also very pushy?

  “I’ve been here for a few hours,” I said, completely ignoring her invasion into my mind. “That is a couple more than I had originally planned, so maybe I should just call it a day.”

  I tossed my sponge into the nearest bucket and suds splashed up over the edge upon impact.

  I turned around and took no more than two steps when she halted me by pulling at my hair.

  “What the hell?” I complained. Turning around to face her, I pulled my hair free of her hand.

  “Are you seriously going to walk back to campus by yourself? It’s like three, maybe four miles,” she asked with an annoyed look on her face.

  “I’ll be fine, Meg.” I was done with the interrogating questions. I was past the bimbo in the see-through bikini, and I was so over the guy I immediately noticed had been observing Megan and me.

  Kole stood only a few feet away and by the look on his face, he also didn’t agree with me walking alone.

  “What?” I said, directing the question only to him which caused Megan to look behind her.

  “I can take you back to the dorm.” It was hard to be annoyed with him when he had that concerned look in his eyes.

  I wanted to like him, I truly did. But there was that nagging feeling inside me that made being with Kole entirely too close to the one person who destroyed my life. With the help of my own parents, but that was an entirely different story.

  “I could use the walk, but thanks.” I turned around and began walking without looking back.

  Who was I kidding?

  Being a normal college student, having fun and living in the moment just wasn’t me. I had entirely too many things weighing me down, and no matter how hard I tried I always felt as if I was drowning.

  “Lex,” Megan hollered out and I just waved as if everything was good. “Will you wait up?”

  I turned around to face my nosy best friend, but she wasn’t alone.

  “You two aren’t gonna give up on this are you?” Megan arched her brow and Kole still wore that same concerned expression on his face.

  “Did I piss you off or something?” he asked, surprising me. “I thought you and me were over that awkward shit by now.”

  A silence set over us for a moment and before I could respond, Kole spoke again. Only the words he chose made the ground beneath me feel as if it was crumbling.

  “What exactly happened between you and him to make you so angry all the time?”

  My chest tightened and my hands began to shake.

  I looked at Megan and could instantly see the look of turmoil in her features. I knew than that she had betrayed me.

  The one person I trusted with everything that was dark inside me, and she managed to share those secrets.

  “I’m sorry” were the only two words she spoke, and they were all I needed to hear to know my fears were valid.

  “Matt is an ass, I know that as well as anyone else, but is it something so bad you can’t move on from it?” he asked, pushing me further into a rage.

  The air in my lungs felt as if it had disappeared. A burning sensation filled my chest and bile rose in my throat.

  “I can’t believe you told him.” A mixture of hurt and anger swarmed in me uncontrollably.

  “It just…” Megan began to speak but stopped abruptly when I shook my head and stepped back from them both, gaining some distance.

  “Listen, I’m sorry. Megan said that somehow Matt was responsible for how closed off you are. She didn’t share details, but from the look on your face I can tell it must be worse than I imagined.”

  I couldn’t do this.

  I couldn’t have this conversation in the center of a strip mall parking lot.

  Who the hell was I kidding? Even if we were safely tucked away in a secluded area, I still wouldn’t be ready to have this conversation.

  So without saying another word, I turned around and began walking away.

  Even when they hollered out for me, I kept walking.

  I needed space.

  I needed time to think. Time to decide how I should face this.

  It was too soon; I wasn’t ready.

  To be honest, I didn’t think I would ever be ready to face that darkness head on.

  Chapter 16

  Kole

  We allowed her to walk away.

  Against my better judgement, I took Megan’s advice and just allowed Lexi the time Meg insisted she needed.

  I could tell by the look in her eyes she felt horrible. Which in turn only made me feel like a complete ass for bringing it up.

  But in my defense, I had no idea it would gain the reaction it had.

  The car ride back to the dorms was silent. Megan stared out the passenger window and Radley gently rubbed her arm she braced against the center armrest. The radio softly played and it reminded me of the ride to the strip mall earlier.

  The way Lexi sang along with the music as if no one was listening—she seemed so carefree in that moment.

  That was lost the moment I opened my fucking mouth.

  “Megan, I’m sorry I said anything. I had no idea she would freak out like that.” I felt horrible about everything.

  “Kole, you couldn’t have known how she would react. It’s my fault; I never should have said anything to you.” Megan looked down at her lap and once again grew quiet.

  I don’t think any one of us wasted even a second when we came to a stop outside the dorms. We were all out of the Jeep and heading toward the entrance, as if we were on a mission.

  Only disappointment set in when we found their room empty. Evidence that she had been there was lying in a pile on the floor.

  Her shorts and the bikini top and bottom she wore were tossed between the two beds, as well as the flip flops she had on.

  Megan stood at the foot of her bed just staring down at the pile, a lost look on her face.

  “Where do you think she went?” I asked.

  Still silence.

  “Megan?” I said trying to gain her attention.

  Radley stepped around her and placed his hand beneath her chin, lifting just enough that she was forced to look at him. “Babe, do you know where she would go?”

  I could see from where I stood that she had been crying. Her lower lip trembled and that fucking shit was hard to see. I couldn’t take a woman crying, especially when I knew I was partly to blame.

  “Bar,” she whispered. “She would go to a bar. Try to forget it all.”

  “A bar?” I asked stepping in a little closer.

  “Try to drown out the images,” she said, just barely enough to hear. It was as if she was repeating something she had heard. “Take away the ache even if only for a little while.”

  Something about this entire thing was giving me a sick fucking feeling in my gut.

  “There are a shit ton of bars around here, maybe we should split up; we could cover more that way.” I suggested. Yes, I thought what I said was true, but more than that I wanted to be the one to find her.

  I needed to find her.

  “Yeah, that sounds good,” Megan whispered.

&
nbsp; A sense of relief washed over me when she agreed so easily.

  Radley dropped me off at the house and I didn’t waste any time. I climbed into my car, and within seconds I was backing out of the drive with my phone in hand.

  There was a call I needed to make.

  I had to find out what the fuck was going on, or what had gone on, between Lexi and Matt.

  The kid grew up living a charmed life. His parents gave him everything he ever asked for, and in their eyes he did no wrong. He ate that shit up, knowing that whatever mistakes he made, Daddy and Mommy would fix them.

  He was a cocky fucker and seeing him and Lexi together gave me a sick feeling.

  My patience grew thin as I waited for the douche to answer the call once it started to ring.

  After the third ring, and just as I was about to hang up and try to call again, he finally answered.

  “Well if it isn’t the infamous Kole. What the hell’s going on, man?” His voice was a little slurred and I assumed he’d been drinking. Perfect; people seemed to be more open to share shit when they had a few drinks in them. Or at least that was my experience.

  “Hey, how’s Cali and college?” I figured a few pleasantries couldn’t hurt. After all, I wanted information from him.

  Play nice, even though I wasn’t really a big fan of his. Never had been.

  Matt just laughed. I could sense the familiar cockiness in his voice.

  “It’s great, but you know that. Girls are insane, but in a good way. Being here on a full athletic scholarship has some real great perks. Girls drop to their knees for a chance to say they scored a quarterback. And who am I to deny ’em?” He chuckled. “I’m enjoying all the attention as often as possible if ya know what I’m saying.”

  “Yeah, man.” I offered the fakest form of my own joy. Matt was always a little too arrogant for his own good and I only had one reason for this call. It was time to get on with it.

  “I got a question for you. Did you date a girl named Lexi Warren?”

  He was silent for a minute and I almost asked him if he was there, then he spoke.