Memories Are An Old Man's Toys

by Elayne Tulliani

  “Alright then, I wanted to know if you would be interested in ‘going steady.’ I don’t even know if people do that anymore, but I don’t know what else to call it.”

  Sherry blushed, “I don’t know if people do it anymore either, but yes I would love to go steady with you.”

  Billy smiled, and without looking over at her he reached over and placed his hand on top of hers, and they drove the rest of the way back to Billy’s house in silence.

  With uncertainty in his voice he asked, “Would you like to come in?”

  She thought for a moment before answering. They both knew what the question implied, and it left a brief moment of anticipation hanging in the air.

  “Yes,” she said and smiled shyly.

  He thought her answer would alleviate his jangling nerves, but he was completely unprepared for how nervous her answer made him. They made their way through

  the dimly lit hallway and up the stairs.

  Sherry whispered, “You should have the landlord put brighter bulbs in this place.”

  Without missing a beat, he whispered back, “Naw, the guys a tightwad, he could squeeze a nickel so tight the buffalo would choke.”

  He was enjoying her company, and the whole time he followed behind her, he had a smile of anticipation. When they reached the landing in front of his door, he fumbled with the keys while trying to justify it by cursing about the poor lighting. She stood silently behind him and blushed. Knowing how nervous he was, just endeared him to her even more.

  They entered his apartment, and he flipped on the small lamp that stood on the little entrance table. She followed him into the apartment and took a moment to look around. Knowing now what she knew about him she was awestruck that he chose to live such a simple life despite his ability to indulge in a few simple comforts. She found it refreshing to know that he was such a simple man by choice. Billy took her jacket and neatly laid it across the back of the loveseat then while heading towards the kitchen he passed the stereo and pressed the play button, and the home immediately began to fill with the gentle sounds of Bach.

  “That’s beautiful, what is it?” she asked.

  Billy called back over his shoulder, “It’s Bach Double Violin Concerto in D minor, one of my favorites to relax to in the evening, I’ll put some water on for tea, just make yourself comfortable.” Sherry settled down on the love seat and got lost in her thoughts for a bit. She had known Billy since they were kids and she thought she knew everything of interest there was to know about him. She was baffled by the feelings she was having after the hours she had spent with him tonight. It was as if she was meeting him for the first time but was already completely comfortable with him.

  This was a feeling that was quite unfamiliar to her. Sherry was always friendly to people, and you would be hard-pressed to find anyone who would describe her as shy, but she was quite reserved around people. With Billy it was different. It wasn’t the awkward feeling of being with someone she barely knew, and it wasn’t the fluttering heart that accompanies a love interest. With Billy she was safe and comfortable and, well, it just felt right to her.

  She was fascinated with all of the things she had learned about him tonight. None of it made her feel any different about him she was just pleasantly surprised at how many sides there were to him. For all these years she had thought he was a very nice man who just got up and went to work and then home again. She knew he was very intelligent and well educated and she never understood why he didn’t get out of this town and make it big. Her respect for him deepened when she learned that he had given that all up to care for his mother. Add to that the fact that he was a wealthy man and yet wasn’t the least bit pretentious intrigued her.

  Billy came back into the parlor and stood there for a minute before she realized he had returned. He cleared his throat, and she startled and then let out an embarrassed laugh. “Sorry, I didn’t realize you were standing there,” she said.

  He chuckled back, “I didn’t want to interrupt you. You looked like you were deep in thought pondering the meaning of the universe.”

  “Oh Billy, you’re such a jokester. If you want to know, I was thinking about you.” Billy’s eyebrows went up a little, “Well I hope it was good thoughts.”

  Suddenly she felt a little uncomfortable but in a flirtatious way. By telling him that her thoughts were about him, she felt she had painted herself into a corner.

  “Well out with it,” he said, “To what do I owe the honor of dancing around in your pretty little head?”

  With that, she patted the sofa next to her and said, “Come sit with me.” Billy sat down, and she began to speak like someone who had just been handed the microphone at an award ceremony but had not prepared a speech. “I must confess, I don’t know what I want to say to you, but I know it needs to be said. Since we’ve begun to spend more time together, I feel blessed to have gotten the chance to know you better, and I have so much respect for you. I guess what I am failing miserably at saying is you have brought something into my life that I had given up on so many years ago. You have given me a place to share my thoughts and feelings and a place that is safe to share my burdens, and I could never thank you enough.”

  He interrupted her by placing his fingertips over her lips, “My dearest Sherry, there is no reason to thank me. I have not done anything for you that you have not done for me ten times over. You have made me laugh and believe me darling that is no easy task. From the time you were a small girl you have never shown me anything but kindness and as odd as it might sound, you have no idea how much you helped me back then, even though we didn’t have a lot of contact. Just you smiling at me when we passed in the hall was probably one of the few fond memories I have of school. Honestly, though, I think the greatest thing was, you had this way of looking at me when the kids were cruel that made me feel like I wasn’t completely alone.”

  “Billy about that,” she jumped in, “I am so sorry that I didn’t step in and try to stop what they were doing, I was young and stupid and…” she paused.

  Billy took the silent moment as an opportunity to finish her thought for her. “Scared, you were scared, and that’s okay, I don’t hold that against you, I never did. I was scared too, and I would never have wanted to put you in that position. To tell you the truth, if I knew that going through all of that would lead me here to you, then I would walk that road a million times over.”

  Tears began to well up in Sherry’s eyes, and she leaned in and kissed Billy and held his face in her hands. She spoke so softly, “Billy thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart for always being here for me, for making me laugh and for always knowing exactly what to say

  to make me feel like everything is going to be okay.”

  Their tender moment was interrupted by the piercing sound of the tea kettle. Billy sat and let it whistle for a minute while he immersed himself in the moment. Sherry got up and said, “That tea isn’t going to make itself, you stay there, and I’ll be right back.” He sat there with a smile of contentment on his face as he listened to her hum to the music.

  She returned a few moments later dressed in only her panties and a tank top. Her appearance caught him by surprise. Billy sat there staring at her for a moment and then whispered, “You’re so beautiful.”

  As she reached for his hand, she asked, “Do you mind if we skip the tea?”

  Billy shook his head and said, “What in the world am I going to do with you?”

  “I can think of at least a dozen things you can do with me,” she replied with a sheepish little smile.

  All of the jittery nervousness that Billy felt when he was trying to get the key in the door had melted away and was replaced with anticipation and arousal.

  Billy stood up and followed her towards his bedroom. Billy offered a gentle resistance, just enough to cause her

  to stop walking and turn back towards him. He then pulled her close to him and turned slightly so that her back was against the hallway wall. They began to kiss w
ith such passion that Sherry could feel how badly he wanted her. She found herself entranced in the depth of his come hither eyes. He had one hand on the back of her neck, and his other hand slowly slid down her back resting briefly on the arch of her back and then moving further down. As he began to caress her supple curves, she lifted her leg and wrapped it around his hip. His hand moved slowly along her thigh and then as choreographed, they both began to slide down the wall until Billy was lying on his back on the hallway floor and Sherry straddled over him.

  As she leaned over to kiss him, he reached up and removed her hair tie allowing her chestnut curls to fall gently around her face. She carefully palmed his shoulders, and as her hands moved down, she gripped his biceps and let out a soft moan. He placed his hands on her stomach and gently moved them up, and as he reached her chest, she simultaneously arched her back.

  He slowly moved his hands to the back of her neck then with gently urgency cradled her head in his hands and pulled her closer. He began kissing her neck which had her melting into his arms. He held her body tightly, and in one quick motion, she found herself lying with her back on the floor. The evening was a beautiful combination of soft, gentle lovemaking and unleashed passion.

  They eventually made their way into the bedroom which was slightly lit by the glow from the hallway. In the past Sherry had always insisted on total darkness during these times because despite the rest of the world telling her she was beautiful, she still held tight to a lot of her insecurities. Somehow though with Billy, it was different, she felt beautiful. As Billy’s eyes scanned her now naked body, she could feel his hunger for her, and she was completely uninhibited. Their lovemaking seemed to unfold as naturally as their love. They moved in perfect harmony with one another. Their eyes, hands, and mouths explored and pleased each other’s bodies until they both lay back totally satisfied and exhausted and they drifted off.

  This was the first time for either of them that sex and intimacy merged so effortlessly. Several hours later Billy awoke and reached behind him only to find her side of the bed empty. For a brief moment, he felt his stomach tighten only to be immediately relieved when he heard the oven timer beep. He entered the kitchen wearing only his sweatpants and Sherry was standing at the stove wearing nothing but his long t-shirt. Her legs looked as soft as they felt the night before and her bare feet made her look as though she felt comfortable and at home.

  In the evening light, he hadn’t noticed that her toes were painted a very pale, dainty shade of pink. He thought they looked adorable. Hell, he thought everything about her looked adorable.

  Sherry heard him enter the kitchen and said, “I hope I didn’t wake you, I tried to slip out as quietly as I could. I thought I would surprise you with a little breakfast in bed.”

  Billy laughed and said, “I don’t think my heart can take too many more surprises from you.”

  Sherry blushed and turned back to the stove. “Enough of that out of you,” she said. He knew he had embarrassed her, but he enjoyed seeing her blush.

  “Okay, so scratch the surprise breakfast in bed idea I guess I’ll just have to serve it in the kitchen.” This was uncharted territory for Billy, but he loved every minute of it.

  “You didn’t have to cook me breakfast, but since you did, the least I can do is help. What can I do for you?”

  Sherry looked around for a second and said, “Why don’t you put the kettle on, by the time the water boils these eggs should be done. I put bacon and toast in the oven to keep it warm.” Billy stood at the sink filling the kettle while he looked at the countertop. It was set up like a prep kitchen in a fancy restaurant. Sherry noticed him staring at everything and jumped in to say, “I was going to set up a tray to bring into you but just give me a second, and I’ll get this all set up on the table.”

  Billy sensed a tone that sounded almost like an apology, and he immediately felt like he needed to explain the look on his face. “I wasn’t looking at this in a bad way; I was admiring it, you have everything so organized.”

  Billy excused himself for a minute saying he was just going to grab the morning paper from the front steps. When he came back he was holding a small bunch of flowers he grabbed from the garden in front of the house. Sherry was setting everything up on the table when he walked in, and a huge smile took over her face when she saw Billy holding the cluster of flowers. “A beautiful table deserves a beautiful centerpiece,” he said.

  “Billy you are too cute,” she whispered, almost as if she was just saying it to herself. “Didn’t you go down to

  grab the newspaper, did you forget?”

  “Nope, I left it there on purpose, I couldn’t possibly care any less what’s going on with the rest of the world right now, everything that matters is happening right here.”

  They sat down and enjoyed a long drawn out breakfast that lasted well into late morning. They were both a little nervous that the morning light would bring with it an awkward silence, but that couldn’t have been any further from the truth. The conversation flowed as effortlessly as it had the night before.

  Their conversation was interrupted when Sherry heard her cell phone ringing from her purse that was hanging on the back of the kitchen chair. She reached in to retrieve her phone and saw that it was her sister calling. “I’m so sorry Billy, this is Lisa, I have to take this.” She paused for a second to read his reaction. Some people get very angry when cell phones ring during a conversation, and she knew Billy wasn’t a fan of them anyway.

  He immediately replied, “No worries at all, go make sure everything is okay.”

  She stepped into Billy’s bedroom as she answered the call. “Hi Lisa, is everything okay?”

  “Everything is more than okay. After you left, we visited with the girls for a while, and when they left, we took a ride along Revere Beach and grabbed a bite to eat. We stayed up most of the night talking with each other. Sherry, we haven’t done that in years. We talked, really talked and I don’t know…I guess I just woke up feeling good and I wanted to share that with you. For the first time in years, I feel like our marriage is really in a good place.”

  “Oh, Lisa I am so very very happy for you both and thank you for sharing that with me. Actually, I’m feeling pretty awesome myself right now.”

  Lisa waited for a second then said, “Out with it, what’s going on?”

  Sherry whispered, “I’m at Billy’s right now.”

  Lisa’s voice rang with surprise, “Oh, I didn’t realize you were coming back down today.”

  “I didn’t,” she confessed, “I never went home.”

  There was a pause in the conversation then Lisa said, “Oh my Goodness Sherry I’m so happy for you. What are you doing answering your phone? Get back to your day.”

  They both started laughing, and Sherry said, “I can’t wait to talk with you, but I don’t want to be rude either.”

  “No don’t apologize, you go enjoy yourselves, and we’ll talk later, and Sherry…I truly am happy for you from the deepest corners of my soul. You deserve to be happy more than anyone I know. We’ll talk soon.”

  They hung up, and Sherry went back into the kitchen with a smirk on her face that made Billy laugh.

  “Okay, I’m guessing she knows where you are. Is everything okay with her?”

  “Yes, she was just calling to check in and tell me she and Jimmy had a great evening, and she sends her best to you.”

  “Well, then it seems like the McCarthy sisters are two for two,” Billy replied with humorous confidence that Sherry found hilarious.

  After her belly laughing subsided, he said, “I hate to even ask you because I know it’s a bit of a ride, but since you’re on vacation all week would you like to go get some of your stuff and spend the week here?”

  “Billy, I would love to if you’re sure you don’t mind the intrusion.”

  “Mind it? I welcome it. We’ll have a good time Sherry, we can plan a few day trips and perhaps have Lisa and Jimmy over for dinner one evening if they’re ava
ilable.

  “Then I would love it too,” she said. “I’ll just tidy up

  the kitchen and be on my way, and I’ll be back in two shakes of a lamb’s tail.”

  “Wow,” Billy said, “I haven’t heard that expression in a lifetime. Don’t you bother with the kitchen, I’ll get this all cleaned up and spend a little time wrapping up some work so I can be free for the week as well.”

  Sherry changed back into her clothes from the previous evening and folded the t-shirt neatly on the edge of the bed. As an afterthought, she poured herself a cup of coffee to take with her for the ride. She kissed Billy goodbye and headed out to collect some of her things from home.

  As she walked to her car, he watched her from the window in his parlor. He was torn between hoping she didn’t see him and hoping she did. It was evident by her sensual smile that she was intuitively aware of his presence; a woman knows when she’s being watched.

  13

  THE LEGACY

  Once she pulled away from the curb, Billy turned his attention to the tasks at hand. He thought long and hard about his experience at the storage facility and the words he had read in his mother’s journal. Despite his mom having passed, he wanted very much for her to be proud of him. He knew if he allowed the Tony’s of the world to shape his outlook she would be disappointed. Although he had been struggling with how to implement his project without causing any harm he was confident that the final result would help people to reconnect in a real-life sense.

  Much like when he was a child he believed that the physical bullying was torture, but the long-term effects of

  being ridiculed and ignored were what left the lasting scars. It was this feeling that first fueled his project the evening Tony walked into his shop for help. That evening was a stern reminder that the bullies of his youth weren’t left just standing on the schoolhouse playgrounds, they had simply graduated to new playgrounds and each generation bred its own group of bullies to replenish the herd.