Wanderlust

by Roni Loren

  Her eyes flew open, and she stared into Gray’s leering face. He had braced one arm against the wall next to her head and was leaning into her. Way too close. She put a hand against his chest. “Whoa. Seriously, back up, dude. You’re trashed. And you’re having a twin moment. I’m not Ashley.”

  He smiled.

  “I’m not that drunk. I know who you are.” He reached out and pushed a lock of hair off her face. “I know who I want to kiss.”

  She tried to duck out of the way, but her reflexes were dull. He pressed his lips to hers and slid a hand around the back of her neck. Her whole body tensed. She had always thought Gray was cute, but she didn’t want this. Not her sister’s boyfriend.

  She shoved her hands against him and broke from the lip-lock. “Seriously, what the hell?”

  He smiled his charming smile.

  “I know you like me, Aubs. And you and I are way more alike than me and Ash.” He pointed at her, his finger wavering. “You and I know how to have fun.”

  Her mouth dropped open. “Have you lost your mind? You’re dating my sister.”

  “So?”

  She threw her hands in the air. “Oh, my god. You are such a tool.” She stepped around him and stalked toward the parking lot, swaying slightly.

  She arrived at the car, huffing and puffing. She didn’t have the keys, so she sat on the hood, arms crossed, fuming. What was she supposed to do now? Tell Ashley her boyfriend had kissed her? Her sister would be devastated.

  But Aubrey couldn’t let Grayson get away with it, either. She tipped her head back, staring at the stars. The pinpoints of light swirled against the inky sky. She grimaced. Maybe she was drunker than she thought. She rubbed her hands across her face.

  “Hey, girlie girl,” Ashley said, as she bounded over, hand in hand with Grayson. “Are you ready to go?”

  Grayson kissed the top of Ashley’s head and smiled at Aubrey. Aubrey wanted to punch him in his smug face. Her whole body quivered with anger.

  “You’re cold?” her sister asked, apparently mistaking Aubrey’s shiver. She turned to Gray. “Give her your jacket. She’s got goose bumps.”

  He smirked and slipped out of his letterman’s jacket. Of course he couldn’t just hand it to her. He sauntered over and helped her into it. Always the gentleman. At least in front of everyone else.

  He whispered, slurring his words ever so slightly, “It looks good on you.”

  She gave him a deathly glare and slid off the hood of the car. “You shouldn’t drive. You’re hammered.”

  He snorted. “I’m fine. Sober as a bug.”

  “It’s judge, genius.” Aubrey turned to her sister. “Can you drive?”

  Ash frowned. “I don’t want to drive. I had too much. You should drive. You had less than either of us. Plus, it’s not that far.”

  Aubrey’s stomach knotted. “Maybe we should just call someone for a ride.”

  Ashley rolled her eyes. “Like who? Dad? Say good-bye to the rest of both our junior years. He’ll never let us out of the house again.”

  Ash was right. They couldn’t call their parents. They would kill her if they saw the two of them in this condition. And the whole thing had been her idea, not Ashley’s. She would get blamed, no doubt.

  She eyed Gray, who was walking the parking lot line as if it were a balance beam to prove his stated sobriety. He missed two steps and then jumped to the end of the line and almost fell. “Ha! See. Sober as a judge.”

  Ashley gave Aubrey a pleading look. “Aubs?”

  Aubrey shook her head.

  “Well, if you don’t want a ride with me, then good luck finding another way home because I need to get going,” Grayson announced. “I can’t miss my morning class. I have a test.”

  Aubrey’s gaze scanned the strangers climbing into their cars around them and sighed. She didn’t have another way home. She shoved her hands in the pockets of Gray’s jacket and found his keys. Before revealing that she had them, she attempted her own walk of the parking lot line. She didn’t stumble and with all the drama, her head felt clearer than it had a few minutes ago. She blew out a breath. “I have the keys. Everyone get in. I’m driving.”

  “You mess up my car, you’re buying me a new one,” Grayson groused.

  “In.”

  She climbed into the driver’s seat and expected the lovebirds to sit in the back and make googly eyes at each other. Normally, Aubrey could tolerate their sickeningly-sweet affection, but after Gray’s kiss, the whole thing made her head hurt. But instead of climbing in the back, Grayson slid into the passenger seat.

  “What are you doing?” Ashley asked before Aubrey could.

  Grayson peered back at her. “I thought you could lay down back there. You look tired, baby.”

  Aubrey yawned. “God, am I.”

  Aubrey adjusted the seat and stared out the window, waiting for them to get settled and trying to focus. She could do this. It would be fine. The drive home was short and on back roads that wouldn’t be busy this time of night.

  She merged into traffic and exited the parking lot. After a few minutes on the road, Aubrey’s shoulders relaxed and her internal chill subsided. She felt okay. The roads were quiet. Ashley had stretched out in the backseat and was already asleep—or passed out. Grayson seemed content to flip between radio stations. Soon they would be home, where she could lock herself in her room and decide how she was going to break the bad news to her sister. She would definitely wait until morning to say anything. They both needed to be clearheaded for that kind of conversation.

  Aubrey cruised down deserted River Road at a steady clip. The stretch in front of them was impossibly dark, the only illumination coming from their headlights and the occasional porch light of one of the small houses that lined the left side of the road. On the right was the looming slant of earthen levee that hid the Mississippi River behind it.

  Her eyes followed the gold double lines at the center of the road. Their glow soothed her as she watched them curve and straighten in front of the car. Straight. Curved. Straight. Her hands gripped the wheel tightly but she found her breathing settling, her body relaxing. Then, a hand slid onto her thigh. She jolted and the car jerked a bit.

  She straightened out the wheel. “What the hell are you doing?”

  The harsh whisper seemed loud in the car, but her sister didn’t stir in the backseat. Gray’s hand curled around her knee. “We didn’t get to finish our conversation.”

  She shoved his hand off. “Oh, we so did. There is no conversation except stay the hell away.”

  Grayson unhooked his seat belt and slid across the bench seat. His arm stretched out on the seat behind her. “Come on, Aubs. I know it’s complicated, but I can’t pretend anymore. We’re the ones who are supposed to be together. Me and Ash don’t fit the same way.”

  Aubrey tried to breathe through her building rage and kept her eyes on the road. “I’m giving you a pass right now because you’re goddamned drunk. But if you don’t go back to your side of the car, I swear to God . . .”

  “Come on, Aubrey. You’ve always liked me.” His mouth brushed against the spot behind her ear and made her yelp. The car swerved. Ashley made a noise in the back. “Hey, what’s going on?”

  Grayson shifted to his side of the car in one quick motion, but it made Aubrey take her eyes off the road. He was sending her a panicked look. A please-don’t-say-anything look. She wanted to scream at him but forced her attention back to the road. But it was too late.

  Aubrey had missed a curve in the road and was heading straight into someone’s front yard.

  “Watch out!”

  “Oh, god!”

  Aubrey slammed on the brakes and jerked the steering wheel to the right, but the tires couldn’t grab the slick road. The car went into a spin, sending blurred images flying past the windows, and careened into an ancient oak that hun
g over the street. Breaking glass, the smell of burning oil, and screams filled the car. Aubrey’s head hit the side window and she blacked out.

  When she opened her eyes again, Gray was leaning over her, his face bloodied.

  “Oh, my god, you’re alive. Thank god. Oh, thank you.” He sobbed.

  She tried to reach up to him, but everything hurt. And she was cold. Freezing.

  “What happened?” she whispered.

  “You don’t remember?” he asked, his eyes frantic. He turned his head as if looking for someone else.

  “No.” Her mouth tasted like pennies. Blood.

  He gave a long blink. His Adam’s apple bobbed. “Aubrey, you were driving and lost control of the car. We got into an accident. And I think Ash is hurt real bad.”

  ***

  Lex piled the last of his dirty clothes into his suitcase and pushed down to get everything to fit. Why did dirty clothes always take up more room than clean ones? He forced the zipper around the sides of the bag and came up short as a piece of cloth stuck out the side, blocking his way. He yanked at it violently. The black Led Zeppelin T-shirt twisted in his fist and came loose from his bag. He stared at the knot of material, a wretched longing creeping over him. The memory of Aubrey wearing it, looking fresh from bed, flooded his mind.

  “Goddammit.” He shoved the suitcase with one hand, sending it flying to the floor, and he dropped onto the bed. Could that girl, the one who rolled with him down the hill at the zoo, the one who curled into a ball on his lap, really be such a conniving, self-serving bitch? It just didn’t fit.

  A few days ago, when everything had happened with Sean, he’d been too pissed to see straight. He’d needed someone to blame, and Aubrey had been an easy target. She’d lied to him. He’d wanted to hurt her like he was hurting. And he had.

  He’d blamed her for Sean’s near-death—the dirtiest, meanest thing he could have done to someone who already had enough guilt to fill a lifetime. “Shit.”

  He raked his hands through his hair. He had wanted to take it back the minute he’d said it. But instead, he’d let her walk out of his life in tears. And now she wasn’t returning his calls. Who could fucking blame her?

  A light knock interrupted his thoughts. Pete leaned into the hotel bedroom. “You almost ready? The plane leaves in two hours.”

  Lex didn’t look up. “Yeah, I’ll be there in a minute.”

  Pete walked across the room and laid a hand on his shoulder. “Sean’s going to be fine, man. Don’t keep kicking yourself. None of us knew. A month in rehab and he’ll be good as new. You guys can finish recording the album without him now that you have some songs written. Then you’ll be out on the road all together before you know it.”

  “Super,” Lex said unenthusiastically.

  Pete laughed. “You’ll feel better once you get back to L.A. New Orleans has been good for your writing, but nothing replaces sleeping in your own bed.”

  His own bed. The one with the massive headboard and down comforter. The one he loved to kick back in on Sunday mornings. The empty one.

  A nagging pain twisted his gut. “Pete, I need to make a few calls, do you mind?”

  He lifted his hand from Lex’s shoulder and backed out of the room. “Yeah, sure, no problem. I’ll see you in the lobby.”

  Lex waited until he heard the main door click shut then grabbed his phone and opened the web browser. He found the number he wanted and, with urgent fingers, punched it into his phone. Aubrey was avoiding his calls, but maybe he could catch her off guard at work.

  “NOLA Vibe, this is Brittany. How may I direct your call?” the receptionist said with as much enthusiasm as a slug.

  “Aubrey Bordelon, please.”

  “Hold on,” the girl said and then paused. “Oh, wait, sorry. She’s not in.”

  He closed his eyes and rubbed at the spot between his brows where a headache was forming. “Do you know when she’ll be back? This is Lex Logan from Wanderlust. I have a question about the story we did with her.”

  The girl’s voice dropped a notch, turning on the sexy. “Oh, hey there, Mr. Logan. How’s it going? I didn’t realize you were still in town.”

  If she had been in front of him, he would have been tempted to thump her on the head. “I’m fine. So, when did you say Aubrey was going to be in?”

  “Oh, right, they didn’t tell you? She’s in the hospital. Car accident or something.”

  “What?” Cold washed through him. He gripped the desk behind him. “When? Is she okay?”

  The girl grunted. “From what I hear, she’s in pretty bad shape, but like, alive and all.”

  He could no longer feel his legs underneath him. “What hospital?”

  “Tulane, I think.”

  Lex rushed out the room with his wallet and rental car key. Pete was in the lobby when he ran past him.

  “Lex!”

  He turned his head toward Pete, but didn’t stop his pace. “Leave without me. I’ll catch another plane.”

  Pete’s mouth parted as if to protest, but Lex didn’t wait to hear.

  ***

  Aubrey had been there for two days already. Two days, and she was still sleeping. Lex brushed his thumb along her palm, too afraid to touch her anywhere else. She looked so bruised and swollen. So fragile.

  “God, I’m sorry, babe,” he whispered, not knowing if she could hear him. “This is my fault.”

  He pressed his lips to her hand.

  “She’s going to be all right,” said a soft voice from the doorway. Lex raised his head to see a nurse in lavender scrubs giving him a small smile.

  “Really? Then why hasn’t she woken up?”

  She stepped in and picked up Aubrey’s chart, perusing it. “She bashed her head pretty badly. They are keeping her sedated for precautionary purposes so that they can watch for any brain swelling. But, all signs are pointing to the positive at this point.”

  Lex sagged in his chair. “Thank God.”

  She looked him over with open curiosity, no doubt noticing his tattoos and disheveled appearance. “Are you a relative?”

  He shook his head. He started to say he was her boyfriend, but that wasn’t true. What was he? A client? A bedmate? A guy who screwed her and then accused her of being a lying tramp who would sell him out for a story? “I’m just a friend.”

  She nodded. “I see. Well, I hope you don’t mind, but I’ll need you to step out for a few minutes. I have to take care of a few things for her, and only family are allowed to stay in.”

  “Oh, right, sure.” He rose, suddenly feeling awkward.

  “I’ll only be a few moments. If you want to grab a cup of coffee or something, I’ll probably be done by the time you get back.”

  Lex wandered aimlessly through the hospital hallway. The same way he had wandered two days before waiting for news about Sean. He knew where the cafeteria was, but he didn’t need coffee. He needed to talk to Aubrey before he left, and now it didn’t look like he was going to get the chance.

  He couldn’t stick around and wait for her to wake up. His record company had scheduled a big powwow for the following day to go over the plans for the album and for keeping Sean’s rehab stint a secret. He could wiggle out of things with Pete, but the record company was a whole other story. He was already playing a starring role on their shit list.

  But how could he leave New Orleans without telling Aubrey how sorry he was for the things he’d said? That the week he’d spent with her had been nothing short of amazing?

  Passing the gift shop, an idea came to him. He ducked into the small store and made his way to the card aisle. After scribbling a note in a random Get Well card, he pulled out his wallet. Tucked inside was a small square of paper that he’d been holding onto for the last few days. He slipped it into the envelope with the card and sealed it.

  When he returned to Au
brey’s room, the nurse was gone, but Aubrey wasn’t alone. Tanned fingers wrapped around her left hand. The blond ex-boyfriend—the douche—looked up at him sharply. “What the hell are you doing here?”

  Lex smirked. “I could ask the same of you.”

  “I’m her boyfriend, asshole.” The Ken doll dropped Aubrey’s hand and squared his shoulders toward Lex.

  He snorted. “Oh, really? Does she know that?”

  Pretty boy crossed his arms. “Of course.”

  “You’re full of shit.”

  “We got back together the other night,” he said, full of confidence, the lie rolling off his lips.

  Lex couldn’t believe the guy was trying to bluff him. He leaned against the doorframe with a smug smile. “Piece of advice: Next time you try to pull off a lie like that, dude, don’t tell it to the guy who’s been seeing her for the last week.”

  Grayson’s face paled. “She wouldn’t date a scumbag like you. She’s got higher standards than that.”

  Lex shrugged. “Believe what you want to believe.”

  The guy eyed him up and down with disgust. “Why are you here, anyway? Even if she did have a momentary lapse of judgment with you, I doubt she’d want to see you now. Don’t you need to be getting back to whatever hole you crawled out of?”

  Lex sighed, suddenly feeling too weary to argue. “I needed to talk to her before I left.”

  Lex glanced at Aubrey, his heart aching at the sight of her. He wished he could gather her in his arms and tell her everything was going to be okay.

  Grayson scoffed when he saw Lex watching Aubrey. “Don’t look at her like that.”

  Lex’s head snapped back. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

  The guy took a step closer to him, his glare icy. “Don’t look at her like that. Like you love her or something. You don’t get that right.”

  Lex wanted to punch the idiot in the face. Square and solid. Wanted to knock him right on his smarmy ass. The nurse could roll him out on a gurney and set him up a room across the hall. “What? ’Cause you’re the only one who gets to love her? The guy who bailed on her to go screw coeds?”

  Grayson closed the rest of the distance between them. “I came back for her. And I can give her what she needs, what she wants. Marriage, kids, a faithful husband, a nice life. What the hell are you going to offer? Free beer and threesomes backstage? Or are you ready to settle down, rock star? Play house? Ready to put the whole career on hold so you can play husband and daddy?”