Erasure

by Percival Everett

  “Yessum,” I say.

  “Mr. Dalton,” she say, “this here is the son of my friend Sadie. I told you bout him. You said I could hire somebody to clean up the pool area and trim the grass when Felipe don’t come.”

  “I remember, Lois,” he say. He look at me and reach out to shake my hand. He give it a squeeze and say, “Lois, will take care of you. I’ve got to go. I’ll be back late, Lois, so don’t wait dinner.”

  “Yessir, Mr. Dalton,” Lois say.

  Lois and I watch as Dalton drive off in his fine Mercedes. Then Lois turn to me, her face all changed into sumpin’ hard. “Sadie told me bout you,” she say. “Now, you got a chance here, boy. Mr. Dalton can help you. Yo mama is my friend. That’s why you got this chance. You understand?”

  I still be stunned by the house and the fact that Dalton be black.

  “You hear me, boy? Yo name Van, right?”

  “They calls me Go,” I say.

  “Come on in the house, Van.” She let me inside and close the door. “Fuck up once and you out the door, boy,” she say.

  “Why we gots to start out like this?” I say.

  She stop and nod her head. “Okay,” she say. “Yo mama my friend. You want this job?”

  “I don’t know what it is,” I say.

  “Sweepin, cuttin bushes and grass and washin cars,” she say. “Can you do that?”

  I looks around the house at the fine-ass furniture and the paintins and the vases and I think about the gun I’m gone buy with the money I make. Then I can come back and steal this shit. “I can do it,” I say.

  “Don’t you be sayin you gone work when you ain’t,” she say. “I ain’t gone take no mess. You mess up once and you gone. You study on that fo’ awhile.”

  “Don’t sweat it, old girl,” I say, tryin to flirt with her.

  “And don’t think I got this old by bein stupid,” she say. “You show me some respect or you can slap them dogs on down that hill.”

  “Okay,” I say.

  “Now you gots to bathe fo’ you come to work,” she say, turnin her head away from me.

  “I’m just gone get sweaty and funky while I’m workin,” I tells her.

  “But you shows up clean,” she say. “Got it?”

  I nod. “Want me to go home and wash up?”

  “Don’t get funny,” she say. “Now c’mon with me out back and I’ll show what you can do first.”

  We walks through that fine house and I just cain’t believe it. We pass on through this party kinda room with a bar and I’m thinkin I’m gone be sneakin back in there. We go on out these glass doors to outside. The pool is giant, man. And the bottom is all painted up in a design and the water look so clean and blue. There be benches and chairs everywhere and it look like a fancy park.

  Lois hand me a broom. “Sweep everythin that ain’t ground,” she say. “And pick it with that dustpan over there and put in a plastic bag. The bags be in that shed.”

  “You want me to put dirt from outside in a bag?” I ax.

  She just look at me.

  “That’s stupid,” I say. “I can just sweep it over on the ground.”

  “Do what I say, boy,” she say.

  “Okay.”

  I sweeps everthin. Then I rakes part of the big yard. Then the bitch got me moppin the floor of the pool house. Man, if I wasn’t funky befo’, I’m sho ‘nuff funky now. Lois look at what I done and nods, but she don’t smile. She just tell me she see me tomorrow and then walk on back in the house with her big fat ass.

  I decide I’m gone go on down to the pool hall and check out Tito and Yellow, see what they be doin, get Tito to buy me a taco or sumpin’. When I gets there Yellow and Tito already be in the middle of a game.

  “Where you been, nigger?” Tito ax.

  “I been workin, man.”

  “Naw, you ain’t been workin,” Tito say.

  Yellow laugh.

  Tito take a shot and stand up straight. “I know you ain’t been workin cause I went lookin fo’ yo ass over to the warehouse and they told me yo ass been fired.”

  “Yeah, but I been workin anyway,” I say.

  “Where?” Yellow ax.

  “Over in West Holly,” I say. I pick up a stick from the rack and walk round the table. I takes a shot.

  “Hey, we was in the middle of a game,” Yellow say.

  “You was going to lose anyway,” I tell him.

  “What you doin way the fuck over there?” Tito ax.

  “Don’t even ax,” I say.

  “Nigger shamed of what he do,” Yellow laughs.

  “I workin at this rich dude’s house, okay,” I say.

  “Doin what?” Tito ax.

  “Sweepin,” I says under my breath.

  “Say what?” Tito say.

  “Sweepin,” I say and both of them bust out laughin. “Fuck botha y’all.”

  “Sweepin what?” Yellow want to know.

  “Round the pool area,” I say. “Happy now?”

  “What, you some whitey’s houseboy now?” Tito ax. He puts a cigarette between his lips.

  Fatman yell over, “No smokin in here!”

  “Is the muthafucka lit?” Tito yell back.

  “Make sho it stay that way,” Fatman say. Then more to himself, “I don’t give a shit what you do outside, but I be damned you gone smoke in my ‘tablishment.”

  “Shut the fuck up, old man,” Tito say.

  “I ain’t no houseboy,” I say. “And he ain’t no whitey.” I shake my head. “I gets fired, right? So, I go to check out this job my mama told me ‘bout. I just want to make a coupla dollars to buy me a piece. Anyway, I get there and the dude’s blacker than me. And this house, man oh man, this house is a son of a bitch. Paintins on the walls, a Benz, a Beamer. I couldn’t believe the shit.”

  “What the nigger do?” Tito ax.

  I looks at him.

  “How he get rich?” he ax.

  “I don’t know. But he a rich muthafucka. The swimmin pool bigger than yo fuckin house,” I say.

  “Drug dealer,” Yellow say.

  “I don’t think,” I say. “He didn’t look like no drug dealer.”

  “I bet he be a lawyer then,” Yellow say.

  “Shut the fuck up, Yellow,” Tito snap. “I want you to make me a list,” he say to me. “I wanna know what he got in the house.”

  “I ain’t makin no fuckin list,” I say.

  “I thought you and me was tight,” he say.

  “That ain’t got nuffin to do with shit,” I say. “I’m gone make my money and buy me a gun and then I’m outta here.”

  “See, there you go, nigger,” Tito say. “You make yo money and buy yo gun and then you and me go back wif the list you gone make and we rob the muthafucka and split.”

  I laughs at him. “How you gone run anyway with a big ass paintin under your arm?” I ax. “I’m robbin that K’rean mutha and a bank. I can run with money. I can spend money. I cain’t spend no paintin.”

  “We sell the paintin, buckwheat,” Tito say. He frown at Yellow for lettin out a laugh. “We fence the shit.”

  “Where you gone fence a paintin in a fuckin ghetto, nigger?” I ax.

  “Nigger got a point,” Yellow say.

  “Shut up, Yellow,” Tito say. “What it gone hurt, you makin me the list?” he ax me.

  “Okay, shit,” I say. “I’ll think about the fuckin list.”

  “See, I told you we was tight,” Tito say.

  I takes another shot. “Since we so tight, you can buy me some food cross the street,” I say.

  “Okay,” he say.

  Tito buy me a burrito across the street at Sammy the vendor’s wagon. Sammy be blind, but he can tell the dif’rence between a one and a five. Nobody know how he do it, but he do it all the time. We be standin there eatin when this bitch come walkin by. She be wearin some little shorts and her butt meat be hangin out a little bit.

  Yellow whisper to me, “Girl got some junk in the trunk.”

  I don
’t pay him no mind. I’m just lookin at the bitch and I see she lookin at me and so I walks over and catches up wif her at the corner.

  “Hey, baby,” I say.

  “Hey, baby, yo’self,” she say back.

  “I ain’t seen you round here befo’,” I say.

  “I ain’t been round here before,” she say.

  “Dangerous neighborhood,” I says.

  She look me up and down and say, “I see.”

  “Oh, you gone be like that,” I says.

  “I ain’t bein no way,” she say.

  I realize how funky I am and I say, “I just got off work. I don’t always stink.”

  She laugh and I laugh wif her.

  “What yo name, girl?” I ax.

  “My name be Kesrah,” she say.

  I nod, thinkin bout her name. “I be Go,” I say. “Where you goin, Kesrah?”

  “Home,” she say.

  “How old you?” I ax.

  “What you care?” she say.

  “Yo mama home?”

  She shake her head.

  “Like I said, this be a bad neighborhood. I better walk you home. That be awright wif you?”

  “Awright wif me.”

  Tito call out to me. “Nigger, you be careful! That shit must be fourteen.”

  Me and Kesrah halfway cross the street now. “You fourteen, girl?”

  “I might be,” she say. “What you care?”

  “I don’t care,” I say.

  I lookin at Kesrah while we walkin to her house. She be little, but she got some big titties. She short and kinda fat, but I’m gone get behind her in her house ride her dog-style, gone make the bitch bark like a dog. That’s what I’m gone do. And I gone make baby number five.

  “You got any babies?” I ax her.

  “No,” she say.

  “You ever been wif a man befo’?” I ax.

  “Sho I have.”

  “Then you ain’t been doin it right,” I says. “You wants a baby?”

  “Yeah, I wants a baby. Everybody want a baby.”

  “I’m gone give you a baby,” I tell her.

  Fibe

  So, I gets to the girl’s house and her big fat uncle be asleep on the couch, stinkin of Colt 45. She giggle as we sneak past him to the back of the house. I tells her to shut up. Man, her uncle is big so I sho don’t want his ugly ass waking up.

  “Don’t worry none,” she say. “He ain’t gone do nuffin’ even if he do wake up.” And then we in her bedroom and she push her tongue down my throat. I gab her sweater and pull it off and she almost ain’t got no titties.

  I laugh, “Shit, girl you be almost flat-chested.”

  She get mad then. “I a woman, though.”

  I kiss her. “Oh yeah, you a woman though.”

  We gets our clothes off and I get on top her and ride her real good for a long time and she be crying and shit and saying it hurt, but she like it. I know she like it, the way she moanin like that. I fucks her good. Then I get up and pull on my pants.

  “You gonna come back tomorrow?” she ax.

  “Naw, baby, I can’t be comin round here seein you.”

  “But,” she say.

  I shake my head. “You too young, girl. I cain’t be runnin round havin people see us together.”

  She don’t know what to say, then she walk to the window. “So, you doggin me,” she say.

  I shrug.

  “Nigger,” she say.

  “You ain’t no woman neither,” I says. “You call that shit you was doin fuckin?”

  She startin to cry. Then she commence to screamin for her big ass uncle. That muthafucka be drunk as shit, but he haul his big butt off that couch and start talkin trash.

  “Who the fuck you?” he say.

  “Yo daddy,” I say and try to get through the room to the front door.

  That big sonofabitch steps in front of me and I see the nigger be wearin these funny-ass pajamas with clowns on ‘em. I says, “Nigger, look at yoself.”

  “What you talkin bout?” he ax.

  “That shit you be wearin. You looks like some kinda circus fool.”

  Then that bitch come standin in the doorway lookin all pitiftul and cryin and shit with a blanket pulled up over her.

  “What goin on?” that big nigger say.

  “He rape me,” she say.

  “What the fuck?” Then he try to jump at me, saying he gone kill my ass, but I jump over the couch and get to the door. Old fat ass fall down and knock over his forty what been on the floor. “I’m gone get you,” he say.

  “You ain’t gone get nothin,” I say. Then I looks over at the girl and I say, “But a nephew, cause I don’t miss.”

  “I hate you,” she scream.

  “And I hate you too,” I says. “What that got to do wif anythin?”

  I run on out the house and into the street and I be laughin. I run through a coupla backyards in case the uncle got a gun or some shit and I come out on the next street.

  I be on my way to the pool hall where I’m gone tell Tito and Yellow about the young pussy and that fat uncle muthafucka. They gone laugh, I just know it. I round the corner near the school when it just gettin to be dusk and I see a coupla headlights comin down the street real slow. I think, who the fuck is this? And then I see it’s a Jeep and a buncha niggers jump out and start runnin at me. I run, man. These is some fast niggers too. I try to climb the fence at the basketball courts. One of them catches my leg and I kick him off and then I get over. I run into the shadows and slip through a hole in the wall and down an alley. Then I kick into this abandon buildin and hide, be real quiet. I don’t hear ‘em. Then I realize somebody in there wif me.

  “Who dat?” I say.

  “Who dat?” he ax. Then he start laughin. He strike a match and light a candle. It’s that Willy wino muthafucka.

  “Put that candle out, nigger,” I say.

  “Shit, they gone, boy,” he say. “What they want you fo’?”

  “Some rich boy. I kick his ass and now he comin back wif his posse. Muthafucka. I bet not catch his ass alone.”

  “You bad, huh?”

  I look at his red eyes behind that candle. “Yeah, I’m bad.”

  “I used to be bad my ownself,” he say.

  “You sho ain’t bad now,” I say. “No, man, you worst.” I laughs at my joke.

  “You a funny nigger too, huh?” he say. “How yo mama?”

  “Don’t be bringin up my mama,” I tell him.

  “She still got that mole just under her tittie?” he say.

  I get up and I’m bout to kick his ass.

  “Sit down, boy,” he say with this hard voice that don’t sound like it could come out his head.

  I sit back down.

  “Listen, boy, I’m gone tell you somethin. I done fucked up my life.”

  “No shit,” I says.

  “Shut up and listen,” he say. “I don’t want you fuckin up the way I did.”

  “Who the fuck you be to me,” I say. “I don’t know you from shit.”

  “That don’t matter none,” he say. “I don’t want you messin up and hurtin your mama. She been through enuff.”

  “What the fuck you talkin bout?” I ax. “I’m gettin the fuck outta here.” I move to the door.

  “Yo mama is a good woman,” he say.

  “Yeah and you a wino,” I say. “So, what your point?”

  “Don’t fuck up,” he say.

  “Yeah, well, you too,” I say. “And Merry Christmas and Happy Easter.”

  At the pool hall Tito in the back gettin his dick suck by that fat ho who come around sometime. That what Yellow tells me. I halfway wants to go back there and watch, but I don’t. The ho might get after me and I don’t want none of that shit. Tito let anything suck his dick. Yellow be lookin at me.

  “What you lookin at?” I say.

  “Why you sweatin?” he ax.

  I thinks about tellin him about that Jeep muthafucka, but I don’t like the way runnin sound in my h
ead. “I took a coupla shots over at the hoops,” I say.

  “You was shootin baskets,” he laugh.

  “What so funny?” I ax.

  “You out there shootin baskets,” he say. “What really happen?”

  “That’s what happen,” I say. “Now, shut the fuck up.”

  Tito in back and he hear us. “What’s goin on?” he say.

  “Nothin,” I say. “Nigger just gettin on my nerves.”

  “Yeah, well I ain’t the only one be gettin on nerves,” Yellow say.

  “Watch where you steppin, funky ass muthafucka,” I say and I gives him a hard look.

  “Fuck you,” he say.

  “Fuck you,” I say.

  “Fuck you,” he say.

  “Fuck you,” I say.

  “Fuck you,” he say.

  “Fuck you,” I say.

  “Fuck you,” he say.

  “Why don’t you two niggers just go outside and fuck each other,” Tito say.

  That fat ho come from out the back and walk past. She wave her fingers at Tito.

  I shakes my head. “How can you let that ugly bitch put her mouth on yo thang?” I ax.

  “She better lookin than yo babies’ mama,” he say. “At least she know what she doin.”

  “Don’t be talkin bout my babies’ mamas,” I say.

  “Like you give a shit, nigger,” he say. He pull out a cigarette and strike a match.

  Fatman yell over to him. “No smokin!”

  “It too cold to be outside, Fatman. Let a nigger have his fix.”

  Fatman must be tired cause he don’t say nothing else.

  Yellow chalk up a stick and smile at me. “So, what happen with that jailbait,” he ax.

  “I knocked it out big time,” I say.

  “What could that little girl do for a man?” Tito say.

  I just look at him.

  “Fuckin children and havin babies don’t make you no man,” he say.

  “What yo’ problem,” I ax. “Why you comin down on me?”

  “Let’s play pool,” he say.

  Now, I’m really upset. We shoot a game without sayin nothin. Tito be smokin his fourth cigarette and be puttin ‘em out on the floor. Fatman come over and look at Tito.