Paper Dolls

by Sienna Mynx

  Zephyr smiled and blinked away her tears. “Yes, it makes perfect sense. I’m so happy for you. I hope it’s a girl, what are we going to do with a boy?”

  “Alexander wants a girl. At least he did the first time,” Raven smiled.

  “Have you told him?” Valentina asked. “What did he say?”

  “Nope, not yet. He’s going to flip out I’m sure. I still don’t know how I plan to tell him. But I can’t wait. It’s like the ultimate gift for us both. I just want to do it right.”

  Valentina leaned over and kissed her cheek. “I’m happy for you.”

  “Me too.” Zephyr winked.

  “Good, now, good food, good meat, let’s eat! I’m eating for two now!” Raven grinned.

  **

  “I’m home so let me call you back, Matt.” Valentina stuck the key in the lock and turned it while juggling shopping bags. She made a pit stop at the Aventura Mall and got a cute summer dress to wear for him, and some baby Nikes that she couldn’t resist for Raven’s bundle of joy.

  “What time do you want to come over for dinner? I might have a late session tonight,” Mattel said.

  “Oh yea? I was thinking eight. But wait what are you coo—” She threw open the door. AK sat on her sofa staring at her. She froze.

  “Valentina?” Mattel said.

  “Let me call you back.” She hung up and walked inside. “Hi?”

  When AK stood his eyes darkened with what she thought was anger if not concern. Valentina dropped her bags and went straight to him. She hugged him and kissed his cheek. “I didn’t expect you back until Friday or Saturday.”

  AK didn’t return her affection. He stood bone straight, still. Valentina slowly withdrew from her forced embrace. “Why are you staring at me like that?”

  “Why is it I had to hear from somebody else that your producer sprung you when you were arrested? I talked to you nearly every night and you never said anything about Cutter.”

  “Oh, that. He came… to help me. No big deal. I explained….”

  “Oh that? You explained! No the fuck you didn’t! You told me it was Raven and Zephyr, and changed the subject. How could you go through some shit like that and let another man take care of you? Not me!”

  “Stop shouting.”

  “Damn it, Valentina.” He put his hand to his forehead then touched her face.

  “I’m fine. I wasn’t hurt, except for my pride. Besides that cop is suspended with pay, and my attorney is all over Metro Dade. Like I said on the phone, it’s okay.”

  “The hell it is! Let me ask you this,” AK stepped back. He removed a folded magazine from his back pocket. “Open it! Page 13.”

  Valentina blinked and looked down at the gossip rag. It was one of several outlets used by the gossip hound Tim Cline. Her hands trembled as she turned the page. The top picture was of her in the car with Matt leaving the station. It called him her hero. The bottom pictures were of them playing in the grass after she washed his car. And the most damning picture was the final one. It was of Matt leaving her house with her at the door in a robe. The captions all speculated about an ongoing affair, with a picture of AK in concert calling him the jilted boyfriend.

  She put her hand to her mouth. “That Cline bastard did this. He’s lying.”

  “You fucking him, Valentina?” AK asked.

  “No. I mean no. We never had sex,” she quickly said.

  “Then what did you do?” AK took a step toward her.

  “Earl, let me explain.” she reached for him.

  AK knocked her hand away. “You been fucking around on me with this white boy all along? Making a fool of me? Playing me?”

  “No. I swear I haven’t!” she pleaded.

  “So it’s lies? He wasn’t here with you in the middle of the night, and you weren’t in your robe? That’s not you lying on top of him in the grass?”

  “Yes it’s me, Earl, but you know these pictures are used to exaggerate things. It’s not like it was planned. I mean we never planned any of it.”

  AK gave her a look that stopped her heart. His whole demeanor was growing in severity. She reached for him then stopped herself. Again she fought to find her voice. “When I told you I needed time to think it was because I was confused, sweetie. I had to decide what I wanted, but I never cheated on you.”

  “You kiss him?” he asked.

  “Huh?”

  “DID YOU FUCKING KISS HIM?”

  “Earl, it’s not what you think. You’re wrong about how it happened.”

  “Me? I’m wrong? Let me get this straight.” He rubbed his jaw. “So all the times I said ole boy had a thing for you,I was wrong? And all the times I said you two weren’t just best friends, I was wrong? All the times I said you and I were going to be together forever because nothing could get between us, I was wrong?”

  Valentina shook her head. “I love you.”

  “DON’T YOU SAY THAT!” he shouted at her. “You don’t know what love is. I’m such a fucking idiot. Everybody called it. My crew, Red—”

  “Oh please Dirty Red wants to fuck you!”

  “And you don’t! You never did, right, Valentina? I was what—your thug photo-op to keep your name in the papers?”

  “That’s not fair. I never used you or cared about your fame. I loved you, I still do,” she pleaded.

  “Fuck off! Get the fuck out of here with that bullshit. I get it. So you fuck the producer then you fuck the rapper, just to keep it balanced and interesting right?”

  “I’m going to ignore that because you’re hurting. What I had with you and him are two different things. I woke up one day and I was in love with you both!”

  He stiffened, momentarily abashed. “You love him? How long have you loved him?”

  His misery was her undoing, she couldn’t believe the kind of pain she put on him. But it wasn’t intentional, and nothing she said could convince him of it. Valentina turned away, unable to face him. AK snatched up her globe centerpiece off the coffee table and threw it through her flat screen TV. She whirled around in a start and looked at him horrified.

  He took a threatening step toward her and she took one back. “You lying bitch!” he shouted at her. Tears fell against his will. She had made him cry. She’d never seen tears before with Earl. He trembled with raw hurt. “What was I supposed to do, Valentina? Tell me! Tell me!” he shouted.

  She put her hands to her ears shaking her head through her sobs.

  “How was I supposed to prove myself worthy of you? Why wasn’t I ever enough for you?” He began to pace. “Man I’m such a fucking idiot. This man was in my face with you in his arms, and I fucking believed everything out of your lying mouth. I fucking introduced you to him! I did that!”

  “I’m so sorry.”

  “No you aren’t! I called you last night. Where were you?” he asked.

  Valentina put her hands to her face and continued to cry.

  “You were with him. Every time I left town you were fucking him.”

  “NOOOO! It was never like that!” she shouted.

  “I fucking hate you. Bitch!” he said.

  “Earl, please! Try to understand!”

  “You have no fucking idea how much I loved you, Val. I thought we could have it all. Fuck, it doesn’t matter. None of this shit matters anymore.” AK gasped.

  “What am I supposed to say, you keep twisting things. You won’t let me explain any of it. That magazine, the blogs, the videos they’re lies. I mean we didn’t do it on purpose. I never did any of it on purpose,” she choked out through her sobs.

  “You and that motherfucker are together now? You think you can scrape me off and then live happily ever after with that motherfucker! You think you can humiliate me in front of the whole world and I’m just going to take it? That I’ll still be your chump!”

  “I hurt you, and for that I will never forgive myself, but you’re a better man than this. You always were. That’s why I fell in love with you.”

  “Fuck you!” he spat, “Fu
ck you!” he shouted in her face then stormed out. Valentina clutched her chest. A raw and primitive grief at the loss of his love consumed her. Her gaze switched over to the damaged TV and then to the door. Trapped in her own deception she couldn’t move with the stab of shame buried into her heart. She didn’t want to accept how badly she had hurt him.

  When she felt her legs again she walked over to the magazine and picked it up. She ripped it once, then twice, and then tore it apart, and screamed. Putting her face in her hands she broke down and wept.

  **

  “You want me to come over?” Mattel asked. He turned at the light.

  Valentina sniffed. “No, no, I just want to be alone.”

  “I’m sorry, babe, I wish I could do something to make this right,” Mattel said.

  Valentina started to cry again.

  Mattel listened.

  “You should have heard him, Matt. I’m a terrible person. I was lying to him still. He saw through it. I did betray him, and I can’t take it back. He was good to me. When everybody turned their backs on me, he was there. I did this. Why do I keep fucking up?”

  “Valentina, I’m coming over.”

  “No, Matt. I’m fine. Come in the morning. Just let me be alone tonight. I got to work through this.”

  Mattel drove up to his driveway. “I love you, Valentina, and I’m here for you. Okay?”

  “Okay, love you too,” she said softly. “G’night.”

  “Night,” he said and sighed. He dropped his head back on his headrest he closed his eyes. The urge to comfort her was strong, but it was selfishly motivated. He was a man. The idea of the woman he loved mourning another man hit him where he lived and breathed. He’d just have to get over it. He threw open his car door and got out. As he closed it he saw a black Suburban slowly drive up on his street. Mattel didn’t stop or pay it any further attention. Instead he headed for his front door. But before he reached it he heard multiple car doors slam. Men with bats ran up to him. The first to approach, he swung at before the guy could lift the bat. He knocked him down. Another hit him on the arm and he winced, but charged him and brought him down. He punched and wrestled with him, to get to his feet. Then he felt a crushing blow to the back of his head and it all went dark.

  The limousine tinted window rolled down slowly. Dirty Red stuck her head out. “Yawl mutherfuckers c’mon!” she yelled at her crew. The squad was kicking and beating Mattel as he lay unconscious. They finally took off and ran for the truck. Then they all sped off into the night laughing.

  **

  Valentina sat up in bed. The ringing of her phone was grating her nerves. It just wouldn’t stop. She told Mattel that she needed to be alone. Why was he calling? Finally she got up and snatched up the phone.

  “Hello?”

  “Valentina, it’s Bill.”

  “Bill?” Valentina frowned. Bill Davison was a partner with Mattel in his production company. “Hey, what’s up?” she asked, looking to the clock that read 11:35.

  “It’s Matt,” Bill said.

  “Matt? What’s wrong with Matt?”

  “He’s in the hospital and it’s pretty bad. You need to get to Mt. Sanai as soon as you can.”

  “Are you sure? He’s at home,” Valentina asked.

  “He was attacked tonight. The neighbors found him. How soon can you get here?”

  Valentina was already dressing. “I’m on my way,” she said. She ran around her bedroom stumbling over herself to get her things. None of it made sense. He had to be fine. He just had to be.

  **

  Valentina rushed through the automatic doors to the Emergency room nurses’ station. There were two other people ahead of her, but she couldn’t wait.

  “I’m looking for Mattel Cutter, he was admitted,” she said.

  The nurse ignored her. Valentina pushed past the person at the front of the line. “Excuse, me I’m sorry. I really am,” she said through her tears. “But please, please tell me where he is!”

  The nurse blinked at her. The kind lady next to her smiled. “Help her, it’s okay,” she said to the nurse.

  “Thank you,” Valentina said. “His name is Mattel Cutter, white male.”

  “He’s in ICU, they have him in room 1354.”

  Valentina took off for the elevators. Intensive care? Bill said he was beat up? Her mind struggled with all of the different types of horrors she could imagine. How bad was it? Once on his floor she saw Bill and Mattel’s brother. Valentina stopped when she noticed the police questioning them. She walked over slowly.

  Bill smiled. “Thanks for coming, Valentina.”

  “How is he?” she asked.

  “He’s stabilizing. He took some pretty nasty hits to the head. He hasn’t regained consciousness yet.”

  “I want to know who the fuck would attack my brother!” Jarrod snapped at the cop. “Why aren’t you out there looking for them?”

  “We don’t have much. No one saw the attack,” the officer said.

  “Matt has security cameras around his house. Wouldn’t that tell you?” Valentina volunteered.

  “Shit! That’s right!” Jarrod said. “How could I not think of that? Fuck, I can get the videos to you.”

  “That would help. Thank you,” said the officer.

  Valentina felt a cold sense of dread sinking in her stomach. She prayed she was wrong. She prayed that it was some random senseless act and not retaliation. She prayed that this wasn’t her fault. She looked over to Bill. “I have to see him, please.”

  “Jarrod, is it okay?” Bill asked.

  “Yeah whatever.” Jarrod said, “We’re going to find these sons of bitches and they’re going to pay,” he said. He stormed off with the officer. Bill took her by the arm and led her to Matt’s room.

  “They said he’s in a coma, but that’s to be expected after the head trauma he’s suffered. Don’t be alarmed by what you see. It was a pretty bad beating. Matt’s strong though. No internal bleeding, only a few fractures. All in all when he wakes we will know more.”

  “Okay. Okay.”

  He pushed the door open for her. She walked inside and looked upon him. His head was wrapped and his face was black, blue, and red all over, with lumps the size of gumballs. He had a tube in his mouth breathing for him. She felt faint.

  “Matt?” she said. She walked over to the bed. His suffering was now hers tenfold. She took his hand and broke down in tears. “What happened, baby?”

  She rubbed his bruised knuckles. “It’s okay, you will be okay. I’m so sorry. Please be okay,” She found it hard to breathe through her tears. She hurt all over. “I handled this all wrong and I have to fix it. I can’t lose you, Matt. If I do, I don’t know what I’ll do.” Valentina gulped hard, hot tears slipped down her cheeks. “Matt, I’m so sorry.” Then she wept harder, holding his hand. One of Matt’s fingers jumped in her hand and her head lifted. She wiped at her face, her vision clouded by her tears.

  “Matt?”

  He moved his fingers once more, this time two of them. “Oh thank you God,” She said. She lifted his hand and kissed it. She saw rapid movement of his eyes under his closed lids. Sadly they didn’t open. “I’m here, baby, right here. You hear me don’t you? I’m not leaving. I’m staying right her. I swear it.”

  She lowered the bed rail and tucked in his covers. She sat at his bedside. She rested her chin on her arm staring at him, waiting for him to wake. She’d wait forever if she had to.

  **

  “Valentina?”

  She woke up. Bill stood at her side.

  “Oh hey?” she looked back to Matt who was resting peacefully. “What time is it?” she asked Bill.

  “It’s about six in the morning. Maybe you should go home.” Bill suggested.

  “No. No, I can’t.”

  “Jarrod called. The police arrested the people responsible an hour ago,” he said.

  A heaviness centered in her chest. “They did? Who was it?”

  “Members of the Mob Squad. They were cau
ght on video beating Matt. The fools actually drove up in their Suburban.”

  Valentina stood. “Was AK with them?” she asked.

  Bill shook his head no. “They’re refusing to name him. But Jarrod said the police might question him.”

  “That’s a fucking lie!” she said.

  Bill frowned. “What’s going on with you and Matt?”

  “Can you do me a favor? Can you call me when he wakes? I have something to do.” Bill tried to stop her but she pushed past him with her purse. She was determined to pay her ex-lover a visit.

  **

  Valentina used her key. She threw open his door and slammed it. “Earl! EARL!” she shouted to the top of her lungs. “EARL!” she screamed then took to the stairs, running up them. Half way up, Dirty Red came running down in a robe that belonged to her.

  “What the fuck you doing here?” Red hissed.

  Valentina stopped and glared. “Stay the hell out of my way!” she snapped, and pushed past her going up the stairs.

  “He doesn’t want to see you! Get the fuck out!”

  “Go hose yourself off you smell like a cheap imitation of me!” Valentina tossed back. She stormed down the hall.

  “Who the hell do you think you are?” Dirty Red said.

  Valentina whirled around. She seethed with anger and humiliation. Dirty Red stopped in her tracks and Valentina advanced on her. “I’m the bitch you’ve been trying to imitate. Remember? You couldn’t wait to poison him, make him do something as ugly and vicious as this! I know you had something to do with it and I swear, I’ll gut you, bitch, if you don’t back the fuck off!”

  “Stop it, Valentina!” AK shouted from the open doorway.

  Red and Valentina both turned to see him standing there in nothing but a pair of fatigues and Timberlands. He had a bottle of Hennessey in his hand.