Saving Micah

by Kristy Marie

  Chance jumps on her bed and she screams as she bounces. Levi takes the chair that goes to the desk and Zant comes around the bed and lies down beside me. Now I’m in the middle of him and Macy.

  I look over to him and his eyes are a bright green this morning. “Hey.”

  “Hey.” He says with a cute little smile.

  “Where are we eating?”

  “Waffle House.”

  He went for it. He knows my weakness.

  “Oh really? Are you trying to score brownie points for something?”

  “I don’t need brownie points. I just know what my girl wants.” He winks and I let out a little giggle.

  Raisin bread, people. Raisin bread.

  I jump out of bed and run to the bathroom to get dressed. For raisin bread and apple butter. No shame. That stuff is pure heaven.

  Kelly decides to stay behind and says she will grab something for brunch. She isn’t ready to get moving just yet.

  Once our breakfast has been ordered and the waitress has brought our drinks, we start to plan the day.

  “We need to go souvenir shopping before we spend all of our money on food.” I say as I sip my coffee. It’s good but it isn’t my coffee. I doctor mine up so that it’s more sugar and creamer than coffee and my coffee is pretty mild. I love it.

  “Yeah, I need to get my mom and sister something.” Macy says while looking at her phone.

  “Ok then. Are y’all coming too?” I look at Levi while he looks at Chance and he looks at Zant. I turn my eyes to Z to collide with his. “Well?”

  “I don’t know babe. I’m not really into shopping. Do you and Macy want to go ahead and get that done while the guys and I go look around for some activities for us to do later?”

  My heart stops. He isn’t coming with me? He must notice the look of confusion and terror on my face because he grabs me and pulls me to his lap so that he can put his lips to my ear. “Micah, you can do this. I want you to do this. I know you can and I think you know you can. This is a test babe and I have all the confidence in the world that you will pass.”

  As he’s talking to me my eyes are on Levi’s. I see shock pass through them first, then anger, and finally understanding. He knows what Z is trying to do for me.

  I nod my head to Levi and Zant feels it. He kisses the side of my head and puts me back in my seat. “I love you and you’ve got this. You’re my brave little butterfly.” He says before he fully lets me go.

  I steady myself and take a couple deep breaths to steady myself. I’ve got this. I can do this. “Ok Macy. We can do that? I saw a souvenir store a couple buildings down. We can go there.” I turn to Zant. “Y’all can pick us up there in an hour.” I can only do an hour and I hope that I don’t have a panic attack in the meantime.

  “We will be there.” He says as our food comes.

  We eat our food and then prepare to go our separate ways once we get outside. Zant kisses me on the forehead before getting into the van with the guys. Macy and I make our way down the sidewalk to the souvenir shop. She grabs my hand and we walk like we have no cares in the world. I try really hard to make that thought my reality.

  Chapter 12

  Zant

  I’ll be your crying shoulder

  I’ll be love suicide

  I’ll be better when I’m older

  I’ll be the greatest fan of your life

  {‘I’ll Be’ -Edwin McCain}

  I watch my girl walk down the sidewalk hand in hand with one of her best friends in the world. She has her back straight and her head held high. I’m so freaking proud of her. She needs to do this. She needs to do this for her. She has been afraid of every little thing for too long. She isn’t in danger from the monster that terrorizes her mind. She has nothing to worry about from that freak. I can’t tell her that though. She can’t know anything about that.

  “We aren’t completely leaving them, are we?” Levi ask in a shocked voice. He has been super protective of Micah and has helped her in any way that he can since the attack. I can’t thank him or Chance enough for everything they have done for her. They stepped up and moved into protective mode for her and the other two girls. Kelly and Macy both went through living hell after the attack. They were afraid for Micah. They were afraid for themselves. They were even afraid for me. They all waited for Roy to come back around and start terrorizing them all.

  It wasn’t going to happen.

  “No man. We aren’t leaving them alone. We will be close. They just won’t see us.” I tell him as Micah and Macy walk out of site. “Chance, what is there around here for us to get into tonight?” I turn and look at him in the backseat.

  “I don’t know, man. I will have to look but right now I am in shock. What if she freaks out in there? What if someone touches her?” He’s looking toward the direction that they went. “I need to text Kelly and let her know what is going on.”

  “No.” I tell him quickly. “Don’t text Kelly. Don’t do anything. We are just going to sit here and we are going to let Micah do this. We will handle whatever happens while she is in there. And we will be waiting for them when they are ready to leave.” I look to him and then at Levi with a, that is final, look in my eye. They get my point.

  “As long as we sit here.” Chance says under his breath. There is complete silence after that.

  After about fifteen minutes of sitting in silence, I speak up. “Chance, you’ve got to find us something to do tonight. I want Micah to think that we left them alone while they were in there.”

  “Oh yeah. I will look now. What is something you guys are into?”

  “How about some mini golf?” Levi suggest.

  “That actually sounds pretty fun” I tell them. “Find the right place for us, Chance, and get directions. We will get these two when they come out and then go back to the hotel to get Kelly. She should be well rested by now.”

  Chance lets out a grunt. Levi and I chuckle and leave it at that.

  About forty-five minutes after the girls left, I pull the van over to the parking lot of the store and park it where we can see the front door. I’m worried about her but I make my butt stay seated in the seat.

  “Want me to go check on them?” Levi ask.

  “No. They are fine. They will be out soon.” I say as I continue to stare at the front door. Forty-five minutes. I’m starting to get anxious. She hasn’t been gone that long. How can I ever leave her?

  A few minutes later, I see Macy coming out of the door but I don’t see Micah. I sit up straight in my seat and hold myself inside the vehicle. I hold my breath. Where is Micah? Macy walked outside but stopped near the door. She is looking back towards the building. A few heartbeats later, Micah comes out of the store. I hear a collective sigh from all three of us.

  I get out and make my way towards the girls. Micah sees me and runs towards me. She jumps in my arms and wraps her legs around my waist. I’m a little shocked but I don’t dare let go.

  “How’d it go, sweet thang?” I ask her without showing any anxiety that I had over her.

  “It went great. We got a few things for everyone. You’re going to love what I got you.” She says as she kisses my cheek. She makes a move to get down so I slowly lower her to where her feet hit the pavement.

  “Well are you going to show me now or make me wait?”

  “You’ve got to wait. Just like everyone else.” She says as she moves to Chance. Chance grabs her by the shoulders and brings her in for a quick hug before dropping his hands and backing away. I’m watching Micah and she doesn’t even flinch.

  Levi is next and he wraps his arms around her from the side. Her hands are full of little bags so hugging her full frontal wasn’t going to be easy. She leans her head onto his shoulder and he kisses the back of her head. She straightens up and he lets her go. She then makes her way back to me. She is completely normal acting and I am about 0.2 seconds away from doing a happy dance.

  Macy speaks up and ask us if we ever found something to do tonight. “Kell
y is ready if you guys want to go pick her up. She needs to do some shopping.”

  “More shopping? Come on girls. We can’t spend the whole day shopping. A guy has to do other things.” Levi whines. I can tell he isn’t being serious but trying to get under their skin. It is probably going to work.

  Micah hits him in the stomach with a couple bags and he hunches over himself. I start to laugh along with Chance. “Idiot.” Chance says.

  When we get back to the hotel, the girls need a few minutes so Levi, Chance, and I stay in the lobby. There really isn’t any need for us to go back to the room. What are we going to do? Straighten our hair?

  Girls.

  About ten minutes later, the girls come down and we head out to the van again.

  “Where are we headed ladies?” Levi ask.

  “I need to go shopping. I didn’t know you guys were going to go shopping without me.” Kelly says. I can almost hear her pout.

  “Kelly, I told you that you were going to miss things if you decided to sleep in. Macy and I went right after we ate breakfast.” Micah reminds and informs her.

  “What did the guys buy in the store? I only saw you two with bags.” Kelly says. Oh, here it comes.

  There is silence so Macy takes the lead. “Actually, Micah and I went shopping alone. The guys went to look for us something to do tonight.” It takes a second for it to sink in then….

  “WHAT???!!!!” Kelly shrieks. “The guys let you two go out on your own? They weren’t with you? Boys y’all better be explaining.” Her country accent has hit full force.

  “Chill your heals woman. The girls were fine.” Chance has decided to put this fire out. I am all too happy to let him. Kelly is a firecracker.

  “How do you know they were fine? You weren’t even there. Anything could have happened to them.” Kelly says.

  “Kelly. You weren’t there either. Micah did good. Didn’t you Mi?” Chance ask Micah to add to his statement. “Yes. Kelly. I was completely fine. Nothing happened. I needed this. Besides, I had Macy.” I look in the rearview mirror and catch Micah’s eyes. I give her a wink and she winks back at me. A huge smile lands on my face as I look back to the road as we make our way to a different souvenir store.

  Chapter 13

  Micah

  I let you see the parts of me,

  That weren’t all that pretty

  And with every touch you fixed them

  {‘Just Give Me A Reason’ -P!nk}

  I did it. I really did it. I trusted myself and I was able to do something on my own. Of course, Macy was there but, none of the guys were. For so long, I haven’t done anything without one of them with me. After Roy attacked me in my very own room of my house, I was unable to be alone at all. I always thought I heard him. I expected him to pop out of a hiding place and finish what he started.

  My nightmares have gotten better but, the fear hasn’t completely left me. Therapist have helped me along with my parents and my friends. However, I’ve learned no matter how much therapy you have, the fear never fully leaves you until you just aren’t afraid anymore.

  That is what I am still waiting on. To not be afraid anymore.

  After shopping and site seeing, we go play mini golf and find a place to eat supper.

  The rest of the week we spend our time at the beach and the hotel pool.

  It is the best week of my life.

  On Sunday, we load the van up and make our way back home. I’m ready to see my parents. I haven’t been away from them this long in all my life. This is a preview of how life will be at college though. I’m thankful I will have my friends there with me so I will not be completely alone.

  I know they are all going to the same community college as me so they will be close to me. I said nothing to discourage them at the time it was mentioned. I couldn’t imagine my life without them around me. I truly feel like I will fall apart on my own. Without saying a word, they understood that. I’m truly grateful.

  We get home a little before supper and Mama has enough food cooked to feed an army. So, the army stays to eat.

  Everyone goes home after eating and telling my parents all about our trip. Levi tells them about my ‘solo’ trip to the souvenir store. My mom had tears in her eyes and dad tells me how proud of me he is. I feel totally proud of myself. If words were a trophy, I just earned an Emmy.

  Zant stays to help me get everything unpacked. Afterwards we are in my room watching a movie. He’s lying on the floor while I’m on the bed. I muster up the courage to ask him the questions that I’m ready to know the answers to.

  “Zant.” I say to get his attention. He looks up at me. “Can we talk?”

  He sits up on the floor to give me his full attention. “Yeah, sure. What’s up?”

  I take a deep breath. “Where’s Roy? He hasn’t been here since that night and I’m still afraid he’s going to show up.”

  Zant just stares at me before he takes a big gulp. I see his Adam’s Apple move up and down. He looks at the floor for a little bit before he lifts his eyes back to me. “Micah, I would love to tell you but, I can’t right now.” My stomach hits the floor. I didn’t think Zant would ever keep anything from me.

  I know that Roy hasn’t been home since he attacked me. It was never discussed where he went exactly. Dad just told me a couple days later that he was gone and he wasn’t coming back. My parents took over everything and Zant was able to stay in his house and alternate between my house and his. Now that we are 18, Zant is an adult and doesn’t necessarily need my parents for legal things.

  Mom and Dad made sure that Zant had everything he needed for the past two years. He ate at our house every night. They bought him anything he needed. We did most things together and Roy was never around. Zant went to the same therapist I did. It was mentioned a couple weeks ago that he wasn’t going anymore. I didn’t ask if he was better. I didn’t ask if he needed to still go or not. I’ve been too focused on myself honestly. I’ve been selfish.

  “What do you mean you can’t tell me? I thought we could tell each other anything?” I’m shocked that he isn’t willing to just tell me what I want to know. I’m also a little hurt and it is growing.

  “Micah, I need to talk to you about this when your parents are around. I can’t handle this on my own.” He says this while looking me in the eye and I can tell that he is hurting himself by doing this to me. I don’t push him because I don’t want to fight with him.

  “Fine. I want to know and I expect an answer tomorrow when we can all sit down and talk about it. I’m tired of walking around looking over my shoulder. I’m going to college in five months and I need to know what or who is out there waiting for me.”

  Zant nods and says, “I understand what you are saying Mi and the only thing I can tell you right now is - you are completely fine and completely safe.”

  “I trust you and it is only because of that that I am willing to let this go. For now.” I tell him while giving him my most serious look.

  He gets up from the floor and slowly moves towards me. I keep my eyes on his as he gets closer. “May I?” He asks before lowering himself to my bed. I nod to him and he puts his arms around me.

  “Micah, you are safe baby. You are safe right here. You are safe everywhere. You have changed, yes, but in good ways too. You are more aware of things. You are more on guard. You are more reserved. It sucks to be that way but it is survival instincts too. You need that. The world can be a bad place. College can be a bad place but, I fully believe that you are going to be ok. With and without me and the other guys around. You are stronger than you give yourself credit for.” His mouth is right next to my ear as he whispers these words to me. I feel tears running down my cheeks but I’m unsure why I am even crying. “Shh. Don’t cry love. You are ok. One day at a time.”

  He pulls back and kisses my forehead. “I love you. I will always love you. Always remember that, ok?”

  “Ok. I love you too, Z.”

  “I’ve got to head to the house and get som
e sleep. We go back to school tomorrow to finish out our senior year.” I grin at him. We have been working hard for this and it is finally here.

  “You’re taking me to school, right?” I ask him as he gets up and grabs his chucks to slip on.

  “Of course. I will be here at the normal time for breakfast.” He winks at me. It’s no secret that he loves my Mama’s cooking.

  I laugh at him as he makes his way towards my bedroom door.

  We never have that talk.

  The next few months pass by without incident and graduation finally comes.

  I didn’t know that I would be broken again.

  Chapter 14

  Zant

  Funny you’re the broken one but,

  I’m the only one who needed saving

  {‘Stay’ -Rihanna}

  The end of our high school years is finally here. Tonight, is graduation night. I’m anxious and nervous. I’ve been on a rollercoaster my entire life and this milestone that I have made it to is just another high part of the ride. The next dip is coming and I hate that it has to be this way.

  “Man, are you ready for this? We are about to be graduates!” Levi is super stoked about finishing high school. The closer we got to the last day, the more excited he became.

  “Yeah, man. I’m ready. We’ve finally made it.” I tell him while I look at him. He is going to be so pissed at me. I must do this though. I’m never going to be able to help Micah any further if I don’t do this. Maybe if I explain, he will understand.

  No. He won’t understand. The only person that knows ahead of time about this is Mr. Davis and he is the one pushing me to do this. I know all of this is for me but damn, it’s hard.

  I stand up and cheer really loud when Micah’s name is called. I can see her turning pink in the cheeks from where I’m sitting. She is so freaking cute.

  She does the same for me when my name is called. I know she would love to embarrass me but I give it back to her and turn toward the crowd and take a bow. I can hear Levi laugh from the stage.