Attracted to Fire

by DiAnn Mills

  Perspiration beaded his forehead. The stable was warm, but the intensity on his face topped the thermometer. “Once I’ve finished with my story, then I’ll ask you the yes-or-no question.”

  Could she please have a break? “I’m listening.”

  “Since we spoke about faith, what I’m about to say is more of a confession. Something I hope can stay between us.”

  “Absolutely.” Oh, Ash, just get on with it.

  He swallowed hard, as though he might change his mind. “Seven years ago, while working counterfeit in LA, I was working undercover with two other agents involving drugs and gang warfare.”

  Bob had mentioned something about an incident seven years ago. This must be difficult for him . . . more than difficult.

  “One of the agents was my best friend, more like a brother to me. The other agent was a woman. During the deal, things went south. When the gang pulled weapons, the woman agent reached for hers. Fire broke out. My friend lay dead. The woman critically wounded. I was shot too.” He took a deep breath. “I blamed Annette. Watched the footage repeatedly. Still do. But the truth of the matter is I hesitated. Joel’s death and Annette’s permanent paralysis were my fault.”

  The emotion in his voice made her want to touch him, console him in some way. “You can’t blame yourself for what happened to them.”

  “Oh yes, I can.” Bitterness wove through his words. “I vowed that day no one would ever die on my watch again.”

  Wade. Now she understood why he despised Chip. “Ash, you’re wrong. You aren’t responsible for your friends’ deaths or the woman’s injury.”

  “But here we are bringing Chip back onto the scene.”

  “I see why you feel this way, except I don’t agree with your shouldering the burden.”

  “It’s also why Lindsay’s safety is my top priority, and my agents are . . . well, they’re very important to me.”

  “I understand.” He had to be A2Z. His life focused on performance. How very sad. “I’m going to pray you find peace with your past. If God doesn’t hold the situation against you, then neither should you.”

  He gave her a grim smile. “I figured you’d say something along those lines. On good days, I can form all the arguments about dealing with it. On bad days, I crucify myself all over again. Anyway, I appreciate your listening.”

  “Thank you for having the confidence in me to share your story. We all have our closet memories.”

  “You too?”

  “Oh yeah. But not today.”

  “One hard-luck accounting is enough.” His smile faded. “Which brings me to my question.”

  She wasn’t any more ready to hear his next words than when their conversation began, but she’d do her best. Her cell phone rang. She slipped it from her belt and noted the caller ID. Mom. They’d just talked two nights ago. Her head pounded while she forced away a gnawing fear. “Hi, Mom. Everything okay?”

  “I’m afraid not.” Mom choked on a sob. “Shelley’s gone.”

  “You mean she left the rehab?”

  “Yes. Sometime yesterday morning. They called and said she’d signed herself out. The director tried to talk her out of it. Said Shelley was crying, but they couldn’t convince her to stay.”

  Ash must have detected her need for privacy, for he left the stables.

  “Mom, let’s not think the worst. Has she called? Have you contacted any of her friends?”

  “It’s too late. The police found her body behind a sleazy hotel. Overdose.”

  Chapter 41

  Meghan snapped her phone shut and replaced it on her belt. Her thoughts seemed paralyzed by the devastation, not that she hadn’t lived with this possibility for years, but she’d always believed Shelley would one day be able to walk away from the drugs.

  A wasted life.

  “Bad news?” Ash stood before her. Odd she hadn’t seen him walk back inside the stables.

  She took a deep breath to steady the sadness threatening to envelop her. “My sister was found dead. Overdose. She left the latest rehab. . . . Police found her body.”

  “I’m really sorry. No wonder you’ve taken such a personal interest in Lindsay.”

  “And another reason why the president wanted me on her protective detail. Looks like another piece of why I’m on this team just slid into place.”

  “It all makes sense.”

  “I . . .” She swallowed a sob. “In working with Shelley, I became acquainted with other addicts. I learned how they could manipulate. Saw the desperation when they did whatever it took to get the next fix. Saw the withdrawal symptoms—” She stopped and walked from the stables, away from the dim light. The tears wanted to flow, but not until she was alone.

  “Hey, there’s no need to talk about this.”

  “But I need to. I wanted so much for my sister, just like I do for Lindsay.” She took a deep breath. Control. “I need to rent a car and drive to Abilene tomorrow after my shift.”

  “I’ll make the arrangements. Do you want more time to spend with your family?”

  “No. I’m okay.” She forced herself to look at him. “It’s important for me to spend every moment I can with Lindsay. I don’t want her to end up the same way.”

  “I understand. You’ve done wonders with her. Right now, I’m going to leave you alone. Don’t worry about Warrington. I’ll take care of the arrangements.”

  “Thanks.” She remembered his question. “You wanted to ask me something.”

  He waved her off. “Unimportant. We can talk after you get back.”

  She watched him walk toward the front gate. He still wasn’t satisfied with the position of the security camera. His attention to detail may have earned him his A2Z nickname and the bottom rung of a popularity ladder, but in truth he’d saved people’s lives.

  Keeping Shelley alive had been her goal too. But Meghan had failed. She hadn’t been able to convince her sister that fleeing her problems in a state of euphoria didn’t make them go away. Meghan touched her mouth to silence the audible grief. Their poor mother. She’d believed Meghan had the means to help Shelley fight the addiction. Every time she got strung out and needed help, Mom contacted Meghan for advice . . . and money . . . and whatever else was needed.

  Meghan had let Mom down twice in the past few months.

  Ash turned to observe Meghan, who had walked to the fence overlooking the pasture. She stared at the grove of trees and the winding creek, but Ash knew her thoughts weren’t about nature. He believed she blamed herself, and he knew that feeling. He wanted to comfort her, but he held back. Why? If his heart had found a home in hers, why couldn’t he be the support she needed in her time of distress?

  So many complications. Caring for Meghan muddied his career, while it also made him feel fresh and alive.

  After checking the security camera and assuring himself it was in the proper place, he walked back to the house. Grabbing a can of Diet Coke, he saw Dave had kept Lindsay past their normal counseling time. She no longer shouted like a drunken sailor, so maybe he’d made progress. While he waited, he walked to the operation room, where Victor studied something on his computer.

  “Victor, heads up. Meghan’s sister was found dead of an overdose.”

  His eyes widened. “I didn’t know she had a sister.”

  “Neither did I. Anyway, she’ll be leaving tomorrow after her shift. Thought you should know.”

  “Yeah. Thanks.” He shook his head. “No wonder she goes over and beyond what’s necessary with Lindsay.”

  “Right. Answers a lot of questions.” Ash sat in front of his computer and checked e-mail. Startling news drew him into Warrington’s message. “Finally. Listen to this from Warrington: ‘We’ve made an arrest regarding the threats on your protectee. One of the e-mails was traced to a computer in the possession of a twenty-five-year-old illegal from Colombia, Carlos Vargas. He was living in an apartment in Maryland. Found a large stash of cocaine and street drugs. Fifty K in cash. No previous record. Claimed he worked a
lone. Denies knowing Jorge Ramos. Thought you’d want to know. We’ll get to the bottom of this soon.’”

  Ash eased back in his chair, relief spreading to his fingertips. Meghan would want to know the new development. Vargas’s arrest lifted some of the pressure from all of them. With a little interrogation, the man would tell the Secret Service what they needed to initiate other arrests.

  “I’ve got to head back to my shift in a few minutes. Will you make sure Meghan sees this update?”

  “Sure thing. I wonder how many others are working with this guy.”

  “Hard to say. But this is a beginning.” Ash logged on to Lindsay’s e-mail, always checking for a lead. Although a man was in custody, habits were hard to break. A message popped up. Ash scanned it and pounded his fist on the table. Why can’t these guys leave her alone?

  Victor glanced up. “What’s up?”

  “Here’s another message to Lindsay. ‘Guess you heard an arrest was made. Bet the Secret Service thinks you’re tucked away safe, and we’ll never find you. Wrong, little lady. Your instructions will come soon, and in the meantime, you’ll learn we mean business. When I tell you I want to meet with you, I’m serious. There’s a bar about eight miles from the Dancin’ Dust. What do you say?’”

  “Whoa.” Victor scooted back his chair.

  “My thoughts too. Alert the rest of the team. I don’t like the sound of this one.”

  Chapter 42

  Ash thanked Victor for volunteering to take his shift so he could monitor any updates from DC. But as the evening edged toward sundown, the likelihood of Vargas’s offering information decreased. Again the latest e-mail couldn’t be traced.

  Ash found Meghan alone in the living area. So sad. He captured her gaze. “It’s been a long day for you.”

  Her shoulders lifted and fell. “If you don’t need me, I’d like to take a walk.”

  “Do you want some company? Victor told me to get lost for another hour, and I have my phone if Warrington calls. I can listen to whatever you have to say.” He paused. “You did it for me.”

  Meghan nodded. “I’d like that. The area on the other side of the creek near the grove of live oaks is pleasant. Serene. And this time of day it’s cooler there.” She offered a sad smile. “I’ll take a flashlight in case the sun sets before we get back.”

  He grinned. “Deal.” And if she needed a shoulder to cry on, he could do that, too.

  After Ash informed Bob and Trey the two of them would be away from the house for a while, they walked beyond the barn into the pasture toward the creek.

  “Burnette has a good eye for horses.” She motioned toward three horses near the fence. “We had a couple of good quarter horses when we were kids, but not like these. I loved ranch life, the freedom, fresh air, and quiet. The Dancin’ Dust reminds me of home. And of Shelley.”

  “You and your sister spent a lot of time together?”

  “We did. Dad believed horses kept us out of trouble. Worked for me.” Meghan stared out over the pasture. “Shelley was my foster sister. My parents tried to adopt her, but her mother showed up enough times to keep Shelley stuck in the legal system, as though spending a few hours with Shelley made her a mother. That’s why she’s not listed in my file.”

  “I heard you tell Bob your parents kept foster children over the years.”

  “It was an important part of our life—a way for Dad and Mom to share our faith.”

  “Wasn’t it hard to say good-bye when they left?”

  “Painfully so.”

  “Can’t imagine anything worse than becoming attached to someone, then losing them.”

  “Losing my dad was worse.”

  Ash wanted her to tell the story. He knew the man had been shot. Let her voice all the things tearing at her heart.

  “I know my records state a drunk killed him. Dad tried to stop a friend from driving drunk, and he pulled a gun. That was my dad. Always wanting to help.”

  “Like you.”

  She stuffed her hands into her jeans pockets. “Oh, I can be pretty selfish.”

  “Don’t think so. Your record shows your sacrifices, and I’ve seen all you’ve given to Lindsay and the team since you’ve been here.”

  “Thanks, considering—”

  “How I felt about having you on my team?”

  She laughed lightly. “Ah, exactly.”

  Meghan had changed the way he looked at life . . . and his future. “So how did your sister handle your father’s death?”

  “Dad was her hero, and his death hit her harder than Mom or I realized. She withdrew into an emotional cave. Counseling didn’t help. We both had our moments of rebellion. Not sure what to do without Dad. She turned to drinking. Then to pot. Her senior year she straightened up and made plans to attend Texas A&M, where I’d already completed three years. Shelley wanted to be a psychologist. Said she needed to help kids like her who’d been knocked hard by abandonment issues. Then she got mixed up with the wrong crowd, and the problems started again. She didn’t make it past her sophomore year. We tried one rehab after another. I actually thought she was making progress this time.” Silence hung between them. “There were times I gave up. Told her so. This last time, I told her I was finished. The bank of Meghan had officially closed. She had to fight the battle. So, now you’ve heard my closet confession.”

  He understood what stalked her. Ash turned to a bird with gray feathers, its sound not matching its looks.

  “That’s a mockingbird.” She watched it rise into the evening sky. “Sort of like how I feel. Anyway, Shelley was gorgeous. At least she used to be before the drugs took over.”

  “Like Lindsay?”

  “So much like Lindsay that at times I want to shake some sense into her. To me, keeping our protectee safe also means keeping her healthy.” She glanced at him. “I believe in my job, Ash. Every aspect of it.”

  “It shows,” he whispered. “Between you and Dave, Lindsay is making strides to build a new life.” They continued walking, and he didn’t care if they walked until midnight. “Were you able to keep in contact with Shelley?”

  “Every chance I got. Mom and I paid for rehabs and counseling. But she didn’t really want to get clean. To Shelley, her life held no meaning. She and Dad were extremely close. He encouraged her to go on to school and seek out God’s purpose for her life. After his death, the only thing that mattered to Shelley was escaping into drugs. This last rehab was her idea. She came to me and pleaded for help. Said she was ready to leave it all behind and make sure when she saw Dad again that he’d be proud. We believed her, especially when she went to church with Mom.”

  “How’s your mom doing?”

  “I talked to her again a few minutes ago. The funeral is Tuesday. She’s okay. Told me not to give up on our protectee. She doesn’t know the extent of her issues, just what she’s heard from the media.”

  “Do you mind discussing Lindsay?” Ash had deliberated her circumstances since he was assigned to her. He’d never found the answers, but he wanted them.

  “Not at all. If you haven’t figured it out by now, I’m invested in her. More now than before.”

  “Do you think she wants to change?”

  “Most of the time, I think she does. But as I’ve said before, a fear stronger than an overdose is twisting inside her. Although she is responding to Dave and we see a huge improvement, I’m concerned it’s for the wrong reasons. Cooperation means she gets to go home. On the other hand, is the source of her nightmares in DC? If so, going home is a setup for suicide.”

  “You’ve claimed she’s afraid. Explain that to me.”

  “The way she leans so close to the truth, then backs off. I’m convinced she’s covering something so deep that she can’t get out. But I need proof. I wish she’d understand we want the best for her, not simply to babysit her until she has the freedom to resume her old lifestyle.”

  “So you think the music, the reading, and the other interests are a cover-up?”

  “I t
hink they’re diversions. Here she has the opportunity to explore interests that she hasn’t time for in DC.” Meghan lifted her chin. “I think this is less about who was selling her drugs and more about something far worse. The bombing pointed in that direction, Wade’s death, the e-mails. Even the scorpion on my pillow.”

  Ash thought she stretched her last comment. “Are you serious? Scorpions are a part of the habitat here.”

  “Then why was the wire mesh removed from the air duct in my room and the others were intact? Think about it—I’m the only female agent, and President Hall asked me to help his daughter find purpose in her life. And I bet I’m the only agent highly allergic to bee stings.”

  Irritation hammered against his head. “I trust all the agents on my team.”

  “But, Ash, whoever is causing the problems has our trust.”

  He shook his head. “Chip? Ethan’s dead.”

  “I have no one to pinpoint, only the inkling that the answer is closer to us than we could ever imagine.”

  Was this about a woman’s intuition again? “I can’t go along with your supposition. Everything points to drugs and Lindsay’s history.”

  “Even Wade’s death?”

  They stopped beneath a live oak. In the distance, the fiery sun played its last tribute to the day. He took a deep breath. “My suspicions run on logic. I’ve run backgrounds on every agent here, looking for a hole. We have cutting-edge software, and still we can’t trace every e-mail or find out who’s behind it.”

  “My mind has worked through a dozen scenarios. And I have an idea.”

  Ash studied her. “Your sister’s been found dead, and your mind is working on finding who’s responsible for all the chaos here and in DC?”

  “I have to. If I dwell on Shelley, I’ll fall apart.” She swiped at a tear. “The best way I can pay tribute to my sister is to help Lindsay find her way back. I know we’re protectors, not crime solvers, but I believe part of the problem is here.”

  “All right. What’s your idea?”

  “Think about what I’m proposing while I’m gone. This last e-mail was hostile. But what he wanted was for Lindsay to meet him at a local bar. My guess, it’s a dive where only good ol’ boys and their girlfriends hang out. I’m Lindsay’s size, and we have similar features. I want a wig, blue contacts, and a set of clothes. Let me play the part and beat this jerk at his own game.”