Butterflies in Honey (Growing Pains #3)

by K. F. Breene

  Her whole body went lax as bliss permeated every inch. She hung on to Sean’s giant shoulders like a rag doll. His arms loosened and he lowered her down on the bed, keeping himself inside her as he laid on top. His face was full of wonder as he looked down at her, into her.

  “Please no more, Sean.” Krista gasped. She was raw gratification, but also just raw.

  His chuckle rumbled deep in his chest. “That was what I have been daydreaming about these last years. I would ask you if it will suffice, but the look of awe gives you away.”

  “You’ve upped your game since I saw you last…”

  “Are you asking if I slept my way through San Francisco to learn a few tricks?”

  Krista hesitated. In point of fact, yes she was, but in a roundabout way. She didn’t want to hear about the women he was with, but he didn’t get this good with his hand alone.

  “To ease your mind,” he went on, “and probably make you laugh at the same time, I took a class on Tantric sex. It was enlightening.”

  “Why did you take a class?”

  Sean shifted and pulled out of her. She didn’t bother opening her eyes or even closing her legs. She was perfectly content to sleep exactly as she was. It wasn’t meant to be, though. Two strong arms slid under her and lifted her into the air.

  “Stand for a minute,” Sean said.

  Krista moaned her displeasure, still without opening her eyes, and held her legs firm when Sean set her down. After some rustling, which must’ve been the covers, she was scooped up and set into the bed. Sean slid in beside her, cuddled close, and pulled the covers over them.

  Sean said softly. “I told you that I felt like a jerk. That I knew I made a big mistake, but was too chicken to make it right. Well, I’m not going to lie and say I was abstinent the whole time—especially in the beginning. But it never felt good. I felt guilty. Whether on a date or otherwise, I was uncomfortable. I felt like I was cheating. Somewhere along the way I decided to improve my…skills. In honesty, I did practice, but with the sole intent of being able to wow you.”

  Krista let the silence linger for a second before she said, “It sounds like it was your way of not feeling guilty to have sex.”

  Sean blew out a breath he was holding. “You know me too well. It was for you, but also—yeah, I’m no monk.”

  “It’s not like I was abstinent, either. I was planning on settling down. Kinda.”

  “About that. What is the story with Chet?”

  “What do you mean? I dated him. I told you that.”

  “I know. Why? He’s a nice guy and all, but… He’s a bit of a mook.”

  “A mook? What’s a mook?”

  “I dunno—kind of a douche. As Kate would say—has said—he’s a bit ridiculous.”

  Krista sighed and turned to put her head on the hollow between Sean’s shoulder and chest.

  “I know. Marcus said I had blinders on. I don’t know—the guy treated me well. He made me dinners, always had time for me, bought me flowers…He just made me feel special. No offense, but I needed it.”

  “He is handsome.”

  “Are you going gay on me?”

  “I don’t have to be gay to size up the competition.”

  “Yes, he is handsome.”

  “Is he good in bed?”

  “Yikes, Sean.”

  “Is he?”

  “I don’t kiss and tell.”

  “Yes you do. I’m sure Marcus knows all about it from Kate and Jasmine, to whom you tell everything. Is he?”

  “Damn it, why—look, no he wasn’t great. And before you ask, you are much bigger than him…size wise. Okay? Happy? Is your ego intact? Why does any of this matter? Were you hoping my sex life was crap or something?”

  “I’m sorry. It matters because I am wondering if I have to worry about him getting you back. He is a douche, but a woman needs to feel cherished, and obviously I have been lacking in that department.”

  “Yes, you have. But I have no plans to be wooed by Chet. I broke it off with him before you even came to L.A., remember?”

  “Marry me, Krissy.”

  It took her a minute before she understood what he said. When she did, she sat up straight as a rod. She had had enough. Sean was too much too soon. She was still having second thoughts about his priorities and he springs that on her? Too much too soon.

  Sean sat up with her. “I know I have been busy, but as soon as work slows down I’ll have a lot more time.”

  “Sean, you don’t ask a girl to marry you on the first date. You just don’t. Find time for me, preferably before I give up on you, and we’ll talk. Otherwise, take me home right now. I am too tired for this circus show.”

  “Okay, okay.” Sean had a smile in his voice. “You win. Let’s sleep, yes?”

  “I’m serious Sean.”

  “Note to self, do not push Krista when she is tired and relaxed.”

  “Exactly,” she said in a huff. She allowed him to lay her back down and hold her tight. Despite his plans, their future was very much undecided. She did not want to spend her life alone in this giant house.

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  It turned out that Sean had been right about buying Krista’s dream home. He was on a small cliff overlooking the ocean. That was great, but not nearly as awesome as the small trail leading down the cliff to his private beach. He actually shared the beach with a few other homes, but Sean, and now Krista, were the only ones that surfed, so they had the decent waves all to themselves. It also meant Krista spent most nights there.

  Unfortunately, as was Krista’s fear, Sean spent an absurd amount of time at work, and while that conversation would have to be brought up soon, Krista was too stressed worrying about Tory’s visit. He would be checking out their region and trimming the fat. While she was mostly in good shape, that ol’ fear of failure had her working overtime, trying to add mortar to every shaky brick she saw.

  When Tory finally did come, it was déjà vu as they sat down to dinner. It was San Francisco all over again. She had to keep reminding herself that there was no reason to be sad, that she wasn’t moving away from Sean and her friends this time; she was merely changing jobs—possibly. She didn’t think Tory could match the salary thrown at her thus far. There were some staggering numbers out there. She liked her job, yes, but she liked three-figures better.

  Tory was sitting with his hands clasped on the table, his menu off to the side.

  “So Krista, how has interviewing gone?”

  “I was never very good at interviewing,” Krista smiled. “I either sound over-confident, which men hate, or I sound weak. Mostly they were a formality, though. I have worked with three of the four companies directly, through you, and the fourth apparently knows about my work already, so…”

  Tory leaned back as the waitress showed up to take their orders. When she was gone, Tory said, “Once upon a time, you asked me how I would feel if another company showed up to moonlight you. Do you remember my response?”

  Krista thought back. It had been at the dinner after her big presentation to Tory when she was at Dexico. “You said you would think you missed something, find out their worth, and possibly counter-offer.”

  “And here we are. I am ready to counter-offer.”

  “You also alluded to hoping the person in question didn’t know their worth.”

  Tory laughed. “Yes, I did. However, based on what Mr. McAdams said, that is no longer the case with you.”

  Krista shrugged and took a sip of her wine. She didn’t know her worth, exactly, but she knew what she was being offered.

  “How can I entice you to stay, Krista?” Tory asked.

  “I hate to sound like this, but it really does only come down to money. I want to buy a house and a new car. Those things cost money.”

  “It only comes down to money?” Tory asked with a twinkle in his eye.

  Krista stayed silent. She hated being so material, but that was capitalism for you. The organizations that handed out houses weren’t l
ooking her way.

  “Well, I think I can give you more than just a raise,” Tory went on. “I think I can give you opportunity. It is well known, I think, that Sean is excellent at the big picture. He can reach for goals most wouldn’t even contemplate. But he needs someone to take his unrealistic expectations and make them a reality. He needs someone to map out a route. What I am proposing is unique to this situation. I have suggested moving you to Junior VP, directly beneath him, with the managers reporting to you. Sean would deal directly with you, and you would deal directly with the managers. It would give you authority to reorganize departments, and then keep them running smoothly. With it comes more responsibility, of course, but also allows me to offer a higher wage to compensate…”

  Krista listened in fascination. Like the last time she spoke with him, the job was exactly what she was after. It was everything she liked about her job now with the power to do more. Plus, she had always wanted to learn more about Operations. She had been reading up on it, and she had some ideas already. With Sean’s help, she could definitely make some improvements.

  “Yes, I can see that has sparked your interest,” Tory said with a twinkle in his eyes. “And now we come to how much I will have to pay out to get you to stay.”

  Krista half smiled, looking down at her half-eaten steak. “Do you know what I have been offered thus far?”

  “I have a fair idea. Marcus loves to talk about you and Ben doesn’t understand which things need to remain secrets.”

  “Ah, yes.”

  “But those positions can’t offer you what I am offering you. You would not be challenged. You would not be working with your friends. You would not get to dabble in fields you currently have no access to.”

  “But I would have my own home and a car that didn’t have the engine light on. And who knows, they might.”

  Tory leaned back and studied Krista. “You are better at negotiation, I see.”

  Krista smiled. “I now know what I want. More importantly, what I need to make this decision. Unless you give it to me, I will have to move on. I need to go where I am valued the highest.”

  “That is wise.” Tory leaned forward again. “I will offer you $100,000 a year, plus an advantageous bonus based off of your results. I will also move you to a fully vested status with your retirement package once you sign a year contract with your new position.”

  “That is $20,000 less a year than my highest offer.”

  Tory’s eyes widened briefly. “What of the other perks?”

  “Bonus would work out to another five or so, no benefit perks.”

  “The question becomes, how much could you make off of a bonus based on results?”

  Krista leaned back. “I would have to see the bonus structure. I will also not settle for less than one-hundred and ten.”

  Tory stared at her. “I liked negotiating with you better when you were lamb eyed.”

  Krista laughed. “Those were the days. I wouldn’t be such a stickler, but it isn’t fun working with most of the upper management in your company, Tory.”

  “Yes, that is changing, but slowly.”

  “What did Sean say about all this?”

  “I blindsided him. On purpose, I must admit. He comes up with remarkable things when he feels overwhelmed. Hopefully when you step into place—“

  “If.”

  “—it will take some of the pressure off of him. At this rate, he will burn himself out.”

  “He has always been ambitious.”

  “So have you, but you have a more level head on your shoulders to deal with it. Sean has yet to learn about limitations.”

  Krista nodded. So true.

  Chapter Thirty

  Sean and Krista had been dating for five months and she spent four or five nights a week with him. The sex was better than fantastic. Waking up and going surfing with him was a dream. Waiting at her house until late to meet him at his house sucked. He still worked all the time. Even with Krista stepping in to a Junior VP role, taking the weight off of him for day-to-day grievances, Sean was stretched thin. He and Krista had only gone out for a total of three dinners. In all those months, they went out a miserable three times.

  He had met her at happy hour a handful of times, but it was usually only for a brief few hours before he went home to bed. He had less than a handful of days off, and for those he was always distracted. It was exactly what Krista didn’t want for them. Sean kept trying to push his key on her so she could just head to his house after work, but she kept saying no—at least Jasmine was at her house. No one was at his.

  She decided that she needed to get away for the weekend. It was going to be her ultimatum to Sean. He would either take the weekend off and go with her, or he would find himself a new fuck-buddy. She couldn’t even call herself a girlfriend—she didn’t see him enough for that. He didn’t even see her enough with all her clothes on to call her a friend.

  As Krista entered the code to gain access to Sean’s driveway, her heart was aflutter. She’d spent two solid hours talking with Kate and Jasmine about what she would say. They all chose dates for the getaway, and decided San Diego was a good place to head. It was close, it had some good surf coming up if the weather and currents and all that panned out, and it would only take a couple days of their time. Sean just had to agree to it, then pick the date that worked best with him. Krista was basically hand-wrapping a vacation for him, hoping he would agree.

  She walked through Sean’s quiet and darkened house. It was eerie that a place so big was so empty. It was like a museum after closing. All the money Sean spent on the new digs was wasted, except for two rooms—the kitchen and the bedroom. No other room saw activity other than the monthly cleaning lady, who merely dusted and wiped away cobwebs.

  Krista made her way to the kitchen and found him where she knew she would—at the kitchen shoving something into his face. He was staring out into space, not tasting what was on his fork, nor caring. Krista stopped to observe him before she made herself known.

  He looked tired and drawn. His shoulders were slumped, his head hung, and he wasn’t enjoying the food that was unceremoniously shoveled into his mouth. He looked like a man with nothing to live for, which was the opposite of why he was working this hard in the first place. It was not the Sean Krista knew and loved. The problem was, it wasn’t a stranger, either. It was the guy that would let her go, again. The one she was afraid of.

  “Hey,” Krista said as she walked toward the small table in the corner of the kitchen.

  Sean looked up and his eyes lit up. “Hey baby. How was your day?”

  Krista noticed he was eating a frozen dinner. It looked like a dog took a crap in a plastic tub. She went and sat on his lap, deciding she would make him some real food after she talked to him—small price to pay to seem like less of a bitch.

  He leaned back to welcome her choice of seat. As soon as her butt hit his legs Sean leaned into her and put his weary head to her chest. There was nothing remotely sexual about it. He wrapped her in his arms like he might a teddy bear, and sighed contentedly when she answered by putting her arms around him. He truly did love her, which made it all seem unrealistically unfair.

  “You saw me for a good chunk of the day. You remember—first you gave the happy news of Bob moving on, then you told us you weren’t planning to replace him, then you gave us a bunch more work to do.”

  “Oh yeah. That’s right. You are all doing so well. Things are really coming along.”

  “Sean, speaking of, I want us to go away. Take a Friday off and spend the weekend away in San Diego. We’ll surf, check out the zoo, and just hang out together. I need more of your time. And our company needs less. Far less. You are working way too hard. No one else in the company works this hard; the whole company—Tory included.”

  Sean leaned back and looked at her with bleary eyes. She got the feeling she just turned from a good guy to a bad guy. She wanted something and he didn’t have anything left to give.

  “When
?”

  “Well, you have a choice between the next four weekends. Any one of them.”

  Sean closed his eyes and shook his head. “I can’t, Krissy. I have so much to do.”

  “This isn’t a race, Sean. You need to live your life. Work to live, you know? Not live to work. You have someone that wants to spend time with you. That loves you. Work doesn’t love you. You are already kicking so much ass in so short a time—you don’t need to over-do it, you know?”

  “I know, Krista. I just hoped to get a little farther toward my goal before I slacked off.”

  “It isn’t slacking off Sean, it is being normal.”

  Sean sighed again. “Okay. Send me the dates and I’ll pick one. Will that make you happy?”

  “Not only will it make me happy, it will make you happy. Now, I’ll cook you something better to eat.”

  “The critic making the cook something to eat,” Sean said as he pushed away his half eaten frozen dinner.

  “I have a feeling that anything I make will taste better than what you have there.”

  “True words.”

  Sean fell asleep as Krista whipped up some baked chicken and a steamer bag of rice. It wasn’t much, but when she woke him up to eat it, he raved about how good it tasted. She wondered when about the last time he ate a real meal.

  That night, she pleasured him as he lay back on the bed with his hands behind his head. She started with a little tease, but when she saw his eyes start to droop, she sped things up.

  As soon as he finished, he had time to smile in relaxation before he drifted off to sleep. Krista turned off all the lights and curled up next to him. It was sad when your best efforts were nothing more than the effect of a glass of wine. This was no life they were living. This was a bookmark in the life they wished they had.