Colorado Heat (Colorado Heart Book 8)

by Sara York

  Grant stood and pulled him into a hug. “We’ll find a date. France isn’t hot and happening, right, Jazz?”

  “It’s quiet. They’ve calmed down. We don’t know why, but we have a month or more before we would have to make any critical decisions.”

  “Okay, let me rest and maybe take a few days, but then we’ll set up and talk about Duff,” Davis said.

  “That would be amazing. I know Duff would approve,” Marshal said.

  “He would,” Roger added.

  Everyone came up and hugged him before heading off to either the barn, their rooms, or another part of the house. He heard Grant tell Mike and Tanner to shower and then give their reports to Matthew. Life had to go on, and the ranch had to stay operational.

  He and Ryan headed to the barn where they saddled up two horses. Ryan had packed food, a blanket, and something to drink. They were going to head out to the mountain to sit and watch the clouds dance across the sky.

  He wasn’t happy, but he was satisfied. Duff had lived a good life. He’d made a difference in this world. Now Davis wanted to be like his dad. He wanted to follow in Duff’s footsteps, working to leave the world a better place.

  Chapter Eighteen

  “Hey,” Mike said behind him as he headed to his room.

  He turned, sad about Duff but thrilled about them. “Hey yourself.”

  “Um, when we go in to give the operation report, don’t say anything about us getting together.”

  Tanner felt like he’d been hit. “Why not?”

  “Babe, don’t get all upset. I just—it’s not anything about you and me. It’s Duff. He just died and I don’t want to—I need to—”

  “Hey,” Tanner cupped Mike’s cheek and moved in close, hugging him. “It’s okay.”

  “I just don’t want to worry Grant or Marshal. They have enough on their minds. Once a few days go past, we’ll go to Grant, Marshal, and Matthew and tell them. They’ll understand.”

  Mike was right. There was still some guilt, but Tanner agreed with Mike’s assessment. “When you explain it that way, I get it.”

  “Babe, I’m not ashamed of you, and I don’t want to hide you. I just don’t want to take the focus off Grant and Marshal taking care of Davis. This ranch needs them at the top of their game and they’re upset.”

  “I get that.”

  “So you know I’m not ashamed of anything we did.”

  He glanced down the hall before sliding his lips over Mike’s. “I want to hold you tonight.”

  “Don’t worry. We’ll find a way to be in the same bed.”

  “Good. We should probably shower separately though.”

  “Yeah, for now. Hey, I really enjoyed our time together,” Mike said.

  “So did I.” He headed into his bedroom, wishing he and Mike could shower together. Soon, they would be together and wouldn’t have to hide. Not that they were really hiding, they were just taking their time before telling everyone else. Too much had happened at the ranch. Losing Duff was unexpected.

  He had no doubts about this place. Even with Duff being gone, he still felt like he’d made the right decision.

  After a quick shower, he headed to the control room and found Matthew, Marshal, and Grant. He took a seat and began recounting the experience, leaving out the bit about him and Mike having sex. Grant and Marshal were distracted, and Matthew seemed a little off too.

  “After you left James and Brody’s place, did you see the burned down house?”

  “No, sir. The area is very uninhabited. If the building had still been smoking, the snow would have put it out. It was wet and cold for the first few hours, so it would have dampened anything still smoldering.”

  Grant turned to Matthew. “Do you feel confident with his details of the mission?”

  Matthew nodded. “I do. I’ll go over my notes and then can I ask more tomorrow if I find something needs more details?”

  “Sure. A more complex mission might need to be gone over a couple of times before we’re good with everything,” Grant said.

  “Okay, so, Tanner, I’m satisfied. I’ll send you a note tomorrow. Do you have any questions for me, Tanner?”

  “No, I don’t think so.”

  Tanner hesitated before he left the room. He felt unsettled. Guilt pulled at him. He should have told the guys about him and Mike. His stomach turned as he headed back to his room. He didn’t run into Mike, and he worried he’d made a critical error. Should he go back and tell Matthew he’d lied. Fuck, his first mission, and he’d already screwed up.

  Worry filled him. He had to do something to pass the time because he was going to freak out. The barn was empty, which he was thankful for. He spent an hour cleaning everything from the stalls to the tack room.

  Mike came in and found him. “Hey, how are you doing?”

  “I feel bad. I can’t do this. I can’t lie like this. It’s wrong.”

  “Tanner, it will be fine. Don’t sweat it. We’re going to eat dinner soon. Do you have much left to clean?”

  He gave his head a short shake. “No, I’m done.”

  “Okay, let’s head back to the house and we’ll eat.”

  Tanner still felt like he’d done something terribly wrong. Mike moved close, his nose gliding along the column of Tanner’s neck to his ear. He wrapped his arms around Tanner’s back before he started nibbling on his earlobe. It was too much, and he moved quickly, his lips sliding over Mike’s. The kiss went on, and he was about to tell Mike he needed more when he heard someone outside the tack room.

  Mike stepped away and shot him a sexy grin before he left the room. His heart melted and his head spun. The man mixed him up and twisted him tight.

  Later, after dinner, he was going to tell Mike they had to go back to Matthew, Marshal, and Grant and tell the truth about their relationship. They couldn’t hide it. Guilt filled him and made him nearly sick.

  Dinner was quiet. Suz, Billy, Tucker, and Roger had put together a great meal for everyone. Davis and Ryan took their food in their room and most everyone else ate quickly and took off. He headed to his room but Mike caught up with him.

  “Come to my room,” Mike whispered.

  “Sure.”

  The door closed and he was pushed up against the hard surface. Mike kissed him like he was water in a dry wasteland. The moan from Mike made his balls pull tight. He forgot about telling Matthew and the others, instead he tugged at Mike’s shirt, trying to get some skin on skin contact.

  Mike pulled his shirt off then attacked Tanner’s pants, pushing them low. They were naked in no time, both of them grabbing, touching, smoothing, and squeezing. He reached down and wrapped his fingers around Mike’s cock, loving the weight in his hand. He stroked down Mike’s dick and sighed. Their kiss ended and he caught Mike’s gaze and held it.

  “I need you,” Mike growled.

  “Yes,” he hissed.

  They tumbled to the bed, Mike lying on top. He let Mike stroke him and toy with him, taking pleasure in the feel of Mike’s touch. They were hot and heavy, about to get even more heavy when he lost control and came. It was over long before he was ready. He wanted more, but Mike made him so freaking hot.

  Mike sat up and stroked himself as Tanner watched. He loved seeing Mike toying with his nipples while he stroked himself. The desire to taste Mike won out and he sat up, licking over the tip of Mike’s cock.

  “Fuck, Tanner.”

  He opened his mouth and sucked in Mike, taking him deep. It was exciting, and Mike must have thought so too because he came hard, his fingers digging into Tanner’s shoulders. Eventually they would be able to last longer, but what Mike had said at the cabin was true, it was like they were teenagers.

  Mike bent low and kissed him, pushing him to the mattress before he lifted, his gaze drilling into Tanner’s. “You’re special.”

  “Babe, I feel so much for you.”

  “I know you’re worried.”

  “I am.”

  “Okay, we’ll tell them soon.”
/>
  “In the morning,” Tanner insisted.

  “The morning.”

  Tanner nodded once then pulled Mike down. They snuggled close and drifted off. He woke in a panic a few hours later, his head spinning as he thought of not telling Matthew what had happened. He slid out from under Mike’s hold and grabbed his clothes on the way out of the room.

  Though it was only midnight, he stopped to take a quick shower and dress before going to the kitchen. The coffee was already ground, water in the tank so he hit the button to start the first batch for the morning, or the last one for the day, depending on how you looked at it. The moon was bright. Illuminating the mountain and he stared up at it, wondering if he’d really convinced Mike to spill the beans.

  When the coffee pot beeped, he heard someone come into the room behind him. He turned and spied Mike.

  “Hey, I missed you.”

  “I couldn’t sleep.”

  “What’s up?”

  “We have to tell them.”

  “I know, I just—I couldn’t, not yesterday.”

  Tanner wiped his hand down his face. “I just can’t live with the guilt.”

  “We’ll tell.” Mike moved in close and brushed his lips over Tanner’s.

  “What’s going on?” Grant said.

  Tanner jumped back, fear racing through him. He turned around, his gaze meeting Grant’s. Anger shown in Grant’s eyes and he knew he’d fucked up.

  “I can—”

  Grant silenced him with a raised hand. “What is this, Mike? What the hell are you doing?”

  Mike’s nostrils flared and he squared his shoulders. He was about to open his mouth when Grant pointed outside.

  “The barn, Mike, I don’t want to wake everyone up. Tanner, you stay here, we’ll settle this with you later.”

  Fear filled him. He felt like he was choking. This was like with his dad. What would they do? He couldn’t deal with it. After a few seconds, he followed Mike and Grant who were already in the barn. He heard Grant say something about Mike being crazy.

  “Yeah,” Mike said. “I’m just using him. He’s a piece of ass until I can find someone more interesting.”

  Mike’s words sliced through Tanner. He turned around, booking it inside. How could he have trusted Mike? The man had been playing him the whole time. Fuck, everything about his life was a mistake.

  He hadn’t brought much to the ranch, and he wouldn’t take much with him. He filled his pack with a few MREs, a couple pair of jeans, a few shirts, his toiletries, and his underwear.

  He took off, heading to the edge of the property. For some crazy reason, he thought he could trust Mike. Hell, he thought he could have trusted Grant. Fuck, what would Grant have done?

  Memories of his dad killing those gay kids came back and he shuddered. No way could he deal with Mike after what he’d heard. The crushing words brought tears to his eyes. He’d been lied to. Mike didn’t want him. Fuck, he’d been used. Maybe he didn’t deserve anyone.

  He was miles away before he thought of Suz. She would be okay without him. She hadn’t really been in contact and didn’t need him. Hell, one thing the military had taught him was he didn’t need anyone. Why had he come to Wild Bluff and thought people would treat him differently?

  He walked until the sun turned the horizon lighter. His heart squeezed at the thought of never seeing Mike again, but there was no turning back. He’d get lost, finding a way to disappear somewhere in the world.

  He’d forgotten his phone, which was a blessing in some ways. He wasn’t sure which way he was going, but he would head towards the sunrise then keep going. There was no way he could live at Wild Bluff, not after what Mike had said about him.

  Chapter Nineteen

  Mike lifted his hands in the air and growled. “What do you think happened?”

  “You should have said something,” Grant barked.

  “We come home and find out Duff is dead. Are you kidding me? Us having sex didn’t change the mission. We were going to tell you, Matthew, and Marshal today. We just didn’t want to make things weird.”

  “Well, you’ve made them plenty weird now. I walked in on you two kissing. I freaked out.”

  “Really? You think?”

  “God, Mike, you’re such a bitch sometimes.”

  His lips twisted and he lifted his brows. “At least you got one thing right. I can’t believe you actually thought I was using him.”

  “Well, look at your history.”

  “What, just because I’ve fucked around in Colorado Springs and Denver—”

  “That’s not what I’m talking about. Not too long ago you told me you would never get involved. You have said over and over again you didn’t want anyone, as in no one. What are you going to do with Tanner? He’s here for good. He’s a team member.”

  Mike rubbed his jaw. “I get it, Grant. Trust me, I see the irony.”

  “Do you?”

  “Oh yeah, I see it. I’ve fallen for this guy. I’ve fallen hard.”

  “Mike? Are you really ready for a commitment?”

  “Yeah, Grant, I am.”

  “Okay, then you’re going to have to work hard. Roger and I have to work at our relationship. We have this love affair, then I’m his leader, and he’s got a leadership role here at the ranch at times. It’s tough. Add to it the age difference. He’s twelve years younger than you. Mike, you’re going to have to really want it for it to work.”

  “I do. Grant, I swear, I’m going to work hard to make this right between us.”

  Grant ran his hand over his face and blew out a breath. “Okay, I need to talk to him.”

  “Sure. Let’s go get him.”

  They left the barn and headed inside. The kitchen was empty so Mike headed to his room and found it empty. He moved to Tanner’s door and knocked softly. There wasn’t any answer. He knocked again, this time a little harder.

  Panic made his throat close. He put his hand on the knob and turned it. Tanner wasn’t on the bed so he headed to the bathroom and found it empty. Fuck, where was he?

  Mike made his way to the kitchen and ran into Billy. “Hey, why are you up?” Billy rubbed his eyes and yawned.

  “Nothing.” Mike spit out. “Go back to bed.”

  Billy moaned and stretched. Mike continued on to the kitchen where he found Grant staring at the mountain.

  “He’s not there.”

  “What do you mean, he’s not there?”

  Someone bumped into him and he turned, finding Billy. “Who’s not here?”

  Mike drew in a slow breath. He didn’t want this to be a big deal. Before, when he’d not had anyone, he could keep his life, his stupidity hidden. But now everyone would find out. He put his hands on the sides of his head and rubbed his temples.

  “Fuck, Grant, what am I going to do?”

  Billy moved to stand in front of Mike. “What do you need?”

  He shook his head. “I can’t have everyone know.”

  Billy turned to Grant and lifted his brows. “What is he talking about?”

  “Mike likes to keep things private, we all know he does. He and Tanner got together. I walked in on them and I guess—I don’t know, maybe I was a little harsh.”

  “Fuck,” Mike said. “We can’t wake everyone.”

  “You need to wake Suz,” Billy said.

  “No. I can’t. My God, her brother. She’ll…I don’t know what she’ll do but it will be bad.” Mike was out of his mind with worry. He needed Tanner.

  Billy shook his head. “She knows him best. Did you check the control room?”

  He groaned heading to the control room. Grant and Billy followed. It was empty. Then they checked all the other places in the house before going outside to check around the pens. Tanner wasn’t anywhere.

  Billy reached for Mike and squeezed his shoulder. “Have you called him?”

  “No.”

  Grant pulled out his phone and dialed. Waiting for Grant to say something sucked. “Nothing.”

  “F
uck,” Mike said.

  Billy lifted his brows and his lips thinned. “Go wake up Suz.”

  Mike looked to Grant who shook his head. “You have no choice. You need to wake her and deal with the consequences of your actions.”

  “Fine.” Mike headed to Suz’s room, rapping on the door quietly. After the second set of knocks, she cracked open the door and narrowed her eyes. “Get dressed, we need you in the kitchen.”

  She rolled her eyes and shut the door. He waited for her, which wasn’t long, and they silently headed to the kitchen. Grant had poured up coffee and Billy had a mug too.

  Suz shrugged and got a mug, plopping down in the chair next to Billy. “You better have a good reason to wake me.”

  “I fucked up,” Mike said.

  “How?” Suz asked.

  Mike looked to Grant as panic raced through him. He’d really done it. Lying was bad, but he’d done something to push Tanner to leave.

  “Tell her everything,” Grant said.

  Mike blew out a breath. “Okay, so when we were in Canada, we had sex.”

  “Just one time?” Suz asked.

  “No. And it wasn’t just sex. We connected like I’ve never connected with anyone. We want to be together.”

  Suz shrugged. “So what’s the problem?”

  “We didn’t tell anyone. So yesterday when we broke down the mission, I asked Tanner not to say anything. That was my mistake, and I accept I screwed up. Anyway, this morning, well, it’s not really morning—”

  “It’s well after two, so it’s morning,” Suz said.

  “Grant found us kissing and he got pissed,” Mike said.

  Suz turned to Grant. “You got pissed about my brother kissing another man?”

  “No, not them kissing, but I guess it may have come off that way to Tanner. I was pissed because—”