Handfuls of Shattered Pieces

by Kerry Taylor

  “Thank you. It looks delicious.” I reached for the spoon and took a large serving for me from the bowl. Kade had a big bowl of rice and he placed a portion on my plate too.

  “You need to eat more.” He whispered as he did it and I didn’t disagree, so didn’t argue.

  “How’s your foot feeling Honey?” Keira asked as she looked across at me.

  “It’s fine. I forgot about it to be honest.” And I had. It was like I had thought earlier, a small injury like that was nothing to me after what I had endured.

  “Xander said you could take more painkillers by now if you need to.” Kyle offered. I looked up to him with a smile and shook my head.

  “Really, I’m fine. It doesn’t hurt, but thanks.”

  “Kade told us what you did this afternoon Olivia. It was really brave of you, and we are so proud of you.” Grant said as both he and Keira looked to me with a mix of worry and relief.

  “I couldn’t have done it without the guys.” I replied shyly, not used to, or sure how to accept their praise. It had been so long since anyone cared about anything I did.

  “What’d she do?” Evie asked, her mouth filled with food as she spoke.

  “Olivia told Kade some very hard to talk about information, to help him catch a bad man. She was super brave.” Keira explained.

  “About the man who hurt you?” Evie asked, shocking me. I looked at her with my mouth wide open, not knowing what to say. I hadn’t told her anyone had hurt me, I knew I didn’t.

  “She’s gots those lines on her back like Matt. I saw them last night while she was sleeping. A bad man hurt Matt, I heard Cole and him talking ‘bout it, and Livia has the same.” She explained with a shrug, then carried on eating.

  “Evie, for a start you should not be listening to your brother’s private conversations.” Keira said, slightly raising her voice. “And you should definitely not be sneaking in to spy on Olivia while she’s sleeping. She would have been very startled if she woke and found you stood there, wouldn’t she?”

  I looked across to Matt who was concentrating way too hard on his food. He had scars on his back too? I wondered if Evie meant the knife lines or the lines from the belt? Maybe both? I wondered again what had happened to Matt. I wanted to ask him, to know if he really had been through something similar to me, but I wouldn’t risk upsetting him.

  “Sorry Livia. I won’t come into your room again without knocking, ok?” Evie said, snapping my attention back to her.

  “It’s ok sweetie, but thank you for apologising.” I said as I forced a smile for her. She nodded and happily went back to eating her meal.

  Keira caught my eye and I knew she was worried Evie had upset me, so I smiled for her too and went back to moving food around my plate. I had eaten a little, and it was really good, but there was no way I could fit any more in.

  After dinner everyone went to the media room to watch a movie together. Kade left, promising if they caught the killer the next day in the trap they had set up for 10.02 AM, the time listed on the letter I deciphered, he would try to meet the rest of us for a late lunch while we were out shopping.

  I walked him to the door and briefly hugged him before he left, then he was gone, the door closed and locked behind him. I stood for a moment, trying to process how lost I felt without him. I knew it was stupid, I barely knew him, but it had been so good to have the four of them together, so right. Now he was gone, it was like a piece was missing.

  Needing comfort and not wanting Kyle to come looking for me, I took a deep breath and headed toward the media room. I snuggled on the sofa in a space between Matt and Cole and got comfortable to watch the movie, the whole time completely confused, but also wonderfully happy about the way I felt when the guys were near.

  ***

  This was such a stupid idea. We were in a mall, a huge freaking mall, crammed full with people and noise and bright lights. We’d been there ten minutes and I was a shaking mess, feeling way too hot and badly nauseous.

  I was just so scared. The people surrounding me on all sides were more than I could handle, all of the noise and talking and laughing. Music was being pumped in above me and mixed with the music from the stores it was too much and way too loud.

  My head snapped around to check the large group behind me for his face. I felt so sure he would be there somewhere, ready to grab me. It would be so easy for him in this chaos too. I wouldn’t go back, I wouldn’t!

  “Hey, you ok?” I looked up to my right hand side where Cole stood and realised I was digging my hands into the flesh of his hand which I was holding like my only lifeline. Matt was on my left and Kyle was in front, shoving people out of the way for me to get through.

  “Fine.” I agreed with much too vehement of a nod as I made myself release him a little.

  “I got you Beautiful. You’re safe.” He whispered right into my ear as he pulled me tight into his side and wrapped his arm securely over my shoulders.

  I nodded once and smiled shyly, suddenly very hot with all of his attention on me.

  We went into several big outfitters and I was talked into buying a long grey puffer coat with a huge padded collar that would zip right up, covering me from knees to chin. I also got gloves and a black beanie much like Kyles, which I had been borrowing, and loved.

  Kyle insisted I get a pair of watertight boots for when it snowed and I bought more jeans and sweaters too. It was way more than I needed, but it had been nice to pick things I wanted. Even before I was taken, we had never had enough money to just buy whatever we wanted. Every purchase had always been carefully planned and usually came from the sale rails.

  As we left another clothes store, all three guys loaded with bags they would not let me help carry, I looked into the busy walkway with trepidation. I was getting better with being there, but I still expected The Shadow to be lurking in wait for me at every turn.

  “That was Kade. He’ll be here in thirty for lunch.” Kyle said as he pocketed his cell and walked over to where we all waited for him.

  “Did they catch him?” I asked eagerly, hoping the killer had been stopped that morning.

  “He didn’t say.” Kyle shrugged. I nodded, then turned to check behind me when I heard a deep voice too close. By the time I whipped my head around Cole was behind me, a human shield from the rest of the world and I smiled up at him gratefully.

  “We should head to the food court and grab a table.” Matt suggested, but I wasn’t listening. When I had looked back to Cole, the store next door had caught my eye and I was transfixed. I started to wander over, the guys all following behind me.

  I stopped before the window and just stared at the beautiful baby grand piano displayed before me. It had been so long since I saw one and I instantly felt the need to touch the keys.

  “You play Princess?” Kyle asked as he walked up beside me and looked too.

  “I used to. My Dad was a music teacher and he had me banging the keys before I could walk.” I explained , unable to take my eyes from the instrument before me. All I could see was my Dad, at the piano much like that one, which used to sit in the corner of our lounge. He was always at his happiest when he sat at that thing, and I was coming to understand why, since by the age of nine the piano was my happy place too.

  “Let’s go in.” Cole said, and before I knew it he grabbed my hand and dragged me into the large music shop. It was filled with instruments of all types, and racks filled with sheet music.

  “Hi. You guys looking for anything in particular?” A young guy asked as he approached. He wore jeans and a t-shirt with the store’s logo on the pocket.

  “We’re thinking about a piano. Olivia here plays.” Cole explained as he pointed down to me and the guy’s eyes lit up. I blushed furiously as I realised he thought he was getting a huge sale out of us. We were not buying a piano though.

  “This way.” The guy said as he led us excitedly through the shop and to the back corner where he had six models on display, including a ten thousand dollar grand pi
ano. I looked around in awe and excitement as the salesman started trying with everything he had to sell us something.

  “Could we just get some time to have a look around?” Kyle snapped after a few minutes, obviously bored with the overzealous assistant.

  “Oh sure. Try them out. They’re all tuned. I’ll be out front when you’re ready.” And with that the assistant scurried off, probably alarmed by Kyle’s growling.

  “You guys made him think we’re buying one!” I hissed as soon as he was gone.

  “We might.” Matt said with a smile and I assumed he was joking.

  “Will you play one for us Princess?” Kyle asked.

  “I don’t know. It’s been so long I probably forgot, a-and I wasn’t exactly good anyway. I was only nine.” I explained, but I was desperate to sit and feel the cool keys beneath my fingers. Before the guys even tried to push me further I was moving to the small baby grand that reminded me most of my Dads. It was all black gloss, so shiny and inviting.

  Before I could process I was sat on the stool, lifting the keylid. I put my hands on the keys and felt this rush of familiarity that had been so lacking. I pressed a few notes, just getting a feel and trying to settle back into that place I used to disappear into when I played the complicated pieces of music my father had taught me.

  The piece that I started to play had always been one of my favourites, and one of the first full pieces I learnt. ‘To a Wild Rose’ reminded me of long summer days, and of wonderful, happy times. The notes just came to me as if I had never been away from my Dad’s piano. I played it all of the way through, not a note forgotten. The movements of my fingers were automatic and smooth, and the feeling of contentment overtook me completely as I became swept up in the slow, happy tune.

  When I was finished I was breathing heavily, as though I’d done a work out and I felt overcome with emotion. It was the closest I had felt to my Dad since the day I left him and I missed him so damned much.

  “That was awesome Brains. You’re brilliant!” Cole declared. I looked up to him with a watery smile and a second later found myself engulfed in his arms.

  “Why did it make you cry?” He asked, as though he’d slay the piano if he found out it had upset me in any way.

  “It just made me think of my Dad. I miss him, that’s all.” I whimpered as I fought to hold back more tears.

  “He must have been very talented if he taught you to play like that by the time you were nine years old.” Kyle said from somewhere behind me. I felt his warm hand on my back, rubbing soothing circles.

  I nodded, too emotional to go into just how amazing my dad had been,

  “Come on. Let’s go find Kade and get some food.” Matt suggested. I nodded again and happily tucked myself against Cole as we left the shop before the assistant could accost us further.

  It was less terrifying to move through that crowded place when I was holding onto Cole and wrapped under his arm. People dove out of his way, clearly intimidated by his huge six and half foot height and heavily muscled frame. To me it was all quite amusing really, since Cole was far from the scariest of the guys. He was actually the most easy going and light hearted, a real teddy bear if you knew him. Still, I felt safe with him at my side.

  Kade was standing, looking sexy as hell, leant against the wall at the entrance to the food court, one foot propped up behind him on the wall, and his arms crossed over his broad chest. He was in jeans and his leather jacket, as always, but this time he had a black button down underneath and it suited him perfectly, just the right mix of sexy and dangerous.

  As soon as we neared him I jumped forward and was instantly accepted into his arms. I hadn’t seen him since the night before and I had missed him. I had also been worried sick about him dealing with the serial killer that morning, and was so relieved to find him in one piece.

  “Miss me, Love?” He asked in his deep rumble, a laugh behind his words.

  “Yes, I did.” I replied honestly. “Are you ok? Did he show up?”

  “I’m fine, but he never showed. We think something spooked him. Maybe he saw one of our guys staking the place out or something.” He explained with a shrug. I stepped back and looked up at him.

  “Was it me? Was my math wrong?” I asked nervously. If someone died because I got the date, time and place wrong I wasn’t sure I’d be able to handle it.

  “No love. Your math was spot on. You worked out the time and GPS coordinates of the first two without knowing about either of them. You were right. It was us that screwed this up somehow. We’ll fix it. Don’t worry.”

  “Come on. Let’s find a table. Livy’s worn out.” Kyle beckoned, as he started towards a crowded seating area. All of the tables were packed and the conversations around us seemed deafening. I stopped moving, not able to go any further into the chaos. Kade stepped into me and grabbed my shoulders to steady me as he got his feet under him.

  “What’s wrong?” He asked close to my ear.

  “I can’t. I’m sorry. It’s too much…...too loud.” I admitted, embarrassed. He nodded and pulled me around so my face was hidden against his chest. He covered my ears, then made a high whistle. When I looked up confused, all of the guys had heard him and were hurrying back toward us.

  “We’re going to Ricci’s instead. It’s too crowded and noisy in here for Livy.” He told them when they surrounded us, and no one said a word in argument.

  Tucked tight against Kade, I followed them all down some stairs and out of the mall. We walked two blocks over to a strip of small bars and restaurants and Kade led me into a tiny little Italian bistro called ‘Ricci’s’.

  Inside it was quiet, with very low background music and just a couple of small tables occupied. The restaurant was small, but bright and spaced well, so it didn’t feel crowded.

  “This ok, Love?” Kade asked me quietly as I stood in the entrance taking it all in.

  I nodded and smiled, making him smile too. He looked so handsome when he smiled, and so much less dangerous, not that dangerous Kade wasn’t handsome too.

  A waitress greeted us, and I didn’t miss the way she checked out everyone of my guys. My guys? The guys, I meant the guys!

  As she led us to a large booth in the back I saw the way she pushed her chest out and swung her hips with extra sway. Who could blame her? They were all beautiful and she was definitely an attractive girl, around my age with curly blonde hair and wide ice grey eyes.

  We all sat, me wedged at the back between Kade and Kyle and Cole and Matt on the two ends.

  As we ordered drinks she kept on flicking those fluttering eyes back to me, studying me hard. I wondered if she was mad I was with the guys, and by the time I needed to tell her my order I was too nervous about her staring to get a choice out. I looked across to Matt pleadingly, knowing as always, he would understand I was struggling.

  “You want a coke? You like Coke right?” He offered and I nodded, not caring what I was brought.

  “A coke, and bring us some water for the table too please.” Matt said flatly, not one of them returning her flirts since we walked in.

  “You ok?” Matt asked once she walked away.

  “Yeah. Sorry…..I just panicked.” I didn’t want them to know she had freaked me out with a few, too long looks. It was silly.

  “It’s ok. You’re doing really well today. It must all be so overwhelming.” He kindly told me. I smiled, grateful he understood, as always.

  “Take a look at the menu and choose what you want to eat, then I can order it for you when she comes.” Cole suggested and I nodded eagerly, not wanting to speak to the waitress or look stupid in front of her again.

  By the time she returned with drinks I already picked what I wanted, lasagne like my Mom used to make, and the guys didn’t even need to look, obviously regulars in that place.

  As the guys all gave her their order her gaze alternated between writing the order and staring way too hard at me. By the time she got to Cole, on the end, I was shaking with nerves, wondering what
I had done to make her stare so much?

  “I’ll take the 15oz steak with salad and fries and we’ll have a lasagne al forno too.” Cole said as I tried hard to look anywhere but at her, glaring at me.

  “You want fries or salad with that?” She asked, looking over to me.

  “Olivia?” Cole asked. I took a deep breath and looked right at her, refusing to continue being foolish. It wasn’t like she could hurt me. She couldn’t get past one of the guys, never mind all four.

  “Salad please.” I said, but she didn’t catch it. She squealed over me, scaring me badly.

  “OH MY GOD!” She declared at the top of her voice, making everyone in the place look. I grabbed onto Kyle’s thigh, the closest thing to me, and dug my nails into his denim. He and Kade had already shuffled to the front of their seats and pushed me back so they were partly blocking me on each side.

  “It is you!” She declared. “I thought it was, but it couldn’t be right? Olivia! You’ve been missing for years. Everyone said you were dead!” She laughed, like that was funny. I felt sick, my other hand now trying to steady my swaying body against Kade’s back.

  “You wanna lower your voice an octave?” Cole growled angrily, but she just ignored him and carried on.

  “You were the grade below me at elementary school. Remember, Kelly Barnes?” I totally did not remember, but I was too out of it to answer anyway. “Anyway, what happened? Were you kidnapped by a pedo? That’s what my dad said happened, but there were stories you were like sex trafficked to Mexico?”

  “Kelly! That’s enough. Take our order to the kitchen and tell Ricci it’s for Kade Maxwell. We’ll need it to take out now, ASAP.” Kade’s voice was a low rumble, not to be messed with and lucky for Kelly, whoever the hell she was, she got that and ran off to the back of the restaurant without another word.

  “Princess, it’s ok. She’s gone now. Take a nice deep breath for me.” Kyle instructed as he appeared in my line of vision.

  I didn’t even realise how badly I was gasping and swaying around until he was there, holding me steady with his hands holding the top of my arms. Everything around me seemed to be swaying and I was sure I would throw up.