Crissy Chance

by Douglas E Roff

  “It goes both ways you know. It always has. I’m not always so sure of everything I do or think; sometimes I feel adrift, friendless in the world. A shit family, betrayals by those I have loved. I need a rock, a giant boulder, my true North Star. That’s who you are. That is what you are to me. If I don’t have your love, what do I have? Things? Money? They pale in comparison to one single day with you.”

  Serena looked at the couple. “Well, session over. Get the fuck out of my office. I’m busy. Go get your own lunch.”

  Adam flipped her off.

  “Now go home and talk this over. No more fears and anxiety. Have a fight. Do whatever. But if you feel something, good or bad, be honest and say so. You Adam are the worst; you assume everyone knows what you’re thinking. We don’t. Yes, I know you believe in action rather than words, but try doing both. And you Noki, you must learn to trust this moron. Make him understand. Even if you have to be blunt. He doesn’t mind. He thinks way too much anyway, then overthinks it again. Get a baseball bat if you must. Now go!”

  ***

  Hanford arrived with the limo and waited for them to climb in the back. He watched what they were doing; they were unusually quiet.

  “Everything OK?”

  “It is now. I think I was an idiot before. I’m not very good with a lot of human being things.”

  “Permission to speak freely?”

  “Of course.”

  “You’re a moron. The only person on the planet who doesn’t see how much you love each other is you. Hell, even I’ve known that from the beginning. I see the way you look at her and smile. You never smile otherwise. Wake up.”

  He paused.

  “And you missy, you too. I don’t know anything about your relationship, and it’s none of my business, but he loves you and you love him. Stop acting like you just met over coffee and are on your second date. He’s a mess but he was a lot worse before you. He’s a better man now; that’s because of you. We’re here. Now go up and start your new life. You both deserve happiness. I’m done.”

  ***

  When they went upstairs and were alone, Adam walked Noki over to the couch. He sat down, reclined against one end, his favorite down pillow soft against his back; he wore a slight scowl on his face. Noki edged up close to him, tears glistening in the corner of her eyes, with a half expectant, half sad look on her face.

  “I’m a little annoyed with you Nocera Lee, especially after today in the doctor’s office. I’m not sure what to do about it.”

  “Please don’t be angry with me. I didn’t know what else to do. I was desperate. I was afraid you didn’t want me in your life any more.”

  “This is serious, so we should talk. I’ll go first so we are clear on what will happen next. What you must do in the future.”

  Noki’s aspect grew even more uncomfortable; she squirmed and braced herself for bad news.

  Suddenly Adam laughed. “Jeez girl, you got me in trouble with Mom! Now I’m in Dutch with her and she’ll be cursing me out for a week. Next time don’t rat me out. I love you.”

  Noki fairly flew into his arms, a wave of relief coming over her and still crying from the emotional exhaustion of the day.

  “I thought you were going to make me leave.”

  “Make you leave? As if. Not in a million years. Who’d put up with me?”

  “Nobody. You’re mean and well … you’re mean.”

  “I know. I suck at loving you but I swear I’m trying to change my ways. I’ll do better so you never ever doubt me again. I’m getting better, a little better each day. But I need your help too. Can’t do this alone or I’ll backslide into old habits. You need to keep me on the path; in line and teach me what I don’t know. Can you do that?”

  “Yes. No. Maybe. But no more mean tricks and fooling me. I take everything you say seriously and I love you. I hear everything you tell me; I trust you. You take advantage of my trusting soul.”

  “I know. That’s why it’s so much fun!”

  “No, it isn’t. It’s mean.”

  Noki smiled, dried her eyes knowing her Adam was back. Then she pounded him, not too hard, on the chest. “Don’t you dare ever do that again.”

  “OK. Maybe once on my birthday? Christmas? April Fools?”

  “No. Never. It scares me. I think you’re mad at me and I don’t like it when you are.”

  “When was the last time I was mad at you? Raised my voice? Gave you a proper spanking?”

  “Never. Does thinking about it count?”

  “No. Only real stuff that actually made you feel bad.”

  “Never.”

  “And I never will. I will, if possible, stop acting like a ten-year old.”

  “Seven.”

  “OK, seven-year old. And I will always be serious and stern. No more ‘silly me’.”

  “I didn’t say that. I want silly, sweet, kind you. But sometimes I …”

  “Tell me.”

  “I think you’re not listening to me. You don’t hear what I’m trying to say.”

  “I hear everything you say. I do.”

  “No, I mean hear me. Not just the words, but what they mean. Really understand me. I want to tell you things, hard things for me to say, but you don’t always hear what I’m trying to say.

  “I … you should always make me hear, even if it seems mean at the time. You aren’t mean but I can get distracted by just about anything. Be blunt; I don’t mind, you know that. I’m dense. You mean everything to me. I want to know how you feel; what you want to share. I have loved you ever since the day we met.

  “Do you really, really ‘cross your heart and hope to die’ love me?”

  “You know I do. I mean I really, really do. You’re the only woman I ever think about. When was the last time I had a date? Or a girlfriend – never. You’re all I want. Even if we never …”

  “I know. But I want to. I want to see what it would be like, you know, if we just tried it. If its not right, we’re still best friends. And I want you to be happy; if that means you bring your trollops into our home, I promise not to kill them right away. But only if you hate me in bed and then I get to choose the right recruits for you; the ones who will love you for you. Like I do.”

  “Deal! We experiment, and if I fail in your expectations, if I suck at pleasuring you, then I put you in charge of my love life. And then you’ll need to recruit for me.”

  “Your pimp, huh. Don’t worry, I know just what to do.”

  “Gonna share your plan?”

  “Nope surprises. Good surprises; the kind you’ll like. And I have ideas, but one step at a time. I want us to be happy and perfect. I know we can do this.”

  “And I have two surprises for you to celebrate your recovery.”

  “Are they surprisey?”

  “Is that a word?”

  “Our word now.”

  “I have a little demonstration for you later when we … you know.”

  “Have mad sex?”

  “Yes that.”

  “What else?”

  “I bought an island for us. Our new hideaway. Noki’s Island.”

  Chapter 5

  Present day, Noki’s Island retreat.

  Noki was unlikely to be awake sufficiently for the late-night bedtime recreation she had discussed with Adam earlier in the evening. It was not for lack of desire, but as they watched their favorite British TV shows that evening, Noki curled up next to Adam like a cat, and put her head down in his lap, feather pillow for comfort. Whenever that happened, ‘sleepy Noki’ took over and would soon afterward be ‘night-night Noki’. Adam did not mind; he could wait. He loved her just being in his home and in his life 24/7/365, so if there was no playtime tonight, maybe there would be tomorrow.

  Their tastes in partnering gender were the same, so that caused a little awkwardness from time to time with mutual friends, but they had figured out a way to be satisfied with their three-year arrangement. Adam was happy with the current iteration of his girl, ‘Noki 2.0’, the
girl pimp, so when Noki was ready she would explain her plans for him. Previous failed gender experiments notwithstanding, he always enjoyed her schemes and he was never “underserved” as she often reminded him. But, if things weren’t erotically blissful between them, she would begin searching for his next date. But, as she recently told him, staffing the enterprise was not ready quite yet. Noki needed to test the “Adam waters” first.

  She told him she would discuss some resumes with him in the next few days if their own experiment was a bust.

  He was just about to carry his eighty-five-pound girlfriend into the bedroom and put her under the covers when his Sat phone rang, and rather loudly. It was late, after eleven, and his last TV show was just winding down; he would either stay up for a while afterwards and do some late-night work, or maybe join Noki in slumberland.

  After the phone rang, Noki would either still be dead to the world or pretending to be so. She was a very snoopy girl who knew how to manage her boyfriend and all of his odd habits; that included feigning sleep when she was wide awake. One eye popped open as Adam walked over to the table where his Sat phone rested. Only a very small circle of friends had his number, and it was only for serious emergency use. Noki was well aware that he had secrets, secrets he said he would one day share in toto with her.

  One big secret was going to be revealed soon and she could not have been more excited in anticipation of it. His secrets were always juicy and she was captivated by the way he crafted his stories about them. Not all were happy; but all were worth the wait and the retelling.

  He clicked on.

  “Hello?”

  “Well, hello there to you, stranger. I hoped you were still awake.”

  “Let’s start with who you are and how you got this number. This is a private line and I don’t know you.”

  “You certainly do, silly. It’s me. Crissy. Remember, Crissy Chance from Barrows Boring Bay?”

  “Yeah, sure. I remember you. Now what do you want and make it quick? I’m busy and about to go to bed. And start with how you got this number?”

  Adam’s tone was unfriendly with whomever he was speaking, so Noki’s interest was naturally on high alert. Old acquaintance? Business partner? Ex-girlfriend? She was suddenly wide awake.

  “Why so hostile, Adam luv? It never used to be that way.”

  “That was a long time ago and things have changed.”

  “Miss me?”

  “Not in the least. Now, who gave you this number?”

  “You know very well who did. Your Mom, of course. Anna loves me and so does your Dad. Why are you being so nasty? It’s not like you.”

  Adam saw his girlfriend was wide-awake, peaking around the end of the couch.

  “Hang on, I need to sit down and put you on speaker. That I’m tired and still talking to you is more exhausting than I could ever have imagined.”

  Adam walked over to the couch, put the phone on the coffee table and clicked on speaker. He put his index finger to his lips, signalling for Noki to listen but not speak. He intended to make this call brief.

  “So first off please convey to dear old mum and dad to go fuck themselves. This phone was only for them and family, and only for emergencies. You’re not family so why are you calling?”

  “We need to speak. And the hostility and tone aren’t helping. Now listen up.”

  Adam hung up.

  “Who’s she?”

  “Crissy Chance. Old school chum from Barrows Bay. My parents just adore her. They wished they’d had her instead of me. They can have her and vice versa.”

  “Doesn’t sound like an old friend.”

  “Ex-friend.”

  The phone rang. It was Crissy.

  “What the fuck is your problem. I said we need to speak.”

  “Are Edward and Anna OK?”

  “Yes.”

  “Maria, Agustin, Rod, Cindy and Misti?”

  “Yes.”

  “The girls?”

  “Yes.”

  “Then we don’t need to speak.”

  Adam hung up again.

  Noki asked, “What up, dog? Never seen you agitated like this before.”

  “When I left for Cal Tech, Crissy left for NYU. We were close in high school. I was not close to my own parents, but I was extremely close to my friends’ parents, Maria and Agustin Suarez. Rod and Misti are their kids, and Rod’s wife Cindy was part of our group. Thick as thieves. We always got in trouble and Cindy always bailed us out. Her Dad, Mark, another cocksucker, was the town Constable. RCMP.”

  “Go on.”

  “I thought Crissy and I were close, and we were, but after she left Barrows Bay, I never heard from her. Sent birthday and Christmas cards, emailed, practically sent smoke signals. Nada. Turns out the little shit was snuggling up to my parents, who happened to be funding her entire education, living expenses and travel. Every summer she was with them. Crissy did this, Crissy did that, isn’t Crissy wonderful. I was building a major corporation at age twenty but that was small change. Crissy became a lawyer. Isn’t Crissy wonderful, a lawyer in the family. Yeah, we need more lawyers like we need more cockroaches. Then she specializes in Tax, gets an advanced degree, called an LL.M., and the cycle starts all over again. Never a word to me, even though I do top secret DOD and DARPA contracts, am a billionaire by age twenty-six. But nope. Hardly a whisper. I’m on the cover of Journals, get into the papers regularly, but no, that gets no attention. Just Crissy fucking Chance. Supergirl, superstar lawyer with a huge and highly respected New York City law firm. Which, incidentally, she gets through my Dad and guess what? All their legal business goes to her at the new firm. She’s fresh out of Law School but now she’s a Partner at a four hundred lawyer paper mill.”

  “You’re very angry.”

  “I am. I never got anything but criticism from mommy and daddy, and could never somehow make them proud. If I didn’t do things right or fast enough, I was punished. When I learned martial arts, which I never wanted to do anyway, if I wasn’t progressing fast enough, daddy would take me to the gym and beat the shit out of me, then just leave me there. Suffice it to say, we’re not close. We haven’t spoken in years; ditto with Crissy. They only get in touch when they need something. They never call themselves; they get my sis or brother to call for them. Or Cindy.”

  “Sis and brother?”

  “Misti and Rod. We’re family. My Mom and Dad are not. And Crissy, sure as shootin’, is nothing to me. They can go …”

  The phone rang again.”

  “I said don’t call!”

  “It isn’t Crissy, it’s me son, your father. Your Mother is here too on speaker. That was rude the way you spoke to Crissy. You need to talk to her and apologize. Immediately!”

  “Let’s be clear here Daddy dearest and you too Mommy. I don’t give a fuck what you think, I don’t live under your roof or under your fucking rules, so back the fucking attitude way off. Never, I mean never, call me again. And keep your lawyer/daughter away from me too. If I haven’t been clear, fuck …you …both. And don’t ever, and I mean ever, tell me what to do again. As far as I’m concerned, you’re both dead to me.”

  Adam hung up again.

  “Yikes, Adam. Sweetie. Let me make us some tea. You’re a little … wound up. Maybe a back rub?”

  “I’m not mad at you; I just have a lot of hostility in me. Everyone I know had great parents and I got stuck with two assholes. Just not fair.”

  “We have something in common, I guess.”

  “We’re both hot, rich and incredibly brilliant?”

  “Just what I was thinking too.”

  ***

  Noki and Adam were sharing a tea that Noki loved and since she loved it, so did he. It was an hour later, and the Sat phone rang again.

  “Yes? What now?” His tone was defiant and decidedly unfriendly.

  “It’s me, your little sis. Don’t get all crazy; I just wanted to see if you were OK? Are you?”

  “No. As a matter of fact, I’m not. Bett
er, though, now that I know it’s you.”

  “Mom and Dad?”

  “Mine, not yours. How are yours?”

  “Fine. They miss you.”

  “I call Mom twice a week and Pops almost every day. They are not missing me. Why are you really calling?”

  “You gonna yell?”

  “No. I love you and Rod and Cindy and the girls. You’re my only family along with my new girlfriend and part-time financial advisor, Noki Lee. We’ve been living together for a couple of years now, and, yes, it’s serious. Don’t you dare tell them, though. Our Mom and Pops if you want, but the other vipers, no.”

  “Will do. Or, I guess, will don’t. They’ll find out anyway. It’ll work its way to Mark, then he’ll call your Dad. Bad ju-ju.”

  “Well, next time I see Mark I’ll give him the same beating I used to get from him, Cindy’s Dad or not. If you see him, tell him we have a date.”

  “You going to introduce me?”

  “Sorry sis; Nocera Lee, meet my sis, Misti Suarez.”

  They exchanged pleasantries, and promised to get together, just probably not in Barrows Bay.

  Misti said, “There’s got to be a good story. It was a secret for a while that you two were an item, but not totally. You guys made into the papers in New York City. Some charity thing. You-know-who saw it and ratted you out.”

  “That’s OK. As long as they keep their distance, I’m good. As for the story, Noki was a high paid assassin; I was her target. We kissed, and now we’re almost married. End of story.”

  “I call bullshit!”

  “Nope, absolutely true. Most of it anyway.”

  “Now for sure I’m coming to visit and right away. When and where, bro? New York?”

  Adam said, “When is anytime and where is a secret. I’ll send my plane.”