by Sienna Parks
Rae runs into my arms, her soft little hands tangling in my hair. “A.B.! Did you do wats of docor stuffs today?”
“I sure did. What have you been doing, sweetheart?”
“Uncle Jax and me have been brushing my dolly’s hair. And we made cookies. Do you want one?” She wriggles out of my arms before I have a chance to answer, making a run for the kitchen. Jax shouts after her.
“Why don’t you take one to Pops? I’m sure he’s hungry.”
“Okay!” She disappears singing something about chocolate chips as she goes. It’s adorable.
“Can we talk for a minute?” Jax’s tone is sobering.
“Sure. What’s up?”
“Has Maddox mentioned anything to you about Samantha?” My heart begins to race. Does he know what I have planned?
“We’ve spoken about his decision to keep her away from Rae. Why? What has he said to you?”
“Nothing new. I just feel like he’s really struggling with this. Like he thinks it’s his fault if she doesn’t get a new kidney. He was saying something about getting himself tested to see if he could do it, to ensure she doesn’t come after Rae again. I don’t know. I think that’s a bad idea. The ranch needs him, Pops and Rae need him. Isn’t it a pretty tough recovery, even if you’re the donor?”
“Yes, it is. He’s not a match, Jax. You don’t have to worry.”
“How do you know? Has he been tested already?” Shit. I’m not supposed to know her blood type. I stutter my way through an explanation.
“Rae’s blood. I know her blood type from when she broke her arm. Her and Maddox are different, so it stands to reason he and Sam can’t be the same blood type.”
“How is that?”
“If both parents have the same blood type, the child would also have the same type. Process of elimination.”
“Can you tell him that? He needs to realize there’s nothing more he can do. I don’t even know why he gives a damn.”
“Because, he’s a good man.” He seems surprised by my curt tone, but I’m frustrated I can’t make this easier for Mad without jeopardizing our future together. “I’ll talk to him when he gets back.”
“Thanks. I don’t know how any of this stuff works. I just know he hasn’t been himself since the night she turned up. He’s been through enough.”
“I know.”
“You’re a sight for sore eyes.” Maddox appears at the backdoor, looking disheveled and sexy as hell. I run into his arms, desperate for his touch. “I’m all sweaty, darlin’.” I push up onto my tiptoes, grabbing the scruff of his face in my palms.
“Just the way I like you.” I move my lips to his ear, my voice low enough for only him to hear. “I want you to make me sweaty… and naked.” My body craves him, knowing this could be the last time I see him for a while.
Rae interrupts our kiss, wriggling in between us. “I want hugs, too. Daddy and A.B. hugs for me!” He scoops her up as if she weighs no more than a feather, and pulls me back into his arms. I let myself relax into it, savoring everything about this moment. For the first time, I feel like I’m a part of this family—that the three of us were meant to be together.
“As much as I would love to keep hugging my girls, I really need to go for a shower.” Rae jumps out of his arms, and goes back to what she was doing. Jax raises his eyebrows at us as Mad takes my hand and leads me to his room.
“We’ll be ready for dinner in thirty minutes… make that an hour.” My cheeks flush at his words, embarrassed at the thought of Pops and Jax knowing what we’re doing—but not enough to let Mad shower alone!
The moment his door closes behind us, he pulls my top up and over my head, throwing it to the floor as he dips his head, nibbling at my breasts through the lace of my bra. “You. Are. So. Fucking. Sexy.” He says between nibbles. I can’t do anything but moan in reply, my body melting at his touch. It doesn’t take him long to strip me and lead me to the bathroom. The moment he turns the water on, I drop to my knees, pulling his jeans and boxers to the ground. He steps into the shower, water cascading over him. I want to lick every inch of his abs.
“Get your ass in here, darlin’.”
“You don’t have to tell me twice.” The second I’m inside, he pulls my back to his chest, letting the hot, soothing water trickle between my breasts.
“Mmm. You feel so damn good.” He grabs the soap and begins to rub my skin in sensual circles—from my neck, to my nipples, and down my stomach until he reaches between my legs. “Spread.” His voice is commanding, and I comply without hesitation. As his fingers glide over my clit, teasing me with every stroke, my legs begin to buckle. He grabs me tight, pushing me against the cold tile before thrusting two fingers inside me.
“Mad. Oh, God!”
“You like that?”
“Yes!” I love this side of him.
“I’m going to fuck you from behind, and you’re going to love it.” He continues his ministrations with his fingers, while kissing my back. He grabs my hips, pulling my ass to where he wants me. “Show me your pretty pussy, darlin’.”
I push myself against the scruff of his chin, writhing with anticipation for the sweet sensation of his tongue. “Oh, my God.” He envelops my pussy in a frantic kiss, his tongue flicking my clit. I can feel myself quickly build to a fever pitch, but just as I’m about to crash over the edge, he stops, his fingers pulling out of me. “Please, Mad. I need you. I’m so close.”
He pulls my hips, impaling me on his cock, before pressing me back against the tile. The unforgiving marble is a delicious juxtaposition to Mad’s warm, soft skin. I brace my hands on the wall, taking as much of him as I can. With each delectable thrust his lips caress my neck, his hands palming my breasts. “I can’t get enough of you, A.B. I could fuck you every day for the rest of my life and never get tired of watching you come.”
I wrap my hand around his neck, twisting back to kiss him with everything I have. It’s fierce and rough, and I never want it to end. “I love you, Mad.” He drives into me, harder and harder, riding me like a mustang. I buck, wild and free, completely lost to the sensation. “Oh fuck. I’m gonna come.” My orgasm rips from my body, his lips covering mine in an attempt to mute my screams.
He continues his punishing rhythm as I ride out the aftershocks, chasing his own release. His fingertips bite into my thigh—a pleasurable pain that I adore. As he crashes over the edge, I’m pulled along with him, finding a second and more intense climax. The water is cold, but I don’t care. I could stay here in this moment with him, forever.
By the time we dress and head back out to the living room, an hour has been and gone. The house is silent, dinner long finished. Jax is nowhere to be found, but I can here Pops singing out on the back porch. Rae is sound asleep in his arms, while he rocks back and forth on the swing, watching the sun set behind the trees. “Boy, you don’t remember the manners I raised you with?” My cheeks flush with embarrassment, saved only by the ring of my phone from inside the house.
“I’m gonna go answer that.” I hear Maddox chastising Pops for making me uncomfortable as I duck into the house. I search my bag, wondering what tonight’s medical emergency will be. A lost tooth? A tag related elbow scrape? My stomach plummets to the floor when I see who’s calling—it’s her.
It’s done. My attorney will deliver a letter to Maddox tomorrow. I just landed in New York. Now, get your ass here and help me.
I drop the phone, before dropping to my knees. I hoped this day would never come, but I took the Hippocratic Oath. No matter how much I want to let this woman rot, I need to help her. And above all else—I want to protect Maddox and Rae. This is the only way I know how to stop Maddox from hating himself for making the right decision.
The door swings open and Mad appears with Rae nestled in his arms. “A.B., are you okay? What’s wrong?” I wipe the tears from my eyes.
“I’m fine. I have to go.”
“Okay. Give me a minute and I’ll walk you out.”
“No! Take
your time.” I pull myself up and walk over to where he stands, planting a soft kiss on Rae’s forehead.
“Night, sunshine. Sweet dreams, precious girl.” I memorize the sweet pout of her tiny lips and the way her eyelashes kiss her cheek. I never expected to feel so strongly for this little girl, but I love her as if she were my own. And, I will do whatever it takes to protect her.
“You sure you have to go?” I gaze into his eyes, heartbroken and afraid. What if he doesn’t understand? What if he is unwilling to let me explain? It’s a chance I have to take.
“Yes.” I push up onto my tiptoes, taking his face in my hands. “I love you so much. You know that, right?” I press my lips to his in reverent melancholy.
“I do. I love you, too, darlin’.”
“I’ll see you soon. I promise.”
“Goodnight, A.B.”
“Goodbye, Maddox.” My limbs are heavy as I force myself to walk away. With every step, I question my decision not to tell him everything. He would never let me help get Sam out of their lives, and a part of me is scared he might resent me for it. Are my motives completely selfless? No. I want to protect Rae from the woman who so easily cast her aside, and I don’t want Maddox to carry around the burden of his decision for the rest of his life. But, it would also make it easier for me to become a part of their family. What if that’s all he sees? A selfish choice on my part.
My heart aches as I leave them behind, without a clue that tomorrow I will be gone. I have no idea when I’ll be back, or if they will let me back in their lives, but truly loving someone means being willing to lose them in order to save them. I’ll call Maddox when I get to New York, and pray he gives me the benefit of the doubt.
Our love has survived time, space, and a lot of heartbreak. I need to believe when I’m able to tell him what I’ve done, and why, we’ll find our way back to each other. We have to.
MADDOX
“It’s been a month, Maddox. You need to pick yourself up and get on with your life, or listen to what she has to say.”
“Are we going to have the same conversation every day? Or can we focus on the ranch? This project needs to be finished sooner rather than later, so we can start earning on the refurb.” I am so sick of Jax telling me what to do. I’m living Groundhog Day, over and over again, except rather than living the life I’ve built for myself, I’m back where I was when Sam left, and even worse, I’m back in high school.
I’m trying my best to get over the fact I got played, not once, but twice, by the one woman I thought I could trust. It took everything I had, to open my heart to A.B. and give her a second chance, and risk Rae’s happiness. She’s been devastated these past few days—asking when A.B. will be back—worrying she went to be with the angels like her granddaddy.
I’ve lost count of how many hours I’ve spent at Rae’s bedside, answering questions, wishing she was old enough to understand how amazing she is, and that the fault lies with me. I’ve lain awake and alone, dreading Samantha turning up again unannounced, and praying I find Annabeth on my doorstep.
My voicemail is full of cryptic messages from A.B., telling me she’ll explain everything when she comes back. Not a single one gives a good reason, in my eyes, why she would uproot her life, and everything we had, to go and treat a patient. I get daily text messages telling me she loves me, and how sorry she is she had to leave. I would never leave her behind, without saying goodbye in person. Voicemails and texts cloaked in mystery don’t make the situation any better. It’s like she doesn’t grasp how deep this cut me.
“Have you even acknowledged her messages?” I didn’t tell Jax about her attempts to reach out.
“How do you know she’s been trying to contact me?”
“Because I talk to her. She’s fucking devastated right now.”
“You’ve spoken to her?”
“Yes. And before you ask… no, she hasn’t told me why she had to go so suddenly. She has told me she will be back here as soon as she can, and she will tell you everything. This is killing her.”
“If you want to stand here and defend her actions, I need you to get out of my face.”
“I’m not.”
“Good. Because, I’m tired of trying to explain to my baby girl why she’s not here, and telling her she didn’t die like her granddaddy. I’m fucking sick of missing her so much it physically hurts. I’m angry, and I don’t want to listen to A.B.’s lame excuses, or your pathetic attempts at defending her. She broke my goddamn heart… and Rae’s.”
“Mad… I’m sorry, brother. I won’t bring it up again. What can I do?”
“Help me get this barn ready. I just want to work in silence.”
“Done.” Jax is true to his word. We put in a hard day’s labor, and for the first time since she left, I don’t feel completely useless. This barn is going to be breathtaking when it’s finished. I designed every last inch of it, from the rafters to the locks. It’s going to take a while, but I can see it coming together. I was going to marry A.B. in here.
Days turn into weeks, and as I watch my vision for the barn become a reality, it only serves as a marker of how long she’s been gone. I’ve been working day and night to get this place up and running. Contractors have done the major structural work while Jax and I keep up with the rest of the ranch, but when Rae is down for the night, I’ve been coming up here to try and escape the reminders of everything I’ve lost this year. The ride alone helps me outrun the pain, if only for a little while.
Jax has been preoccupied recently—some new girl has moved to town and is playing hard to get. He’s only taken with her because she’s not giving it up. The moment she does, he’ll lose interest and things will go back to normal. If I thought he was serious about a girl, I’d make the effort to get to know her, but I don’t have time to waste on people who are temporary. I’ve done enough of that in my life.
Today, we’re getting out of here to scout some new horses, and I think the change of scenery will be good for me. I’m so sick of everything I see, reminding me of A.B. “You ready, bro? Let’s hit the road.” Jax is too busy on his phone to acknowledge me. I kiss Rae goodbye and tell Pops to call if he needs anything. As much as I love them, I’m looking forward to a night away from it all. “Are you going to stare at the phone all day like an idiot?”
“Sorry. Woman troubles.” I know I’m going to regret it, but I ask the question anyway.
“You, woman trouble? Did the condom break?” Usually, I’d get a laugh with that one, but his mood is somber.
“I wish. This girl won’t give me the time of day.”
“What? You’ve been ignoring me for the past twenty minutes.”
“I’m giving it my best flirtin’ and she only seems interested in being friends. What the fuck is that?”
“You know it’s not the law you have to sleep with every woman who speaks to you?” That gets a mild smirk.
“Look at this face… I’m a handsome guy. We all know it! I can’t get her to agree to a single date.”
“Why do you care? Move on to the next girl. It’s not like you ever dip your stick more than once.”
“She’s different.” I’m not in the mood for this bullshit.
“That’s your dick talking. She turned you down, and now you’re going to convince yourself she’s special. When she finally gives in, you’ll think it’s the best sex you’ve ever had. It’s called being a cock tease. Trust me… walk away. Drama is the last thing you want.”
“You know she’s coming back, right?”
“I thought she just moved here?”
“Not Savannah. I mean A.B. She’s going to come back for you.” Just because he listens to her pathetic excuses, doesn’t mean I have to.
“Shut up, Jax. I don’t want to hear it.”
“I don’t care. It’s about time you man up. Yes, it’s shit she left without explaining, but it’s not like last time. She called you the minute she landed. She told you it was to help a patient. She’s been calling you every
single day. You’re not in high school anymore.”
“I told her when we started over, it just about broke me the first time she left. She knew this would kill me… and I don’t think she stopped to think about how it would affect Rae.”
“Wait a minute. You can’t assume that. She loves Sally Rae. She deserves to get a chance to defend herself.” His indignation grates on me.
“I gave her a second chance. I don’t give a third. We’re done talking about this.”
“Shoot yourself in the foot then. I hope your pride keeps you warm at night. But, no matter what you do she’s going to turn up on your doorstep sometime soon, and when that happens, you’ll only have yourself to blame for the result.”
We drive the rest of the way in silence, the radio blaring to avoid any further conversation. Every song is a testament to enduring love in the face of adversity, and I can’t help but wonder—what could be so important A.B. would risk our future? Other than Rae, I can’t think of anything that would tear me away from her. Maybe I was kidding myself when I thought we felt the same way. I’ve always loved her more than she loved me. That fact will never change.
Once we’re settled at the hotel, Jax and I head out to the local bar. We always come here when we’re in town. It’s a breath of fresh air to be surrounded by strangers. Every resident of Kingsbury Falls, can’t help but look at me with pity in their eyes. There goes poor Maddox Hale. Couldn’t keep a woman if his life depended on it. I’m so sick of being under the microscope.
“What’s your poison of choice tonight, bro?” Jax smirks. He has that look in his eye—the one that says I’m going to have a hangover tomorrow.
“My good friend Jack Daniels.”
“Good choice.” He signals the bartender, and then leans in, whispering something intelligible. This means trouble. She returns a few minutes later, setting our drinks in front of us, gesturing toward two ladies at the other end of the bar. I turn my attention to Jax.
“What did you do?” He feigns innocence.
