Because It's Not Love

by Kitty Parker

This time I trailed my thumb on his lower lip, getting a low growl that I could only hear. "This is both so new for us, a new experience that I'm willing to go through together." I placed both of my hands on his chest and tiptoed. This was it, I thought. I hope this was worth it. I gently placed my cold lips onto his, not moving them and stayed still like that. I bit his lower lip and heard him groan slightly as he pushed his tongue inside my mouth. I grinned and pulled away, seeing the shock and stunned expression he was giving me.

  I smirked as I stepped back slowly, giving him a playful smile as his lips quirked up into a small smile. "I promise; that was the last one." I then winked at him. "Well for now anyway."

  Carson eventually grinned and threw away the lilies. I didn't care about the lilies, even though they were my favorite flower. I didn't care about people staring at us or the sound of low wolf whistles and clapping hands surrounding us. I didn't care about the cold snow that was too thick for this winter. I didn't care about the past that we've been through. I didn't care about the future that was waiting for us.

  All I cared about was now the guy in front of me, reaching out and grabbing my hips onto his and finally kissing me with all the hunger that left both of us breathless. All I cared about was our goofy grin. All I cared that I was going to be his and he was going to be mine.

  Actually…all I cared about was that our kiss included tongue.

  Finally, I thought as I wrapped my arms around his neck.

  Right Girl

  "Maggie." He breathed out my name as I traced my lips along his jaw line. I ended up placing my lips on his ear as I set my hips against him, trying to sit on his lap as his hands gripped my back thighs. He was leaning on the couch while I leaned forward onto him with my legs straddling him. He growled huskily again, "Maggie, no…"

  I smirked and moved my hips forward and backwards, getting a feel of pure pleasure as I felt the hardness of him pressuring onto my own spot, that was now actually very warm from all the heat he was giving me. I moaned quietly as I nuzzled my lips on his neck, still swaying my hips slowly. I felt his hands exploring my back as I moved forward and traced my tongue along his bottom lip. I shivered at the low growl coming out of his mouth. I wrapped my arms around his neck as I deepened our kiss, tasting the masculine flavor of him. I was stunned by the lust that was shown between us; we really did miss each other that bad.

  I sat back down on the hard part of his body and arched my back, letting him do the small kisses down my neck. I bit my lip and tried to breathe normal from the bliss I was feeling as I felt his tongue rolling down on the spot underneath my throat. I smiled to myself and moved my hips again to a pretty fast rhythm by now.

  "Maggie, if you don't stop by now then I don't think…" I could feel his tongue against my warm skin above my breast. He was currently sucking on an exposed spot of my now unbuttoned shirt (when did this happen again?) as he breathed out what he was saying so huskily. "…I don't think I can stop later."

  I wasn't sure what he was actually saying to me so I ignored everything around me and kept quiet while I let my hands explore his arms. I was still arching my back further while he started to suck on my skin harder.

  So here we were, in my living room, having a very passionate making out session after the confession he said a while ago. I wanted to smile at the thought of him being my boyfriend now, how we were now in an official relationship. But I couldn't, I was rubbing us together so fast that I couldn't do anything else but to bite my lip as another moan was coming on its way at the bottom of my throat.

  Not even the sound of a car stopping on the drive way in front of the house could stop me from having sex with my boyfriend now. I closed my eyes and let the desire flow through our bodies. The fast movement I was making with my hips was making us go crazy. I leaned forward to find the spot I wanted to feel him against the hotness of my body. His hips followed the rhythm and we both looked at each other while we waited for the right moment to—

  The rustling of keys made me jump.

  Shit!

  I quickly untangled my legs around Carson and sat beside him further than I was supposed to. I buttoned my shirt quickly and fixed my hair with my fingers, finding that they were actually quite messy. I glanced at Carson and he was too buttoning his shirt. Wait…when did I open it? He caught me staring and our eyes met for a brief moment…until I nodded at the hard lump underneath his trousers. He turned red and grabbed a cushion pillow beside him and placed it on his lap. I giggled and he just gave me a look that said he was definitely going to get me later.

  Not that I was complaining…

  "Carson, I know you're in here! If you and my sister are doing anything right now…just stop." Nick's voice echoed around the house and I rolled my eyes. Carson chuckled softly and I had the urge to just shut him up with my lips. Yep, his laughter was that inviting.

  Nick finally entered the room and eyed Carson and I suspiciously. We were on the same couch but I made a decent space between us that if I moved a little to my left I'd probably fall from the couch. There was nothing suspicious going on that Nick could see.

  I smiled sweetly at my brother. "Hey, we were just watching a movie—" I stopped mid sentence as my eyes snapped to the TV in front of us and realized that it was actually turned off. God, I could be really stupid sometimes. "Well nothing happened." I added quickly.

  Nick raised an eye brow at me and shook his head afterwards with a slight smirk on his face. He scoffed before his smirk grew into a wide grin. "I would believe that if your shirt wasn't buttoned all in the wrong holes."

  At what he said I quickly glanced down my blouse. Shit, I buttoned it too quickly that I missed the second hole. I heard Carson laughing quietly and I glared at him before standing up and brushing my shoulder hard on Nick as I walked out of the room. I could hear them letting out a big bark of laughter. Great, my freaking brother and boyfriend were laughing at my stupidity.

  I was buttoning my shirt as I walked towards the kitchen when I spotted Lisa hanging her coat near the front door. She saw me and I turned into a darker shade of red as she squealed like a little girl in joy. I groaned and ignored her presence as I finally buttoned my shirt right this time and stepped into the kitchen.

  After Carson and I kissed out the cold snow, he grabbed my hand and we climbed in his car to escape from people's gazes on us. We left everybody, even our friends, and went straight to my house. We didn't have the chance to talk about our official 'relationship' to anybody. Well until now I guess.

  Why did we come to my house? Why couldn't we go to his house? I forgot that Nick lived here as well.

  "I can't believe you have a boyfriend now!" She squealed loud again as she sat on top of the island. I was very aware that my said boyfriend could hear what she was saying out loud. I didn't want to seem all giddy about this so I just merely rolled my eyes as I placed four mugs on the counter.

  "Well...he actually never told me of him being my boyfriend, come to think of it." I questioned out loud as I glanced at her thoughtfully.

  She only waved a hand off at me. "Please, he was already your boyfriend to start with."

  I sighed and looked away. "I have a boyfriend now, big deal." I shrugged, trying to act cool but failed miserably because of the now redder shade on my cheeks. I wish Lisa would figure that this was because of the cold…but I doubt she would ever think that way.

  "Okay, if you don't want to talk about it then I won't push you any further." She exclaimed as she raised her hands in surrender. By the look of her lips pressing together, I could tell she was trying so hard not to tease me. I bet she had many things to say.

  I leaned on the counter in front of her and crossed my arms as she tried not to laugh at my face. "Okay, go on. You can make fun of me."

  She actually jumped off the island and held me by my elbows as she grinned foolishly at my red cheeks. "Margaret Andrea Wilson, you have no idea how I want to dance right now and sing 'I told you so' in your face. I'm so happy for you, yeah, but w
hat I really want to say is how stupid you were for not believing my words that Carson would eventually come and fight for you! Even your brother was already giving you his blessings but noooo, you just had to be that stubborn not to realize that Carson loved you from the beginning. No, both of you were so stubborn you guys were making me pretty dizzy seeing both of you holding onto your pride. You my friend, could be very stupid." She patted my head joyfully and stepped away.

  "Lisa, I have my brother and my so-called boyfriend laughing at my stupidity in the living room now. I don't want my best friend to join them." I stated as I poured the four mugs with my special tea I bought the other day, it was delicious.

  Lisa gave me a confused look and I explained everything without looking at her. Somehow mixing the tea with a spoon was much better than looking at her in the eyes while I was telling her the story of how Nick almost walked in on Carson and I making out and how my brother pointed out that my shirt was all buttoned wrongly.

  She laughed at me while I took a sip of my drink. "So you guys didn't do it?"

  I chocked and burnt my tongue. I shot her a glare before placing my mug down and wiped my mouth with a napkin. I wish I chocked harder so I could spread some of it onto her face.

  She only giggled before drank her mug happily...until her eyes went wide in realization as she placed the mug down. She quickly grabbed her bag and dug inside it, trying to find whatever she wanted. "Speaking of sex, I wanted to give you…ah where is it? Oh here it is!" She handed me a little bottle and I shook it, aware that there was something containing inside of it.

  "What is it?" I asked as I read the instruction on how to use it.

  "Those are pills, take them properly and you're good to go." She winked at me and sat on the island again with her mug in her hands again.

  "Pills?"

  "Uh Yeah, birth control pills…in case you get pregnant?"

  My eyes went wide and I stared at her dumbfounded. Holly shit, I was just making up with my boyfriend a few hours ago. I wasn't on the stage of drinking these…pills. "Where did you get these?"

  Lisa shrugged. "Nick doesn't like to wear a condom so I guess…" She trailed off as she realized that the boyfriend she was talking about was actually my brother. She gave me a sheepish smile. "Sorry."

  I sighed and placed the pills onto the counter. "As glad I am to hear that you're having safe sex with my brother, I don't think I need this."

  "What are you talking about? You guys had sex before and now you're in a relationship with him, of course you need this."

  "I know but…I want to talk about our new relationship with him. We didn't get the chance because…well he actually didn't give me a chance to speak." I smirked at the memory when we stepped inside the house. I was about to ask him how we were going to take this relationship when all of a sudden he picked me up and sat me on his lap.

  Lisa only rolled her eyes at me. "If Nick and I didn't barge in…you guys would probably be on the way of making a house full of babies."

  "Lisa!"

  She crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes at me. "Take those; it's always better to bring an umbrella before it rains."

  I rolled my eyes. "How am I supposed to know when it rains to bring an umbrella?"

  "See? The unexpected could happen. Enter the pills!" She exclaimed. I didn't say anything else and shoved the pills in my pocket. (I know; uniforms are weird. Never thought there would be pockets in my skirt.) I could never win against Lisa. I picked up my mug and a mug for Carson and walked out of the kitchen. Lisa followed me behind with a smug smile on her face, holding two mugs as well.

  I entered the living room and saw that Nick and Carson were debating on who was the best team in football legend. I rolled my eyes as I sat beside my boyfriend and gave him the mug. He thanked me by giving me a peck on the lips and somehow I managed to blush by the little contact. Carson nodded at Lisa's presence and we ended up having a decent conversation. After an hour of joking around, we ended up watching a movie. We didn't know what to watch so we went with Lisa's choice of watching Friends. We didn't argue because Friends was the only TV show that the guys enjoyed. It was pretty legendary.

  I sat on the wide couch with Carson and leaned onto him with one big quilt wrapping around us while Lisa was sitting on Nick's lap in the love couch. Although we laughed while we watched, I wasn't really comfortable at the view of my brother and best friend cuddling and giving light kisses to one another. Carson probably felt my shoulders stiffen when Nick grabbed Lisa's chin and kissed her gently, forgetting the show and of course, forgetting the existence of Carson and I. I was glad that Carson wrapped an arm around me as he held me tighter. "Do you want to get out of here?"

  I didn't answer him and merely grabbed his arms toward the back door. I grabbed the quilt while he held our mugs as we quietly left the love birds behind. We ended up sitting on the back porch with a smile on our face as we admired the cool breeze and the wonderful view of snow falling down softly. We were sitting beside each other with comfortable silence, a mug each in our hands and a quilt wrapping our body warmly. It was pretty cold since Christmas was only in a few days. Crap, I remembered that I had yet to go Christmas shopping.

  The wind blew hard all of a sudden and I leaned closer to Carson. He placed his mug down beside him and wrapped an arm around me. I looked up at him to see if he was as cold as I was when all of a sudden his lips crashed mine. It was nothing passionate like we had earlier, but it still knocked me down. It was slow and sweet; I could actually feel the love he was feeling. Of course, he didn't say that he loved me…but the kiss was telling me something serious was going on between us. I somehow managed to place my mug away as well and ended up sitting on his lap. I blushed at myself; I think I really do need the pills. Just one kiss and we could have been having sex on the cold snow. I giggled at the thought.

  He grinned at my lips. "What? What's so funny?"

  "I was just thinking that if we don't stop, we might get caught having sex in the cold."

  Suddenly my words seemed to sink his thoughts because he pulled away slowly. I frowned at him but didn't say anything. He laughed at my disappointment and kissed the tip of my cold nose. "As fun and weird that sounded, I want our first time as an official couple to be perfect."

  I giggled and cupped his face. "Carson, I know it's your first time in a serious relationship but you don't have to do all those romantic stuff. I still even feel guilty that we left all the lilies at school."

  "But I want to. I want to spoil you like a baby." He grinned sheepishly.

  "Fine…we'll have it your way."

  He kissed me again but pulled away quickly as I traced my tongue along his bottom lip. He laughed at my sudden urge to rape him. "Easy there." He whispered beside my ear and I hugged him closer to me, feeling safe and happy in his arms. "I want to keep my promise. Actually, I want to keep my bet."

  "What bet?"

  "I'm not going to sleep with you until Christmas comes around."

  I finally looked at him with nervous eyes as I settled my hands on his chest. "Carson, have you…"

  He silenced me by a long passionate kiss that was worth toes curling. The more I kiss him the more the heat from his body was warming me from the cold of the snow. "Trust me; I have kept my baby maker in my pants only for you."

  I laughed at his choice of words. "You have?"

  He nodded sheepishly and I... I don't know, I somehow believed in him. This man was the man that I managed to someway tame…his sincere smile made me believe that he was telling the truth.

  I then told him that I also kept my bet on the chocolate thing and he believed me. It was funny how trust could be every meaning for us.

  We decided to finally do a romantic thing after Christmas. Around Christmas would probably be chaotic on families and presents so we decided to spend New Year's Eve together. I was grinning like an idiot at our plan. We were going to do romantic things on New Year's Eve together and spend New Year's Day together. I hope I co
uld wait that much. He might be a gentleman now to hold his promise…but I don't think I could. Lisa was right; I should probably take the pills from now. In case…our plan on spending the change of the year together went out of plan.

  "What pills?"

  I glanced at him and just realized that I was thinking my mind out loud. Holy shit…the grin on his face showed me that he knew exactly what pills I was talking about. I felt my cheeks burning so I buried my face between his shoulder and neck so he couldn't see the blush that was forming on my cheeks. "I don't want to answer that."

  His laugh came before his lips touched mine.

  Special

  Mom wanted to do something new.

  Christmas at our house was always the usual: family gathering, eating dinner, opening presents the next morning and all that kind of stuff. This year, mom wanted to do something new. I thought that we'd go to a fancy restaurant instead of cooking in the house or maybe mom decided not to invite her family…not that I dislike them.

  It's just that…mom has a lot of siblings (which are my aunts and uncles) and they have many kids which are mostly ten years old and under so they tend to act like annoying little brats.

  So of course I would jump in happiness when mom told me that we'd be spending Christmas this year out of town…wait, it gets better…in a ski resort! Yes! Not only would I spend a beautiful vacation in the snow but I would also have a Christmas without babysitting my small cousins! This might be the greatest Christmas of all time.

  "Don't get too excited." Mom eyed me as my grin widened. I mean come on! I haven't been to a ski resort before…and unlike most teenagers thinking that it would be so uncool having a family trip like this, I was so thrilled that I might pee in my pants.

  "But we're going on a trip! When was the last time we had a family vacation?" I asked Nick beside me. The four of us (Including dad) were having breakfast a few days before Christmas. We were all seated in the dining table with warm pancakes in front of us.