Saving Sophia

by Isabella Laase

  The photos of her young parents were the most difficult to process as the fuzzy past was presented under an umbrella of evidence she couldn’t internalize. The realization they would forever stay twenty-one years old and frozen in a still photograph overwhelmed what little thoughts she had left and her few memories suddenly became even more insignificant.

  Minutes went by before she realized all eyes were focused on her, and she handed the photos back with a frown. With a desperate attempt to rein in her emotions, she clung to denial. “That doesn’t mean anything. So you have pictures of me and my parents.”

  He took a breath and pulled out his wallet. “This is a picture of my family when I was little boy. My mother was in her thirties, but I think you’ll see the resemblance.”

  It was unreal. Despite the decades-old clothing and hair styles, the woman could have been her, yet she was surrounded by seven matching children and a smiling husband. She stared hard in an attempt to find a connection to the happy family, but came up with no recognition beyond the single mirrored face.

  Thomas’ voice broke into her debate. “My parents are anxious to meet you. Most of us are married with children. Three days ago my sister had her fourth child, and you have twenty-one first cousins on this side alone. My wife and I have three children.” He handed her another picture. “You look like our daughters too, but they’re still very young.”

  Everything in her brain wanted to reject the offering but nagging curiosity was not easily defeated. Marcus’ stone-cold look softened when she turned to him for support, and she took a deep breath. She drew enough strength from his presence to reach for the picture, but her hand trembled dangerously.

  The twin girls were about five or six years old, and the baby boy couldn’t have been more than a few months. The understanding that these beautiful children were her very own siblings brought the first emotional tears, and she ran her fingertips over their image. Marcus was quick to pull her closer, and she buried her face into his shoulder.

  “I’m not going to lie to you, Sophia,” Thomas continued. “When Sarah took off with Grant, I was relieved. My only shot at college was a football scholarship to the University of Maryland. I’m ashamed I didn’t look for you, and I don’t want to make any excuses. It was a horrible, selfish decision, and I’ll live with it the rest of my life. But if I’d known Grant and Sarah had passed away, I swear I would have come for you sooner. It never occurred to me that you needed me. I was stupid, but I would have come.”

  The emotional whirlpool continued to fight against her reasoning, and her brain struggled to find just one question. “What do you want from me? I don’t understand.”

  “Come home, Sophia. Come back to Dover. We want to be your family. My parents are still on their farm, and most of your mom’s family are nearby, too. I can even introduce you to the Montgomerys if you want to know them. Grant was a great guy to take care of Sarah, and he deserves a positive place in your memory. I… I know it’s a small offering now, but give us a chance and let me help you financially. You can go to a four-year college, or get a job, or anything you want. The world is—”

  Marcus’ angry voice interrupted. “She isn’t going anywhere. She belongs in Wyoming. She’s going to finish her associate’s degree and come back here to be part of this family.”

  Her father returned the glare and stood. “That’s her decision to make. I don’t know who the hell you think you are, but I’m talking to Sophia, not you.”

  Marcus rose and took a step toward Thomas, but Jack stepped smoothly between them with his hand on Marcus’ shoulders. Their eyes met for a brief moment, and Jack delivered his calm message without the need for speech.

  Linc took a deep breath. “Marcus. Take a minute and think. If there was ever a time in your relationship to have an open and honest conversation with Sophia, this is it.”

  With his glare still fixed on Thomas, Marcus pushed Jack’s hands away with a more than a little force. His eyes gave no hint of fear, but Sophia knew him well enough to recognize his struggle. His frightening move twisted with her already confused thoughts, and she couldn’t breathe. When Thomas took another step toward Marcus, she fled from all of them and ran as far away as she could get.

  She sought her comfort at the farthest edge of her gardens, but well short of the path that led beyond Cloudcroft’s security. Settled in the middle of her pink coneflowers, she evaporated into confused misery.

  Within a few minutes, Bella found her and sent a quick text. “People are looking for you. I told Marcus you’re out here and asked him to give us a few minutes. Are you okay, Sophia? I… Meg and I were listening at the dining room door. We heard it all.”

  With choking sobs, Sophia threw her herself into Bella’s embrace. Despite their bickering, Bella was the closest girlfriend she’d ever had, and the wonders of her Cloudcroft family made her more than just a companion.

  “It’s just too much change,” she cried. “I had it all worked out. I was going to finish school, and have Marcus and be part of Cloudcroft. Now, it’s all ruined.”

  “Don’t be stupid,” said Bella with a scowl. “You’re not anybody’s property. You’re an adult woman in the twenty-first century who’s capable of making her own decisions. If you decide to stay with us, he can’t drag you back to some chicken farm in Delaware.”

  “You don’t understand. You’ve always had a family. This man… my father… showed up with a whole new world. It’s everything I’ve dreamt of during my entire childhood… and they want me. Could you walk away from something you wanted your entire life?”

  Bella’s scowl remained, and Sophia wondered if she’d insulted her. She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. “I… it’s not that I don’t love all of you, but they’re part of me. How can I not go?”

  “He didn’t exactly give us a minute,” Bella mumbled as she looked over Sophia’s shoulder.

  Strong, proud, and powerful, Marcus walked across her colorful gardens. The ranch house framed his image in a picture perfect setting, and he locked his eyes onto hers long before he reached her side. With the energy of everything she loved in one place, she felt some of the anxiety escape from her muscles. He covered the distance quickly, and she fell into his arms with a tremble. “I’m sorry I ran out. It was just too much.”

  Bella grabbed his hand. “Tell her, Marcus. Tell her that she doesn’t have to leave. She thinks she has some obligation to go with this sperm donor and get to know his stupid family. She belongs here with us.”

  He looked softly at Bella. “Scram, little wolf. I have to talk to Sophia… alone.”

  The defiant look on the tiny fireball’s face matched her crossed arms. “I’m not going anywhere until Sophia agrees to stay. I have as much to say about this as you do.”

  He sighed and moved his hand to his all too familiar belt. “Are you really going to do this now, Bella? If I take this off, you’re going to wish you’d never woken up this morning.”

  She quivered briefly and burst into tears before storming to the house. The mix of emotions made it hard to tell if she was angry or just very, very sad. Knowing she was the guilty source of Bella’s mixed emotions, Sophia made a move to follow her.

  Marcus grabbed her arm and took a quick moment to send his own text. “No, stay here. Jack will take care of her.” She waited for him to finish his task while the new understanding of her old world continued to spin in dangerous circles.

  He finished quickly, but clear indecision rested on his handsome face. It was a long few seconds before he let out a sigh and sat on the ground to pull her into his lap. With his arms wrapped firmly around her, she took her first easy breath since the drama started and relaxed her muscles to meet his steady breath.

  His voice was tight, but he spoke calmly. “I’m sorry this was sprung on you without warning. And I’m sorry I got mad at him back there. It was a lot for me to process too, but we didn’t hit each other. It’s all good.”

  “You don’t have to apologize,”
she said bitterly. “It’s my crazy messed-up past that brought all this to Cloudcroft. I’m not surprised the drama was just too much for you.”

  “Damn it, Sophia,” he snapped with frustrated exasperation. “When are you going to recognize that your drama is part of me too? Why is it so hard to imagine that somebody cares enough to support you through anything, even the introduction of an entire family?”

  She returned to quiet sniffling. “I know. I’m sorry. It’s just way too much change. I’ve spent my whole life believing I was alone in the world, and now…”

  They waited in silence while the real question hung dangerously in the air. Marcus pulled her closer. “What are you thinking?”

  “I… I don’t know what to say. I want to get to know them, but I don’t want to leave. Even Jackson seemed like it was going to be a challenge, but Delaware is just too far away.”

  He tried to smile. “You can’t make the decision unless you know all the facts. Why don’t you just start with dinner? You two go into Marion and have a meal on your own. Just listen to what he has to say.”

  The sincere words should have offered some level of comfort, but the tense, nonverbal message sent the smallest tinges of dismissal. “Do you think I should? Really?”

  His chin remained granite. “Of course. You’ll be safe at the diner in Marion, and if you’re uncomfortable in any way, scream for the sheriff and go to my mothers’ house until I can pick you up. One small step at a time, Sophia. That’s how we make the tough choices in life.”

  Within the hour, she was showered and dressed in her best jeans and shirt in the front seat of the nondescript rental car. Thomas had no trouble filling in the silence with his stories of extended family and a world she struggled to keep straight.

  “It’s weird to think of having sisters and a brother.” She spoke softly. “I… do they know about me?”

  “The girls are old enough to understand, and they’re excited to meet you, but the baby is too small.” He hesitated then added, “I hope you can call me Dad someday. I know I don’t deserve it now, but maybe…”

  His expression and tone held years of regret, but the first biological connection to another human being in twenty years was so alien, she couldn’t begin to internalize somebody else’s feelings.

  She spoke tentatively. “I’ll try… it’s just a lot of change in a very short day… Dad.”

  The word was clearly forced, and he laughed. “I hope you haven’t any prospects as an actress. You can call me anything you want, and I’m just grateful for the chance to get to know you. I shouldn’t have dumped everything on you at once. My wife told me to give you some time to get used to the news before I tried to take you home, but I admit that I’m anxious. I have a lot of catching up to do.”

  Dinner was a peaceful affair, and the conversation grew easier surrounded by comfort food and a cold beer. Marcus texted her every half hour, and she replied faithfully with reassurances of her safety.

  He poked his hamburger with a fork and a subtle frown. “I gather the big guy back there is somebody special to you?”

  “He is,” she responded with a soft smile.

  The agitation in his voice was easy to identify. “When the private investigator located you, he did some research on Cloudcroft. I know what they do there and… I don’t mind saying it concerns me. You’re a beautiful young woman, and the idea you’re in any kind of abusive relationship is disturbing. I really want you to come back to Delaware with an open mind.”

  “What do you mean… open mind?” she asked with a tight voice.

  “I mean, I just want to make sure that you understand you have options,” he backtracked quickly. “I can help you now, and I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you really needed me.”

  “Let’s get something straight,” she said with firm clarity. “If I go with you, it isn’t permanent. I will come back to Wyoming. My relationship with Marcus is perfectly healthy and based on mutual respect and clear communication. I may make lifestyle choices that you don’t agree with but I don’t have to justify my decisions to anybody except me.” Strength was easy when she knew she was right.

  “Of course,” he said softly. “Coming back here is an option too. Just give us the chance. The private investigator talked to your professors, and I know you’re a good student. I’m an administrator at Wesley College in Dover. I can pull a few strings, and you can still enroll with the fall semester. They have a great environmental science program, or you could start over with something totally different. You can do anything you want, and… if you still feel strongly… you can come back here when you’re done.”

  Confronted with another bombshell, she struggled to grasp the possibilities. Her very own biological family, a four-year degree from a reputable school, and a whole new life was one simple word away. All she had to do was say yes.

  “I… I need some time. Can I talk to Marcus and let you know?”

  He frowned at the mention of Marcus’ name. “Of course, but if you want to start school with the fall semester, we really need to leave by Friday. It’ll take us a few days to get you settled and classes start next week. We want you to live with us, but if you’re more comfortable in your own place, I’ll pay for an apartment too. I… I really want to help, Sophia. You’re my child, and it would go a long way in settling my guilt if you gave me this small chance now.”

  The short time frame didn’t calm her nerves, and she remained quiet on the ride home. A soft rain started and distant thunder answered. The hot, humid air and unstable atmospheric pressure defined the impending summer storm, and the suffocating stillness exacerbated her confused emotions.

  When he stopped in front of the house, Thomas kissed her gently on the forehead. “I’m staying at a B&B in Marion tonight. I’ll come back tomorrow.”

  “That’s silly,” said Sophia, grateful to finally find an easy response. “We have all sorts of room, even during the resort days there’s more space on the third floor.”

  The disdain on his face sent its own clear message. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. I… I wouldn’t be comfortable, even if you don’t have… uh… guests.” His contempt caused her to blush, and she had no response other than a quiet goodbye. She left his car as the rain began to hit the roof.

  Marcus was waiting at the front door. He held her closely for a very long time before he pulled back with a gentle smile. “Did you have a good time?”

  The magnitude of her decision mixed with her father’s clear disapproval to create a confused muddled mess that demanded more than his carefully chosen, neutral response. Her anger came easily, and she snapped, “I’m fine. But I’m tired. I think I’ll go to bed.”

  He nodded slowly and stepped aside in a move that was far more symbolic than physical. She lifted her chin and walked to the third floor. After a brief moment of indecision, she walked past the room she’d shared with him for weeks and to the little room she’d started with on her first lonely day at the ranch. She just needed to process, and she prayed he’d understand.

  The burgeoning storm hit with a vengeance and the sounds of a beating rain pummeled the roof. The wind whipped at an oak tree outside her window, and the added darkness under the rolling clouds limited her view of the ranch. A glance at her cell phone showed eleven messages from Bella demanding she stay in Wyoming before they ended abruptly, and she figured Jack had gotten ahold of her.

  For the first time in her life, solitude brought no comfort, and she broke into choking tears. She stripped and got under the covers in an attempt to feel some connection to her own skin when Marcus came into the room. He didn’t knock, but she really hadn’t expected him to. Deep down, she knew he’d come no matter what she thought she wanted.

  She needed the comfort from his familiar grin, but received only a gentle smile. He sat on the edge of her bed while she pulled her knees to her chin and tried to make herself small. His hand rested on her knee to link them together, but he didn’t advance any further.

&n
bsp; The voice was not his own. “What did you decide?”

  She closed her eyes. “He wants me to leave in two days. He can arrange for an exclusive college in his hometown, and promises a whole wonderful family, but it would take years to finish the degree.”

  Marcus sighed and pulled her closer. He didn’t speak for a very long time. “It’s a tough choice. But it isn’t a bad one. You’ve always wondered about your family, and now you have the chance to find out.”

  “This is crazy,” she cried. “You’re my dom. Tell me what to do. Should I stay here or should I go with him?”

  He tapped her chin to lift her gaze off the bedspread. “Linc and Jack have been lecturing me all day, and they’re right. As much as I want to, I can’t make this decision for you. The whole scene is about a game. This is real life. If I told you not to go, you might regret the missed chance, and hold me accountable. We’d never succeed in the long run. You need to decide, and I promise I’ll support you.”

  “But it isn’t fair. Why now? I have all of you, and I’m not sure I want to start over. But if I don’t go, how will I ever know what it feels like? You guys take your family for granted. You have no idea what it’s like to be without.”

  He took a deep breath. “You’re right. We don’t. That’s why I can’t decide for you. I can only promise that I’ll be here when you’re ready to come back.”

  “You can’t promise that,” she sighed. “I won’t let you. We’ve only known each other a few months. If I go, I’ll come back, but you can’t promise to wait for me. We both know it will be different. I won’t be a few hours down the road in Jackson. I’ll be across the country for months and months at a time.”

  Given an outlet for his displeasure, he scolded, “You don’t get to pick for me. If you want to move back east, we’ll make it work. I promise.”

  His reassurances opened the tiniest door for her thoughts, but the tears began easily, and she cuddled into his hardened chest to relieve her tension. A baby brother, two small sisters, and a whole biological family were just a step away, but Marcus was right in front of her.