Saving Sophia

by Isabella Laase

  Under the cloud of a summer storm, a restless sleep finally defeated her. She stayed emotionally tied to Marcus and dreamt of Cloudcroft, but her mind was made up before dawn began their day.

  * * *

  Two days later she was packed and ready to go. Thomas loaded her bags into his car with a happy resolve, and the entire Cloudcroft family stood on the front porch. She was crying softly before she settled her backpack into the front seat.

  She said goodbye to Meg and Jerry first. Jerry offered her a shy smile and kissed her gently on the forehead. “Goodbye, Sophia. I’m really going to miss you.” Meg wiped the tears from her eyes and spoke gruffly. “Be a good little shit out there. They don’t know how lucky they are.”

  Bella threw herself into Sophia’s arms, and the girls sobbed with an honest heartache that was felt by everyone who witnessed them. Even Thomas shifted his feet uncomfortably. It was a long few minutes before Jack gently put his arms around Bella’s shoulders. “Come on, little wolf. They have a plane to catch.”

  Bella sniffled and sent her last glare in Thomas’ direction. “If he doesn’t treat you well, get your ass on a plane and come back where you belong.”

  Jack smirked, but wrapped his arms around Sophia for another long hug. “Goodbye, Sophia. We’ll be waiting for you when you’re ready to come back to us.”

  He handed her to Linc for his own gruff goodbye. He joked quietly, “Take care of yourself. I know you’ll be fine. Just don’t beat up any bitches out there, or I’ll send you to Delaware with your own ironwood paddle. We’ll see you at Christmas.”

  The understanding she would return to Wyoming for the long semester break was a prerequisite to her decision, and Sophia took some comfort in the reservations Thomas had already helped her make. She looked at the five of them and smiled softly, but then turned her attention to Marcus and something broke deep inside her heart.

  Sadness overwhelmed her as the weight of her emotions consumed her vision and dark sobs choked her ability to speak. Marcus held her closely but she struggled to find the strength hidden in his familiar presence. The intensity was so strong, she didn’t think she had ever felt as lonely as she did at that single moment. Finally, he brought her eyes to meet his gaze and spoke firmly. “Hush, Sophia. You can do this. It’s what you want and every moment of your life has prepared you to take this step. I’ll be waiting for you in just four months.”

  She heard his words, but knew it would never be the same. His quiet, daily comfort, the magic of Cloudcroft, and her first ever family would be placed in a different part of her heart. She looked to her father who glanced at his watch, but offered a patient smile. He could fill a need that had remained empty her entire life.

  Marcus spoke again. “Go on, Sophia. You’ll never know unless you try. I promise. It will all be fine.”

  With one last look at his eyes, she memorized the emotion that came from his connection. She got into the rental car, and they drove away from Cloudcroft. She couldn’t even bring herself to look backward.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Huge choking sobs threatened to destroy her and fueled a trembling that grew worse with every mile. For two full hours, she cried as her father offered quiet words of encouragement. “Don’t cry, Sophia. You’ll love Delaware. The girls are excited to meet you and so is Leslie. She’s clearing out the den as we speak so you’ll have your own space away from the kids.”

  By the time he reached Jackson, her body had given up on its battle to produce more tears, but the crushing sadness still threatened her speech. With silent resolve, she followed her father through the airport with her head low. She made no attempt to hide the puffy eyes and swollen face that reflected her misery, and he was clearly uncomfortable in the face of so much heartache.

  After a quick return of the rental car, he pushed them a little faster to make the flight, but a text brought his heavy sigh. “The plane’s delayed for an hour. Why don’t we have lunch and just relax for a few minutes. You might feel better if you eat something.”

  She nodded slowly, and they were quickly settled in an airport restaurant with sandwiches and chips. Thomas continued his enthusiastic description of life in Delaware while Sophia stared at the design of the paper placemat and tried hard to listen.

  “I promise you’re going to love it. We still get four seasons a year, but the winters aren’t nearly as harsh as Wyoming. The summers are perfect, and we’re close enough to the beach resorts that we can get over there pretty regularly. My family is already planning a big party so everyone can meet you. It’s going to be great having all of my kids together. You might not even want to come back here at Christmas.”

  She had given up on correcting him about her return. She took another bite of the tuna sandwich that tasted more like cardboard than food while he continued to describe the familial relationships she still struggled to keep straight.

  Staring aimlessly out the window into the airport terminal, she saw a family of three walk past on their way to some unknown destination. A small, blonde toddler with a single, tiny ponytail giggled while she hung between her parents. Pulling from her happiness, they lifted her feet off the ground with a gentle swinging motion, earning more squeals of delight. Her stuffed black and white panda stuck his head out of her tiny pink backpack, giving another hint of a content childhood.

  Sophia smiled, but felt no tug of the jealousy or remorse that would have defined the same scene six months earlier. They were simply another happy family, and she had one of her own.

  With a bright smile, Thomas took that moment to give her hand a gentle touch, and she stared while her new self-reflection brought a clarity she hadn’t expected. Her biological father sat opposite her with welcoming acceptance. His eyes, hair coloring, and even his size spoke of a close genetic tie, and the pictures of his mother and daughters were further evidence of the family he’d promised. The four-year college, the warm and accepting family, and even the quaint house in a pretty little village all portrayed the quintessential American life that filled the dreams of her lonely past.

  But she was done with her past, and there was no reason to look backward. Her imperfect childhood was defined by tragedy, loss, and now, deception. But the experiences had created the unique personality that made her special, and she liked who she was. Regrets were pointless. Her father and his family could never fill the gap from her empty years, and she didn’t need them to complete her secure future. Her home was Cloudcroft and her family was defined by love and choice, not genetics or ancestry.

  She met his gaze with confidence and looked for the words to make it easier for the kind man who was offering his heart, but she didn’t have to. He sighed. “You want to go back now, don’t you?”

  She nodded slowly. “I… I’m so sorry. You’ve already spent so much money on my plane tickets. I’ll pay you back, I promise. But… I… they’re my family, Thomas. I mean… they’re my real family. I want to get to know you and the rest of your family. I hope someday I’ll feel the same about all of you, but my life is with Marcus.”

  He nodded slowly as the first boarding call for their plane came over the loudspeaker. She scrambled for her carryon. “Please, get on the plane without me. I’ll find my own way back to the ranch, and I’ll arrange to have my suitcases returned to Jackson.”

  A deep scowl caught her by surprise, and he spoke with an incredulous growl. “You’ve got to be kidding me. Do you really think after leaving you alone for twenty-three years, I’m going to let you drive back there?”

  The intense message frightened her, and she feared his disapproval of Cloudcroft’s lifestyle had defeated his reason. But the few panicked seconds were quickly defeated as her new strength recognized the courage and confidence that would never again leave her lonely and victimized. She spoke softly. “With all due respect, you really can’t stop me.”

  “I’m not trying to stop you,” he said with exasperation. “I’m going to drive you back myself. I meant it when I said that I want to m
ake you happy. If that giant sadist is what you want, then that’s what you’re going to have. But so help me, if he ever hurts you, I’ll kill him.”

  Her sigh was almost anticlimactic. “He’s not really a sadist… he’s…” She tried to find the right words, but the memory of his many grins watching her get her ass burned made the answer harder. She chewed on her bottom lip then added, “Okay, maybe there is a little sadism in there, but…”

  She looked at Thomas with the sudden realization she was discussing her sex life with her father, and she blushed. “Uh… I’m sorry… but I can’t talk to you about this. You’re just going to have to trust me. I… love him, Dad. I want to go back because I love him.”

  He sighed and dug some cash out of his wallet to pay their bill. “That’s the first time you’ve called me Dad and meant it. I guess it’s going to have to be enough.”

  The drive back to the ranch brought the easiest conversation they’d had to date. With animated and enthused honesty, she spoke about her love of the ranch, the gardens, the animals, and the people. She also insisted that she didn’t need any money. “I made enough this summer to finish my associate’s degree in December, then I’ll decide. Maybe I’ll look into a four-year school in Wyoming… but I don’t have any reason to make up my mind right now.”

  Her father listened carefully to her plans. “Your mother would have been really proud of you. She… she was a pretty special person herself, and I wish she’d gotten to see the amazing adult you’ve become.”

  She hesitated before asking, “What about my fa—I mean Grant? I know I loved him.”

  “I wasn’t very nice to him,” he said with true remorse. “The two of them had been close friends since grade school. They cared about each other a lot, but they were very different people by high school. Sarah was a popular and academically gifted girl. I was a football player on a team that won their division… and Grant…”

  His voice trailed off, but he finally finished. “Well, he liked music and video games. He was small and thin no matter how tall you remember him, but he stood up to me more than once about the way I’d treated Sarah. There were a few fights, but Grant definitely proved to be the better man. I hope someday you can meet his mom and dad. It broke their hearts when he left with Sarah, but staying in Delaware would have been a mistake for all of you. I think her father would have worn her down, and she would have terminated the pregnancy. She and Grant both wanted to have you in their life. For those two teenagers to bring you into this world was nothing short of a miracle, and Grant deserves a lot of credit.”

  Cloudcroft finally came into view through the bend in the trees, and her body relaxed for the first time all day. Dusk was close and the house lights twinkled peacefully against the backdrop of the distant mountains in that picture perfect moment before nighttime took control.

  Her father helped get her suitcases out of the trunk, and she took his hand. “You need to come in. You can’t drive all the way back to Jackson again.”

  He glanced up at the stone house. “No… I think it’s best if I head back tonight. I… It’s hard to share you, Sophia, and I don’t think I would be a very gracious loser here.”

  Without hesitating, she flung her arms around his neck and held on. His movement was tentative, but he returned the embrace, and their connection lasted a long while. When she pulled back, they both wiped away tears.

  “Thank you,” she said with true sincerity.

  “Yeah…” He dismissed her with a dubious laugh. “Thanks, Dad, for abandoning me for twenty-three years.”

  “No, I mean it,” she said with a stern frown. “Thank you for finding me, and thank you for understanding that right now, this is where I need to be. I promise I’ll come to Delaware at Christmas. We’ll make this work, Dad. I just found you, and I’m not going to lose you now.”

  He nodded slowly and kissed her cheek. “Goodbye, Sophia. I’ll hold you to that promise.”

  She waited until the car was out of sight before entering the familiar front door. Leaving the suitcases in the entrance hall, she took a moment to appreciate the beautiful heavy oak details and antique furniture nestled in the downstairs rooms before she turned toward the modern family wing. Typing in the password, the gentle click from the electronic doorknob gave her access to the kitchen, and the recognition that she belonged behind the locked door brought a truly grateful smile.

  The four Cloudcroft residents were quietly watching a baseball game but looked up quickly at her entrance. Bella was on her feet first. “Sophia! I knew you couldn’t leave us.” The girls wrapped themselves in a tearful embrace before Jack tapped Bella on the shoulder. “Let her breathe, Bel. She just got here. Don’t kill her.”

  Marcus’ gaze met hers as the rest of the room drifted from her focus. She was vaguely aware of Linc’s quiet kiss on her cheek as the others moved away. The sounds of Bella’s whine trailed behind. “I don’t want to go upstairs, Jack. I want to stay here.” Sophia laughed when she heard Bella’s indignant squeal, but her eyes never left Marcus’ powerful stare.

  “Why did you come back?” he said with a stern tone. “You had this all planned out.”

  The gruff dismissal was not the reception she’d expected, and a small bite of anger interrupted her serenity. “I wanted to be here. Aren’t you glad to see me?”

  “Why? Did Bella put pressure on you? I’ll tan her hide her if she did. She promised to let you make this decision on your own.”

  “She didn’t pressure me,” she said incredulously. “I’m a big girl, and I can make decisions by myself.” Suddenly, the trip back to Cloudcroft seemed shortsighted, and the slight tremor of fear that she’d made a terrible mistake pushed her to another level of anger, and she returned his scowl.

  They stared for a long moment when a small sparkle appeared that characterized the man she loved. After months of talking to him about everything and anything, she looked to the honest and open communication that formed their foundation. “Marcus, are you saying you don’t want me here? Did I misinterpret something?”

  His breath released in exasperation, and she finally recognized his level of tension. “Are you kidding? Of course I fucking want you here! I never wanted you to leave, but I had no right to stop you. I have faith in you and in our relationship. I just don’t understand why you came back.”

  She sighed and moved her own fingertip to his chin. “I came back because I love you, you dumbass. You, Jack, Linc, Bella, and Cloudcroft are my home. This week blessed me with a second family, but you guys are my first. I belong here, unless, of course, you don’t want me?”

  He remained frustratingly objective. “Are you sure, Sophia? Is this really what you want? I know you have the strength to do this if it’s important to you. We can make the long distance work. You don’t have to choose between us.”

  She grinned. “I had the strength to leave, Marcus, but I had the choice to come back. Isn’t that what the scene is all about? Making a choice that fits your needs, no matter what other people think? So what is it, can I stay or not?”

  For the first time in days, he shot her a grin. “Oh, you’re staying. I may never let you leave again though.”

  * * *

  Despite a little whining on her part, the Cloudcroft doms still insisted she follow through with her plans to finish the associate’s degree, and she reluctantly agreed. She fully understood that it was the right decision for her future, but the weeklong stays in Jackson were every bit as annoying as she’d expected.

  Their commitment grew even stronger as they took every possible opportunity to spend more time together. She arranged her schedule so her last class was over before noon on Friday, and she was home by dinner to take her place snuggled into Marcus’ side. She didn’t leave again until Monday morning at six. By the end of September, he was coming to Jackson to stay in her tiny dorm room on Tuesday nights until resort business demanded his return on Wednesday afternoon. The single bed in her closet-sized space provided a serious logist
ical problem for her giant-sized mate, but they made excellent use of the small space.

  Wherever they were, they held magical conversations about future dreams and goals. From quaint coffee shops to the soft couch in Cloudcroft’s elegant living room, they explored each other’s emotions with as much intensity as they had ever explored their bodies. She’d never understood anybody with as much depth as she knew Marcus, and she learned more about herself every day.

  When she was home for Thanksgiving, Marcus pulled her close. “I know we haven’t been together very long, but I really think we need to start talking about the future. A permanent future. We could get married at Cloudcroft, or the church in Marion or even do one of those destination weddings if that’s what you want.”

  A long minute elapsed when she couldn’t speak, and finally Marcus spoke dryly. “I’m not sure how to take this. Normally, when somebody talks about marriage, the other person at least responds.”

  She shook her head to refocus. “Well, you haven’t actually asked, so I don’t really have to respond, but I…”

  He glared, and she met his eyes with a deep smile. “Marcus Greene, I love you with everything in my heart. I’m looking forward to spending a lifetime with you, but I’m just not ready to talk about marriage right now. I’ve come a long way, but I have a ways to go before I can commit to my future. Can you just not ask me right now? Wait a few months, then you can really ask. And I mean you really need to do it right… romance… flowers… the whole bit, buddy.”

  With a smirk, his familiar hands ran across the nerves of her bottom, and he whispered conspiratorially, “That’s a plan, little girl.”

  She talked to the whole family about opening the kennels in the spring. “It will give me a job in the winter months too, and they’re far enough away from the house that they won’t bother the guests. It won’t interfere with my gardening, and I’ll still have time to help Jack with his paperwork so he can take on more horses to train. I promise I can do it all.”