Jessica's Secret

by Mia Wolfe

  Evan moved his hand in between the warmth of her thighs, careful to avoid touching her in the spot she needed most tending to, and began once more, “Now you have to be a good girl and ask nicely for what you want.”

  “Please… please, Sir, will you play with me?” she squirmed underneath his warm touch.

  In seconds flat he picked her up threw her face down on the bed, putting pressure on her lower back while lifting up her skirt to expose her bare bottom flesh. Jessica felt nervous and excited at being pinned down, and for the first time in what seemed like millennia, she wanted to experience the heights the Evan could take her to. Ready to relinquish herself to his will, she let the pleasure come only at his command.

  He ran his hand upwards from her thigh to her buttock, leaving a trail of fingertip prints as they pressed firmly into her velvety skin.

  “How sensitive to pain do you think you are?”

  “I don’t know.”

  An open palmed hand slapped her hard on her butt cheek as she felt the blood rushing to it and her flesh exploding with heat. Her body twitched with surprise and pain, her breathing became more rapid. He smoothed her bottom with his hand lovingly, then repeated the motion. Whack!

  “Ow.”

  Whack! Whack! Whack!

  She began to squirm underneath him.

  “You haven’t been a very honest girl lately, have you, ma petite?”

  “No, Sir,” she heaved.

  “Our understanding was that you would be forthcoming with me.”

  Whack! She lay against the bed, keenly aware sound of his hand against her flesh, filling the room and filling her ears, causing an eruption of sensation among her limbs, ecstatic with arousal and tense with nervous energy. The pain awoke and invigorated her senses.

  He glided his hand affectionately against her flaming bottom.

  “From now on I think we should be honest with one another. You belong to me now, and as mine you will adhere to some rules. You like having a structure because you feel safe with me and I can give you what you need.”

  He laid down on the bed, his chest, stomach and pelvis resting against her back. Jessica grew conscious of the imprint his cock was making on her exposed ass. His hand found his way to her neck as he trailed a bed of gentle kisses along her nape.

  “You’re my girl; your pleasure and body are mine my little dear. Tell me what you want.”

  She began to feel light and airy, small underneath his heavy weight, snug, excited at feeling him growing heavier and firmer, pulsating with sensations he wanted to give to her.

  “Please, Sir, I really want… I really want to have you inside me. Please fuck me, Sir.”

  He removed his pants and the sudden contact of his naked body on hers aroused her even more. She began to moan and writhe underneath him. She had never wanted anything so badly before. Perhaps it was the fact that he made her work for what she wanted that filled her with insatiable with lust for him. Perhaps it was her growing boredom and disgust with sleeping with people whom she was not attracted to. It felt so wonderful for her to finally be with someone whom she wanted to wake up to in the morning, whose mouth she loved to kiss, whose eyes filled her with contentment.

  Evan removed her red dress but left her red lace thong on. He secured a faux leather collar to her neck, led her down a long hallway to a sunroom. The room was equipped with floor-to-ceiling glass walls that overlooked the blazing sun’s reflection on the Gulf of Siesta Key. In the room was a piano, a large mirror, a queen bed with luxurious blue bedding on it. Seashell themed picture frames of places Evan had been to were placed strategically around the room – undoubtedly attesting to Evan’s love of traveling. In the middle of the room, a few feet away from the bed, stood a vibrating saddle machine that she had seen only in porn before. She gazed at him wide eyed after noticing the seat. Her lower lip was hanging slightly open, as she was rather surprised at this mechanical device in this open room overlooking the sea.

  “Get on,” Evan’s commanding voice filled the room.

  “You’re joking, right?”

  He pointed to the saddle, “If you want to come today, then be a good girl and listen. I want to watch your nonverbal behavior.”

  Still aroused from his hands sliding over her, and slightly thrilled from being exposed in a brightly lit room, Jessica made her way over to the saddle. Evan walked beside her and sat her firmly in place. He took a seat on the bed pressed a button on a remote. A leisurely, pulsating sensation began to stir underneath her. It felt unfamiliar to have an entire mass of weight underneath her send such vibrations throughout her body.

  “You are such a beautiful girl, ma petite. Your breasts are perfect. I love watching you squirm for me.”

  Her thighs, vulva, and clitoris all began to feel warm from the sensations. She felt shy and exposed underneath his eyes; she stared directly at the ocean as she sensations began to overwhelm her. Direct eye contact was too much for her to bear, as it created too many intense feelings inside her that she did not yet feel ready to take on.

  His voice once again filled the room, “Tell me who you belong to.”

  “You, Sir.”

  The vibrations became louder and harder. Tiny trickles of sweat began to form on her brow and shoulders as her muscles tensed from the motions of the saddle, sending her back and forth and up and down. The vibrating, flesh-like material vigorously reverberated against her clitoris, sending waves of arousal through her.

  Evan watched her muscles begin to tense more and more, “I love it when you come for me, ma petite. You’re such a good, sweet girl. Would you like to come tonight?”

  “Yes, please, I really… really would.” She slowly drew out each word in between breaths.

  She looked over at him with a yearning gaze, her eyes begging him to come to her and touch her, to make her feel alive. She was used to the mechanical sexual motions of sex work and what she really desperately wanted was to feel psychologically and physically connected to someone. Evan noticed the spread of slight distress over her face and walked over to her, taking her face in his hands, he gave her one adoring kiss. He soon began a trail of kisses on her collarbone, neck, ear; his velvety fingers explored the length of her collarbone, spine, breasts, and erect nipples. The blood in her veins rose and she heaved up and down, between his kisses, muttered, “I really… wish… you were inside me.”

  “Mm,” he groaned as he squeezed her breasts, “I want to fill you with my cock.”

  “Oh God, please,” she panted in between his fervent kisses, “Please do – I want you so badly. Fuck, I’m getting close.”

  He lowered the pressure on the saddle as he placed his hand on her neck, creating slight pressure. Looking down at her, he noticed her subservient expression, her eyes full of adoration for him who seemed like her sun. He took out his firm cock that she thought about often. So perfect, she thought to herself. A solid eight inches long and very thick in the middle, with a large mushroom head, and beautiful artistic veins along the sides. She liked the amount of pubic hair on him as he kept it neatly trimmed. She liked Evan not only for the magical quality of his words but also for his delightful penis.

  “It’s so pretty,” she smiled gleefully at him. Jessica leaned in and her lips touched the warmth of his tip which was salty and wet with precum.

  “Mmm,” she moaned as she squirmed on the saddle, taking her tongue and trailing it around his cock, in a circular motion, tasting his smooth, soft skin.

  Evan’s hands gripped the top of her head and he thrust himself a few inches in her mouth, making contact with her tongue underneath him and the roof of her mouth encompassing his cock entirely. She looked up at him with doe eyes as she seductively slid it in and out, going deeper each time, feeling wetter with each vibrating motion despite Evan having lowered the pressure, with the intent to delay her orgasm so that it would be more intense.

  “Just like that, take it all in, you’re such a good girl – I love looking at you with a mouthful of my coc
k.”

  Jessica relished with delight at the sounds coming from Evan’s mouth – low guttural moans of sheer ecstasy. She handled his penis with the utmost care using her soft lips and tongue. She loved the feel of his warmth and sticky fluid in her mouth, and her clitoris was on fire.

  “Sir, if we keep up like this,” she couldn’t finish.

  He pulled out of her mouth and squeezed her breast, hard, “Not quite yet.”

  She felt distressed – she wanted to orgasm so badly but she also wanted to wait. Being at Evan’s mercy created a feeling of intense loyalty and arousal that she had never experienced before. She wanted him to command her body to do what he wished. He walked over behind the straddle and with one swift motion, grabbed her by the hair and led her to the piano where he bent her forward so that she was laying halfway on it. He bound her hands against the small of her back so that she lay naked on the piano, her bare ass on display.

  “Tell me what you want, slut.”

  “Please fuck me, Sir.”

  “Mm, good, but sounds a little standard,” he walked behind her and teased her with his cock, sliding it along her folds and lips, rubbing her clit suggestively, making her want to cry out for it.

  “Oh God, please, PLEASE! I really, really, really want to feel you inside me. It’s all I think about!”

  He slid one-third of the way in; she was firmly locked in place, and this really intensified her arousal. She felt that she would entirely explode, quite literally explode from all the pleasurable sensations incapacitating her. He continued to tease her by sliding his thickness partially in and then out.

  At this point Jessica could not think anymore. Evan teased her pussy, sliding in and out. Once he was halfway in, Jessica felt herself expanding to accommodate the girth of his cock. The stretching sensation made her moan.

  “So.. nice,” she muttered – she felt utterly winded and unable to speak, “so close.”

  She felt his forceful hands clamp tightly around her wrists as he submerged his pulsating cock deep inside her, where she had wanted him to have him for so long.

  “Oh God!”

  He kissed and bit her shoulders and her neck; the intensity of his thrusting increased as she felt him swell and grow inside her. She enjoyed the degradation of being shoved onto a cold, hard piano as Evan relentlessly plowed into her from behind – growing wetter until she felt their liquid stickiness down the back of her thighs, in between her legs – making it easier for Evan’s thick girth to slide in and out of her tightness.

  “I’m gonna,” a loud moan trailed off her thought as her thighs begin to shake against him, “please lemme cum!”

  “Come for me, baby,” he dictated with his lips firmly against her ear and her tangled, sticky mess of a hair bun, as she let herself go entirely and melted into his firm grip – her legs began to really shake.

  “I’m going to fill you with my cum,” those words sent her entirely over the edge as she gave out one last loud cry and shook in his arms, unable to feel her legs. He pumped and thrust inside her with his strength and she shook against him as he piled into her.

  “Deeper,” she barely managed to whisper with his hand around her throat. Evan exploded inside of her, filling her insides entirely with his warm seed as he heaved deep breaths into her neck.

  “I love having your cum inside me,” she breathlessly whispered.

  “Oh Christ, baby.” Evan took a few seconds to come back to Earth.

  Chapter 12-Guilt

  Once their time in Florida was up, life returned to the somewhat usual routine for Jessica. She began to see clients again but there seemed to be some tension within her. It was wrong to lead Evan on, all the while knowing what she was and not telling him, but she could not fathom bringing herself to it. It was the one secret she wanted to take to the crematorium. That was her worst fear – someone in her life inadvertently finding out what she did – something that very few in society seemed to accept – something that was as old as time itself.

  By a whim of the universe, Evan had shown up in her life without warning, right when Jessica thought the pieces were falling back into place gradually. She did not want to give up sex work – this she knew. It was not fair to Evan that she was unable to give him what he wanted, a commitment of sort. Jessica held off on showing too much interest, although she was quite fond of his company. She tried hard to suppress the feelings that were beginning to creep up on her.

  “It’s really bizarre,” Evan said as they were lying in bed together reading, “You’re the first girl I’ve ever been with who doesn’t want a relationship. Usually, the guy is the one who tries to avoid a commitment, while the girl is eager to have a title of girlfriend.”

  Jessica wasn’t sure what to say to him, so she remained silent, the guilt slowly eating away at her.

  “Do you think it is possible that you might not have processed the divorce?”

  Jessica thought for a moment, carefully choosing her reply, “Anything is possible.”

  So on it went – the continuation of romance and peril between them.

  The part of her she wanted to awaken was the sexual. Evan had taken her by the collar, literally and opened her up to new heights, stimulated every fiber of her being with his salacious words and taut techniques. He had given her the greatest gift of all, being so attuned to what she needed the most, which, incidentally, was not entirely sexual.

  “You know what I like about you?” he asked her one day as she returned his gaze, “I like that you accept me as I am. You don’t try to change me. I don’t feel that I have to be any other way than I naturally am, and that’s a nice feeling.”

  “That’s so sweet,” she smiled charmingly at him.

  If you only knew what I was, she thought to herself, but you can never know what I am, because if you did, you would never ever think of me in the same way again.

  Chapter 13 – Exposed

  One evening Evan came to Jessica’s apartment to spend the night. Always mindful of her environment, she took great care to remove anything that would look suspicious. Jessica took meticulous measures to ensure no one would ever find out her shocking secret.

  On this particular evening Evan was acting suspicious, which made Jessica wonder if he was really suspicious or her own paranoid mind was creating this awkward tension.

  At three a.m. as they lay awake still, Jessica asked him, “Is something going on with you? You’re acting really weird.”

  He stirred and laughed, then stretched. He didn’t say anything.

  “Hello? What is up with you?”

  “Are you sure you want to talk about this at three a.m.? It’s a topic for long discussion.”

  “Yes, just tell me already.”

  Evan hesitated, then began, “The first thing I want to tell you about myself is that when I was eighteen I lost my virginity. My friend took me to a club in Austria but it was a special kind of club where the girls there are prostitutes. Two of them came up to us and I didn’t know what we were getting into but I went along and that’s how it happened.”

  “Aw, that’s nice, you’re sex worker friendly,” Jessica said, “but what does that have to do with anything? I don’t care about your sexual past.”

  Evan took a slow, tense breath.

  ”The other thing is… that,” Evan paused, “I know you’re a full service sex worker, and the truth is, I don’t know how I feel about that.”

  Jessica felt like a bomb had just exploded inside her – thousands of needles and pins pricked her flesh – her stomach seemed like it was filling with some poisonous liquid that was slowly eating away her skin – waves of nausea crashed against her as the world became bleak and she felt her throat constricting as if being swallowed wholly by a giant snake.

  For the first time ever in her life she was entirely clueless, entirely unprepared for what had just happened, taken aback to a point of stupefaction, disbelief, surrealism. Was this really happening?

  “I don’t know what you’
re talking about,” she managed to reply.

  She wanted to hide under the covers and be swallowed by the underground, to lay encompassed by the dark forever, no sights nor sounds to ever remind her of those words coming out of Evan’s mouth,

  “Unfortunately there is no guidebook for what to do when you find out your girlfriend is a prostitute.”

  “Obviously someone stole my pictures and used them without my consent.”

  She couldn’t feel her legs.

  “I know that it was you, and in retrospect, this explains some things such as why you can only see me at certain times, your vast sexual knowledge, the number of showers you take, all your sex toys and condoms, unusual items like dental dams, and you always have a bunch of cash. I did wonder how could afford to live in LA with only a part time job.”

  She pulled the covers stiffly against her head.

  “Jess?” he reached over to touch her.

  “Please… don’t.”

  Each breath seemed too painful and exerting. She did not want to be present in the moment to witness her deepest fear come to fruition, by the person who mattered to her most.

  “Jess,” he placed his hand lovingly on the mattress covering the top of her head. His weight soothed her although she felt unworthy of his touch.

  “Are you concerned that I see you differently? This doesn’t change any of our experiences that we’ve shared. All of the good times and bonding we’ve done is still the same. Our attachment is still the same, maybe closer now.”

  “How did you find out?” she managed to mutter, the small air space blazing with the heat of her desperate breath.

  “I found your blog. From that I found your ad. How did you pick your name, by the way?”

  “It’s a book by Balzac, about androgyny that I like.”

  “Interesting. Most people would not assume that prostitutes would read Balzac.”

  He began to pull the covers from underneath her. She held on to them firmly in place.

  “Come out,” he beckoned.

  “No, I can’t look at your face.”