A Wallflower at the Highland Court: A Slow Burn Highlander Romance

by Barclay, Celeste

  Maude’s mouth formed an “o” that made Kieran’s cock twitch. He was already struggling with saying goodnight without being reminded that no part of him wanted to leave. He kissed Maude once more, taking advantage of her open mouth to sweep his tongue around hers. He accepted her attention, but they both pulled apart before things advanced. Maude opened the door and peered both ways down the passageway. She counted to twenty before she stepped aside. Kieran stood in the doorway for another count of twenty before bussing her cheek and slipping away.

  Chapter Ten

  Maude watched the tempest that was Madeline MacLeod storm into the Great Hall. Maude knew Kieran must have spoken to her because Madeline hadn’t been in such a state when they gathered in the chapel for morning Mass. No. This thunderstorm had developed far more recently. Maude attempted to stay out of Madeline’s line of sight, hoping to avoid acting as the woman’s outlet. She wasn’t to be so fortunate. Madeline’s sight narrowed onto Maude, who sat between Arabella and Blair. Maude had sought her sister’s company that morning. She’d confessed to everything that happened between her and Kieran. She didn’t hide, or rather downplay, anything as she had with Arabella. She felt guilty sharing more with Blair than Arabella when they considered themselves sisters of the heart. But some things should only be discussed with someone who shared the same blood. Blair had been supportive, if not a little smug, when Maude described everything Kieran said about her body. Maude feared Blair would judge her for wantonness, but her sister’s only response was “I told you so.”

  “Good morn, Lady Madeline,” Cairren Kennedy made the fatal error.

  “What’s good aboot a morning when your brother has sold you like a slave?” Madeline bemoaned.

  Neither Blair nor Arabella showed any response, Maude having forewarned them. Maude kept her eyes down as she poured honey into her porridge, using it as an excuse not to look at Madeline.

  “I beg your pardon,” Cairren responded.

  “My profligate brother has betrothed me to the fourth son of Laird Matheson. Can you believe that? The fourth son!”

  Maude kept her eyes averted, but her mouth twitched. It would seem Madeline wasn’t upset about the betrothal or even that it was to a Matheson. It was that it was to the youngest son. She believed she should marry a laird or at least an heir.

  “Shouldn’t he retire to a monastery somewhere? Couldn’t he have the decency to disappear? Then I couldn’t marry him.” She pouted when she finished.

  Despite her rant, Madeline spied the small upturn of Maude’s mouth and turned her temper toward Maude. She leaned across the table, making it impossible for Maude to ignore her. Madeline pulled Maude’s bowl away from her, removing Maude’s excuse to not engage.

  “What’re you smiling aboot, you fat dowd? At least someone has agreed to marry me. You shall rot as a spinster until your bones grow brittle. I may not like who my brother chose, but at least my brother’s seen to my future. Your father couldn’t be bothered. He’s happy to be rid of you here. I’ll have a mon while you’ll have naught but your fingers,” she hissed. Several of the ladies drew back at Madeline’s crude reference.

  “Madeline Eloise MacLeod!” The bellow was followed by the pounding of a fist on the table. Kieran marched over to their table, glanced at Maude, then hauled his sister away with an arm around her waist. Maude never imagined anything could enrage Kieran so much, and it frightened her. She wanted to follow them to reassure Kieran that Madeline’s words had done no real harm and to be sure Madeline survived, but she knew she couldn’t. It would only make the scene worse, and she was certain Madeline would spew more foul things even if Maude came to her defense.

  They conducted the remainder of the meal in stunned silence with only the occasional whisper of questions about whether Kieran would whip her, exile her home, or throttle her. Maude prayed it was none of those. She didn’t want to come between brother and sister. Kieran may swear now that he would choose Maude, but she didn’t want to test the bonds of family. Or worse, be what severed them.

  * * *

  The ringing in Kieran’s ears didn’t end even when they reached his sister’s chambers. She’d flailed and ranted until he dropped her on the stairs, letting her believe he would allow her to fall. He’d given her the option of coming quietly or going over his shoulder where he could swat her arse until his hand stung. He’d never threatened to raise his hand to a woman before, and much like he would never let her fall down the stairs, he wouldn’t follow through with his pledge. When they arrived at Madeline’s chamber, he swung the door open so hard that it smashed against the wall and some of the plaster crumbled. He flung her into the room and slammed the door shut, making the wall rattle.

  “I have never been so ashamed of anyone in my life. You are a disgrace to the laird’s family and to our clan. You were naught short of a vulgar bitch in front of half the court. Do you realize every table surrounding you witnessed your tantrum? Do you realize that turning your viperous tongue on an innocent woman only shamed you more? Do you realize, little sister, that you shall never, ever show your face in that Great Hall again? I may forbid it while you’re still unmarried, but you can be certain the queen will forbid it once you are wed. What will you say to your husband if he can’t present you at court?”

  “That this is your fault!” Madeline stalked away before picking up the pitcher and hurling it across the chamber.

  “Oh, no, you don’t, princess.” Kieran’s fingers bit into her wrists so deeply that he was sure there would be marks, but he kept her from lobbing the basin too. “Your theatrics have never worked on me. Your performance, for that’s what it was, was for the sake of your so-called friends and your hangers-on. But you went way too far. Rather than sympathy, you shall receive naught but scorn. You were angry when we left here and may have worked yourself into a lather before reaching the Great Hall, but that display was because of your narcissism, and it shall come home to rue. Pack your belongings. We leave within the hour. What doesn’t fit within a satchel I might send to you later.”

  Madeline sneered at him and crossed her arms, tapping her foot. Kieran took a deep breath, expanding his chest to its full breadth before leaning over her.

  “You will do as I say this minute, or it won’t be marriage you’re heading to. It’ll be Inchcailleoch Priory for you, where you can take not only a vow of poverty but one of silence.” Madeline took a step back, at last realizing she’d pushed her brother too far. It was rare that he lost his temper, but it fizzled if Madeline waited in silence for long enough. She wasn’t so confident that he would forgive her this time.

  “I’m sorry for my behavior in front of everyone and for my uncouth words.” If only Madeline had stopped there. “But it was just Maude Sutherland. She means naught.”

  Kieran’s hand shot out, but he stopped himself before it went around Madeline’s throat. She knew what he intended, and her eyes widened in shock.

  “You’re involved with her. Is she your mistress?” Once again, if only Madeline knew when to stop. Instead she muttered, “That little slut.”

  “The wedding is off.” Kieran grasped his sister’s chin but was careful not to be rough. “See me and hear me well. You will go to the convent. I will make your excuses to the Mathesons and say you have a calling of faith. You’ve insulted the woman I will marry for the last time. I heard you on the terrace a few days before I returned home. I’ve heard aboot the other things you’ve said since then. It was only for Maude’s sake that I didn’t say aught. I didn’t trust you not to be vindictive, but you have proven you can’t be trusted to show your face in good company. I can’t risk you unleashing this behavior on any of the Matheson women, especially not the wives of the laird’s sons. Forget packing. You need not bring aught.”

  “You can’t be serious, Kieran. I didn’t know. I would have kept such things to myself if I had.”

  “And that’s why you still can’t be trusted. You don’t see the sin in having those thoughts. You just don
’t want to be caught. You’ve far exceeded Mother’s and Abigail’s pettiness. You have a cruel streak that I won’t make others suffer. You are a laird’s daughter and a laird’s sister. You have had the best in life, yet for all your supposed loyalty to our clan, you can’t see how your actions harm our people. Do you understand what would happen to Assynt if the Sutherlands, Sinclairs, and Mackays rally together to avenge the slight you’ve given Maude? What if the Mackenzies join with the Sutherlands? That would decimate Assynt. Not to mention the Mackenzies are allied with the Mathesons. If you married into that clan, where would that put them if they’re allied to both us and the Mackenzies? The Isle of Lewis might be safe, but we have clan members on the mainland for whom I’m responsible. You think of no one but yourself. And I’m through. You’re too great a liability.”

  Tears streamed down Madeline’s face as she listened to Kieran’s accusations. She knew they were all true. She’d arrived at court and gained attention from the male courtiers while her sense of style and confidence enabled her to rise in the social hierarchy of the ladies-in-waiting. The taste of power brought out the worst in her, but she hadn’t cared so long as she remained on top. She saw all that crumbling before her. She had one last plea.

  “You’d choose her over me, your own sister?” Her voice trembled as she wiped her nose with the back of her hand.

  “This isn’t aboot Maude. You could have just as easily unleashed on one of the other ladies today, or you might target any one of them once Maude leaves. You are no longer the lass I knew. The woman you have become is not one I wish to have in our clan. Even now, you’re attempting to manipulate me.”

  “Fine.” Madeline’s tears stopped with the abruptness with which they started. “Send me to the convent and see how well that goes. They’ll force you to retrieve me within a fortnight.”

  “You underestimate the nuns’ experience with unwilling novices. It’s not called the “Isle of Old Women” for naught. Once there, no one leaves, and no old woman will tolerate your tantrums.” Kieran ran a hand through his hair and stepped back. “Madeline, you’re my sister, and naught can change that. That’s why it pains me so much to see who you’ve become. You’re unrecognizable to me. I wish I could say I’ll send you to the convent and give you the chance to repent and change your ways before returning home, but the way you’re trying to manipulate me now makes me fear that I can never trust you again. I will marry Maude, and I will take her home to Stornoway. I will not take her some place where she must suffer your wrath any time you’re displeased or merely for the sake of you feeling superior.”

  “So, you are choosing her!” The tears began anew, but it was in truth this time. The brother she had once adored and idolized now couldn’t stand her. What was worse, he not only had no affection for her, but he bore great affection for a woman who couldn’t be more her opposite. She swallowed and could only force out a whisper. “I suppose this is how I must make Maude feel. Wretched and unlovable. It’s rather miserable and painful. God, how this hurts.”

  Madeline sank to the floor on her knees as her shoulders shook between her sobs. Kieran squatted on his haunches and once more tilted her chin up. He caught a glimpse in her eyes of the young girl she had once been before their mother’s influence took hold. Their mother was snide and condescending, but she lacked the meanness that Madeline possessed. He’d worried more than once if he was selfish to want to bring Maude home to a family who might be little different from what she’d always experienced, but he believed his influence as laird and a fresh start would be enough to make Maude welcome. From there, her kindness and warm heart would win his clan over.

  “It most likely is, lass. Now I’ll give you a moment to change your kirtle, put on your riding boots, and gather your cloak.” Kieran took a piece of vellum and the quill with the inkstand that sat on the table beside the window. He stepped into the passageway and scrawled a note for Maude.

  Buttercup,

  I must leave again, this time to take Madeline to Inchcailleoch Priory. I’m calling off the wedding. She’s demonstrated that not only can’t I trust her here, but I should worry about how she will behave with a new clan. I fear her behavior won’t improve and she will cause strife with Matheson’s other sons’ wives. She’s tried to manipulate me into forgiving her, but while I might eventually, I must also think about the clan. She need only say the wrong thing to the wrong person once, and she could cause a feud. She has much growing up to do. Perhaps a life dedicated to prayer will assist her. At the very least, some time spent in austerity might make her appreciate what she never has before.

  I shall miss you until I return and have you in my arms again. The memory of the taste of your lips on mine will be my succor. Even if it is only a couple days. It shall take me two days, most likely, to settle her there and to ensure her dowry is transferred to the convent while restitution is paid to the Mathesons for breaking the betrothal before I even formalized it.

  When I return, I shall make my intentions clear to all and sundry. There will be no hiding that I’m courting you. That I will marry you.

  Yours always,

  Turtledove.

  PS I didn’t have the chance to say it, but your hair looks lovely today. I believe I’ll need to have several kertches made to keep such a treasure all to myself.

  He folded and sealed the parchment before knocking on Madeline’s door. When she called to him, he entered her chamber. He scanned the chamber and saw that nothing besides the shattered pottery was out of place. He returned the ink and quill to the table then warmed a square of wax with the candle. He pressed his signet ring and was careful to ensure the markings were clear.

  “Let’s be on our way. It isn’t far.”

  “It could be all the way on the moon for how close I will feel to the life I’ve known.”

  Kieran didn’t disagree with her. They left the chamber, but paused when he summoned a page, giving him explicit instructions that the missive was to go to no one’s hands but Maude’s. Not her friend, her sister, or her father. It was for her alone.

  Chapter Eleven

  Maude was in the queen’s solar when the page delivered Kieran’s missive. She was certain she blushed as she read and reread the note thrice. She felt sorry for Madeline, but she also understood Kieran’s decision. Her parents had drilled it into her, as well as her brother and sister, that their behavior would always reflect upon the clan. They, as the laird’s children, would always be held to a higher standard and that they should remember their duty to the clan in all their decisions and actions. She didn’t envy Kieran or Madeline, but the woman had brought this upon herself. Maude feared the reaction that would come with Kieran’s outburst, but while her table remained quiet, she caught the comments floating from others. It seemed Madeline wasn’t as well liked as she and her friends would have everyone believe. But Maude also understood it was easy for others to stand in judgement after the fact. Even as she sat embroidering, she worried that Laurel would be her next antagonist, but the woman had been remarkably demure since Madeline’s abrupt exit.

  Maude was about to ask the queen if she might excuse her to find her father. She wanted to keep him abreast of why Kieran disappeared, but Laurel approached first.

  “May I sit?” she asked.

  Maude nodded and gestured toward the other half of the window seat.

  “I owe you an apology many times over. I said hurtful things to you and aboot you and knew it was wrong even as the words spewed from my mouth.” Laurel looked around to see who watched them. When she was convinced no one was paying too much attention, she lowered her voice further. “Madeline discovered something aboot my brother I wish to remain secret. She promised she wouldn’t say aught if I supported her among the ladies. It became all too easy to cut you to the quick when Madeline made it, or rather you, seem so insignificant. When the others joined in or at least latched on, the power of being popular became addictive. You know I’m the youngest of five sisters. I loved having pe
ople pay attention to me after always being the bairn of the family. The one my mother was too tired to remember, and the one my father begrudged having to pay yet another dowry for. I made myself feel better at your expense, and I was so deep into following Madeline’s lead in fear of what she might say aboot my brother, that I sinned without remorse. I offer you my heartfelt contrition, Maude. I know these are but words, but they are true.”

  Maude watched Laurel as she spoke. The woman endeavored to maintain eye contact, but at times she struggled and looked down at her hands which she clenched in her lap. Maude was wasn’t prepared to trust Laurel’s sincerity yet, but she wouldn’t throw the woman’s apology back in her face. Time would tell whether Laurel had reformed, but for now, Maude could be gracious. It cost her nothing.

  “I appreciate your honesty and your apology.” She also didn’t have to gild the lily by being effusive with her thanks. Laurel nodded once when she realized nothing more would be forthcoming from Maude. She returned to her own sewing, and Maude approached the queen.

  “Your Grace, a missive arrived that will concern my father. May I be excused to look for him?”

  “I hope naught is wrong. He will be in the lists at this hour.”

  “Aye, Your Grace.” Maude was already aware her father would be training. If he wasn’t in meetings with the king in the morning, then he was outside swinging his sword. He might be well into his fourth decade, but he was just as strong and hardy as a man half his age. He reminded his own guardsmen of that frequently. She wound her way through the castle until she stepped outside. It was an unusually warm day, and the sun was brilliant. It was a day that would have been nice spent strolling through the gardens with Kieran. Shading her eyes with her hand, Maude picked her way to the lists, but stopped well before stepping foot into the training ground. She looked for anyone she might recognize near the boundary or anyone she could ask to find her father. There was no one. Maude knew better than to walk onto the field while men were swinging swords and axes, no matter how dull those weapons might be. She also knew she needed to speak to her father sooner rather than later. Maude did the only thing she could think of. She whistled the signal her father used when he wanted to summon the men from the lists. The shrill sound traveled across the field bringing most of the men to an abrupt halt. They looked around until she whistled again, this time not as loudly. She recognized her father, who jogged toward her with the Sutherland contingent behind him.