A Wallflower at the Highland Court: A Slow Burn Highlander Romance

by Barclay, Celeste

  “I will order them to cease ignoring you,” Kieran growled as they sat together in his solar. He disliked it, but Agatha had become his informant for how his clan treated his bride. The housekeeper had always known all that occurred in the keep and had often shared pieces of information that aided Kieran in the running of the clan. When Maude refused to discuss events that upset her, he turned to Agatha. It shocked him to learn the unkind things said about Maude. He suspected she was aware of the gossip but was thankful that she never heard it, or at least she denied hearing it.

  “You can’t order them to like me, Kier. They either will, or they won’t.”

  “I can order them to respect you.”

  “They do, or at least my position within the clan. No one is rude or disrespectful to my face, because I’m your wife.”

  “But they don’t respect the tireless effort you put into improving the clan. The keep has never looked better, our finances are steadily improving thanks to your thriftiness, and their lives are better for it.”

  “They don’t see those small things. To them, I am someone new who has taken over from a woman many of them have known most of their lives.”

  “A woman who hasn’t done a thimbleful of what you’ve accomplished in two moons.”

  “Leave be, turtledove. They’ll come around. It hasn’t been that long.”

  “It doesn’t mean I have to like it,” Kieran muttered as he lifted Maude onto his lap from where she perched on the side of his desk. They grew closer each day, relying upon one another’s knowledge and experience to run their clan, and their intimacy grew as they learned what brought them to ecstasy. She ceased their conversation as she often did with a searing kiss that wiped Kieran’s mind of anything but his need to join with her. He ran his hands over her ribs and breasts as she squirmed to get closer. When she shifted to straddle him, he laid her on his desk. He rested on one forearm while his other hand found the hem of Maude’s kirtle. He inched it up until his hand found the thatch of curls between her legs. Maude’s head rested on the tabletop as Kieran slid a finger along her seam.

  “Kier,” she whispered on a moan.

  She drew him in for a kiss as his finger entered her. The sensation drove Maude to intensify their kiss as she rocked her hips to meet Kieran’s questing finger. He eased a second finger into her as he worked the sensitive flesh. Her soft mewling spurred him to use his thumb to circle her nub. As they kissed, Maude reached between them and tucked his plaid into his belt. Her hand cupped his length before guiding his cock to her entrance.

  “I don’t want to hurt you. This wood cannot be comfortable,” he murmured as he tried to hold in the groan and rein in his need to thrust into her.

  “I’ve ached for you to be inside me ever since you settled me on your lap. Kieran, I need you. The wood won’t cool the way my body yearns for you.”

  Kieran seized her mouth in a brutal kiss that signaled the onslaught of their passion. He plunged into her over and over as she nipped at his lips and clenched her fingers around his backside. He grasped her hip in one hand and raised her arms above her head with the other. Her moans encouraged him to continue when he would have slowed.

  “I don’t know why I feel like this, Kieran. It wasn’t that long ago that I had no idea being with a mon would make me so needy and so brazen, but I can’t hold back.”

  “You don’t have to, mo ghaol. I want you, need you, just as much. I don’t think I’ll ever get enough of you. And you have no idea how hearing your desire makes me feel. I hope that it never goes away.”

  “You don’t think me loose or unladylike for this?” Maude panted as Kieran continued to surge into her.

  “God, no. I’m lucky to have a wife who enjoys me and perhaps wants me as much as I want her.” They kissed again before Kieran leaned back to surge into her over and over. His hand kneaded her breast, and Maude covered it, guiding him to a firmer hold.

  “I didn’t know what it meant at the time, but ever since our first kiss, my body seems different.” Maude murmured.

  “I’m different, too. I’ve never felt like this before. I still marvel at how it never used to be like this.” Kieran realized what he said after the words left his mouth. He expected Maude to push him away after mentioning his past while he was hilt-deep within her. But she released a purely feminine growl before pulling him down for another kiss. Maude took control of the kiss, and Kieran’s body raced to the precipice, but he refused to tumble over the edge into ecstasy without her. “Buttercup, I’m too close. I need to slow down.”

  “I don’t want this to be slow, Kier. Hard,” Maude struggled to say each word as Kieran thrust into her, and her thoughts faded. Before he was able to stop himself, his release consumed him. He slammed into Maude over and over until she bit into his shoulder to keep from screaming her own climax. He marveled at how her inner muscles spasmed around him, clinging to him, while her hips still rocked. Despite knowing his body was spent, he continued to thrust. Maude’s head thrashed from side to side as her body held her captive. Kieran pulled the sleeve of her kirtle down far enough to free her breast and began suckling her hard. The sounds of Maude’s moans were a symphony to him as he suckled, alternating breasts.

  “Turtledove, don’t stop. So close again.”

  Kieran had no intention of quitting before he watched Maude come apart in his arms again. He shifted and circled his hips, making Maude bite down on his shoulder, his leine doing little to protect him. Her entire body went rigid before going lax. They lay together on the desk, panting. Maude mindlessly stroked his hair and back as he smattered kisses over her cheek, jaw, and neck. They lay there together until their breathing returned to normal, and Kieran withdrew. Maude’s whimper of disappointment matched his own feelings. Their lovemaking abated the heat and need that sparked between them, and they floated back to reality. A sound outside the door drew Kieran’s attention. He crossed the room but checked that Maude had covered herself before flinging the door open. Adeline and Abigail stood on the other side, unprepared for Kieran to catch them, so they failed to whisper.

  “She sounds like a two-bit whore,” Adeline sneered. “He does better between Maggie’s thighs than the sausages hiding beneath her skirts.”

  “Mother!” Kieran roared. He prayed that, while his mother hadn’t whispered, her low voice wouldn’t carry to Maude, but Maude’s sharp intake of breath echoed across the room. He looked back at his wife and saw the color leach from her face. “You go too far. I haven’t touched Maggie or any other woman since before I met Maude. How dare you insinuate, nay state, otherwise? When will you accept that I love my wife?”

  “Never. You’re infatuated with the chit because she lets you rut on her like a bitch in heat.”

  “Leave!” Kieran’s hand gripped the door while the other fisted to keep from throttling his mother. Abigail looked among the three faces with a mean-spirited smile that reveled in Maude’s humiliation.

  “Mother wouldn’t have a point if the entire keep didn’t have to listen to you two morning, noon, and night. At least with Maggie, you’re discreet and don’t do it where everyone can listen.”

  “Stop speaking as though there is aught still between me and Maggie. There isn’t and never will be.”

  “If you say so, son. Eventually, you’ll get your broodmare with child, and then what will you do with that insatiable appetite? You’ll get your heir and your spare off her and then come to your senses. At least Maggie has the good graces not to beam and glow after a good tupping.”

  “It’s against my better judgment that I’ve allowed you and Abigail to remain despite your abominable behavior toward Maude. I never knew you had such a crass tongue. You disgrace yourself and your position as a lady speaking in such a manner. Retire to your chamber and do not let me see your face until morn.”

  “You’re sending me to my chamber like some errant wean? I think not. I’m still your mother.”

  “And I’m your laird. I warned you that you’d join Mad
eline at the priory if you tested me. I’ll begin the arrangements in the morning.”

  “You wouldn’t dare. The clan will despise her even more if you send me away. Do you think they’ll accept you choosing a woman better suited to a tavern wench over both your sister and your mother? They’ll lose all respect for you. They might even chase her away from Stornoway.” Something malicious twinkled in Adeline’s eyes that made Kieran pause. He feared she might harm Maude if he reacted out of anger.

  “Retire to your chamber as I said. I will consider what I’ll do with the both of you after I consult my wife.”

  Kieran didn’t wait for a response before swinging the door closed. He was at Maude’s side in a handful of paces. She stood shaken and pale, tremors vibrating against him as he held her. She sobbed as she had the night he met her, and just as he had been then, he was at a loss for what to say, so he cooed nonsensical words as he offered his presence as a balm to her injured spirit. She clung to him as she cried into his chest and remained inconsolable until there were no more tears left to stream from her eyes. She wiped them away but failed to wipe away the pounding headache.

  “I think I shall lie down until the evening meal,” she rasped.

  “I’ll join you,” Kieran offered, but Maude shook her head. She’d never declined his comfort until that day, and he worried about the vacant look in her eyes.

  “I need a little while by myself,” she murmured as she pulled away. Kieran walked to the door with her, but she shook her head once more.

  “At least let me see you to our chamber and tuck you in,” he reasoned.

  “No. I’d like to be alone now.” Maude didn’t look at him before opening the door and slipping into the passageway. Kieran stood watching her walk away and had a paralyzing fear that she might walk away for good one of these days.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Maude slipped her gown off and climbed into bed after pulling together the window covers. She allowed the tears to begin once more as her hope for ever reaching a truce with Kieran’s family gave way. She mourned the loss of companionship that never took root. She mourned her loneliness as she accepted she would live isolated from everyone but Kieran, Agatha, and Adam. The housekeeper and her son had become her only allies. She had impressed the steward with her head for numbers from the very first time they took inventory. Agatha praised her for her efforts, but despite offering an ear, Maude wasn’t ready to trust anyone at Stornoway. She’d even kept her fears and hurt hidden from Kieran, too ashamed to admit to the things she heard or that she failed to overcome how much they hurt. She refused to admit weakness before him, but she feared she wouldn’t be able to control her tears. She feared now that they started, they might never end. Temptation to write to her family and beg them to take her home carved a larger place in her mind each day, and as she laid in bed, she forced herself to refrain from pulling out a parchment and penning a missive asking them to rescue her. It was only the painful idea of being apart from Kieran that kept her from doing it. She allowed herself to drift off to sleep, the only escape from the onslaught of doubt, self-recrimination, and hurt.

  Hours later, her eyes burned and itched as she pried them open. She reached around in the dark for the flint and candle on her bedside table. As her hand swept the surface, she didn’t find the figurine that had taken pride of place on the nightstand. She scrambled off the bed and lit the candle before dropping to her knees to look beside the table and behind it before looking beneath the bed. She slid her hand as far as possible, even slipping partway under the bedframe. She placed the candle on the floor near her head to allow as much light as possible to shine, but the carving wasn’t there. She rose and looked around the floor nearby before moving to the table that held her comb, perfume, and hair pins. She looked in her jewelry box and tore through her chests. She looked in Kieran’s chest and along his side of the bed. She stirred up the rushes throughout the chamber, but to no avail. The carving her father made was gone.

  Maude hurried to dress and rushed belowstairs as people gathered for the evening meal. She looked about, but Adeline was nowhere to be seen; however, Abigail glared at her. Maude searched for Kieran and breathed a sigh when he approached with Kyle. They were in the midst of a heated conversation, and Kieran barely spared her a glance until he stood before her, then his gaze softened before nodding to Kyle. His second-in-command continued on to the dais while Kieran laced his fingers with Maude’s.

  “How’re you fairing, buttercup?” He kept his tone soothing while attempting not to sound patronizing. “Did you rest?” He didn’t dare mention she looked as haggard as she had when she escaped his solar.

  “I slept, but Kieran, when I woke, I noticed my carving is missing. I searched everywhere, but it’s not in our chamber.”

  Kieran heard the concern in her voice, but Kyle’s gestures for him to join his second at the table distracted him. A rider had arrived to inform him that the Morrisons had been riding their border, and rather than be on patrol, they looked to be scouting a few of the neighboring villages. It concerned Kieran that a raid was imminent, and he’d been making plans to ride out when the bell for the evening meal sounded. He needed to continue his conversation with Kyle, but he noted Maude was upset. His gaze shifted back to her as he kissed her forehead.

  “I’m sure it’ll turn up. I’ll help you look when we retire.”

  “Nay, Kieran. I’m telling you, I looked. I looked beneath the bed, around the bedside table, in my chests, your chests, my jewelry box. I pushed the rushes around, but it wasn’t there.”

  “Perhaps it fell from your pocket,” Kieran led them toward the table as he nodded to Kyle. He seated Maude and turned to his chief warrior. Maude opened her mouth to argue that she never took it out of the chamber that day and had seen it when they woke that morning, but Kieran had dismissed her. She blinked several times as the servants moved about, bringing heaping dishes of food to the tables filled with clan members. A serving woman leaned between Kieran and Kyle, flashing Kieran a view of her cleavage, but he leaned away to continue speaking to Kyle. Despite Kieran’s clear lack of attention, many of the serving women and maids persisted in flirting with him in Maude’s presence. She gritted her teeth to keep from upbraiding the woman for flaunting herself. Kieran sensed Maude’s restlessness and looked over at her before following her stare to the woman who continued to linger as she offered him anything he might want. He hadn’t dallied with a servant since he was a young man discovering how women fawned over him. His father warned him of the dangers of playing favorites with servants, and it had convinced him to look elsewhere. The young woman annoyed him, so he waved her away in time to see another batting her eyelashes at him as she approached the dais with a platter of blood sausage just beneath her loosely tied blouse. A crack underfoot made the woman pause, and he saw Maude lean forward. Just as it had earlier that afternoon, the color leached from Maude’s face as the serving woman put down the platter and reached for what she’d stepped upon. Maude’s hands gripped the sides of the table as the woman lifted two small pieces of wood that had once been the family figurine Maude cherished. Kieran feared she might collapse as she swayed beside him. He reached to ease her into her chair, but she pushed his hands away. She reached across the table for the woman to put the remnants of her most prized possession into her hand. She turned the two pieces over; the wood splintered.

  “Ma lady, I am vera sorry. I didna ken it was there,” the young woman croaked.

  “I’m certain you didn’t, but someone did.” Maude’s eyes hardened as she looked at the others at the dais before casting her stare at the diners. She’d reached her limit for patience and forgiveness. If they cared so little for her that no one but the servant before her looked shocked or even dismayed, then she was finished trying to win them over. Her hand curled around the wood as she pushed back her chair and left the dais without a word. Kieran watched her in stunned silence. Her eyes were dry and her back ramrod straight as she walked with dignity
to the stairs. He watched her climb them and then disappear on the landing. Once she was out of sight, rage consumed him to a degree that paralleled his emotions on the battlefield.

  “Who?” he bellowed. “Who did this? Who stole from my wife and purposely hurt her?” No one moved. He didn’t expect anyone to admit to their guilt, but he hoped someone had seen something. “I will punish the culprit. I dinna care if it be a mon or a woman. I will take the lash to them. My wife has done naught to any of you since she arrived but be kind and generous. She has worked as hard as any other member of this clan, hoping to earn your respect, but naught she does is good enough for you. You’ve judged her based on the opinions of a bitter and spoiled woman and a temperamental and equally spoiled chit.”

  Kieran suspected his mother or sister, perhaps both of them, were behind this, but he also was certain they found someone to do their dirty work. Someone they would lay the blame on when he confronted them. He turned toward Abigail and leaned over the table as far as his tall body could reach.

  “You had something to do with this,” he hissed. “You and mother are behind this. You have crossed a line from which there is no return. Leave this table before I beat you.”

  Kieran had never in his life threatened a woman and been so close to following through. Red dots danced before his eyes as he drew a deep breath through his nostrils. He was grateful for the several chairs and people between him and Abigail. She dashed from the dais, not needing a second warning. He once again looked out at the crowd who watched him with guarded expressions, but he saw the fear on more than one person’s face. In the past, he would have regretted causing alarm among his people. He had never wanted them to cower before him, but the lack of healthy fear for his authority led to the conspiracy and actions that wounded Maude. His lip curled in disgust as he looked from person to person.