The Only Way

by Magan Vernon

  Once we got in the elevator and as soon as the doors shut, I let go of her hand and pressed her against the back wall. Her breathing came in short, shallow breaths against me and I wanted to hear her moan. To scream my name.

  My lips trailed up her jawline until I nipped her ear lobe. “It is taking everything in my power not to fuck you right here.” She craned her neck to the side to give my wandering lips better access. She sighed, her chest pushing against mine. “I don’t think an elevator that probably has cameras is this best place to do this.”

  I leaned back and stared into her hooded eyes. “Then let’s go home.”

  She took my hand, as the elevator doors dinged and opened behind us. “Yes. Let’s go.” Sam took my hand and pulled me down the hallway toward the apartment. It was one of the many times I’d wished I was wearing my suit so she could pull me by my tie. There was something extremely hot about a girl being dominant.

  She stopped at the front door and I pressed against her, breathing onto her lips. I leaned in to kiss her but she nipped at my bottom lip before swirling her tongue around mine and sucking it softly. I moaned into her mouth and put one arm on her hip and the other hand on the door knob.

  Surprisingly, it was unlocked and I hoped it wasn’t because Trigg was home. If he was, hopefully he’d get the hint and leave. The door opened and I fell forward into Sam.

  “Hey Tripp, Hey, whoa, must be the new girlfriend,” a voice said. But it wasn’t Trigg. It was female.

  Sam broke our kiss and stepped to my side. Monica stood in the kitchen, staring at us wide eyed. Trigg and Trey were sitting on the couch with a carton of Chinese food in each of their hands.

  Trey stood up, setting his carton down. He wiped his hands on his jeans and walked the few steps to the front door, holding out his hand. Instead of his genuine smile, he had on the fake one that was the same one Dad reserved for political functions. I didn’t want that. If he was going to meet Sam, no matter how awkward the moment was, I wanted it to be real. “Hi, I’m Trey, Tripp’s younger brother.”

  Monica still stood there, wide-eyed as Trey shook Sam’s hand. It was the quietest Sam had ever been and the stiffest. She just kept looking from the floor to me and to Trey and Monica then biting her lip.

  Trey raised an eyebrow. “This may be rude, but you look really familiar. Sam is it?”

  Sam nodded. “Yeah. I think we went to school together.”

  Trey cocked his head and stared at Sam. “Sam as in Samantha? My old neighbor from sophomore year and Monica’s roommate?”

  I looked from Trey to Sam. She just kept her head down and then laughed nervously. “Yeah. The one.”

  Shit. She’d never told me that one.

  “Wow,” Monica said. “It’s been a long time. I haven’t seen you in forever. You look good. A lot different without the bright red dreadlocks and dark make-up.”

  Sam ran her hand through her short dark red hair. “Yeah. Heh. You look good too. You know with the whole pregnancy thing. You’re a glowing pregnant woman.” Sam laughed again nervously.

  There wasn’t any of her usual snark. Nothing like the Sam I was falling for. All parties were putting on a front and I hated it. This wasn’t a fucking election or family function, everyone just needed to be real. Especially if these three had history. History that I wish Sam would have told me about instead of me walking in blind.

  Trigg stood up, his chopsticks in one hand and the carton in the other. He walked over to us with a big cheesy grin. “Wow, this is all like one big awkward family reunion. Too bad none of us really drink. I can change that if we need to. I’m sure the Seven-Eleven is open to get a bottle.”

  I shook my head. “Probably not the time.”

  “Yeah.” Trey said, putting his hand on Monica’s shoulder. “It’s getting late and you’ve been on your feet all day. We should head home.”

  Monica nodded. “Yeah. We should go.” She stared at Sam as if she’d seen a ghost and could barely look away, even when they said their goodbyes.

  It was one of the most awkward and confusing moments of my life and I’d done acid. My trips were far less confusing than that.

  Trigg leaned against the front door, smiling as he chewed the last of his food. “So, Sammy, it looks like you were hiding a little something from me and my brother dearest.”

  “Or did you know and that’s why you were trying to hide her from the family for so long?” Trigg asked, pointing a chopstick at me.

  “No. He didn’t know,” Sam whispered.

  I stared at her, waiting for her to say something. Anything. It seemed like forever before she finally turned her back to us. “I’m going to take a shower. I’ll see you guys when I get out.”

  Without looking back at us, she walked the few steps to the bathroom and closed the door behind us.

  I turned and punched Trigg in the shoulder. It wasn’t hard but he still flinched and grabbed his arm. “Ow! What was that for?”

  “Why the hell were you here with Monica and Trey anyway? Then asking her questions like that? Way to make it even more awkward.”

  “Hey!”He lifted his arms up. “Don’t hate me just because I was asking what you were wondering.”

  I glared, because I didn’t have a better response. I did want to know if there was something she was hiding by not telling me that she knew my brother. Hell, that she roomed with Monica. I knew that Monica had some stoner roommate her sophomore year that Trey called the cops on. I only knew this because Trey said he knew the smell, since it was the same one that always came from my bedroom when we were younger.

  Were Monica and Trey around when Sam’s mom died? Did they even know?

  There were so many questions I had, but I didn’t know if I’d ever get the answers.

  ***

  I stayed up another hour with Trigg and he told me about his debacle with Roni. She was staying in Chicago at her parents for the holiday, but unsure what would happen when they went back east. For Bella’s sake, they were going to see where Christmas took them.

  This meant that Trigg would also be staying with me until after Christmas.

  Awesome.

  Sam had come out of the shower in the middle of our conversation. She changed into a faded blue t-shirt and some shorts. I couldn’t help but stare. Sure it wasn’t the sexiest thing to wear to bed, but I liked it when she didn’t try. When she was just herself.

  When she slipped into bed and pulled out a book, I finally looked back at Trigg who smiled at me. “I think I’d better hit the hay as well. It’s been a long day.”

  I nodded. “Yeah. It has.”

  I got into my pajama pants and crawled next to Sam. She didn’t say a word. The only sounds in the apartment were of Trigg getting ready and Hashtag Cat snoring. By the time Trigg’s snores echoed the cat’s, Sam turned off the light on the bed side table and laid down.

  I glanced over to see that she was on her back, her eyes still open. She let out a deep sigh. “So I guess I have some explaining to do.”

  I turned on my side. “You don’t have to, but it’d be nice.”

  She didn’t move. “Monica was my roommate my sophomore year. We got along okay, but once she started dating Trey, we didn’t really talk much. It was fine with me because it’s not like we were best friends or anything. By the time everything happened with my mom, she was basically living at your brother’s, so I didn’t even bother to tell her. I finished out the semester and left.”

  “So...since you knew my brother does that mean you knew who I was as soon as I saw you?”

  She shook her head. “Not at first. Like I said, I stopped really following the news. But once you started talking and I saw the driver, I started putting things together. Then, you left me that note with your name on it and I knew exactly who you were.”

  “Is that why you pushed me away?”

  She shook her head. “No. That had more to do with getting screwed over by my ex and then trying to find my way back to a good place by screwing ev
eryone else. I knew that I probably could have just batted my eyelashes and you would have fucked me in the back alley.” She sighed. “But, like I said when we met, I saw something else behind those eyes of yours. Something tortured. I didn’t think a guy that was born into privilege would have so many demons, but the more I’ve gotten to know you, the more I’ve seen the real man. Not the one the news shows. The one who fights hard and loves harder.”

  I smiled. “In the past few weeks I’ve known you, you’ve verbally kicked my ass. But at the same time you’ve definitely picked me up. Where would I be without you?” I grabbed her outstretched hand then traced my fingers up her unfinished tattoo.

  She smiled, barely turning her head toward me. “Probably be high. Or drunk. Or maybe working at a job you hate and wishing you were eating pancakes with me.”

  “You’re probably right.” I brushed my finger tips on the black sparrows just above her elbow. “Since I’m not any of those things, and since it seems like you’re stuck with me, are you going to get this tattoo finished?”

  She nodded. “Yeah. That sounds like a good idea.”

  “Tomorrow?” I asked.

  She took her free hand and put it on mine, squeezing it gently. “Tomorrow.”

  With that last word, I kissed her knuckles and rolled over to succumb to sweet sleep. I got the answers I wanted, but still had so many more questions about this beautiful girl lying next to me. But just like my psychiatrist told me, I had to take things one day at a time and there was always tomorrow.

  Chapter 20

  Trigg was gone early the next morning, without leaving us breakfast. Sam was up before me, already dressed and pouring coffee.

  “That excited for the tattoo?” I asked, sitting up. I would have gotten up and walked over to her, but my morning wood was in prime form and I didn’t want to poke her eye out.

  She shook her head. “No. Fucking Hashtag Cat was a pain in the ass last night. I had trouble sleeping because she kept wanting to be as close as she could to me.”

  I knew that one. Every time I tried to put my arm around Sam or get closer, the cat swatted me. It was the biggest cock block I’d ever met. “Yeah. I guess he likes you.”

  She filled a second cup and walked over to the bed, handing me one of them. “Yeah. He’s getting used to you I think, too.”

  “Like you’ve gotten used to me?” I took a sip of my coffee.

  “I tolerate you.”

  “You know, you don’t need to share the bed with me if you don’t like me. It can just be me and Hashtag Cat. We’ll spread out. Have some bro time.” I nodded over at the cat that was curled up at the other side of the bed. “Ain't that right, bro?”

  Hashtag Cat barely looked up at me, then growled.

  Sam laughed. “Yeah, I think you’re stuck with me instead of having bro time with your new BFF.”

  I leaned in and ran a finger along the bare skin of her arms. “That’s a damn shame. I was starting to like the cat, too.”

  “Such a shame,” she whispered, before sealing her words with a kiss.

  ***

  For a Saturday, Belmont was pretty empty. Probably because it had snowed overnight and now everything was covered in white.

  Even though I wanted to stay in bed and see how much further I could take kissing Sam, she instantly broke it to get ready. I guess she was excited about getting her tattoo and we still had to get her car.

  After hailing a cab, we held hands down the street, watching the fluffy snowflakes blow past our faces. It felt good to walk with her like this. I didn’t know if this was considered dating or what was going on with us, but whatever it was I didn’t want to fuck it up.

  “This is my place,” I said, stopping in front of The Phoenix.

  “Yeah. I’ve been by here before, but never gone in. Most of mine are from college. It’s been awhile...”

  I nudged her arm. “Scared it’s going to hurt and I’m going to see you cry?”

  She smacked my shoulder with her free hand. “No, fucker.”

  “You have the sweetest nicknames for me.”

  She smirked. “Yeah, yeah. Let’s go inside and do this, so you’ll quit griping at me about it.”

  I opened the door to the shop. “After you.”

  I followed her in and shut the door behind me. Immediately, the smell of antiseptic and ink hit my nose, followed shortly by the buzzing of the needle and punk rock music that filled my ears. This used to feel like home. Where I belonged. But now, I had an entirely different view of home and she was standing next to me, staring at the artwork on the walls.

  “You ready for this?” I asked, nudging her.

  “Always,” she said.

  An older guy with a shaved head that was covered in tattoos sat behind the front counter. I’d seen him a few times before but didn’t know his name. I just usually called him Smokey because he sounded like that damn bear that used to do the forest fire prevention commercials.

  “Hey, Tripp, you here to see Frankie?” He asked.

  I shook my head. “Naw, no ink for me for awhile, but my girl here is looking to finish up a piece.”

  He nodded. “All right. Frankie’s schedule is free. He’s just out back having a smoke but should be in soon.”

  “Sounds good. We’ll wait.”

  Sam turned toward me, a devious smile on her face. “So that’s all I am now? I’m your girl?”

  I raised an eyebrow. “What would you rather I call you?”

  She shrugged. “I guess you don’t have anything else creative.”

  “Would you rather I say ‘my sugar dumpling’? Maybe my old lady?”

  She grimaced. “Okay. Girl is fine.”

  I laughed. “Naw. I think I like sugar dumpling.”

  “Call me that again and I’ll feed your balls to Hashtag Cat.”

  “Whoa, am I interrupting a lover’s quarrel?” Frankie’s accented voice bellowed from behind us.

  “Frankie!” I let go of Sam’s hand and put my arms out, embracing him in a big hug. When I let him go I kept an arm around him and pointed to Sam. “This is my old lady, Sam. She’s looking to finish some work on her arm.”

  “An old lady, ey?” Frankie asked, looking between me and Sam. Even in the middle of winter the guy was in a button down Hawaiian shirt and a fedora. Frankie was definitely unique and I liked that.

  Sam put her hand out and shook his. “Yes. I’m his better half.”

  I couldn’t help the grin that spread across my face. We’d never voiced anything official but the fact that she could admit she was with me, definitely had me feeling pretty good.

  Frankie let go of her hand and nodded. “Let’s head over and you can show me what we’re going to work on today.”

  We followed Frankie to his station. Sam took off her coat and I hung it up on the rack with mine before she sat down on the chair. She rolled up her sleeve and set her arm down on the armrest. “I started this for my mom. It’s just a shitty outline right now, but I think you get the point of the feather with the two birds flying from it.”

  Frankie sat down on his stool, putting on a pair of wire-rimmed glasses. “Oh yeah. I can see where some shitty artist tried to work this.” He looked up at Sam and smiled. “I can fix it for you. No problem.”

  “Hey. What if I did this tattoo myself? Or a family member?”

  Frankie grabbed the antiseptic bottle and sprayed her arm. “Then you’d be a pretty shitty artist and I’d tell you the same thing.” He turned on his gun and went to work.

  I hadn’t actually watched someone else get a tattoo. It was like watching a surgeon and his patient. It wasn’t intimate, but by the way Frankie concentrated and meticulously crafted each piece, it was easy to see that this was an art to him. Something he was proud of. Something he wanted as much for the person in the chair as he did for himself.

  Sam’s eyes stayed closed and she looked peaceful. The few times she bit down on her bottom lip, my hand was on hers in an instant, squeezing it to let
her know I was there. By all the ink she had, I knew she was used to the pain of it, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t make it better.

  Time seemed to move in slow motion. We could have been sitting there for hours and I wouldn’t have noticed. I was too busy watching her.

  “Okay, Sam, you ready to see the final product?” Frankie asked.

  Sam nodded and opened her eyes. She lifted her arm up and gasped. My eyes widened. The piece was even more beautiful than I thought it would be. He had used the same brown and white outline that he had on my latest tattoo and it made the feather and birds look like they were coming to life and going to fly away. To be set free. The guy was fucking good.

  “What if I said I don’t like it?” Sam asked.

  Frankie smiled. “By that tear falling down your cheek, I’d say that’s not the case.”

  She swiped her cheek. “It’s beautiful. It’s perfect.”

  Frankie put his hand on hers. “Your mom would have loved it too.”

  “Thank you,” Sam whispered.

  He patted her hand. “Thank you for letting me work on it.” He looked up at me. “Now you take care of my boy. He’s a bit of a pain in the ass, you know?”

  Sam smiled and looked back at me. “Yeah. I know.”

  I grabbed her coat and we walked to the front counter to pay. The bell rang overhead and a gust of wind blew in, the icy chill sending prickles up my spike and neck. That should have been a clue that something was about to go down.

  “I’d recognize that ass anywhere, especially when I’ve been stood up!”

  I cringed, hearing the shrill of Tawny’s voice.

  I turned to see the little blonde pixie standing in the doorway. She pulled off her beanie and shook the snow out of her hair. “I was waiting for you in the car and you never showed.” Her eyes trailed over to Sam. “Guess you’re getting your pussy and weed somewhere else now.”

  The guy behind the counter stood up. “Hey, Tawny, cool it, okay? They’re customers.”

  Tawny curled her upper lip and stomped closer to us. “Customers my ass. How long has Tripp been coming in here, fucked up beyond all reason? Now we’re supposed to believe he’s a saint because he’s out of rehab? The fucker was just in here the other day asking me to get high then left me out in the cold. Fucking prick.”