WindSwept Narrows: #13 Charity, Faith & Hope
Page 18
“Hope!” He burst out laughing, spinning her around and willing the male in him to ignore the straining white lace bra and hip hugging lace edged panties. “It’s okay…there aren’t any more.”
“You’re sure?”
“I’m positive,” he said gruffly, gazing down into the wide, luminous eyes. “You are enough to make an intelligent man forget his name,” he murmured, his words only for her.
He knew he was undone the instant those wide, dark eyes peered up at him filled with the essence of her name and trust in his answer. Warm, large palms framed her face seconds before he lowered his mouth to hers, sweeping in to nibble and taste hungrily. Devon felt her palms against his chest, vaguely aware of her head shaking slowly before she turned her head, inhaling raggedly.
“I…that’s not a good idea…not good at all,” she whispered, backing up and falling to the bed. Her feet were up on the edge, pushing so she could scoot to the other side, her head still shaking in denial. Hope kept her eyes on his, mesmerized by the amber gold sparkling there as he leaned over, his palms on the surface of the bed.
“Why not, Hope? You were kissing me back…” Devon moved slowly forward, trying to read the mass of emotions on her face. Confusion, denial and arousal all wanting top spot at once.
“No…alright…maybe…” she swallowed hard, grabbing a blanket and covering herself as she continued backing away until she felt the edge behind her. He was stalking her, she thought frantically, breathing rapidly and watching the lights play tricks with the sharp edges of his teeth.
“Then why, Hope?” He whispered.
Hope listened to the low, husky sound, shivering and holding her breath as he moved closer. Her eyes widened a little more when he nudged the blanket out of the way with his face, his lips touched her stomach just above her naval. She closed her eyes, the warm heat of his breath over her skin bringing another shiver.
“You smell so good…” He heard the little whimper, laughing softly when she snapped her knees close together. “Not even that smell, Hope…soaps and lotions,” he continued his move forward, dropping light kisses along the edge of her bra, chuckling when she stopped breathing and froze in place. He inhaled deeply when he made it to her throat, his tongue drawing a slow line to her ear. “And you taste sweet…good night, Hope,” he said softly, kissing her and staring into the dark eyes, her response whispered against his mouth.
She held her breath until he’d backed off the bed, the door closing behind him. She fell face down on the bed, pulling the blankets over her head and groaning into the pillow.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Devon was still lying in bed when the commotion began. He was up reluctantly, striding through the connecting door and staring at the two figures hopping up and down, squealing excitedly.
“Our first day!” They squealed together.
“Alright…you go get your clothes…” Hope ordered, ignoring the baffled sleep ridden male standing and watching them. He barely dodged the little figure shoving at him to get past and into her bedroom.
“What in the world are you two…”
“It’s our first day!” Mina yelled excitedly, streaking past him with an arm full of clothes she dumped onto the bed.
“Clothes off, bathroom and brush teeth,” Hope ordered, going into her closet and pulling her selection free, laying it reverently on the bed.
“Right!” Mina took off into the bathroom, clothing tossed behind her as she ran.
Devon wasn’t sure he totally understood what was happening, but the flurry of activity was a little much for the male in him. He left with Hope following Mina into the bathroom with a hair brush in her hands and girl chatter and squeals filling the rooms. He needed coffee, he decided before going to find his clothes.
He made it to the kitchen as Mina was finishing her cereal, Hope busy preparing little bags of food and putting them into a backpack he hadn’t seen before. It was bright pink and purple with flowers everywhere.
“Okay…we got snacks…apples, fish crackers, juice boxes and pretzels,” Hope called out, looking up to see Mina nod excitedly through another bite of cereal and milk. “Extra clothes…and required extra supplies. All set, missy.”
“Now?” Mina returned after draining the milk from the bowl, her arm grabbed before it was up to swipe over her mouth. Hope quickly cleaned her up, unaware of Jackie behind her making motions to Devon.
Matt just shook his head and studied his coffee as his friend tried figuring out the pantomime commands.
“You girls look really nice this morning,” Devon tried at first, instantly aware of the error when Jackie dropped her head and slapped her palm over her forehead. Both girls looked up at him from the counter.
“Nice?” Hope repeated slowly.
“Better than nice…really good,” he corrected, groaning inwardly when it was obvious that was still not quite the right answer. “Gorgeous…” He looked and received a half thumbs up from Jackie.
“I was hoping for professional,” Hope said with a sigh and shrugged with a glance at Mina. “But we’ll accept gorgeous. Let’s go, Mina. Can’t be late on our first day,” she lifted the little girl to the floor, handing her the backpack and lifting her own tote from the counter. “Bye! See you all later!”
“We gotta go!” Mina told her, grabbing her hand and pulling.
“Whoa, ladies…you’re forgetting something,” Devon’s voice was firm enough to bring them both to a stop, heads turning in his direction.
“What??” Hope’s brows arched and her voice hinged on panic. She watched him drop to his heels and look at Mina, tapping his cheek lightly.
“Oh, daddy,” Mina raced back kissing him loudly before offering a scolding glance. “You are gonna make us late!”
“Your turn,” Devon stood up, winking at the bewildered expression as he tapped his cheek.
“Oh, you are not…” Hope struggled against stomping her foot, stepping toward him and aiming a pair of tinted, full lips at his cheek only to have him realign them to accept her kiss. She moved away quickly, ignoring the gleam in his eyes, her hand out to take Mina’s and walk quickly through the house to the parked car.
“Boss…you are seriously in need of some training,” Jackie exhaled deeply, shaking her head. “Nice? She looks nice? Give me a break…” She looked at the two men in amazement.
“I appreciate the attempts,” Devon said with a laugh, his head shaking as he refilled his coffee. “We need another child seat for her car…if and when one of you are out. Thanks…I’ll be in my office if anything happens.”
Hope drove carefully through the quiet, early morning streets, grateful for thoughts of the new position. For some odd reason, her mind and other parts of her kept wandering to the man insinuating himself into her life.
She wasn’t sure where the day went. By four, she had over a dozen pages in her note book filled with instructions, a decent filing system started and the computers up and running. A very excited and laughing Mina ran into her arms when she appeared in the waiting area for parents to retrieve kids and it sent a special spark through her when the little arms hugged her tightly.
Hope set her free outside the house and watched her run into the foyer, jacket being shed as she moved. She barely caught it as Mina took off in search of daddy to tell him all about her first day and show him the masterpiece for his office. Hope left them alone, quietly climbing the stairs and falling face down on the bed with a groan.
Devon looked up from the chattering child perched on the edge of his desk. “Where’s Hope?”
“She has brain fry,” Mina answered solemnly, motioning to be put onto the floor, running lightly to her corner and setting her dolls and animals at the small tea table, all the while telling them about her new friends.
“Brain fry,” Devon repeated slowly. He took a guess that it was the pretty typical thing that happens when you begin a new position and went back to his computer, reading through proposals and making adjustments.
Tuesday morning was a repeat of Monday, the girls up and excited and racing about their rooms, at one point squealing for shoes before streaking to the kitchen for breakfast. Hope wasn’t sure when he’d managed to get her used to kissing him, but somehow it had begun to feel normal. He dangled the keys to her car out in front of her.
“Where’d you get those?” She demanded suspiciously.
“I got connections…and you got a kid seat. So either car is good now. Leave the keys on the board when you’re not using it, okay?” He told her, tipping her chin up and kissing her. “See you later,” he promised after accepting his farewell kiss from Mina.
Hope had Mina in the center and was headed back to her office when she felt an arm link with each of hers from behind, pulling and backing her against the wall. Two frowns glared at her, arms up and crossed.
“You got some talking to do, friend,” Charity announced firmly.
“I…okay…alright…but time…I gotta get to work,” Hope rattled, her mouth dropping open and both Faith and Charity turning to follow her gaze. “What’s he doing here?”
“He’s talking to Dominic,” Faith noted with a frown.
“You know him? He’s my boss!” Hope whispered frantically.
“He’s expanding the pack,” Faith whispered direly.
“Devon has these…I swear…amber gold eyes that glow in the dark…”
Charity rolled her eyes, watching as their eyes got bigger at the comment.
“Alright…you two need to really stay out of the para-normal section of the book store,” Charity took a walk to the side. “Seriously…lunch at noon, Hope. We want answers.”
“No, seriously…” Hope looked at Faith and then over at the men chatting. “Pack?” Came the weak, high pitched word.
“I’m telling you…serious wolf attributes,” Faith said with a sigh. “I gotta get to work. Noon…” She accepted the nod, watching her friend back up a step when the man approached. “See those teeth…”
Faith took off at a light run to the computer center, chuckling as she went.
“What are you doing here?” Hope hissed worriedly when he came up to her. “Are you trying to get me fired?”
“Dominic and I are old friends, Hope, relax. I told him we had papers to fill out at the child care center. You won’t be late,” he glanced at his watch and at the corridors. “They called about some information they were missing. So let’s go knock it out and you can get to your office.”
They finished the paperwork and she was walking him toward the entrance. “Doesn’t it bother you just a little that this is fraud? We’re lying to…to our friends and…and…people…”
“Nope. Not a bit. It’s no one’s business,” Devon told her, shrugging and kissing her before she could protest. “I’ve got an appointment. I’ll see you tonight at dinner. Be careful.”
Hope nodded and sighed. He was easy to kiss, she mused, wandering to the admin section and forcing her brain to the clients they already had wanting appointments. She worked to build more of the information packets they were giving people, absorbing the information as it was offered.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Devon couldn’t remember the last time he felt this uncomfortable, this nervous. He signed in and paced. Something he guessed the receptionist was accustomed to as she only offered a smile of reassurance.
“Mr. Alexander?” She looked up with another of those peaceful smiles. “Dr. Carrow is ready to see you now,” she pushed a button and released the lock on the door, admitting him to the back offices. “Straight back.”
Harriet Carrow met him at the door to her office. Tall with very silver, short cropped hair and gold rimmed glasses. She held her palm out to him.
“Devon…I’m Harriet…don’t look so stricken…I rarely bite and almost never yell at my clients,” she assured him, gesturing to the comfortable chair in front of her desk. She took a seat at the side and gestured to the recorder. “I don’t take notes…but I do record, is that alright with you?”
“I…yes, of course…can’t imagine anyone being that interested in anything I say here,” he said, opening his suit jacket and sitting back stiffly. “I’ve never…I don’t know what I’m supposed to do…”
“Well…we talk. I’ll make some guesses and you correct me if I’m wrong…and you answer and think,” she said easily. “It would put me out of business to admit, but most people have the answers inside themselves. But they need someone to ask the right questions for them to be realized. It’s also based on how honest you can be with yourself. You said in your paperwork that you’ve lost someone you cared about…” She saw the answer in his face. “How long ago?”
“Almost three years…my wife…”
“You’ve never seen a counselor before today?”
Devon exhaled deeply. “I didn’t know I needed one…not until recently…”
“Something’s changed in your life and this past is bothering you. Guys rarely discuss emotional things with their friends…I know a few who have that level of friendship, but very few. So this isn’t something you’ve discussed before?”
“No…not really…they know Maggie died, of course…people believed…I believed…” he ran one hand through his hair. “I wanted to believe…something entirely different than what it really was…”
“Were you happily married?”
“I…in the beginning…isn’t that always the way it is?”
“Did you tell her?”
“She knew…she is…was…an artist…I used to blame it on…on moods or temperamental fits,” he pushed out of the chair and paced to the window, hands sunk in his pockets. “It…I’m not sure it was a surprise when I finally accepted that we just didn’t fit together. I told her I was filing for divorce the same time she told me she was pregnant,” he blurted out.
“Did she become pregnant to keep you?” She asked softly.
“No…no, I don’t think so…Maggie was self-absorbed…she grew up spoiled and that didn’t change…. I think she might have kept the baby to keep me, though,” he said slowly. “Half way through the pregnancy, they found the cancer. There wasn’t anything they could do…it was aggressive and terminal. She blamed the baby, even though they told her…” he shook his head. “What I don’t get is how I…in my head…how you change history, what was real…into something totally different than what was there when you actually stop long enough to think clearly.”
“Because you don’t want to admit you did or said something stupid or wrong,” Harriet told him with a smile. “Humans adjust perception to help them accept things. Life and death. I always wonder how much is genuine truth when you listen to people talking at funerals. But it’s not socially acceptable to be honest, even in death.”
“So in my head, I convinced myself we had a good relationship because it was easier than admitting I’d made a mistake,” he said derisively. “I guess I would have expected I’d be honest at least with myself.”
“Isn’t that why you’re here? Honesty is like a lot of things, Devon, it takes time for the mind and emotions to process and accept.”
“Makes me look like a good, solid dad figure.”
“How old is the child?”
“Mina…she’s three and a month,” he said softly.
“Is she a happy child?”
Devon turned from the window and met her gaze. “Yes…yes, I think so.”
“Do you feel responsible for Maggie’s death?” She saw the answer on his face. “Did you ask her to remain pregnant?”
“I didn’t, no. She found out soon enough it could easily have been ended.” He ran his h
ands over his neck. “She kept making excuses…putting off talking to the doctor about aborting. I…I could have pushed harder, I suppose. She said she knew how much I always wanted a family,” he said softly, visions of their arguments going through his mind. “Rationally…I know it wasn’t my fault.”
“Our emotions rarely work on rational thoughts, Devon,” she said gently.
“She was almost five months when they found the cancer,” he said slowly, pacing in front of the window, thinking. “I was with her when the doctor told her it wouldn’t matter either way. She didn’t even cry. Later she blamed Mina…after she was born…a great deal of anger finally set in…”
“Did she leave anything for her daughter? A…journal or video?”
“She wouldn’t even hold her,” Devon shook his head and said the words aloud for the first time. “She wanted nothing to do with the baby. I kept photos…and some of her paintings for Mina. I don’t even know what to tell her about her mother if she asks….”
“You’ll create a nice mother who was sorry she had to leave her baby,” Harriet suggested warmly, watching him nod slowly. “What’s changed, Devon? That made you come to a counselor?”
“Hope,” he said simply.
“You’re looking for hope?” She asked with a small frown.
Devon shook his head, smiling for the first time since meeting her. “Hope Williams,” he clarified.
“Ahh…a woman…does she remind you of Maggie?”
“God, no…she’s…the total opposite of Maggie,” he admitted slowly. “Hope grew up in a large family, always in charge, always grown up. In Hope’s family, everyone was more important than her. She’s like a sixteen year old in a thirty something body. Maggie was an only child who was never taught there was anyone in the world but her.”
“Why does it bother you to remember Maggie as she was? Who is it being irreverent to? Her family? Yours?”
“I don’t know,” he answered honestly. “There is no one except Mina, my daughter. I guess…a memory doesn’t care…part of you wants to believe that maybe in some after life place she realizes how badly she treated others and…and wants to make amends…or at least be happy for the people left behind.”