I Hate Myself For Loving You (Scorned Lovers Book 2)

by Simone Harlow

  Pete leaned over in the chair next to him. “What do you think about when you think about her.”

  He wasn’t going to tell her father he always wanted to get her into bed. That would just be wrong. “She’s the first thing I think about when I get up and the last thing I think about when I go to bed. We don’t have to talk I just like being in the same room with her. She pisses me off, she makes me laugh. I’m not interested in other women.” Pete studied him. “What do you think you have?”

  “Until the baby I thought we were just getting our wiggles out.”

  “Wiggles?” Fox asked.

  Wrong answer. “I probably shouldn’t have said that in front of her brother and her dads.”

  “Did you quote ‘Nacho Libre’?” Malcolm asked.

  Declan shrugged. “I say stupid stuff.”

  “But do you do stupid stuff?”

  “I don’t know how to be in a relationship. I’ve never had to be to get what I want. I’m Declan Shaw.”

  “You never dated a woman?” Pete asked.

  Declan shook his head. “Never had to.”

  “Me either.” Fox said.

  Pete turned to Malcolm “Sid?”

  “Nope.”

  “You got no game?”

  “How did you get Addy?”

  “It took me a year to get her to go out with me.”

  Declan asked. “What did you do?”

  “I dressed up as a clown and went to her office.”

  What the fuck that was stupid. “That worked?”

  Pete shook his head. “No, she’s terrified of clowns.”

  Fox snickered. “So is Malcolm.”

  “Thanks for sharing,” Malcolm muttered.

  Declan was even more confused. “Why are you telling that story.”

  “Because the clown worked for a scared kid at her office. She was a social worker. That worked for her.”

  “Should I dress like a clown?” Because he do it.

  Pete stuffed out his cigar. “Oh hell no Jane will shoot you. Work with what you got.”

  He thought for a minute then stood. “I got this.”

  “What are you going to do?” Malcolm asked.

  “Turn in my man card.”

  “You’re my best friend I have your back.”

  “You might not want to know me after this.”

  “You going to share?”

  He shook his head. Nope because he might chicken out. Then again, this was Jane he was talking about. He was going to get her. “In about five minutes.”

  Chapter Thirty

  WHO KNEW GAVIN COULD TWERK. Well sort of. Jane tried not to giggle as Gavin humped her leg. He was so much fun. He had no shame.

  She swung her hips and Gavin pretend slapped her on the ass. This man could give a silly show and not even be concerned with how it looked. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Declan, Fox, Malcolm and her dad come into the backyard. They must have settled on what they thought her future was going to be. Ha she thought. She was in control of her life, she made the decisions for herself and her baby. She watched Declan walk over to one of the guys in the band her mother hired. What the hell was that about? The song ended and the man who Declan talked to took center stage. He smiled at the crowd. “Ladies and gentleman we have a very special guest performing with us tonight. A man who needs no introduction, he is a legend--”

  “In his own mind.”

  “Thank you Malcolm.” Declan yelled.

  What the hell were they up to, Jane thought.

  “Before I was rudely interrupted. Ladies and gentleman the incomparable Declan Shaw.”

  The crowd went wild. Declan walked to center stage and took the mike off the stand. He smiled that golden god smile and Jane’s knees nearly buckled. “This is for you Jane.”

  A familiar guitar riff started. Oh My God. Was that ‘Like a Prayer’? Declan winked at her and then started singing. And dancing. He was belting out that song like he meant it. He moon walked across the stage. Jane stood there staring at him trying to close her mouth. Hell the man even threw in a James Brown split. Then he jumped off the stage and grabbed her around the waist and sang to her. He had no shame. She loved it. Her rock god could be silly in front of her and strangers. She didn’t think she could love him anymore than in this moment.

  Jane knew what this meant. He was staking his claim. Her heart raced. She had no idea how much she wanted this until this moment. He loved her. She wasn’t sure where this was going, but she at least now knew that she wasn’t alone in this. She would figure out the future later.

  His mouth descended on hers in a searing kiss. Everything around her stopped. All she could feel was him. His arms around her. His lips on hers. His tongue in her mouth. His heat scorching her. This had to be some pregnancy induced fantasy, but she didn’t care. Jane wasn’t sure how they made it back to the band house until Declan was leading her up the sidewalk. Until she nearly tripped over Shannon, Gavin’s little school friend.

  “Hi Shannon.”

  “Hi, you changed your hair.” She grabbed her blonde strands. “I thought Declan liked blondes.”

  Declan nuzzled Jane’s neck. “I needed a change.”

  “Gavin will be here in a few minutes.”

  Shannon gave them a smile. “I’ll wait in his room.”

  “Good night.” Jane waved.

  He slapped her on her ass. “Woman stop yapping.”

  “I’ll get there.”

  “Hurry.” He grabbed her hand and dragged her through the door.

  Twist was sitting on the steps. “Good party?”

  Jane smiled. “Yeah. Everything quiet?”

  “Boring.”

  Perfect she thought. “The way I like it.”

  “We gotta go.” Declan pulled on her again.

  “Have a good night.”

  Twist winked. “I’m sure it will be.”

  “Come on Jane.” He pulled on her arm. “We don’t have all night.”

  “Declan--”

  He picked her up and put her over his shoulder and carried her up the stairs.

  Who knew the caveman thing turned her on. Well it didn’t, but it was Declan and it was totally sexy. She could go with it.

  He got her into the bedroom and pushed her on the bed. He loomed above her and started to unbutton his shirt. He couldn’t seem to stop grinning at her. She propped herself up on her elbows and enjoyed the show. She loved that he knew exactly how hot he was and how to use his body as a tool of seduction. And as great as it was, she loved that he sang to her, in front of his friends and her family. Yeah it was a silly song, but the fact that he could publicly show that side to her meant the world to her. “Hurry up.”

  He shook his head. “Lay back and enjoy the show.”

  “I already enjoyed the show.”

  “I’m glad you liked it.”

  Before she could answer his phone rang.

  “Shit. That’s my brother.”

  “Answer the phone, I’m going to shower. You have five minutes.”

  “I’ll join you. Hey Brody, where the hell you been?”

  Jane’s shower lasted about three minutes, but when she got out she heard Declan almost yelling at his brother on the phone. Shit this didn’t sound good. Maybe that’s why she felt a little tense. Something didn’t feel right. She dried off and slipped into Declan’s shirt hanging off the door knob and put on her underwear. Shit before they got to any serious nookie she was going to raid the fridge. She needed ice cream. She glanced at Declan sitting on the bed. He rolled his eyes and fell back on the bed. Jane grabbed the door handle and opened the door. Gavin fell back and she bent quickly and caught him before his body hit the floor. The scent of blood hit her and wave of nausea overcame her. She looked up in time to see Shannon stand and grab a knife from the floor and head toward her, a look of crazy hate on her face.

  Jane grabbed Gavin and dragged him out of her way.

  “Declan, help.”

  “What the fuck?�
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  “Take care of him.” She stepped over him and headed for Shannon.

  “No one hurts my Declan.” Shannon yelled.

  How did she get passed them? “Bring it here bitch.”

  “Good.” Shannon started running toward her knife raised.

  “Jane no!”

  Shannon reached her and swiped the knife at her. Jane grabbed her wrist and used her momentum to turn her body, then got a handful of the woman’s hair and propelled her head into the wall.

  “Fucking bitch.”

  Jane pulled back and pushed her head into the wall again. This time she heard a crack and released her. Shannon’s body slid down the wall and the knife dropped from her hand. Jane kicked it down the hall. “Medic! Hoss! G-Baby down!”

  She turned to see Declan staring at her holding a towel to Gavin’s stomach. “Hoss!”

  Everything moved in slow motion, she progressed toward Gavin and saw he was still alive. She grabbed his hand. “Stay with me G-Baby. Okay?”

  “She stabbed--” he coughed. “Had to stop her.”

  “You did, G--”

  Gavin grabbed her hand. “Don’t tell mom I punched a girl.”

  “You saved Declan it’s alright this time.”

  “Gavin?”

  Jane looked up to see Malcolm standing in the doorway.

  Hoss pushed him aside. He knelt down. “Let me see.”

  She stood and stepped back.

  “Declan move the towel.”

  Declan shook his head. “He’s bleeding.”

  “I won’t know how bad until I see.”

  Jane moved to Malcolm.

  “What happened?”

  She didn’t have time to explain. “Everyone needs to back up. Has anyone called the paramedics?”

  “ETA fifteen minutes.” Twist said as he was securing Shannon with zip ties.

  Jane didn’t think Gavin had fifteen minutes.

  “Bodi grab my green bag. Malcolm what’s Gavin’s blood type?” Hoss said.

  “I think B.”

  Shit he was going to do a field transfusion.

  “Positive or negative?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “Twist get the bag.” Jane started rolling up her sleeve. She was O positive a universal donor.

  Hoss glared at her. “Hell no Jane, you’re pregnant.”

  “He is not dying on my watch. He doesn’t have fifteen minutes. Now Twist.”

  Malcolm grabbed her arm. “What are you doing?”

  “Hoss is going to give him a transfusion. Since you’re not sure I can give anyone blood.”

  “But-”

  “Hoss has put people back together who are worse than this.”

  Malcolm touched her arm. “Can you do it?”

  She nodded. “We don’t have time. Hoss is going to stabilize him until the ambulance gets here.”

  Declan grabbed her arm. “No.”

  “I can spare a pint. We just have to get him over the hump.”

  “I said no.”

  “I let this happen I have to fix it. I’ll be fine.”

  “Promise?” Declan took her face in both of his hands.

  She smiled. “I promise.”

  “Okay.”

  “Take care of Malcolm.” Jane pulled away from him but not until she touched his cheek.

  Twist came running back into the room and Hoss got her prepped. She closed her eyes and lay down and felt the cool sensation of the alcohol swab, then the needle slipping into her skin. She felt Declan take her hand. It was going to be alright. It had to be.

  * * *

  DECLAN CHECKED HIS WATCH. Ten minutes had passed. Five hours. Gavin had been in recovery for about an hour. He lost his spleen and a lot of blood. Jane’s blood had saved him. It took the ambulance almost a half an hour to get to them. She’d given him a pint. After a call to Cherry she confirmed Gavin’s blood type and Malcolm was able to donate, but Jane’s blood saved him. Why was she still at the police station? She should have been given a pass. It’s not like she killed that crazy bitch. According to Mick’s boyfriend who was the ER doctor on duty, she was down in the prison ward still out of it.

  The most important thing was that Gavin was going to be okay.

  “I brought you some coffee.” Shane thrust a paper cup in his face.

  Declan took the cup. He noticed Shane had a cotton ball tapped to his arm. Charlotte and Travis were giving blood at the moment. Declan was going when they got back. “You gave blood?”

  “It’s for Gavin. There are a couple hundred Scorned fans doing the same.”

  This had hit the news pretty fast. “That’s cool.”

  Shane sat next to him. “Between them and the paps, the hospital had to call in extra security.

  “We’ll pay for that.”

  “Jocelyn is handling that as we speak. There are cops out there in riot gear. Have you heard from Jane?”

  “Nothing. I left my phone at the house.”

  “You okay?”

  His gut clinched. “We almost lost Gavin, I don’t how Jane is. I’m trying to wrap my head around all this.”

  “Gavin wanted to stay awake for the surgery and asked if he could keep his spleen.” Shane laughed.

  Declan shook his head. “He’s so bizarre.”

  “And he’s all ours.”

  Declan laughed. It felt good to hear something like that.

  “Jane’s fine.”

  “How do you know?”

  He pointed down the hall. “She’s not wearing state issue jewelry.” Shane stood. “I’ll let you have a moment.”

  Declan couldn’t breathe as she walked down the hallway toward him wearing an NOPD sweat shirt and pants. She looked pale and tired. She had blood on her face. She was his warrior queen.

  “Hey.”

  “I thought they arrested you.”

  “They came at me hard, but I know all the tricks.”

  There shouldn’t have been any problem. “Why? You were doing your job.”

  “I’m the daughter of NOPD’s chief of detectives. They had to make sure everything was above board. If they wanted to screw me my dad would have done the interview.”

  That amazed him. “He would have arrested you?”

  “If it warranted it, but it didn’t. She had a knife and Gavin was hurt. I didn’t kill her and they found a shit load of evidence against her.”

  He took her over to the bench and they sat down. “How did this happen?”

  “That’s a story. I hung around to get the details.”

  He slipped his hand in hers. “We have time.”

  “First how is Gavin?”

  “He lost his spleen.” His voice trembled.

  Her eyes widened and he saw relief in her gaze. “That’s it?”

  “That’s not enough?” Sometimes he forgot how hardcore Jane was. “Tell me about this girl.”

  “Her name is Priscilla Brewster, she’s a makeup artist from L.A. Which is one of the reasons we didn’t recognize her from the club. She had a stockpile of wigs, contacts and make up in her hotel room. Her hotel room is covered in Declan Shaw everything. Once Paige got her real name, she was able to find out a lot about her. She’s been in and out of mental hospitals for the last five years.”

  “Why haven’t I heard of her before?”

  “Up until a few months ago she was making real progress.” Jane leaned back until her head rested on the wall.

  “What happened to make her follow me to New Orleans?”

  “They’re still trying to figure it out, but she has a lot cash, some good fake ids.”

  “How did she get passed your guys, she was in Gavin’s study group.”

  Jane ran both her hands through her hair. “She took the identity of one of Gavin’s classmates so she passed the background check. She has a Tulane student ID under the name Shannon Keller. There is a Shannon Keller registered in Gavin’s Anthro class. The real Shannon Keller was found in the dorms, she never cancelled the class and she
doesn’t even know who Gavin Nash is. No one is certain how she got this woman’s info yet.”

  “She latched on to Gavin to get to me?” How was he going to live with that?

  “Yeah, but that’s not the most interesting part.”

  “Shit, there’s more.” The hits just keep on coming.

  “She has a partner.”

  “Is that common?”

  Jane shook her head. “Usually stalking is a solo sport.”

  “It’s not over.” His chest tightened. No one was safe.

  “We won’t know until we find the guy she was with.”

  “It’s a man?”

  “Which is strange, men don’t tolerate women’s obsession.”

  “What do we do next?”

  She laced her fingers through his. “Keep you from being dead and try to figure out who this guy is.”

  Her touch comforted him. “How are you?”

  “I’m okay. Detective Swan kept pouring coconut water down me to get my platelets up.”

  “That works?”

  She poked him in the arm. “Yeah, if someone wouldn’t have drank all of it we could have used it to transfuse Gavin.”

  “I’ll never drink it again.” Declan looked up and he saw Jay coming down the hall toward them. He stood. “How’s he doing?”

  Jay gave him a shaky smile. “Good. He wants to talk to the two of you.”

  Jane took Jay’s hand. “Have you been debriefed by the police?”

  Jay nodded. “Mick told us everything. They are going to keep Gavin under guard until they can move him to a more secure location.”

  Jane bit her bottom lip. “Jay I’m sorry this is all my fault.”

  Jay put his hand on her arm. “It was that crazy bitch’s fault. And maybe Gavin’s because he thinks with his …” Jay stopped himself.

  “Dick? Don’t hold back I spent a lot of time around cops and soldiers. I stopped being shocked by the time I hit middle school.”

  Declan didn’t let himself laugh. She had more balls than any on them. “Is that woman awake.”

  Jane scowled. I thought she hurt her worse.

  Declan eyed her. Jane fucked her up pretty good. Did she want to do worse? What the hell was he thinking, of course she did. “Is she talking?”

  Jay nodded. “They gave her meds hoping they can level her out before she talks, but she has a lawyer who is talking about suing you.”