Too Hard to Break

by Missy Jane

  Ben laughed and Megan rolled her eyes.

  “So after one of the classes Sean finally showed up and went right up to her,” Ben said with a gleam in his eye. “Kissed her right there in front of everyone and glared at the guy until he left. Then I heard he caught up with him in the locker room and told him to back off.”

  “Oh my god! And Craig didn’t freak?” I asked.

  They both laughed and Megan shook her head. “Nope. He was clapping Sean on the back like they were best friends. Seems he hates that member, but of course he couldn’t ever tell him anything.”

  I laughed and shook my head, just imagining that scene. Craig was the manager of the gym and our boss. He usually ran a tight ship but could be counted on at the oddest times. He’d been really good to me every time I had trouble with Declan.

  “Hey that reminds me, though I’m not sure why, when does vacation time roll over?”

  Ben frowned and Megan shrugged.

  “I think next month but I can check,” she said.

  “Why? You going somewhere?” Ben asked.

  I scowled at him since it really wasn’t any of his damn business, but he held my gaze. “I don’t know,” I finally said. “Hank asked and I didn’t have the answer. I just figured it wouldn’t hurt to know.”

  “Ooh, is he taking you on vacation?” Megan asked.

  Ben frowned at her before walking away from the counter without a word. I watched his back and wondered if I should have a heart-to-heart talk with him.

  “What’s his problem?” Megan asked.

  “I dunno. He’s been acting funny but I think he wants to take me out.”

  She laughed and dropped her towel in the hamper.

  “Are you kidding? He knows you live with Hank.”

  “He does?”

  “Hell yeah. Everyone does. It’s not like we could miss his weekly visits.”

  I snorted out a laugh and relaxed. Hank did have a tendency to drop in at least once a week and glare at every man in the place. Poor Ben usually disappeared when that happened.

  “Yeah, I guess you’re right. I don’t know what he’s thinking.”

  “You told him no, right?”

  I stopped straightening out new member folders to look at her. “Huh?”

  “You told Ben to stop asking you out? You told him you’re serious about Hank?”

  I opened my mouth to answer then had to shut it again. Had I? I honestly couldn’t remember if I’d actually said those words. “Um…I think so.”

  She rolled her eyes. “Elle, you can’t leave the poor guy hanging. He’ll be okay. He stopped asking me out immediately after I told him it wouldn’t work between us last year. He’s really a good guy, you know?”

  I nodded even though I’d had my doubts. Of course, I had my doubts about every male in existence after Declan’s abuse. I knew better than to think they were all like that, but how would I know the difference?

  “I know. I didn’t mean to. I just…I don’t know. The first time he asked me out I just said it wasn’t a good time for me to be dating. He must have taken that as a maybe.”

  “Yeah, well you really need to get things straightened out with him and Hank one way or the other. You can’t keep second-guessing yourself.”

  “I know. You’re right.”

  She smiled and closed the distance to put her arm around me. We were close as sisters. Closer than really, since I tried not to talk to my sister too often.

  “Of course I’m right. Just like you were right back when you helped me out with Sean.”

  “That’s different.”

  “How?”

  I sighed and stepped out from beneath her arm. She let me go but disapproval was clear on her face. “You were just fighting his personal demons. For me there might be another woman involved.”

  She rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. “I think we might be wrong about that. I’m really sorry I even told you about the restaurant.”

  “Oh no, don’t be. I want you to swear you’ll always be honest with me when it comes to this kind of stuff.”

  “Well, of course I will. Just like you better be with me. All I mean is, I didn’t really see much and maybe I misunderstood what I saw. I mean, I can’t imagine Hank kissing you one day and then going out with someone else.”

  I shook my head and plopped down in my chair. “No. I can’t either.”

  “So…what are you going to do?”

  I shrugged and played with the pencil holder. “Hell if I know. Just coast for now I guess.”

  “And tell Ben to back off?”

  “Yes. I’m definitely going to do that.”

  “Good,” she said, straightening from where she’d been leaning on the counter. “Here he comes. Good luck.”

  I growled in aggravation as she sauntered away and Ben arrived.

  “What’s up?” he asked.

  With a sigh I rolled my eyes heavenward and prayed for strength and patience.

  The conversation was brief and he took it well. We joked around a few more minutes before his shift ended and it all seemed good between us. I just hoped I was right about that. Confusion over one man in my life was more than enough for me.

  I had about an hour left on my shift when Hank walked in and brought a smile to my face. He was carrying a bouquet of yellow roses.

  “Hey, beautiful, how’s your day been?” he asked.

  He handed me the flowers and I gushed over them a moment before remembering to answer him. “Better now, handsome. How’s yours?”

  He chuckled and shook his head. “It’s hot as hell outside but I think it’s even hotter in here.”

  He made a show of ogling me up and down and I snorted out a laugh.

  “Please tell me that line doesn’t actually work for you.”

  He laughed harder and shrugged. “Only if I find a really drunk lady to try it on. So, you get off soon?”

  “Yeah, in just under an hour.”

  “Perfect. I have something to show you and then we can go to dinner.”

  I looked down at myself and smirked. “All right, but no place fancy. I look a mess.”

  “You’re perfect.”

  Megan walked up before I could protest and gushed over the roses too. Hank reached across the counter and plucked one out of the bouquet, flashing me a wink as he handed it to Megan.

  “I would have brought you your own but Sean kinda scares me.”

  We all laughed at that but I had to wonder if it were true.

  “What are y’all doing for dinner tonight?” Hank asked.

  Megan shrugged and snapped off the stem of her rose so she could tuck it behind one ear. “Don’t know. He’s getting off work the same time as I am so one of us will probably just pick up some takeout on the way home. Wanna join us?”

  “Nah, I was actually going to ask if you two would join us. There’s something I need to show Elle first, but I’d kinda like you to see it too.”

  Her eyebrows shot up as she looked at me with a question in her gaze. I just shrugged and sniffed my roses.

  “Uh, sure. I’ll just call Sean and tell him to meet us here.”

  “Sounds good,” Hank said.

  She moved to the far counter to make the call and Hank took my free hand between both his palms.

  “I hope you don’t mind me inviting them. I think you’ll be happy they’re there though.”

  Dread filled the pit of my stomach until I thought I was going to be sick. The amusement left his face in a rush and he leaned over the counter to grab my shoulders.

  “Baby, are you okay? You just went pale as a ghost.”

  I shrugged and tried to laugh it off but couldn’t even summon a weak giggle. “Y-yeah. Yeah, I’m fine. Just tired I guess.”

  He nodded but didn’t’ look as if he remotely believed my lame excuse. I glanced over at Megan but she was still on the phone with her back to us. Hank squeezed my shoulders and pulled my attention back to him.

  “So, pizza okay for tonig
ht? Not too fancy?”

  He grinned and it eased my mind a bit. I smiled back and nodded. “Yeah, may as well. I’m sure I lost at least a pound in my cycling class this morning. Better get that put right back on my hips and ass.”

  He released me and threw his head back in a full-belly laugh that pulled a smile from me. I just couldn’t help it.

  “Oh yeah, we can’t have that. I like your ass just as it is,” he said with a wink.

  I sighed and my smile weakened. Why did he keep saying things like that?

  “Okay, we’re all set,” Megan said.

  She returned to my side and threw an arm around my shoulders as if she sensed I needed the comfort.

  “Perfect. I gotta go make a couple of phone calls. I’ll be waiting in my truck when you’re ready to go,” Hank said.

  He winked at me again before heading out the door and I watched him go with the dread still firmly in place.

  “What the hell just happened?” Megan asked. “When I walked away you were gaga over your pretty flowers then I turn back around and you look like your cat just died.”

  “I don’t have a cat,” I mumbled.

  She rolled her eyes and walked me over to the nearest chair. I fell into it, letting my roses rest limply in my lap.

  “I know you don’t have a cat, ya dingdong. But if you don’t snap out of this funk and figure out what’s going on with Hank you might have ten by this time next month. We’ll call you the crazy cat lady.”

  I wanted to laugh but just didn’t have the energy. She pulled up a second chair and sat facing me, waiting for my explanation. I inhaled a deep breath and let it out slowly to tell her my suspicions.

  “I have a bad feeling about tonight. Maybe he’s finally going to admit to having a girlfriend stashed somewhere.”

  “What? You’re nuts, Elle. I just saw the way he was looking at you. There can’t possibly be another woman.”

  “Well, he said I’d want you with me tonight…after he shows me whatever he’s got to show me.”

  “Oh my god!”

  She leapt out of her chair, hands over her mouth as she danced from foot to foot. It was almost enough to make me laugh. Almost but not quite.

  “What?” I asked, totally exasperated. “What’s got you all worked up?”

  She finally dropped her hands and leaned over, one hand on my shoulder, to look me in the eyes. “Don’t you see? He’s not going to introduce another woman. He’s going to propose.”

  It was my turn to jump out of my chair and stare at her as if she’d lost her mind. “What the hell? You’re nuts, Megan. There’s no way. After all I’ve put him through. Me?”

  She was nodding hard enough I thought her head might fall right off.

  “Yeah, and he still doesn’t want you to move out, right? In fact, I’ll bet all this talk of you moving has him spooked and he figures he needs to hold on with both hands before you try to leave again.”

  It made a weird sort of sense…and scared the hell out of me. “No. No way. He can’t be that crazy.”

  She laughed and plopped back down in her chair. “Why would wanting to marry you make him crazy?”

  I looked at her as if she were nuts. “I’m a mess!”

  She smiled and shook her head. The sympathy in her gaze almost started my waterworks going but I sniffed the tears back and sat too.

  “Oh, honey, you’re really not that bad. You’re pretty special to me and I’d bet good money to Hank too.”

  I didn’t really know how to respond. Luckily a few members walked in and I didn’t have to.

  The remainder of my shift passed in a blur and before I knew it Megan was pulling me along to the time clock. I had just put my card back in its slot when Craig walked in to the break room.

  “Hey, ladies, who wanted to know about vacations?” he asked.

  Megan and I both pointed at each other and he laughed.

  “Well, okay. It was me. But I’m sure she needs to know too,” I said.

  “That’s cool,” he replied. “Our fiscal year ends next month so you only have about six more weeks before you can take some time off. You both get two weeks this time around.”

  “Really?” we asked in unison.

  “Yup.”

  “Cool,” Megan said. “I’ll have to tell Sean.”

  “Yeah. I guess I should tell Hank too,” I said with much less enthusiasm.

  She turned a worried gaze my way but Craig didn’t seem to notice.

  “Just make sure you let me know the dates you want ASAP. We’ll have to look at seniority if anyone else wants the same dates.”

  “Okay,” we answered in unison again.

  He just shook his head and walked out with a laugh.

  “It might not matter after tonight,” I said.

  “Oh, will you stop that? I’m telling you there’s nothing to worry about.”

  I looked at my best friend in the whole world and prayed she was right. I just couldn’t think past the fear and dread in my gut. “Yeah, okay.”

  “Come on,” she said. “Our men are waiting.”

  I followed her, not at all certain one of the men waiting was really mine.

  Chapter Five

  We drove in silence with the low sound of a classic rock station playing on the radio. Hank had tried to engage me in conversation but must have gotten sick of my one-word answers. I was sick of telling him nothing was wrong. Sean’s headlights shined in the rearview mirror and it was a small comfort to know I had friends close by. Whatever tonight would bring, at least I wouldn’t be alone to face it. I wanted to laugh at the thought, after all my tough talk of being independent. Seems I was just a baby after all.

  “Penny for your thoughts,” Hank said.

  “They’re not worth that much.”

  “Can I be the judge of that, sweetheart? It’s really breaking my heart you feel like you can’t confide in me.”

  I glanced at him but he was watching the road. His profile held a serious expression that matched his tone.

  “I’m sorry. I was just thinking…I’m never going to really be independent, I guess.”

  He sighed and ran a hand across the back of his neck, keeping the other firmly on the wheel, but said nothing else.

  A couple of minutes later he pulled off the main road and turned into a neighborhood I’d never been in before. It wasn’t far from home and I’d seen it plenty of times but had never had reason to explore it. I briefly wondered if his girlfriend lived nearby and panic struck me before I pushed it away. Hank would never be so cruel as to take me to another woman’s house.

  He turned onto a quiet street with well-manicured lawns and pretty two-storied houses. When he turned into the driveway of one I damn near fainted on the spot. Maybe he would be so cruel?

  “We’re here,” he said unnecessarily as he killed the engine and turned to face me.

  I had no clue how to respond.

  “Before we go inside there’s something I need to say to you, Elle. I don’t know what’s been going on the past week or why, but I can tell you’re ready to bolt at the slightest provocation.”

  I automatically opened my mouth to protest, even if it was the truth, but he held up a hand to stop me.

  “Now, baby, you know it’s true. I don’t know what I’ve done to upset or scare you but I’m really sorry that I did. I just want you to know…god, I’m so in love with you, Elle. I didn’t want to tell you like this, here parked in my truck. But I feel like you need to know that before anything else comes your way.”

  I froze and every thought of another woman flew from my head.

  “Wha…you…you love me?”

  He smiled and my heart melted right in my chest.

  “Yeah, baby. I love you so damn much I can’t see straight. I have for a while but didn’t want to scare you off. I know you’re still trying to get over that asshole and want to be out on your own for a bit. But I really want you to stay with me…please.”

  How in the hell could I
possibly say no to that? I couldn’t and didn’t even try. Instead I took off my seatbelt and climbed right over the console, straight into his lap, or as much as I could be with the steering wheel in my way. He laughed and put a hand on my hip.

  “Hank, you have no idea how it makes me feel to hear that.”

  “Good I hope. Good enough to want to stay with me.”

  I sighed out a laugh more of relief than humor and nodded. “Yup. Definitely.”

  He grinned and I kissed him full on the mouth before I could talk myself out of it. When I pulled back all the humor was gone from his face.

  “You know, I think this is the first time you’ve kissed me.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Yeah. And I really liked it.”

  We both laughed until a sharp knock on the driver’s side window made me jump. My ass hit the horn and I jumped again at the sound. Outside, Megan and Sean belted out laughter.

  “Oh, really funny,” I said.

  Hank chuckled and lifted me over the console and back onto my seat. I went with a sigh.

  “Come on, beautiful, let’s get inside so you can see what’s kept me away from you so much lately.”

  And just like that my fear was back. Irrational since he’d just declared he loved me, I know. I climbed out of his truck on numb legs and Megan ran to my side with a huge grin on her face.

  “Well, I guess everything’s good?”

  I shrugged and stared at the house in dread. “I guess we’ll see when we get inside.”

  Her smile melted away and she hooked her arm in mine as we followed Hank to the front door. Sean brought up the rear silently.

  It was a very nice house with a cute wraparound porch and wooden shutters. The colors were warm and neutral like many on the street. It didn’t really stand out in any way. The short wrought-iron fence surrounding the front yard continued around to the sides where a taller wooden fence took over. There were padlocks on the gates.

  Hank didn’t bother to knock or ring the bell, just opened the front door and waved us inside. Megan and I looked at each other with identical expressions of confusion before stepping inside.

  “Well, there y’all are finally. Welcome!”

  Megan stiffened as a pretty blonde woman came toward us with her hand outstretched. I shook her hand automatically and Megan followed suit but didn’t seem too happy about it. As soon as the woman moved on to the men Megan pulled me farther into the room.