After I Fall

by Amity Hope

  His voice was so full of emotion; there was no way my resolve couldn’t melt a little bit. He was right. Despite our problems, I never doubted that Mom, and even Phillip, loved me. Not really. I may have questioned their methods, but never their love.

  “In some ways EmLynn, you are a spoiled little rich girl. I know you don’t want to see yourself that way, but you are. And you don’t even realize it. You don’t realize how amazing it is to have someone like Phillip who made sure you didn’t lose your car. Or someone like your mom who is begging to spend time with you. To take you shopping, and out to dinner, and on vacations. Maybe hiring a private investigator was a crappy thing to do, but you know she did it because she loves you. Do you have any idea how many kids don’t have that? How badly they want that and will probably never get it?”

  “No,” I said quietly. “I’ve never thought of it that way.”

  “Well, you should,” he said gently. “I get that your life isn’t perfect. I do. I get that. But imagine having a life so crappy that you don’t even want to own it. Please don’t judge me for that.”

  I crossed my arms over my stomach and blinked back tears.

  “I decided early on that if anyone asked about my parents, I was going to be vague. I’d say they were gone. I figured people would assume the worst, but I also assumed that meant they’d let the subject drop. That’s what I really wanted. I never imagined I’d say it to the one girl who it would actually mean something to.”

  “EmLynn?”

  I fought back a groan when my mother opened up the door and stepped inside. I had no doubt she’d seen Eric walking up. This was Mom, showing her love for me the way she did it best: by butting in.

  “Mom, really?”

  She gave Eric a cool once over.

  “I just wanted to know if you’d like to go shopping this afternoon. You could pick out a new dress for dinner with the Deverouxs tomorrow night. Of course Jace will be accompanying them. I heard from his mother that he’s very anxious to see you.”

  She smiled at me, but I knew her comment was intended for Eric.

  “Can we discuss this later?” I asked. I motioned toward the open door.

  “I would prefer that you two end your discussion now,” she said.

  “Mommy!” Natalie’s high pitched shriek split our conversation in half.

  Natalie wasn’t one for melodrama. A scream of that magnitude only meant one thing. She was terrified. That realization had only taken a split second to come to. Mom had come to it as well, as we shared an instantaneous, confused look.

  “Mommy!” Natalie shouted again.

  The three of us took off running toward the pool. The pool house was on the backside with a paved walkway lining the length of the pool and a gate at the opposite end. Hedges skirted the edges of the wrought iron fence, lending more privacy. I was silently cursing those hedges because they were blocking our view.

  Mom couldn’t move very fast in her strappy, heeled sandals. I wasn’t doing much better in my flip-flops. I stopped, wasting precious seconds as I kicked them off. In the instant it took me, Eric had already neared the pool. His long strides left us chasing after him.

  “Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!” Natalie’s shrieks continued to punctuate the air.

  “We’re coming!” I yelled.

  “I only left them alone for a minute!” Mom cried. Her voice was clogged with tears. “They were in the house! They were in the house!” she repeated.

  My mind was racing. Madison was only five, but she was a decent swimmer for her age. She could back float and she could doggy paddle. She’d been jumping in the deep end since before I’d come to live with them. For just a moment I couldn’t understand Natalie’s panic. If Madison had gone in the pool, she should be able to get herself back out again.

  Unless she hit her head. My heart clenched as my mind grasped the only scenario that made sense.

  Eric reached the wrought iron fence and quickly pulled the gate open. We reached the gate moments later, Mom squeezed in before me.

  Natalie was standing on the edge of the deep end, sobbing hysterically. I saw a flash of red hair as our sister bobbed to the surface and then went under again. Nanoseconds that felt like days passed by as I realized this time, she wasn’t coming up again.

  “Madison!” Mom shouted, her tone panicked and hysterical.

  Eric raced to the far side of the pool, catapulting himself into the water. He landed close to where we’d seen Madison disappear.

  I was only a step behind as Eric burst through the surface of the pool. He held my limp sister in his arms. He lugged her through the water. Mom and I met him at the edge. She reached for Madison pulling her onto the pebbled surface.

  “Madison! Madison!” Mom and I said in unison. Mom pulled her tangled hair out of her face. I shoved at the sopping wet princess gown that was tangled around her legs. The cape was tangled around her arms and chest. The heavy, drenched velvet had clearly been weighing her down.

  Her eyes were open…unfocused. A river of water spilled from the side of her mouth.

  “Roll her over,” Eric commanded as he hoisted himself out of the pool. He reached for my little sister, turning her onto her side. His hand connected with her back, giving her a hard thump between the shoulder blades. What seemed like an endless amount of water spewed from her mouth. The deluge was followed by the most horrific coughing I’d ever heard.

  The sound was beautiful. It meant that she was still breathing.

  Natalie continued to sob hysterically. I glanced at her but didn’t dare leave Madison’s side.

  “Are you alright?” Mom asked Madison.

  She began to sob in response. The sound of the twins sobbing in unison was almost earsplitting. I knew they were both terrified, but okay.

  I glanced over my shoulder. Eric reached for Natalie and she lunged at him. He picked her up. Her little legs wrapped around his waist and her arms looped in a stranglehold around his neck.

  I couldn’t hear his words over the wailing of the twins. He was holding her tightly and his lips were moving, likely speaking calming words to her. He patted her back gently and swayed ever so slightly with her.

  The entire nightmare had only lasted maybe a matter of minutes but it had felt like forever as each step played out in slow motion.

  I turned my attention back to Madison. Mom was coaxing her into calming down. Her hysterics eventually faded into quiet gasps for air.

  “I think she’s going to be okay,” Mom said. I was sure it was as much for her own benefit as it was for my mine and my sisters’.

  “Did you hear your Mom?” Eric asked. Natalie’s crying had begun to fade as well. She looked over at us. Her face was red, streaked with tears. Her long, curly hair was hopelessly tangled, sticky with teardrops. Her bottom lip quivered as she scanned over the scene before her. Her arms loosened from their death grip on Eric’s neck but she didn’t let him go completely.

  “It’s okay. You’re both fine,” he continued to sooth.

  Mom stood then swooped down, scooping Madison up in her arms.

  Madison’s tears had faded as well. Staccato sniffles still filled the air.

  “I’m going to bring her inside so I can get her dried off and into some dry clothes,” she said.

  I reached over and grasped Madison’s hand in mine. I gave it a squeeze. “You’re being really brave,” I told her.

  “You should go with your mom,” Eric said to Natalie. “I got you all wet. You need to get into dry clothes too.” He squatted down. I realized then the pool water was still streaming off of him. She reluctantly unwound her stick thin legs so he could place her on her feet. Her arms slowly untangled from his neck. Her pale pink shirt and shorts were covered in darker splotches where her clothing had absorbed the pool water coming off of Eric.

  She stood in front of him, seemingly hesitant to remove herself from the security she’d felt. He stood and took her hand, walking her over to Mom and me.

  “Thank you,” M
om said. Her voice was strained. Her eyes shimmered with tears. “She’s so little. I don’t know what would’ve happened if she was in there a moment longer than she was.”

  It hadn’t taken us very long to get to the pool, but in the moment it had felt like an eternity.

  Her words sent Madison off into another crying fit.

  I couldn’t blame her. I felt like crying too. The fear she felt was clearly evident on her face. She burrowed herself into Mom’s chest. Mom readjusted her, hefting her up, unused to the extra weight that the dress had absorbed.

  “Do you have her?” Eric asked. “Do you want me to carry her inside for you?”

  Mom turned to him with a grateful smile. “No. But thank you. I’ve got her.” She took a few steps away with Madison in her arms and Natalie clinging to the hem of her dress. She stopped briefly to look at Eric again. “Thank you. I feel like I can’t say it enough.”

  “Yeah,” Eric said as he shifted uncomfortably. “No problem.”

  Mom bit her lip and gave him a little nod. She turned again and this time she hurried to the house as quickly as her high heels would take her.

  An entire trio of ‘thank-yous’ from my mother, that was rare. So rare that I thought they were probably non-existent before this moment.

  “At the risk of sounding repetitive,” I started, “thank you. You were…that was…I was so scared. You jumped right in and…” I sucked in a strained breath of air as Eric reached over to wipe a tear off of my face. My head was such a mess that I hadn’t realized I was crying.

  Eric’s hands drifted down my arms, landing on my elbows. He pulled me toward him, just a tiny tug, but stopped and cringed. I realized he didn’t want to get me wet.

  I didn’t care. I stepped into him, instantly feeling the cold chill from his wet clothes seep into me. I didn’t care about that either. All I cared about was the fact that my sister was safe. And Eric’s arms were around me. His chest solidly against mine. I could feel his heart, still hammering as the adrenaline rush slowly faded.

  We stood that way for a few moments.

  “I’m glad she’s okay,” he finally said. “I didn’t really know what I was doing. I just remembered this video from health class. I remember them turning the victim over.”

  Victim.

  I shuddered as I realized how close my little sister had been to becoming a drowning victim. I stepped away from Eric and glanced at the house. My fingers tingled with nervous energy and my own heartbeat had yet to still.

  “I don’t want to worry anyone but you should tell your mom that she should bring Madison in to get checked out. Maybe she’s planning on it anyway,” he said. “But just be sure that she does. I heard about this thing, secondary drowning, it was on the news the other day. I’m sure Madison is fine but just to be safe…”

  I nodded as I swung my gaze back to him.

  “I should go in and check on them,” I said.

  He hesitated before nodding. “Yeah, yeah you should. I should head home. I need to get some dry clothes on.”

  We stood there in awkward silence for a moment. I knew I should say more but I wasn’t sure what. My thoughts were tangled, too jumbled to make it to my mouth. I was reluctant to leave him but I was also anxious to check on Madison.

  “Right,” he said. “You should go. If you get a chance could you just let me know how she’s doing?”

  “Absolutely,” I agreed.

  Eric didn’t budge. I realized he was waiting for me to make the first move. Finally, I did. My need to check on Madison outweighed my need to stay with Eric right then.

  I backed away saying, “I’ll give you a call later. To let you know, I mean.” I spun on my heel and hurried off to the house before he could respond. I glanced over my shoulder as I left the pool area through the gate. He was still rooted to the same spot. He was gazing out at the pool. A puddle of water had collected at his feet. He looked as stunned as I felt.

  Chapter 22

  By the next afternoon, Madison’s traumatic experience already seemed to be fading its way into a distant memory. I had stayed home with Natalie while Mom finagled an appointment with the girls’ very booked up pediatrician. We were all relieved that she’d come away from the ordeal with a clean bill of health.

  As promised, I had called Eric to let him know that Madison was going to be okay. The conversation was stilted, awkward, and as much as I had wanted to talk to him, I had also been anxious to cut the conversation short.

  Already my anger was fading. I didn’t entirely understand why he’d chosen to keep the truth from me. But hour by hour, it was becoming less important. Unfortunately at the moment it didn’t matter how I felt about that.

  I’d committed myself to a dinner with Jace. I had to follow through. It was the least I could do considering what Phillip had done for me.

  So now, here I was, sitting on the patio with Jace. The day had been a scorcher. I was wearing a lightweight, sleeveless dress. He’d shown up in dress pants, long sleeve shirt and tie. I fought back a smug smile as a bead of sweat scurried down his temple. I leaned back in the rattan patio chair and sipped my iced tea. My back was to the sun, leaving Jace to squint into it. For once, he looked as miserable as I felt.

  If it were anyone else, I’d feel bad about that. But it wasn’t just anyone. It was Jace. And as far as I was concerned, it was good for him to feel miserable once in a while.

  Our parents were inside, undoubtedly relishing the chill of the air conditioner.

  My sisters were most likely in the den, where I’d seen them last. The pediatrician had said that Madison should take it easy for a few days. Madison’s idea of taking it easy was to boss Natalie around. Natalie willingly complied. She seemed anxious to take care of her twin. She scurried after juice boxes, channel changes, Madison’s favorite blanket and whatever else our sister’s heart desired.

  Madison had spent the day lounging on the sofa. She was sprawled out imperiously, like the princess she deemed herself to be.

  “So,” Jace said and I reluctantly lifted my eyes to meet his. “Heard your sister took a little tumble into the water yesterday.”

  I tried to ignore the fact that he looked more amused than concerned.

  “She did. She was playing dress up and her shoe got caught on the edge of her dress. She fell into the pool.” My tone had a definite defensive edge. “It could’ve been serious. If Eric hadn’t gotten to her as quickly as he did, it could’ve been really bad.”

  Only a few more seconds…her small lungs filling with water…I pushed the thought away.

  Jace shifted in his chair. “Eric? Eric was here?” He frowned at me.

  I realized I probably shouldn’t have mentioned that. I didn’t want anything to jeopardize the deal Phillip had made. No need to antagonize the Deveroux family.

  I shrugged. “He stopped by to talk. It was no big deal.” Actually, it had been a very big deal. To me, anyway. I hadn’t been able to get our conversation out of my head. I’d been obsessing about everything he’d said.

  He had lied. But just maybe I could understand why. If I tried hard enough. If I gave it enough time.

  “Hello, Earth to Em,” Jace said. He nudged my foot with his.

  I realized then he’d been talking while my mind wandered off on another tangent.

  “What?” I asked distractedly.

  “I was just saying I told you Lover Boy was a loser.”

  His smugness made me want to kick him. Or worse.

  He’d pulled me back to reality for that?

  The French door swung open and I’d never been so happy to see my mom.

  “Dinner is ready. Please come join us,” she said.

  Her timing couldn’t have been more perfect.

  * * *

  After a meal full of pretentious chatter I found myself relieved when Jace excused himself. I didn’t particularly care where he’d gone. I was just relieved to have him gone.

  Now that the sun had gone down, pulling the summery tem
ps with it, my parents and Jace’s moved out onto the patio for after dinner drinks. I moved with them for no other reason than to avoid Jace. The twins were playing in the yard. Or at least, we thought they were until Natalie crept onto the deck. She tiptoed up to me, keeping a wary eye on the Deverouxs, who she still regarded as strangers.

  “I can’t find Madison,” she whispered.

  Mom and Phillip were providing obligatory laughs over something that Carl had said. It was clear that Mom wasn’t really paying attention to Jace’s dad. The moment Natalie’s words were out, Mom’s smile slipped away. She leaned forward, placing her wine glass on the table.

  “Natalie, what do you mean you can’t find your sister?” Mom’s eyes began scanning the yard. Her body was tense. She looked ready to fly out of her chair.

  “We were playing hide and seek. I don’t know where she went,” Natalie said in her quiet, barely there voice.

  Mom did fly out of her chair then. Phillip was only a second behind her.

  “Madison!” Mom shouted as she hurried into the yard.

  “I’ll check the pool,” Phillip said. Already an edge of fear had crept into his tone.

  “Madison! Come out right now!” Mom shouted.

  I glanced at Jace’s parents. They wore looks of irritation, as if they couldn’t believe their fancy dinner was now being ruined by a pesky child.

  It was easy to see where Jace inherited his lack of compassion.

  I pushed back my own chair and darted into the house. The girls had been playing in the yard, but maybe Madison had needed to use the bathroom. I checked the first bathroom I came to, it was empty. I hurried down the hallway, past Phillip’s study.

  I poked my head inside the den. The television was on, a Disney movie playing. The last person I expected to find in here was Jace. He didn’t look like he expected to see me either.

  His eyes widened and he clenched the phone he held to his ear. “Uh, I gotta go. I’ll call you back.”