Complete Works of George Moore

by George Moore

  As he rode his bicycle down the lonely road to Bridget’s cottage, the thought passed through his mind that if Nora Glynn were a stupid, intelligent woman no objection would have been raised against her. ‘An independent mind is very objectionable to the ecclesiastic,’ he said to himself as he leaped off his bicycle.... ‘Nora Glynn. How well suited the name is to her. There is a smack in the name. Glynn, Nora Glynn,’ he repeated, and it seemed to him that the name belonged exclusively to her.

  A few days after this first meeting he met her about two miles from Garranard; he was on his bicycle, she was on hers, and they both leaped instinctively from their machines. What impressed him this time far more than her looks was her happy, original mind. While walking beside her he caught himself thinking that he had never seen a really happy face before. But she was going to be sent away because she was happy and wore her soul in her face.

  They had seemed unable to get away from each other, so much had they to say. He mentioned his brother James, who was doing well in America and would perhaps one day send them the price of a harmonium. She told him she couldn’t play on the wheezy old thing at Garranard, and at the moment he clean forgot that the new harmonium would avail her little, since Father Peter was going to get rid of her; he only remembered it as he got on his bicycle, and he returned home ready to espouse her cause against anybody.

  She must write to the Archbishop, and if he wouldn’t do anything she must write to the papers. Influence must be brought to bear, and Father Peter must be prevented from perpetrating a gross injustice. He felt that it would be impossible for him to remain Father Peter’s curate if the schoolmistress were sent away for no fault of hers, merely because she wore a happy face. What Father Peter would have done if he had lived no one would ever know. He might have dismissed her; even so the injustice would have been slight compared with what had happened to her; and the memory of the wrong that had been done to her put such a pain into his heart that he seemed to lose sight of everything, till a fish leaping in the languid lake awoke him, and he walked on, absorbed in the memory of his mistake, his thoughts swinging back to the day he had met her on the roadside, and to the events that succeeded their meeting. Father Peter was taken ill, two days after he was dead, before the end of the week he was in his coffin; and it was left to him to turn Nora Glynn out of the parish. No doubt other men had committed faults as grave as his; but they had the strength to leave the matter in the hands of God, to say: ‘I can do nothing, I must put myself in the hands of God; let him judge. He is all wise.’ He hadn’t their force of character. He believed as firmly as they did, but, for some reason which he couldn’t explain to himself, he was unable to leave the matter in God’s hands, and was always thinking how he could get news of her.

  If it hadn’t been for that woman, for that detestable Mrs. O’Mara, who was the cause of so much evil-speaking in the parish!... And with his heart full of hatred so black that it surprised him, he asked himself if he could forgive that woman. God might, he couldn’t. And he fell to thinking how Mrs. O’Mara had long been a curse upon the parish. Father Peter was more than once compelled to speak about her from the altar, and to make plain that the stories she set going were untrue. Father Peter had warned him, but warnings are no good; he had listened to her convinced at the time that it was wrong and foolish to listen to scandalmongers, but unable to resist that beguiling tongue, for Mrs. O’Mara had a beguiling tongue — fool that he was, that he had been. There was no use going over the wretched story again; he was weary of going over it, and he tried to put it out of his mind. But it wouldn’t be put out of his mind, and in spite of himself he began to recall the events of the fatal day. He had been out all the morning, walking about with an engineer who was sent down by the Board of Works to consider the possibility of building the bridge, and had just come in to rest. Catherine had brought him a cup of tea; he was sitting by the window, almost too tired to drink it. The door was flung open. If Catherine had only asked him if he were at home to visitors, he would have said he wasn’t at home to Mrs. O’Mara, but he wasn’t asked; the door was flung open, and he found himself face to face with the parish magpie. And before he could bless himself she began to talk to him about the bridge, saying that she knew all about the engineer, how he had gotten his appointment, and what his qualifications were. It is easy to say one shouldn’t listen to such gossips, but it is hard to shut one’s ears or to let what one hears with one ear out the other ear, for she might be bringing him information that might be of use to him. So he listened, and when the bridge, and the advantage of it, had been discussed, she told him she had been staying at the convent. She had tales to tell about all the nuns and about all the pupils. She told him that half the Catholic families in Ireland had promised to send their daughters to Tinnick if Eliza succeeded in finding somebody who could teach music and singing. But Eliza didn’t think there was anyone in the country qualified for the post but Nora Glynn. If Mrs. O’Mara could be believed, Eliza said that she could offer Nora Glynn more money than she was earning in Garranard. Until then he had only half listened to Mrs. O’Mara’s chatter, for he disliked the woman — her chatter amused him only as the chatter of a bird might; but when he heard that his sister was trying to get his schoolmistress away from him he had flared up. ‘Oh, but I don’t think that your schoolmistress would suit a convent school. I shouldn’t like my daughter—’ ‘What do you mean?’ Her face changed expression, and in her nasty mincing manner she began to throw out hints that Nora Glynn would not suit the nuns. He could see that she was concealing something — there was something at the back of her mind. Women of her sort want to be persuaded; their bits of scandal must be dragged from them by force; they are the unwilling victims who would say nothing if they could help it. She had said enough to oblige him to ask her to speak out, and she began to throw out hints about a man whom Nora used to meet on the hillside (she wouldn’t give the man’s name, she was too clever for that). She would only say that Nora had been seen on the hillside walking in lonely places with a man. Truly a detestable woman! His thoughts strayed from her for a moment, for it gave him pleasure to recollect that he had defended his schoolmistress. Didn’t he say: ‘Now, then, Mrs. O’Mara, if you have anything definite to say, say it, but I won’t listen to vague charges.’ ‘Charges — who is making charges?’ she asked, and he had unfortunately called her a liar. In the middle of the row she dropped a phrase: ‘Anyhow, her appearance is against her.’ And it was true that Nora Glynn’s appearance had changed in the last few months. Seeing that her words had a certain effect, Mrs. O’Mara quieted down; and while he stood wondering if it could possibly be true that Nora had deceived them, that she had been living in sin all these months, he suddenly heard Mrs. O’Mara saying that he was lacking in experience — which was quite true, but her way of saying it had roused the devil in him. Who was she that she should come telling him that he lacked experience? To be sure, he wasn’t an old midwife, and that’s what Mrs. O’Mara looked like, sitting before him.

  He had lost control of himself, saying, ‘Now, will you get out of this house, you old scandalmonger, or I’ll take you by the shoulders and put you out!’ And he had thrown the front-door open. What a look she gave him as she passed out! At that moment the clock struck three and he remembered suddenly that the children were coming out of school at that moment. It would have been better if he had waited. But he couldn’t wait: he’d have gone mad if he had waited; and he recalled how he had jumped into the road, squeezed through the stile, and run across the field. ‘Why all this hurry?’ he had asked himself.

  She was locking up the desks; the children went by him, curtseying, and he had to wait till the last one was past the door. Nora must have guessed his errand, for her face noticeably hardened. ‘I’ve seen Mrs. O’Mara,’ he blurted out, ‘and she tells me that you’ve been seen walking with some man on the hillside in lonely places.... Don’t deny it if it is true.’ ‘I’m not going to deny anything that is true.’ How brave she was!
Her courage attracted him and softened his heart. But everything was true, alas! Everything. She told him that her plans were to steal out of the parish without saying a word to anyone, for she was determined not to disgrace him or the parish. She was thinking of him in all her trouble, and everything might have ended well if he had not asked her who the man was. She would not say, nor give any reasons why she wouldn’t do so. Only this, that if the man had deserted her she didn’t want anybody to bring him back, if he could be brought back; if the man were dead it were better to say nothing about him. ‘But if it were his fault?’ ‘I don’t see that that would make any difference.’

  They went out of the school-house talking in quite a friendly way. There was a little drizzle in the air, and, opening her umbrella, she said, ‘I’m afraid you’ll get wet.’ ‘Get wet, get wet! what matter?’ he had answered impatiently, for the remark annoyed him. By the hawthorn-bush he began to tell her again that it would relieve his mind to know who the man was. She tried to get away from him, but he wouldn’t let her go; and catching her by the arm he besought her, saying that it would relieve his mind. How many times had he said that? But he wasn’t able to persuade her, notwithstanding his insistence that as a priest of the parish he had a right to know. No doubt she had some very deep reason for keeping her secret, or perhaps his authoritative manner was the cause of her silence. However this might be, any words would have been better than ‘it would relieve my mind to know who the man was.’ ‘Stupid, stupid, stupid!’ he muttered to himself, and he wandered from the cart-track into the wood.

  It was impossible to say now why he had wished to press her secret from her. It would be unpleasant for him, as priest of the parish, to know that the man was living in the parish; but it would be still more unpleasant if he knew who the man was. Nora’s seducer could be none other than one of the young soldiers who had taken the fishing-lodge at the head of the lake. Mrs. O’Mara had hinted that Nora had been seen with one of them on the hill, and he thought how on a day like this she might have been led away among the ferns. At that moment there came out of the thicket a floating ball of thistle-down. ‘It bloweth where it listeth,’ he said. ‘Soldier or shepherd, what matter now she is gone?’ and rising to his feet and coming down the sloping lawn, overflowing with the shade of the larches, he climbed through the hawthorns growing out of a crumbled wall, and once at the edge of the lake, he stood waiting for nothing seemingly but to hear the tiresome clanking call of the stonechat, and he compared its reiterated call with the words ‘atonement,’ ‘forgiveness,’ ‘death,’ ‘calamity,’ words always clanking in his heart, for she might be lying at the bottom of the lake, and some day a white phantom would rise from the water and claim him.

  His thoughts broke away, and he re-lived in memory the very agony of mind he had endured when he went home after her admission that she was with child. All that night, all next day, and for how many days? Would the time ever come when he could think of her without a pain in his heart? It is said that time brings forgetfulness. Does it? On Saturday morning he had sat at his window, asking himself if he should go down to see her or if he should send for her. There were confessions in the afternoon, and expecting that she would come to confess to him, he had not sent for her. One never knows; perhaps it was her absence from confession that had angered him. His temper took a different turn that evening. All night he had lain awake; he must have been a little mad that night, for he could only think of the loss of a soul to God, and of God’s love of chastity. All night long he had repeated with variations that it were better that all which our eyes see — this earth and the stars that are in being — should perish utterly, be crushed into dust, rather than a mortal sin should be committed; in an extraordinary lucidity of mind he continued to ponder on God’s anger and his own responsibility towards God, and feeling all the while that there are times when we lose control of our minds, when we are a little mad. He foresaw his danger, but he could not do else than rise from his bed and begin to prepare his sermon, for he had to preach, and he could only preach on chastity and the displeasure sins against chastity cause to God. He could think but of this one thing, the displeasure God must feel against Nora and the seducer who had robbed her of the virtue God prized most in her. He must have said things that he would not have said at any other time. His brain was on fire that morning, and words rose to his lips — he knew not whence nor how they came, and he had no idea now of what he had said. He only knew that she left the church during his sermon; at what moment he did not know, nor did he know that she had left the parish till next day, when the children came up to tell him there was no schoolmistress. And from that day to this no news of her, nor any way of getting news of her.

  His thoughts went to the hawthorn-trees, for he could not think of her any more for the moment, and it relieved his mind to examine the green pips that were beginning to appear among the leaves. ‘The hawthorns will be in flower in another week,’ he said; and he began to wonder at the beautiful order of the spring. The pear and the cherry were the first; these were followed by the apple, and after the apple came the lilac, the chestnut, and the laburnum. The forest trees, too, had their order. The ash was still leafless, but it was shedding its catkins, and in another fifteen days its light foliage would be dancing in the breeze. The oak was last of all. At that moment a swallow flitted from stone to stone, too tired to fly far, and he wondered whence it had come. A cuckoo called from a distant hill; it, too, had been away and had come back.

  His eyes dwelt on the lake, refined and wistful, with reflections of islands and reeds, mysteriously still. Rose-coloured clouds descended, revealing many new and beautiful mountain forms, every pass and every crest distinguishable. It was the hour when the cormorants come home to roost, and he saw three black specks flying low about the glittering surface; rising from the water, they alighted with a flutter of wings on the corner wall of what remained of Castle Hag, ‘and they will sleep there till morning,’ he said, as he toiled up a little path, twisting through ferns and thorn-bushes. At the top of the hill was his house, the house Father Peter had built. Its appearance displeased him, and he stood for a long time watching the evening darkening, and the yacht being towed home, her sails lowered, the sailors in the rowing-boat. ‘They will be well tired before they get her back to Tinnick;’ and he turned and entered his house abruptly.

  III

  CATHERINE’S CURIOSITY WAS a worry. As if he knew why he hadn’t come home to his dinner! If she’d just finish putting the plates on the table and leave him. Of course, there had been callers. One man, the man he especially wished to see, had driven ten miles to see him. It was most unfortunate, but it couldn’t be helped; he had felt that morning that he couldn’t stay indoors — the business of the parish had somehow got upon his nerves, but not because he had been working hard. He had done but little work since she left the parish. Now was that story going to begin again? If it did, he should go out of his mind; and he looked round the room, thinking how a lonely evening breeds thoughts of discontent.

  Most of the furniture in the room was Father Peter’s. Father Peter had left his curate his furniture, but the pretty mahogany bookcase and the engravings upon the walls were Father Oliver’s own taste; he had bought them at an auction, and there were times when these purchases pleased him. But now he was thinking that Father Peter must have known to whom the parish would go at his death, for he could not have meant all his furniture to be taken out of the house— ‘there would be no room for it in Bridget Clery’s cottage;’ and Father Oliver sat thinking of the evenings he used to spend with Father Peter. How often during those evenings Father Peter must have said to himself, ‘One day, Gogarty, you will be sitting in my chair and sleeping in my bed.’ And Father Oliver pondered on his affection for the dead man. There were no differences of opinion, only one — the neglected garden at the back of the house; and, smiling sadly, Father Oliver remembered how he used to reprove the parish priest.

  ‘I’m afraid I’m too big and to
o fat and too fond of my pipe and my glass of whisky to care much about carnations. But if you get the parish when I’m gone, I’m sure you’ll grow some beauties, and you’ll put a bunch on my grave sometimes, Gogarty.’ The very ring of the dead man’s voice seemed to sound through the lonely room, and, sitting in Father Peter’s chair, with the light of Father Peter’s lamp shining on his face and hand, Father Oliver’s thoughts flowed on. It seemed to him that he had not understood and appreciated Father Peter’s kindliness, and he recalled his perfect good nature. ‘Death reveals many things to us,’ he said; and he lifted his head to listen, for the silence in the house and about the house reminded him of the silence of the dead, and he began to consider what his own span of life might be. He might live as long as Father Peter (Father Peter was fifty-five when he died); if so, twenty-one years of existence by the lake’s side awaited him, and these years seemed to him empty like a desert — yes, and as sterile. ‘Twenty-one years wondering what became of her, and every evening like this evening — the same loneliness.’