Beyond Ruin (Book Four of the Bidden Series)

by Cierlak, Crystal

  Natalie hadn't thought about Graham Martin since the day he essentially offered to save her job if she made sure James wouldn't pull his account from Brighton New Media. Once again Brighton looked to be the biggest loser in the failed relationship of Natalie Harlow and James Fitzgerald.

  "That good, huh?" she mused between sips of water.

  "Natalie how did you manage Fitson and all of your other accounts while at Brighton?" Joe asked.

  She shrugged. "I had a large team helping me at Brighton."

  "We're going to need more than just a few interns to handle all of this new work," Joe sighed, mostly to himself. "We'll also need someone experienced to come in and handle accounts receivable," he said as he looked up at Natalie. "And we should have at least one other account manager." He looked up at the sound of the landline ringing, and moved to answer it.

  "Do we have a job description we can push out across our social media today? We could probably get a few applications before Monday, which would help start the process."

  "I have a template version in our internal docs here," Quinn responded, setting to work on her laptop. “Though if you really want to get the word out I know there are a few former and current Brighton employees who would probably be interested."

  Natalie nodded. "Sure. But let's keep Fitson on the down-low for now. I don't want any rumors circulating that we're poaching Brighton clients or talent. We can start figuring out how we're going to expand when I get back from lunch," she said as she checked the time display on her phone.

  "Who was that?" Quinn asked when Joe returned to the kitchen island with an ashen look of surprise on his face.

  "Uh, that was Scott downstairs at the front desk." He looked to Natalie. "James Fitzgerald just pulled up to valet in a white Bugatti Veyron."

  Natalie and Quinn exchanged looks, each of them gasping audibly in tandem. As if on cue the doorbell rang, and Natalie found her legs were shaking as she walked to the front door. She didn't even bother checking the peep hole.

  James Fitzgerald looked casual in a white cotton tee shirt that Natalie knew from experience was the $300 designer version, and a pair of jeans in the perfect shade of dark rinse. He looked, as always, like the world's most sought after male model.

  "Good morning," he greeted with a smile before leaning in to kiss her cheek. In her equally expensive footwear she was nearly as tall as him, a fact that, for some reason, delighted her.

  "You didn't really come pick me up for the world's earliest lunch in a white Bugatti Veyron, did you?" were the first words out of her mouth. She'd joked in the past about wanting one, but knew there was no way in hell he'd actually buy her one.

  "I only said I'd pick you up at this time, not that we'd be eating right away."

  Curiosity got the better of her. "Where are we going?"

  "You'll see," he said, his eyes glimmering, his lips curled into a charming smile. "Ready to go?"

  Heads turned. People stared. From the moment they stepped out of the building they had the attention of every single person they came across. On the freeway people moved out of their way and slowed down just to see what was arguably the world's sexiest supercar driving past.

  "You're pretty quiet over there," James mused as he expediently transitioned onto the 101. 'Over there' was an understatement. The vehicle's interior was like being in a spaceship, and Natalie never felt more comfortable hugged in the supple leather of her seat. But it was small, small enough to imbue her senses with the scent of his cologne and freshly washed hair.

  "I'm debating how impolite it would be to ask if this is a rental or if you actually bought this Bugatti Veyron." Natalie side glanced at James, admiring how utterly relaxed and cool he looked with one hand casually on the steering wheel, the other arm resting next to hers on the middle console.

  "It's on loan," he said with a smile. "I wanted this day to be memorable."

  "It is definitely that. I think it's safe to say you could take me to McDonalds for lunch and I would still be impressed."

  "I'll keep that in mind next time." His index finger grazed against the profile of her hand alongside her pinky. She kept absolutely still, careful to neither encourage nor discourage him.

  "So where are you taking me, James?"

  "I am taking you to Santa Barbara, Natalie. Montecito to be exact."

  Oh. Natalie reached into her bag for her purse and started composing a quick message to Quinn.

  "Am I boring you already?"

  "No, of course not! I'm just letting Quinn know I'm going to be back later than planned." She sent the message and set the phone down in her lap. "We were just offered a really big account and we're trying to figure out how to accommodate it."

  "A big account, huh? Anyone of interest?" he asked, playing along.

  "Could be. The CCO kind of has a crush on me," she joked.

  "How embarrassing. Hopefully he's a perfect gentleman."

  "I hear he's something of a tyrant, actually."

  James glanced quickly in her direction. "And what do you think?"

  Natalie considered her response carefully. The familiarity of James meant it was all too easy to slip into flirtatious conversation and innuendo. She had to remind herself that they hadn't been together in months, and that soon they would be working together again, closer than ever. She had to tread carefully.

  "I think it's none of my business," she said quietly. Her phone vibrated in her lap, the screen displaying the name of Harry Brucker's assistant. "Sorry, I have to take this. Hi Angelah! How are you?"

  "Hi Natalie. I'm good, thanks for asking. Hey, sorry to call you on a Saturday but I know you wanted to know the scheduling for next month as soon as possible."

  "Oh, no worries. Actually would you mind calling Quinn and giving her the details?"

  "I'd be happy to. Let me know if you'd like me to arrange for any accommodations."

  "I think we'll just book a suite somewhere nearby, but if anything changes I'll let you know."

  "Okay, great! I'll give Quinn a call right now. Bye, Natalie."

  "Bye, Angelah." Natalie disconnected the call and tapped on Joe's name, connecting a new call. "Hey, it's me. Angelah is calling Quinn now with the details for Vegas next month."

  "Can't wait to see how we're going to fit that into the schedule," he replied sarcastically.

  "I think it helps to not think about it in too great a detail," she laughed. "Did Quinn get the job listing posted out yet?"

  "Strangely enough she wanted to take a shower and get dressed before spending her Saturday working."

  Natalie narrowed her eyes, even though he couldn't see. "You're being sarcastic, right?"

  "Natalie you haven't even been gone a full half hour yet. And aren't you supposed to be on a date?"

  She rolled her eyes and fought the urge to tell him that it wasn't a date. "Text me if you need me."

  "Don't worry. We've got it covered, Red. We'll catch you up when you get back."

  "Yeah, that might be a while," she said guiltily. "We're driving up to Santa Barbara." There was an uncomfortable pause on the other end of the line, the subtext of which was potentially too complicated to consider in the moment. Or maybe it was just her? "Anyway. I'll see you later this afternoon."

  "Have fun. Bye."

  "Bye."

  Natalie set the phone back down in her lap and turned to stare out the window. Traffic was decent for an early Saturday afternoon, and they were well on their way out of the city and headed towards Calabasas.

  "You're awfully quiet," James said after a long stretch of silence.

  "Just thinking," she answered.

  "So business with Joe is working out well?"

  "You should know. You did just hire us."

  "I mostly meant living and working together under the same roof."

  "Quinn's there, too. It's not entirely unlike a college dormitory sometimes. A really fancy college dormitory."

  "As far as million dollar condos go, at least," he offered,
though she couldn't tell if he was also being sarcastic.

  "It beats the tiny apartment I was renting, which, if you can believe it, was a considerable upgrade from the apartment I was renting before that. You know, when we first met."

  "I liked your apartment."

  Natalie caught his eye as she glanced in his direction, hoping to see for herself if it was sentiment he was effusing, or if he was just being kind.

  "Audra filled me in on some of the details of the divorce and custody arrangements."

  "Did she?" James used his thumb to crack the knuckles of the hand that rested near Natalie. The rest of his body seemed to stiffen almost instantly.

  "It all seems so... civil."

  "What other option is there when there are children involved?"

  Children. Any time she remembered that Celine was very much pregnant with James' child the numbness that had engulfed her heart lifted just enough to reopen the wound that at times threatened to suffocate her.

  Don't fall apart, Natalie. Not now. She cleared her throat and stretched her head from side to side.

  "There's a Starbucks off of Parkway Calabasas. Would you mind stopping, please?"

  "Sure."

  There was a distinct chord of tension between them, and Natalie was dying to get out of the car and regroup. She busied herself with email on her phone as James exited the freeway and joined the mid-morning crawl of traffic of the suburban city. She had her bag in one hand and her other hand on the door handle before James was fully parked in a spot.

  "I'll be right back." Ignoring the turning heads of onlookers, Natalie headed straight into the coffee shop and made a beeline for the bathroom. She barely got the door closed before the first tears came, welling up in her eyes with a stinging heat.

  No, no, no. Don't cry here. She wiped at the tears before they could drop onto her cheeks. What am I even doing here? I should be at home working, building my life. It was a conversation she'd had with herself whenever she felt a sliver of pain over the loss of James and the life she once carried inside her. There was little point in dwelling on the negative, not when she'd worked so hard to pick up the pieces of her life and reassemble them into something she hoped was better than what she started with.

  A soft knock at the door was all the convincing she needed to pull herself back together.

  "Just a minute!" she called out. She quickly relieved herself, then washed up and searched through her bag for some hand cream. When she found a pair of oversized sunglasses instead she slipped them over her face and observed her reflection. There. It was as if it had never happened.

  Feeling more like herself again, Natalie exited the bathroom and made her way to the register to order. To her surprise James was standing only a few feet away, a venti-sized drink in his hand.

  "You still like the hot white mocha, right?" He held the drink out to her and she took it with a brief smile and a quick 'thank you'. "I'm sorry about what I said. I should have considered my words more carefully."

  "It's fine,” she said breezily. "Thanks for the coffee."

  He looked a bit unsure of himself, of her, but only hesitated a moment before turning to head back to the car, gesturing with his hand to follow behind her.

  I can do this, Natalie chanted to herself. It's only lunch.

  CHAPTER TEN

  They made casual conversation the rest of the drive north alongside the ocean, but Natalie was aloof and curt when answering questions, opting not to elaborate when he asked her about what she'd been doing with her life in the months since their breakup. He'd fucked up, and the sunglasses she wore that covered half her face did little to hide the fact that she had been upset; she was hiding her feelings.

  Knowing he had caused her pain, however acutely, ate at him from the inside. She reclined in her seat, head turned to look out at the mountains that bordered the freeway on the east side, her arm draped leisurely over the leather padded center console. He longed to touch her, to graze his finger across her skin again. He’d come to know the many versions of Natalie in the expanse of time they’d known each other, which in hindsight seemed unrightfully brief, but Closed-off Natalie was new to him. He didn’t know how to approach Closed-off Natalie.

  Her cell phone vibrated in her lap for the nth time and she was quick to answer it, curling her body in closer to her side of the car. “Hey,” she greeted, her voice low but dulcet. “No, I’m not at home.” He could barely hear what she was saying, but thought he heard her say something about Santa Barbara.

  It was hard not to listen in, but he was curious. There seemed to be so much about Natalie that had changed in the months since she broke up with him. It wasn’t just the hair or the weight loss. She was different. Changed.

  “No, um, I’m with James.”

  His ears burned. Who was she talking to? Not Quinn or Joe; they already knew she was with him.

  “I’m not sure. Later this afternoon.” Something the person on the other side of the line made her laugh, and James felt his heart fall inside his chest. She could barely look at him, and it was someone else whose words made her laugh. Whoever it was James envied them. And possibly despised them.

  “Monday night it is then. Don’t worry, my expectations are set reasonably high.” Another laugh. “Okay. I know. You too. Bye.” Natalie set the phone back down in her lap and cupped her chin with her hand as she stared out the window, so far away from him, so closed off. In that moment, as they drove through the oceanside city of Summerland just minutes south of Montecito, James began to doubt himself.

  Natalie swept her thumb absentmindedly across the smooth case of her phone when it vibrated again, drawing her attention away from the scenic views all around them. She turned the phone over in her lap and glanced at the screen.

  ‘Joe: Listing is up. Quinn is reaching out to some people at Brighton.’

  ‘Good. Have you looked at the intern apps I sent you yet?’ she replied.

  ‘Joe: I am now.’

  ‘Joe: BTW you looked good in my shirt.’

  Natalie felt her cheeks flush. First Audra, now Joe. Never before had she had so much romantic interaction all at one time.

  An old memory as clear as though it had only just happened came unbidden to mind.

  ‘This looks familiar,’ James whispered.

  Natalie shut her eyes as her mind traveled back in time to the source of the memory, every sense from the first night she met James coming out of the shadows. Satiated from both food and sex, she had slipped on a tee shirt belonging to James - then a stranger to her - to sleep in.

  ‘Sorry. I sort of borrowed it from your suitcase.’

  His eyes followed his fingers as they moved across the smooth cotton hem from her hip to stomach, then beneath the fabric hovering just above her skin.

  His cologne stained shirt was still her favorite thing to sleep in.

  Natalie swiped out of Joe’s message thread and scrolled down to the very bottom of the screen, past all the dozens upon dozens of text messages she exchanged with friends, colleagues, clients and her family. There, like a bookmark in an old tome she’d never managed to finish reading, was the last thing James Fitzgerald said to her.

  'Gentleman Twelve: I love you. No matter what.’

  The last thing until he showed up at her house for gelato less than twenty-four hours prior.

  She let out a deeply held breath and felt something intangible lift from her chest.

  “So why Montecito? Is the lunch in Los Angeles not as good?”

  James expelled a chuckle through his lips that sounded more like a breath. “I thought it might be nice to get out of the city and go somewhere we’d never been to. At least not together.”

  “I think you talked about wanting to go to Santa Barbara for a weekend way back when.” Back in happier times, she thought to herself.

  James slowed the vehicle as he transitioned into the far right lane. “I did. There’s something about this place that makes me feel so relaxed.” He made a smooth
exit off the freeway and turned left toward the ocean, driving along a road that looked like it wasn’t traveled too often.

  “So where exactly are we going? I don’t see any restaurants nearby?” She didn’t see much of anything nearby, save for a few older houses.

  “The restaurant is coming to us,” he said. Another turn and the Bugatti was parallel to the ocean heading towards a small but well-maintained park. There was an even smaller parking lot adjacent to the park, big enough for the Bugatti and one other vehicle - an unadorned commercial van with its back doors opened. Two men dressed in white button-down shirts with black pants were making quick work of unloading equipment from the back of the van.

  “What’s all this?”

  James engaged the parking break and shut off the engine. “This is lunch,” he announced. “Come on, Harlow.”

  Everything was set up to James’ exact specifications. A white tent stood erect on the sandy shore of the beach, its canvas flaps swaying gently against the cool Pacific breeze. A table with two chairs had been placed beneath the opening of the tent, and two tall heaters flanked the table on either side. Some several feet away a makeshift kitchen was being setup by the two men in white shirts.

  At the center of the table sat a voluminous bouquet of long stem roses in various shades of pink and cream. Each side of the table was set with bone china plates, crystal glasses and thick linen napkins wrapped in golden colored ribbon. The entire effect was soft, subtle, and elegant through and through.

  James reached out to put his hand at her elbow, but stopped mid-way, retracting the limb back to his side. Instead he watched as Natalie’s eye swept across the scene, taking everything in. How he wished he knew what she was thinking.

  “Natalie? You okay?”

  She turned to look at him, her expression as unreadable as her thoughts. If anything she looked confused. “I think this is single-handedly the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for me.”

  I overdid it, he thought to himself. “You’re right.” He grabbed for the vase of flowers - Jesus Christ, these are heavy - and handed them to one of the men, who had just happened to pass by at that moment. “That better?”