Trying to Survive (The Kiser #1)

by Hannah Davenport

  “Ready to go?” He asked, smiling down at me.

  “Ready.” Ready to go, ready to start living, ready to finally start a new chapter…

  The End!

  Almost (Read on for more)

  Austin

  Prologue

  Sitting at dad’s grave, I have no idea how to move on. We just buried him last week and mom cries every day. I have to be strong for her; I have to be the man of the house. That’s what dad would want. “Hey dad. I miss you. I don’t know what to do, how to help mom. She cries all the time and I feel helpless.” Wiping the tears from my eyes, “You weren’t supposed to die!” I said forcefully, wanting to change everything back to the way it was, wanting to kill the man that did this to us. “Playing my guitar is the only way I can relieve this pain I feel in my chest. Last week, when I had to carry mom away from here, I wrote you a song. I haven’t played it for anyone, just you dad.” Pulling my guitar onto my lap, I began to strum a melody before I started to sing.

  I woke up this morning

  To a another day

  I don’t feel the same

  As I did yesterday

  They keep telling me

  It’s gonna be alright

  But they’re not the ones

  That sleep with our memories at night

  What am I supposed to do

  I can’t stand the thoughts of leaving you

  Although it may be the cold dark truth

  They say except it

  But I don’t want to

  I don’t want to

  Wiping the tears away, “Sorry dad. I thought I could sing the whole song, but I can’t, not yet. I feel so lost, and I don’t know what to do. All I know is that I miss you dad. SO. DAMN. MUCH!

  Thank you for reading Trying to Survive! You bought the book (which I thank you for), and if you’re here, you’ve read it so please take a few minutes to leave a review. Reviews are very important to me so to make it easier on you, just click here.

  Austin’s story will be available in 2016. If you would like to be notified, you can sign-up to receive my e-mail when the next book is available by clicking here. Read on for the first chapter.

  Play List

  Holder & Bowen

  I Don’t Want To!

  Available on ITunes

  Click here

  Or to hear the song on YouTube and get a glimpse of the author

  Click here

  Although this is a work of fiction, there are some aspects of the story that are true. PCD is a real lung disease that goes undiagnosed in mild patients. There are under 500 people diagnosed in the United States with an estimated 25,000 who actually have it. If you, or anyone you know is suspected of having Cystic Fibrosis but the test comes back negative, then you need to be checked for Primary Ciliary Dyskinesia (PCD). Click here to visit the PCD foundation for more information. Mild symptoms include a runny nose or a cold from the time you were born. A cough that is usually present. Multiple surgeries for insertion of tubes in the ears, hearing loss, and chronic sinus problems that result in sinus surgeries. By pre-teen years, bronchiectasis (enlargement of the airways) is usually present. Severe cases include more severe symptoms such as the organs are mirrored in the body, having more than one spleen, etc. Visit the PCD foundation for complete information.

  Chapter 1

  “Hey Austin, you coming man?” Alex asked as he stuck his head in the door of my room.

  “Yeah, I’ll be right there.” Alex was my college roommate and best friend. We were in our fourth year at UVA, but music was what we dreamed about. Alex was the lead guitarist and I was the lead singer of Shaken Thought. We sung original rock songs and had a regular gig every Friday night a Barry’s Bar. That’s where we were heading now. Grabbing my guitar, I turned the lights out and headed out the door.

  “You okay?” He looked at me from the corner of his eye.

  “Fine, why do you ask?”

  “You just seem distracted. You need to be on your A game tonight. There’s supposed to be some big wigs there tonight to watch us perform.”

  “I know that asshole. You don’t need to fucking remind me every thirty minutes.”

  “Now I know somethings up. What the hell is it?” He grabbed my shoulder but I shook him off.

  “It’s none of your fucking business so just fuck off!” I glared and then walked past him, leaving him standing there with his lips smashed together. There is no way I’m talking about my feelings with him. I only share things with my mother and since she married, I don’t do that very often.

  There is no way I could tell Alex how angry I am right now. Today is the day my dad died six years ago, and the fucker that killed him is out of jail already. He’s out of jail but I still have to live without dad because he decided to drink and drive. I think about him all the time and wonder if he thinks about dad… us. I’ve tried everything I know to get rid of the rage I feel. I work out every day, and at six-feet-two and two hundred and thirty pounds of pure muscle, the rage is still there. Mom has tried to get me to go back to counseling. It helped when dad first died so maybe I should consider it. I just don’t know.

  On stage that night with at least two hundred people drinking and dancing, I sang my heart out. I sang with every emotion I possessed.

  Do you care what you did

  The decisions you make

  It’s your selfish attitude

  It’s me who you made

  Hate that you made

  When I finished pouring my fucking heart out, the crowd went wild. Of course, they had no idea that the song was personal. Strumming the guitar, I started another song until sweat was dripping off my brow and my chest was heaving.

  Walking off stage and grabbing a bottle of water, a man in a suit walked over.

  Handing me a card, he said, “Hi Austin, I’m Eric Kincer and I work for MEC records. I would like to talk to you about maybe signing with us.” I looked down at his card and then back up to see him staring at me. I nodded to a table in the corner.

  Sitting down, “I’m listening.” He told me how he would like to manage the band, set up venues and promote us. I would have to sign a contract, agreeing to their terms. I knew this was something I needed help with, and I knew just who to call. “That sounds good, but I would like my stepfather here with me when we go over the contract.” I only called Colin my stepfather when I needed to use his name. I knew it was an asshole move, but he didn’t mind. In fact, he told me anytime I needed to use it to go ahead.

  “That’ll be fine. I’ll have the papers drawn up and we’ll meet next week to go over them.” Shaking his hand, I left to find the rest of the band.

  Finding the guys in the back room looking anxious, Alex was the first to speak when I walked in. “Well, what’d he say?”

  Taking a seat, “He said he worked for MEC records and he wants to sign us to a two year contract. Says he’ll manage and promote the band, setting up venues and so on.” The guys all shouted with happiness as I sat there grinning at them. We had worked damn hard for this and they deserved it.

  “When are you meeting him?” Alex asked.

  “I told him that I would meet him next week and I wanted my stepfather present.” Alex broke out in laughter.

  “Does he have any idea who he’s meeting with?” I smiled a mischievous smile.

  “Hell no!” I laughed. “Colin will make sure we get a good deal and not screwed.”

  “Speaking of screwed, I’m going out to mingle.” He wiggled his eyebrows and then left.

  Deciding to call mom before finding my own woman for the night, I pulled out my cell. I tried to talk to her at least two or three times a week. Dialing her number, I watched as the guys filed out one by one, looking for pussy. After a great set like tonight, we had to get rid of this pent up energy somehow.

  “Hello?’

  “Hey mom, how are you?” I asked while taking a seat on the old worn out couch.

  “I’m okay. How are you? I’ve been worried abo
ut you today.”

  “I’m okay. Actually, I’m not. I think about that man every day and I hate him. I miss dad today just as much as I did six years ago.”

  “I know honey. Even though I’m married now, Colin understands that he didn’t take Graysen’s place. I miss him to and I’ve thought about him a lot”

  “I just wish I could move forward.” I said in almost a whisper.

  “Maybe you should seek counseling again. Just remember, it’s much easier to hate someone than it is to forgive them. That’s why we have to strive to forgive.”

  “I know mom. I’m trying. On a better note, a man from MEC Records approached me tonight and wants to sign the band.”

  “That’s great sweetheart, but what about college? You’re in your last year.” I knew she’d worry about college, but I also knew she would support whatever decision I made.

  “I want to try this mom. If it doesn’t work out, I’ll only have one semester left to finish.”

  “Okay honey. All I want is for you to be happy. But if this doesn’t work out then you will finish college.”

  “Okay, deal. Now I need to talk to Colin.”

  “I’ll put him on. Bye sweetie, love you.”

  “Love you to.” I knew she’d be okay with everything. I couldn’t have asked for a better mother, and even though it was hard in the beginning, I was happy she found Colin.

  “Hey man, what’s up?” I liked that he spoke to me as another man and not a child. He’s always treated me as an equal.

  “A Mr. Kincer from MEC Records wants to sign us and he’s drawing up the contract. I would like you there just to make sure the fucker isn’t screwing us over.”

  “Okay, I’m writing this down. I’ll have James look into the company and this Mr. Kincer just to make sure he’s on the up and up. I’ll be there to go over the contract with you. Just let me know when and where.”

  “Thanks Colin.”

  “Anytime Austin.” Hanging up, I decided to find someone help get rid of all this pent up energy. Grabbing a bottle of water, I headed out to the bar, to the crowd, to the women.

  Austin’s Story

  Coming

  2016

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