by Jillian Neal
Brock grunted his annoyance, but something inside of him told him to listen.
“Just because you spent the last decade building houses don’t mean you know a damn thing about building a home, but since your sweet wife is gonna make me a great-uncle and since I do know a thing or two about raising up kids and building a home, why don’t I talk and you listen.”
“Fine. Go for it. I’m listening, but unless you have some way to make my wife like it here on the ranch, I’m not sure you can help me.”
Ev rolled his eyes. “Funny how she don’t like living inside a house that’s cold enough for us to hang meat, with a stove that don’t work, a TV that has no reception, boxes all over the damn place, other people’s shit in the cabinets and drawers, and where she can’t even have a decent cup of coffee. The fact that she let you get her pregnant is a testament to her kindness and patience and how much she clearly loves you. Your aunt would’a shot me twice, once when I was coming in and the next when I was running away.”
“We don’t have the money to fix up the cottage until I sell some cattle.”
Ev rolled his eyes. “You own half of the largest ranch in this area, Brock Camden. You got enough cattle to make a pretty profit come selling time, enough to see you through several seasons and to put some in savings. We run this ranch together. There is plenty of money in those accounts to hire you some hands so you don’t have to work your ass off constantly and to give you time and funding to fix up that house. You are currently working, son. I never intended for you to be slave labor. If I’d hired you instead of giving you your half, wouldn’t you expect regular payment? ‘Sides, you being damned and determined to do things your way and only your way reminds me of someone I don’t much care for … your daddy.”
If his uncle had backhanded him, it wouldn’t have jolted him into realization any harder than that comment had. He’d been so determined to prove that he wasn’t his old man he was acting just like him.
“So far today, Hope’s been on the receiving end of a hefty dose of humiliation at the hands of our deputy sheriff, Mindy the loudmouth, and our mailman. She and the entire rest of the town found out she was pregnant. Don’t seem to me like that was something you were expecting, so I kind of doubt she was either. I was standing at your door last night when we came to get you for the fire. I saw how terrified she was. You stuck her up in that freezing cold house and went to work, son. Don’t take a genius to figure out that she’s lost, scared, and frustrated. On top of all of that, she’s pregnant. I left all the betting to your daddy, but I think it’d be a safe wager to say suddenly figuring out that you gotta grow a baby healthy inside of ya and then raise it up once it’s outside of ya is scary as hell. Now, I know how hard this life is, and you know how hard this life is, but did it ever occur to you that you might need to help her understand this life and how hard it is?
“Killing yourself trying to do the work of ten men so you make more profit ain’t getting the message across to her that you love her and cherish her. You’re making money, but money ain’t what she’s needing. I suspect she’d far rather have her husband in her arms than a pile of cash in the bank. You need to learn that now, son. You’re still letting the fear of losing this ranch drive you. This ranch is yours. You are not your daddy, Brock. You’re not gonna gamble it away, and I’ll tell you something else. No amount of money sitting in that bank is gonna matter if you lose your wife earning it. Marriage ain’t the easiest thing in this world. It takes a whole lot of work. You both have to learn to build a life together. It takes a little finesse and a whole lotta time. You’ll get there, but you’ve got to get your priorities straight.”
“Okay, I know I screwed up. I just don’t know what to do now.”
The rhythmic click of the parking brake alerted Brock to the downed fence ahead of them. He followed Ev out of the truck and set to work clearing the snow so they could tamp new posts.
“You wanna know how to fix this, listen up,” Ev huffed. “You think about her and what might make her life a little easier. You remember that she’s gonna bring your child into this world, and that’s a gift no one else can give you. You remember that she’s scared. You tell her constantly how beautiful and how smart she is because the world don’t seem to have figured out how miraculous women are. Most men don’t ever want to see how strong they are, or how much they accomplish. ‘Spose their dicks get cramped when they begin to understand that we are woefully lost without them.”
“She is beautiful. She’s amazing,” Brock vowed adamantly. “I don’t ever want to do anything without her. I know how much stronger she is than me.”
“Don’t tell me. Tell her. Tell her you’re gonna be there when the baby’s up all night sick and crying. Tell her you’re gonna be there to hold her hand while she gives birth, and that you know she didn’t get pregnant on her own. Tell her you’re gonna change diapers, and give bottles, and teach ‘um to ride, and to help Hope with anything that comes up. Diaper rash, colic, homework, broken arms, braces, gettin’ thrown, tell her that you’re in this for the long haul. Endless amounts of snow, bulls, babies, illness, calls from the schools, wrinkles, all the tears, and all the laughter, for the weight she’s gonna insist she needs to lose that you know she doesn’t, ovens that won’t work, coffee makers that don’t make coffee, crazy-ass mailmen, busybodies that want to tell her how to exist, house repairs … life. Make sure she knows that you have no intention of leaving her in a cold house to deal with life alone, because so far that’s about all you’ve shown her you’re gonna do. And, son, if there’s something the two of you just can’t figure out, I am right here, and I’m not going anywhere. I do have a little experience with ranching and raising up youngins.”
Chapter Fourteen
“So, you’re sure it’s okay to have coffee?” Hope continued to pelt Aunt Jessie with question after question about pregnancy.
Jessie gave her a sweet grin. “Well, here’s how I figure it. We’re rancher’s wives. Our husbands get up at the ass-crack of dawn. It’s kinda nice if we get up with them. I, however, am not capable of getting up and even locating my kitchen, much less Ev’s truck without a cup of coffee or two. The baby will be fine, just don’t overdo it.”
Hope considered each part of Jessie’s advice. She’d never gotten up with Brock. She hadn’t even thought to. It would be nice to be with him in the mornings. She kept expecting him to teach her about the ranch, but that was hard to do when she was never out with him on their expansive property. Jessie’s matter-of-fact approach to life and children further restored Hope. Glancing out the windows on the kitchen door, she wondered when Brock might be back. They needed to talk. She had a lot to apologize for. He was out there in the freezing cold wind, trying to save their bull and repair yet another fence Jessie told her had come down. The regret ate at her.
“Holly, would you mind driving me out to wherever Brock is working. I just … kind of want to see him.” Hope implored.
Jessie beamed at Hope. “They’re down on the south pasture near Grant’s land. You two go check up on ‘um then head on to Saddlebacks and get us some tables. It’s getting to be dinner time. We’ll meet you there.”
Hope wasn’t anxious to leave the blazing fire in the warm farmhouse living room, but it was high time she took responsibility for her part of their current life, the one she’d been certain she couldn’t stand a few hours before, the one she’d never really given a chance.
Reminding herself that Jessie had ridden along the same bumping paths while she was pregnant and that all five of her kids were perfectly healthy, Hope told herself that the baby was fine and focused on what to say to her husband.
His head lifted when the roar of the truck motor reached his ears. She watched panic flash in his eyes. He drove one more nail through the metal fencing into the post then headed her way.
“You okay, sugar? What are you doing out here?”
“I’m okay. I feel much better, really. I wanted to see you.” She threw her
arms around him. “I’m so sorry for everything I said in the doctor’s office. I was just scared and being selfish. I don’t hate it here.”
Hope watched Ev wrap one arm around Holly as he gave Brock a broad grin.
“We have a lot we need to talk about, darlin’. I stuck you out in that cold house and didn’t teach you how to live here. This is all my fault.”
“I guess I’m still not so good at not being afraid of everything.” Admitting that out loud somehow brought her a sense of determination to control her unnecessary fears.
“Hey, life’s been rough lately. I’m scared, too.
“You are?” Hope was astonished. He knew how to do everything there. What on earth was he afraid of?
“Scared as hell, but we’re gonna get through this together. I’m gonna be there for every single thing. I promise you. Let me finish up this fence and then we’ll go get some dinner, okay? We can talk all night if we need to.”
“Aunt Jessie told us to go on to Saddlebacks.”
“Yeah, I don’t want you out in this wind. I’ll meet you there as soon as I get a shower.”
“Hope, these are my girls, Lucy Keller, Cheyenne Miller, and McKayla Harris.” Holly made introductions an hour later as they joined the ladies in the large corner booth in Saddlebacks. Holly told the bartender that her entire family would be in to eat soon.
“It’s nice to meet you.” Hope wondered when she would finally know everyone in town. They settled in. The other women had ordered platters of appetizers for their table. Hope stared longingly at the chips and dip, one of her favorites. Something she hadn’t thought to buy lately. You can’t eat other people’s food, Hope.
“Go ahead, honey. When I was pregnant with Jamie, I was starving all the time. I almost stabbed James’ hand with a fork when he tried to eat some spinach dip I wanted.” Lucy laughed.
“Lucy married James Keller last year. He’s over there playing darts. And this is baby Jamie.” Holly pointed to a tiny, sleeping infant in a car seat beside Lucy.
“He’s adorable,” Hope swooned. “How old is he?”
“Four months.” Lucy beamed down at her sleeping son. “You have any questions, you just give me a call.”
“Thanks.” Hope didn’t really know these women, but somehow she felt accepted.
“You can call any of us and ask us anything, but me, McKayla, and Cheyenne have a pact. We’re not marrying anyone from this town,” Holly vowed. “So, we might not be too much help in that department.”
“Or any surrounding town as they’re full of cowboys, too,” McKayla added vehemently.
“I never agreed to that.” Cheyenne blushed and gave Hope a very kind grin. “It just has to be the right cowboy.”
“Cheyenne’s had a thing for my big brother for years. He’s too stupid to notice,” Holly chided.
“Which one?” Hope couldn’t help but smile. Despite the freezing cold temperatures, a sudden warmth melted through a little more of the anguish she’d been carrying like a badge of honor lately.
“Grant, but please don’t tell him,” Cheyenne pled.
Hope loved the way she pronounced Grant’s name, slow and Southern with an elongated a. Cheyenne was not from Nebraska that was certain.
“Hope would never do that.” Holly vowed. Her word seemed to be good enough for the other ladies.
“I wouldn’t. I swear. Where are you from?”
“Ever heard of a little town called Electra, Texas? My family moved up here when I was in middle school. I fought hard to hang on to my accent.” She winked at Hope.
Hope nodded her understanding. “I had a crush on Brock for years, but I was terrified to tell him.”
“Really? How’d you finally work up the courage?”
“Honestly, my friends kind of pushed me into it.”
“Ooh!” Holly’s eyes sparkled in the moonlight streaming through the windows. “We should do that for you. How about if you don’t tell my big brother, who I’m telling you is gross, that you want him to bang your brains out, then I’ll tell him.” She cracked up, but Cheyenne’s mouth hung open in horror.
“You will do no such thing! I’ll run you over with my car, girl, and don’t think I won’t.”
The entire table erupted in laughter.
“And Grant is not gross.” Cheyenne added as she pulled the cherry out of her drink and popped it into her mouth when they simmered down.
Holly rolled her eyes. “Grant is gross. Not as gross as Austin, but almost. I grew up with them. I couldn’t even saddle my horse without finding Playboys hidden most everywhere in the barn. I walked in on Grant and Heidi Carlson back when they were in college. He was … ugh .. instructing her in our barn!” An involuntary shudder worked through Holly as she gagged. “That’s why I went into psychology, so I can counsel myself over that.”
Another round of laughter echoed around the table.
“Well, maybe I wouldn’t mind a few barn instructions.” Cheyenne raised her left eyebrow in challenge. She was a Southern spitfire, for sure. Hope wanted to hug her.
“Oh, my God, I’m gonna puke. Fine, go jump in Grant’s bed, just please, spare me the details.”
Lucy leaned closer to Hope. “Can I ask you something? I swear I’m not trying to embarrass you. I really want to know.”
“Uh, I guess so.” Something about the sincerity in Lucy’s plea kept her calm.
“Where did you order that lingerie from that everyone is talking about? I’m dying to get something more exciting. I don’t want the fact that we’re parents now to make us boring. We want to spice things up, but that’s not easy in this town.”
“Even if she tells you, I wouldn’t recommend having anything delivered here.” Holly shook her head.
A warm flush pooled in Hope’s cheeks, but she pressed on. “I ordered it from Hanky-Panky lingerie, but I definitely won’t be doing that again.”
“You learn to get around the occasional craziness this town offers up. They have a store in Lincoln. We’ll take a girl’s shopping trip one day,” Lucy urged.
“Really?”
“Hell yeah, honey. You’re one of us now. We won’t let you down. If anyone messes with you, I’ll back them over with my car, too.” Cheyenne winked at her.
“And if there’s anything you do want to order, have it sent to Hol’s apartment near the college. She’s our discreet deliverer,” McKayla vowed as they all helped themselves to more food.
“I was going to offer you that, when you were ready to talk about the lingerie thing. I figured the pregnancy might take precedence over that whole deal. Oh, that reminds me McK, what the hell is the Womanizer?” Holly handed McKayla a discreet white box. She quickly stuffed it in her purse.
“Fancy, schmancy new BOB. Can’t wait to try it out. BOB #1 up and died on me.”
“BOB?” Hope’s brow furrowed, and she couldn’t seem to wipe the silly grin off of her face.
“Battery operated boyfriend,” Cheyenne mouthed.
“Ah,” Hope broke out in a fit of giggles that elicited a round of laughter from her new friends.
“Nothing changes. This was the background music of my entire childhood. What are you all giggling about?” Suddenly, Austin’s low, graveled tenor broke through their laughter as he scrubbed his hand over Holly’s head. He and Grant were standing at the table. After a brief pause, this brought on uproariously abashed laughter as the women considered what they’d just been discussing. Hope searched for Brock, but didn’t see him anywhere.
“He’ll be here soon, Miss Hope. We came early to get Grant’s truck.” Austin winked at her.
Cheyenne’s olive skin didn’t conceal the blood that pooled readily in her cheeks. She couldn’t seem to take her eyes off of a slight patch of chest hair visible at the top of the button-down shirt stretched across Grant’s impressive muscles.
Grinning, Hope glanced out the window and made a wish for her new friend on one of the many twinkling stars visible that cold clear night.
“Let’s dance.” Holly bound out of their booth and all but shoved Cheyenne into Grant’s arms.
James left his dart game and offered his hand to Lucy, who was beaming at him. “Would you mind watching him?” She directed McKayla and Hope to little Jamie.
“Of course not. You go dance,” Hope insisted.
“I am not dancing with my sister.” Austin scowled at Holly.
“Uh, yes you are. You’re going to dance me over to that cute guy in a suit standing by the bar. He needs to meet me.”
Seeing couples eager to dance, the bartender switched the music on the speaker system to slow, sexy Country songs.
Hope and McKayla shared a grin as Grant wrapped his arms around Cheyenne, just a little tighter.
“I bet she’s in heaven right now,” McKayla said.
“She sure looks like she is,” Hope agreed.
“Do you think they have a chance?”
“I really don’t know. I haven’t gotten to know Grant that well.” I haven’t gotten to know anyone that well. Hope realized yet another one of her mistakes.
As the second verse began, a man with rugged good looks dressed in Wranglers, boots, and a flannel shirt approached their table. He asked McKayla to dance. She stared up at him with her mouth hanging open in shock. Hope nudged her shin under the table to get her to speak.
“Uh,” McKayla shook her head and turned to Hope.
“Go on. I’m fine.” Hope tried not to laugh at her outright. This guy was cowboy through and through, from his hat all the way to his spurs. McKayla let the man take her hand and spin her onto the dance floor.
“You, Mrs. Camden, are entirely too beautiful not to be out there on the dance floor.” Suddenly, Brock seated himself next to her. Ev and Jessie joined them at the table, grinning.
Hope threw her arms around Brock and hugged him tightly, inhaling deeply of that musk that was all her husband. “No one asked me, and I’m babysitting. Kind of thought I should get some practice.” They stared down at James and Lucy’s son.
