by Jess Bryant
She shook her head again, “Not right now. Right now, I just want to enjoy this. Enjoy you and the girls and this night with all of us together.”
He didn’t like that answer. He didn’t like that answer at all. Maybe he should have. On any other day he probably would have. He loved that she enjoyed spending time with him, just like he enjoyed spending time with her. He loved that she seemed to so easily fit into his family with his children. But everything inside of him said that she wanted to enjoy this night because she knew it was all coming to an end soon.
“Lemon….”
His doorbell ringing cut him off before he could ask her what was going on. Lemon flinched and then buried her face against his chest again. Shane frowned at the door, hating the interruption and instinctively knowing that Lemon’s reaction was a bad sign.
“I’ll get it.” Sophie offered even as Lemon muttered, “Ignore it.”
“We can’t.” He sighed when the bell rang again and all three of his daughters looked from him to the door and back again, unsure of what to do.
“Shane, just ignore it.” Lemon pleaded.
“I can’t. It could be important.” His heart sank when she winced, “Lemon, baby, who’s at the door?”
She shrugged “I don’t know and I don’t care. I just want to spend the night with you. Leave it.”
A sharp pain sliced at his chest and he shook his head, “I can’t, baby.”
The bell rang for a third time and he groaned as he went to figure out what was going on. Not a single one of his daughters moved a muscle. That feeling they’d all had tonight that something was wrong or was about to go wrong had just been proven by the ringing of that bell. Lemon stood up when he moved to the door and put her hands on her hips. She winced when he pulled it open but he had no idea why she was upset until he saw who was on the other side.
When he came face to face with Lorna Kelly, he felt like a teenager again. A kid caught doing something he shouldn’t. It was a strange reaction because he’d spoken to Lorna earlier in the day. She knew full well that he was in a relationship with her daughter. And it wasn’t as if she’d caught them half-clothed or sex-crazed. But something about the stern disapproving look on the woman’s face made him cringe.
“Evening, Mrs. Kelly.”
A pair of intensely familiar blue eyes cut to him, “Don’t you start with that Mrs. Kelly stuff now, Shane Lowry. You’ve called me Lorna for years and I think we’ve gone far past civilities since my daughter is living with you, don’t you?”
“Yes ma’am.” He nodded sheepishly when he heard Georgie’s giggling laughter in the background, “Is there something I can do for you?”
“Unfortunately, no. I just need to see my daughter. May I come in?”
He nodded and stepped aside because he had a feeling it wasn’t really a question. Lorna Kelly was on a mission. She marched past him until only the couch separated her from her daughter. And in another situation he might have smiled at the way the two of them glared at each other, smiled because Lemon looked so much like her mother, smiled because looking at Lorna made him think of what Lemon would look like in twenty or thirty more years and how much he wanted to see that.
But he couldn’t bask in that because Lemon crossed her arms over her chest defensively, “Mom? What are you doing here?”
“Catch.” Lorna threw something and Lemon shrieked but caught it as Shane stared between the two blondes, “Millie has called that thing two dozen times. It won’t stop ringing and buzzing and flashing. You forgot it at the house so I’m delivering it.”
Lemon stared at the phone in her hands with a crushed expression he didn’t understand, “I didn’t forget it. I left it because I didn’t want to talk to Millie.”
“Too bad. She called the house looking for you. I suggest you answer that the next time she calls. It sounds important.” Lorna leveled that stern look at her daughter, “You’re better than this, Lemon. You told me you were done running and hiding earlier, remember? So grow up and answer your phone. Deal with your responsibilities or you’ll never get what you want, or what you need. You’ll never really have all of this.”
Lemon’s cheeks flushed pink and her chin dropped. Shane frowned. He’d known something was wrong but this entire scene was wrong. He turned his gaze back to Lorna and she surprised him by reaching out and squeezing his arm, giving him a reassuring nod and then turning and walking away. He closed the door and took a deep breath before he turned back to face Lemon.
She was staring at the cell phone in her hand like it was a bomb. Maybe it was. Maybe it was the explosion that was going to rock their entire relationship.
Instead of asking about the phone, he focused on what he could deal with at the moment, “Girls, go upstairs please.”
“But Dad…” Rosie started to protest but he held up a hand.
“Upstairs. Now. I need to talk to Lemon alone.”
Georgie was already on her feet and Sophie was clutching her guitar and scrambling up as well. Only his youngest daughter looked ready to throw a tantrum in protest. She was the most stubborn of the three that was for sure so he was thankful when Georgie took control, grabbing the nail polish and taking the little girls hand.
“Come on, I’ll let you play with my makeup.”
“Really?” Rosie’s eyes lit up.
“Really.” Georgie shot him a look that said he’d pay for this but he only nodded and mouthed his thanks as his daughters disappeared up the stairs.
Once they were alone, he looked back at Lemon but she hadn’t budged. Her chin was still down. She was still staring at that damn cell phone. And for the first time in the lifetime that he’d known her, she looked small. Fragile. He wanted more than anything to rush over and hold her but he had a feeling that she might break if he clutched at her too hard so he only stood his ground and cleared his throat, broaching what was obvious from what Lorna had said.
“So… you were talking to your mom earlier? That’s why you were late for dinner?”
Lemon nodded.
“You told her… about everything? Your situation? The baby?”
Lemon nodded again but she chewed her lip and avoided his gaze.
He moved back towards her, “I’m proud of you.”
“Don’t be.” She snorted, “I’m still running.”
“You’re not.” He reached her and pulled her into his arms gently, “You’re not running. You’re not a runner, Lemon. You were scared and you came home. Everyone gets scared sometimes. Everyone wants the comfort of home when things get bad. That’s not running away. That’s just life.”
She hugged him tight, burying her face against his chest and he stroked her back reassuringly. She was shivering and he hated that she was upset. She’d come clean, finally. She’d told her parents about her past, about her problems and her situation. But she should have told him that she’d done it so he could comfort her like he was now.
Instead she’d tried to smile and put on the happy face that she did for the rest of the world. Only he wasn’t a fan or a stranger. He was the man that loved her.
“You’re so strong, baby. So strong. But you don’t have to carry all of this alone anymore. Your parents and your sister are here for you. I’m here for you.”
“Shane…” Her voice broke on his name and he kissed the top of her head.
“I’m here, Lemon. I’ve got you. I promise.”
“I told my family about Alec, about the baby I lost, about the surgery the doctors want to do and it… it makes it seem so much more real and scary.”
He stroked her back at that admission, “I know it’s scary but you’re not alone anymore.”
“I still don’t know what I’m going to do. I know what I should do but… it just feels so final.”
“You don’t have to decide anything right now.”
“I wish that was true.” Lemon clutched at his back but she flinched when the phone in her hand started ringing.
Shane sighed when she
made no move to release him, “Answer the phone, baby.”
“I don’t want to.”
And he knew then what the phone calls meant. The phone was the source of his bad feeling. It was the reason she was pulling away from him. Not because she’d told her parents the truth and was hurting for her past. Because she was scared of the future and what it would mean for them if she picked up that phone.
Damn it, he’d thought they had more time.
That was her real life calling. The life that she’d had before him. The life he’d always known she would have to go back to, eventually. But he wasn’t about to bow out or let her go easily. He was part of her life now. She was part of his. And whatever was going on in that other part of her life, they would figure out a way to deal with it together.
He released her and held her at arm’s length, “Lemon, you’re not a coward. Pick up your phone. Whatever is on the other end, whatever is going on, we’ll handle it.”
She shuddered out a breath, “Promise?”
“Promise. Pick it up baby. It’s not gonna change anything.”
Her blue eyes studied his face for a long second and he held himself steady and let her look. He was solid. He didn’t falter and he wouldn’t. Not with her. Her eyes softened and her bottom lip trembled but she gave a slight nod before she lifted the phone, punched a button and put it to her ear.
“Hey Millie. What’s up?”
“What’s up?” A squeaky female voice echoed through the line and made them both wince, “I’ve been trying to reach you all day! That’s what’s up!”
“Sorry, I must’ve misplaced my phone. Did you need me for something?”
He would have laughed at the feigned cheerfulness in Lemon’s voice in another situation. In this one, all he wanted was to reach out and pull her into his arms. He wanted her to drop the mask that had covered her features as soon as she answered the phone. He wanted his Lemon back but instead he had to watch, and listen, as the woman he loved slipped deeper inside of herself and behind her walls.
The woman on the other end of the phone was her assistant. She’d told him that much. Millie ran her life according to Lemon. The girl was young but she had a spine made of steel and obsessive compulsive organizational skills. If she was calling, it meant that there was something in Lemon’s life in Nashville she hadn’t been able to handle on her own.
Lemon turned away from him as her face fell, “I thought you handled this already? I told you I didn’t want to go. No. No. I understand that we RSVP’d but isn’t that kind of the point of being a VIP? I can cancel if I want?”
He winced as he watched Lemon pace around his living room. He couldn’t hear the woman on the other end of the phone anymore. She’d lowered her voice after her first shrieking freak out so all he could make out of the conversation now was Lemon’s side of things. And it was clear to him that she wasn’t happy with the phone call, with her assistant, or with this situation.
“I know Trent wants me there but…” Lemon shot him a look over her shoulder and he tried to smile but she looked away just as quickly. “I can’t do that anymore, Mills. I’ll talk to Trent. I’ll explain it but I can’t do it right now.”
Shane frowned at her back as he tried to place that name. Trent. It wasn’t one he’d heard her mention before. She’d told him a lot about her life in the past few weeks. She’d talked to him about Millie, her assistant, and about Thad, her bodyguard. She’d told him about her producer, Paul, and about her writing partner, Whitney. But he couldn’t remember her ever mentioning anyone named Trent and the shot of jealousy that hit his bloodstream surprised him.
He’d never been a jealous man. Never. Plenty of his friends had commented on Holly’s looks when they were together. He’d seen other men hit on her when they went out but he’d always laughed it off. When she’d gotten together with Brad immediately following their divorce, he’d shrugged it off.
But just the sound of another man’s name on Lemon’s lips made him want to punch something.
“I’ll talk to him.” She was saying now. “No. I know. I know there’s not time to… Millie, please. Figure a way out of this. That’s what I pay you for. I’m not ready to come back to Nashville yet. I need more time.”
Shane’s stomach dropped out and his knees felt unsteady. He sat down on the edge of the couch and dropped his head into his hands. Shit. Shit. He’d known, somewhere in the back of his mind he’d known that this was coming. This was the reason for the call. There was something in Nashville that required more than just Lemon’s attention. It required her presence.
She was leaving.
Damn it, he’d known from the start that she would have to go back eventually. He’d known it was coming and he still wasn’t ready. He wasn’t sure he would ever be ready. He hated the idea of letting her go, of letting her out of his sight. He wanted her here, with him, but he’d known that he couldn’t keep her hidden away here forever.
She was bigger than him. Bigger than his life. Bigger than this town. And what did he have to give her that could compete with her big, fancy, celebrity life in Nashville?
“Okay. Okay, fine. Fine! I said fine, Millie!” Lemon’s voice rose enough to cut into the fog of his thoughts, “I’ll talk to you in the morning. Yeah, okay, bye.”
Silence permeated the living room and the heaviness of it clogged his lungs. Lemon was never quiet. She was always jabbering about something or other. They were always teasing each other or flirting with each other. But Lemon was quiet and he had a horrible premonition that this was what his life was going to be like without her.
Quiet. Boring. Bland. Awful. Without Lemon his life would go back to the same dull, monotonous cycle it had been in before she showed up. Before she jolted him back to life and helped him start living again.
He couldn’t go back to that. He couldn’t. He wouldn’t.
What did he have to offer her to compete with that celebrity life in Nashville? Everything. Everything she said she wanted. A home and a family and the safety and security of the place where she’d grown up. He had himself and the kids. He had his heart and it was all hers if she wanted it.
All of him.
“When are you leaving?” He glanced up to find Lemon staring at him with the saddest blue eyes in the entire world.
She swallowed hard and her voice was rough when she spoke, “Tomorrow.”
He felt that one word like a punch to the gut. Tomorrow. It was too soon. But any day would have been too soon to say goodbye to her.
“They’re sending a plane for me in the morning. I…” She cleared her throat again, “I don’t want to go, Shane. I don’t have a choice.”
“I understand.”
“It’s an event I thought I could get out of but I can’t. An awards show I RSVP’d to months ago. I’m not performing so I thought I didn’t have to go but…”
“You have responsibilities. I understand.” He forced the words out.
“It’s not running, right? That’s what you said. I’m not running back there. I don’t want to go. I just…”
“Your life is there. I get it.”
“Shane?” Her voice was wobbly and he rubbed his eyes because they felt like they were burning.
“What?”
“Will you… why won’t you look at me?”
The knot in his throat was hard to swallow past, “Because I don’t want it to be the last time I see you.”
“Oh, God, no…”
Lemon’s voice broke on a sob and that got his attention. He glanced up and saw tears streaming down her pretty face and it broke him. He was on his feet instantly and in two strides he had her in his arms. He felt tears in his own eyes when she gulped a gigantic sob and clung to him tightly. He held her close and tried to force air back into his lungs, thoughts back into his head.
This wasn’t the end.
“I don’t want to go.” Lemon sniffed into his shirt.
“But you have to.”
“Yeah.” She answere
d even though it hadn’t been a question.
“Will you come back?”
Lemon pulled back enough to look up at him, “What?”
Was that hope in her eyes? He prayed that it was. Hoped that she wanted the same things he did. Because he was about to ask her for the world and all he could hope was that what he had to offer in return was enough.
“Will you come back? After your event? After you’re done with whatever it is you have to do in Nashville, will you come back to Fate? Will you come back to me?”
Her bottom lip trembled, “Do… do you want me to come back?”
“God, yes. I don’t want you to leave at all. Ever. I want you to stay right here with me in this house and build a life with me, Lemon.”
Another tear slipped down her cheek and he swiped it away gently when she nodded, “Then yes. Yes, I’ll come back. I want that too.”
Hope flared in his chest. Warmth. But it was something more than that. More than just familiarity and attraction. He’d known it for a while now. Even if it was fast and crazy and out of control.
He loved her so damn much.
“You don’t have to choose.” He met her gaze and watched her brows furrow, “You don’t have to pick between Fate and Nashville. You don’t have to choose between me and your music. You do whatever you have to do and I’ll be right here waiting for you, baby. Just promise you’ll come back to me.”
Lemon tilted her head, “Do you mean that?”
“Of course I do. I’m all in here, Lemon. I want you and if I have to share you with the world, I’ll learn how to deal with it as long as you come home to me.”
“Home.” A flicker of a smile tilted just the corner of her lips.
“Yeah, home.” He brushed her hair back softly, “This is your home. This is where you belong. With me.”
“Shane…” She cuddled into his touch, “These past few weeks have been the happiest I’ve had in a really long time.”
“We can have more of them, babe.”
“I… I don’t know if…”
“Shhh.” He cut her off with a soft kiss, “We don’t have to figure out all of the details tonight. We have the rest of our lives to do that just so long as you come back to me.”
