Dragonflies The Duncan Peters Files

by Fontien, Samantha

  When Duncan walked back to Simone’s room, he was virtually walking on air. He stopped at the door, looking at his wonderful wife. He was in awe of her; she looked amazing, as she slept peacefully. It was impossible for him to love her any more than he did. She stirred, catching him looking at her. She immediately sat upright, alarmed at him standing there.

  “Oh my God, what’s wrong? Is Isabella okay?” There was a look of pure horror on her face.

  Duncan walked towards her, realising how it must have looked, him standing there, that and the accompanied look.

  “No, no, sorry darling,” he rushed to the bed. “I’m sorry; I didn’t mean to frighten you. Sorry darling,” he leaned in to kiss her, “I was just simply looking at my amazing wife.” He kissed her tenderly. “Yes, before you ask, yes, I have called your parents. They are coming up today. And yes, before you ask, yes, I have just come from the SCBU, and Oh my God, you do make beautiful babies Mrs. Peters.” He laughed having pre-empted every one of her questions.

  That week was a whirlwind of trips to the hospital, fetching and carrying stuff to and fro. Rubin was brilliant at helping him prepare the nursery, he even helped assemble Isabella’s cot. Both he and Rubin worked hard on getting the room ready. They had everything, they were well prepared, they just hadn’t figured on Isabella arriving so early. But never the less, on the Sunday, they brought Isabella home. Rubin had even put up banner for her, in fact he had gone to town on the amount of assorted pink helium filled balloons, and oversized cuddly toys he had also bought for her. Duncan smiled to himself, little madam had another hard and crunchy male to look after her as he caught Rubin cooing to her that him and daddy were actually serious when they say ‘they are going to kill all the boys that tried to break her heart.’

  Isabella was the perfect baby in every way. She was a good eater and sleeper, and hardly ever cried. She was everybody’s girl, Daddy’s, Mummy’s, Grandpa’s, and Grandma’s and Uncle Rube’s little princess. Life was perfect.

  Duncan did more than his fair share of feeds too, night or day. In fact he never had to be asked. He doted on Isabella, and she had to be called Isabella, and not have her name shortened, As far as he was concerned she too was going to Cambridge. Nothing was impossible for his daughter. He was truly in love with his little girl who was a very smiley baby. She was always laughing and babbling to herself.

  Having a baby in the house was great. It made everything complete. He knew doing another tour now, would be harder than normal. It was unbearable to leave Simone; he hated the idea of leaving both of them at home. If he had to be honest, he was dreading it. But he knew he wouldn’t have to think about it till the New Year. So Duncan made best of every moment with Isabella. Their first Christmas was one they would always remember. Of course he had overindulged his Isabella. It was her first Christmas, and maybe the rocking horse was a bit much, but his excuse was she would grow into it. He had become a master at feeding her; his speciality was catching bowls before they hit the floor. Yes he was going to make up for the months he would miss out on when he did his next tour, which was rapidly approaching in April.

  On 20th March 1996, she was a bit fussier than normal. After a few hours of crying which they put down to teething, she finally fell asleep shortly before 2 am. Simone and Duncan slept hard that night, after taking it in turns for the last few nights. They we’re just ten feet away, Duncan woke up around 8 am startled because they actually had slept through the night after weeks of sleep interruption. He went over to her crib expecting to see a smiling Isabella beaming up at him; he leaned in, wondering why she was so quiet. Isabella was on her stomach snuggled in the corner.

  Instinct told him, something was very wrong. He leaned in to touch her, Duncan’s stomach hit to the ground. He felt sick. Isabella, felt hard and cold, like a plastic baby doll. Instinct and pure utter panic hit him, as he tried a version of CPR, her face softened and color seemed to begin to return to normal. He called out to Simone to ‘call an ambulance’ as Isabella wasn’t breathing. He was still performing CPR on Isabella when Simone came rushing into the room with the phone in her hand. She screamed and dropped to her knees where Duncan and Isabella were, while Duncan ordered her to call ‘999’. Panic overtook her as she cried into the phone in hysterics’ wailing for them to please come and save her baby. All the while Duncan prayed silently for God to allow his Isabella to live, and at that point he didn't care if she'd have been left with severe brain damage, he just wanted Isabella. It was a terrible, cruel few minutes where time seemed to come a stop and the entire universe froze except in that one room, in ‘Isabella’s nursery.’

  He was fairly certain that the paramedics arrived quickly. They exchanged looks as they entered, and took over from Duncan. They worked on Isabella for quite a few minutes, before they told them the dreaded news ‘that it was too late and there was nothing they could do.’ The police arrived soon after that. The Paramedics left Isabella on the floor, a tiny bundle covered with a little blanket they had taken from her crib. He stood there glued to the spot where he had stood since they took over, holding Simone, who was inconsolable and instantaneously fell to her knees when they told them Isabella was gone. As they left the room, one of the paramedic’s placed their hand on Duncan’s shoulder, as a gesture of support, telling him, he did everything he could; it was a perfect execution of textbook resuscitation on an infant. Simone started wailing “they left my Isabella on the floor.”

  Duncan went to move her and put her back into her cot; he wasn’t leaving her there like that. But the police said she had to stay there, until they had investigated and the coroner came to perform his duties.

  Everything was a blur, people came and went. At some point Rubin arrived in the commotion. Duncan was numb with the ache he felt. He was more than just dazed and confused. Simone’s mum and dad arrived and had ushered her to bed, having called the local doctor to sedate her, leaving Duncan and Rubin alone sitting in the living room.

  Rubin walked over to the drinks table, and poured two glasses of scotch, he returned to Duncan who just sat there staring blankly. He handed him a glass which Duncan had swallowed in one gulp. He handed him the other glass, which Duncan knocked back also. It was only then, a tear fell from Duncan’s eye.

  “I don’t understand it Rube’s,” he shook his head in dismay. “I fed her at around two o clock this morning. She was fine, she fell asleep in my arms.” He wiped the tears, which were now popping out of his eyes with the palm of his hand. “I just don’t understand it. How, why?” And his shoulders gave way, as he cried, choking on the tears that had overwhelmed him. “It’s been such a fantastic eight months, and we were so happy. You just don’t think that you are going to go to bed ‘thinking everything’s fine’ and then you wake up in the morning and it’s not fine at all.” He shook his head in dismay. “It’s a fucking horrible nightmare that seems never ending.” And he sobbed and sobbed.

  *****

  Rubin leaned in feeling quite helpless; all he could do was wrap his arms around his sobbing friend trying to console this big hard army brother. He slapped Duncan’s back hard, choking on his own emotions, yet he couldn’t utter any words. They choked him. He had to be strong for his friend. He hadn’t the foggiest idea what to say or to do. Inside he was crying like Duncan. Their little princess was gone. Taken from them, and it hurt like nothing he had ever known before. But he had to be strong for Duncan. Several times he had to leave the room, as he didn’t want to cry in front of him. If he felt like this, he could only imagine what Simone and Duncan were going through right now. It was unthinkable; mind you it was unthinkable to think that little Isabella was gone. He plied Duncan with scotch. It was numbing his pain, and no doubt having the same effect on his friend. The paramedics and coroner had told them that it was probably Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS) or otherwise known as ‘Cot Death’ but they would need to perform an autopsy.

  Rubin took charge of everything; Poor Simone and Duncan were in no fit state
to do anything, as they went through the motions of functioning in a bubble of disbelief. He even called Jessica, to tell her of the terrible news. He drove Simone and Duncan to the hospital, the next day.

  The autopsy showed Isabella, had died of SIDS. They had heard of it briefly before, but really didn't know much about it. They had been given a detailed fact sheet from the medical examiner’s office, and that was their introduction to the facts of SIDS.

  The funeral and everything happened so very quickly. Isabella was found at 8:00 am on a Sunday morning. They did the autopsy the next day and the body was released that night, He and Duncan made the burial arrangements. It was all so strange, leaving a baby in the funeral home that night, she needed a blanket to keep her warm, someone to watch her, you just didn't leave a baby alone . . . So after Rubin drove Duncan home, he went back to the funeral home and every night he stayed with his Isabella, so she wasn’t alone.

  He never told Duncan…

  Over those nights he wondered how Simone and Duncan would ever recover from this. He was very worried about Duncan and rightly so. He seemed to have fallen into a black hole, and he looked like he wouldn’t be returning anytime soon…

  11..

  Vicious..

  1995 was, as I said eventful for Rubin. Christmas day had been a hoot as far as he was concerned when Simone and Duncan came round to announce their news. But the reality of that night was the destruction of his and Jess’s relationship. It didn’t happen that night. It was more of a slow boil. He should have seen it coming really, but he liked Jess and the dysfunctional thing they had. It suited him perfectly. She was the perfect woman for him. He had very strong feelings for her. He thought back to that night, and what had happened when they had got home.

  During the short walk home, Rubin had been wondering what he had in his refrigerator. It wasn’t that he was hungry with the fill he had in his stomach from Simone’s hearty feast. No, he was thinking more of using the can of whipped cream, actually if he remembered correctly, he had two cans. As he was putting the key in the door, he was thinking of where he would start first. As he bound into the kitchen, towards the refrigerator, he could hear Jess’s heels, making their way up stairs. He smiled to himself, as he had remembered what she had whispered to him, as her hand fondled him firmly under the tablecloth. He felt the familiar stir in his loins, just the thought of that naughty minx make his cock hard. Mind you, it didn’t take much.

  By the time he had got to his bedroom, Jess was sitting on the edge of the bed her legs spread, dressed in a saucy black and red Basque a tiny string thong and black lace stockings. He paused at the door, before walking to meet her as she rose from the bed and walked towards him.

  “What’s the cream for?” she purred as she licked his neck slowly to his chin.

  “Well, I thought Kitty would like some cream” he smiled as his tongue met hers.

  “Uhh uh no way,” she backed away slowly, teasing him. She ran her finger across the top of the Basque she was wearing. “Do you know how much this cost?” She gave him a devilish smile.

  “Well that’s a shame, because you know I’m going to rip it off you” he smiled knowingly as he walked towards her shaking the can of cream.

  That was one of many fun nights he had with Jess, and not just because she had put her foot splendidly in it with the threesome conversation she had shouted down the stairs. And she had kept her word about that too. New Year’s Eve he woke up to two air-hostesses in his bed that morning, and one of them had been Jess. He liked the fact she had a ‘very open mind’ when it came to sex.

  As I said, it was a slow burner. It really started or kicked up a gear when Simone and Duncan got married that it sort of went into overdrive. He understood that it must be hard to see your kid sister marry. They had started out as a casual thing, which suited him perfectly. He was attracted, no drawn to her with the confidence she had emitted. It was also the fact that she was a grade ‘A’ beauty, a perfect ten as he would call it. He had a scoring system, as he liked to call it. And her score was out of the park. She was as reckless as he. She was out for fun, and she certainly was fun. He found nights rolled into days with her. Her company was easy going, and she had a great sexual appetite and was very willing to try new things. She wasn’t much of a homemaker unlike her sister. Jess’s idea of doing dinner was ordering a takeout and he was cool with that, her talents lay elsewhere.

  Another good thing about her was the fact she travelled a lot, which meant they weren’t under each other’s feet. Believe it or not, it just worked. But things just changed that day at the registry office. He had overheard Jessica giving a blasé comment to Simone about ‘whether she thought Duncan was only marrying her as she was pregnant.’ He thought that was somewhat out of order, even for a sister to joke about on her wedding day. It was only a simple ceremony. He stood for Duncan of course. Jess was bridesmaid and the girl’s parents and some of their aunties and uncles were amongst the handful of people attending the service and the wedding meal, which was at a small Italian restaurant Duncan used to take Simone to. It was a lovely simple day. He remembered looking at Duncan in his new suit, and Simone, in her beautiful but simple wedding dress. They looked so happy; as they kissed he smiled to himself, knowing his friend was happy. Simone was the best thing that had happened to Duncan in a long time. Juliette had somewhat semi destroyed Duncan, with her actions, and how she had dealt with him. He never liked her; he only tolerated her for Duncan’s sake. Simone however was very different. She had a lovely, no a beautiful gentle quality to her. He had all the time in the world for her. And that wasn’t because he was banging her sister.

  That night when they got home, he called Jess out on what she had said to Simone. She had already undressed and was laying naked as the day she was born, on her stomach, legs dangling above her derriere, waiting for Rubin. He had deliberately taken his time in undressing himself, knowing full well that talking would be the last thing they would be doing. When he asked Jess if she thought ‘Duncan had only married Simone because of the baby?’ He was surprised at her honesty; mind you it was another quality he liked about her. But he felt it was his duty to put her straight.

  “Listen pet, you’re wrong if you think Dunc only asked her to marry her because of the baby. He’s had that ring burning a hole in his pocket for the last few days, and that’s no lie, and I know that because I helped him pick out the bloody thing.”

  As Simone’s belly grew, Jess’s need for commitment became more apparent. Obviously her biological clock was ticking, and he understood that. She had started dropping hints about her not being able to 'do this gig forever'. Long haul flights apparently became a thing of the past for ladies over a certain age, and then they take the shorter flights, losing the exclusivity of first class and finding themselves fading into the shadows. Jess talked of 'her friends' who had met their husbands on these fights, and were all too happy to give up their wings for the businessmen, in return for a life of luxury. 'And she Jessica Ann Morris was never going to fade into obscurity.’

  That night he absolutely agreed that she, Jessica, could, and never would fade into the obscurity, whoever she settled with or what she did with her life.

  One thing about Rubin was that he was very honest, he may have been a bit of a cad, but he certainly was no liar. He never made promises he couldn’t keep, nor say something he didn’t mean. He never used the ‘love’ word; he worded very carefully what he said, so that there never were any misunderstandings. He was straight up with everyone; he couldn’t offer the commitment they would need. He was a free spirit, an untamed animal, and he was going to stay that way.

  Things unfortunately came to a head two months before Isabella was born.

  They had attended one of Rubin’s circles parties. It was in a grand house, actually it was more like a ball for fellow ‘kinksters’, people who were like minded like him. They had attended parties like this before, but he had never brought her to one of this scale. They had drawn up
in Betsy, which, was driven away by one of the valet attendants as they ascended the red carpeted grand external staircase of the seventeenth century mansion house on the grand private estate in the Surrey country side.

  Both he and Jess adorned their gold eye masks just before they handed their invitations to the costumed door man in seventeenth century garb, complete with white powdered wig, and fake beauty spot in the shape of a heart. He beckoned to the two big burly security men to open the door, with a swish of the crystal toped cane he held in his hand. And the door was opened to the sound of ‘Tori Amos - Professional widow” was banging out over the music system, in the ballroom. He took her hand and led her into the marbled hall. He watched her look at the various sights to be seen of people becoming a lot friendlier as he led her into the hustle and bustle of the grand ball room. He watched her smile; she must have been quite relived to see that it wasn’t completely the orgy feast she must have imagined.

  They had been dancing, when they were first approached by a couple, who too were masked, with the offer of their company up in one of the bedrooms upstairs. He wanted to watch them with his wife. Jessica whispered into Rubin’s ear after they had left;

  “She didn’t have any boobs and I know you’re a tit man. I know you have no problems being watched.” She laughed as she danced closer teasing him.