Chaste

by Lydia Michaels

  “I know you’re sweet and funny and as much as those bunnies make you crazy you’d never aim your gun at them. I’m also willing to bet when it comes to shootin’ you’d give Annie Oakley a run for her money. I know you drink diet cola because you like the flavor, not because you worry about your figure. And I know the idea of another man touching you is abhorrent. You see, love, there’s lots I still don’t know about you, but I’m bettin’ it’ll be pretty fun learning. I’m just not sure you’d be able to put up with a lifetime of me.”

  Her heart was pounding hard in her chest and she was shaking. Hope, fear, anxiety, and excitement beat at her. She’d been in love with this man since he was fourteen. She knew he was kind and gentle and funny and probably the most beautiful image of man God had ever created. Nearly choking on the words, praying she wasn’t so gullible that he could actually tease her in such a way, she wheezed, “Are you serious?”

  He took her fingers and squeezed. “Who will want me when my looks fade and my body ages? I know you like the way I look as much as I like the way you look. Hell, you’re the sexiest woman I’ve ever kissed. But you see more of me, Ashlynn. You care what I have to say, what I think. You don’t fall for the act, and push me to be a better man. You have faith I am better. You’re different. No one’s ever seen me the way you do, unless I’m totally misreading things, but I’m pretty sure I’m not. Since getting to know you I’ve seen my brothers differently. I find myself envying Finn and Mallory’s happiness and wanting what Colin and Sammy share. I never realized how lonely I was until I considered my life without you.”

  It was too much. Her brain focused on the logical, steering clear of the emotional havoc he’d unleashed on her heart. “Where would we live?”

  And that was when he said the magic words. “I’ll go wherever you go. Wherever you live, I’ll live.”

  Goosebumps covered her arms. “That’s a line from the bible.”

  “The Book of Ruth, I believe.” He smiled cheekily. “There’s a redeemable Catholic somewhere inside this heathen.”

  She grinned. “If you’re serious…” He couldn’t be. She’d wake up at any moment.

  “I am.”

  She couldn’t breathe. Something would interfere at any second and reality would return. What game was this? She needed to push hard enough so it would stop. Assuming he was serious, they’d have to address certain measures. Maybe if she brought them up he’d balk and knock it off. “You’d have to ask my father.”

  “Will he shoot at me?”

  “Only a little, but he’s never been as good as me with a rifle.”

  He nodded. “I’ll ask him.”

  Her entire body froze. Was this happening? She called his bluff again. “And you’ll have to go to church. I won’t have a sinner for a husband.”

  He grinned wickedly. “That’s what confession’s for, love. Once I get to wife you up, I plan on doing a whole lot of sinning in our marriage bed.”

  Heat washed over her shoulders and crept up her face. She laughed. Some ridiculously fanciful part of her grabbed on and skepticism surrendered to naivety. It was just easier to believe they could work. “That’s the beauty of it, Kelly. If we’re wed, there’s no sin.”

  He groaned. “So should we go to Vegas tonight?”

  It was all banter in good fun. She played along, because she no longer possessed the strength to be the level headed one. “No. I’ll be expecting a traditional wedding where my daddy walks me down the aisle.”

  “How long does that take to plan?”

  Long enough for the joke to stop being funny. Long enough for you to come to your senses. Long enough for you to abandon me again, once and for all. She shrugged. “I have no idea. I’m the least girlie girl in Center County.”

  “Can I kiss you now?”

  Actions were so much more serious than words. She sobered. No matter that he was toying with her, she wanted to believe it was true. Just a few more minutes of make believe and she’d walk away to lick her wounds in private. How far would he go with this ruse?

  It was all subterfuge, but it seemed necessary to hold back the pain. Just a few more minutes of postponing the inevitable. One last kiss. In a rough voice, she whispered, “You better.”

  He stood so fast his chair tipped to the floor and she flinched. Rounding the table, a predator with his eye on his prey, he closed in on her. She giggled, perhaps out of apprehension and trepidation, as he scooped her into his arms and plopped her on the table.

  His eyes met hers and he smiled. “You smell like the earth and sweat. I love it.”

  She stilled, the joke no longer funny. It was a very small, but crucial detail. All jokes aside, there was something different in his demeanor, something pained and almost desperate. She loved Kelly, but did he love her?

  “Kelly—”

  “Marry me, Ashlynn. I’ll learn to be the husband you deserve.”

  He appeared so resolute, so serious. Her heart swelled with so much hope and groundless optimism her shoulders ached. “Okay.”

  His lips brushed hers and her lashes lowered. Everything was numb. Each touch seemed more a hallucination than actuality. What if he actually married her? Could she marry a man who wasn’t in love with her? Would that be what eventually happened to her anyway? Perhaps she loved him enough for both of them.

  As his lips pressed to hers and her toes curled inside her boots, she decided they’d work out the details later. For now she wanted the fantasy.

  Chapter Ten

  As Ashlynn drove them to her father’s house, Kelly was impressed with how calm he was. She’d sputtered when he’d asked her to take him there. Did she think he was joking? She seemed stuck in a daze ever since, her pale little brow creasing with confusion above those sexy glasses.

  He’d never expected to see Ashlynn, let alone propose marriage. The words sort of slipped out, but once they were out he wanted to hear what she’d say. More than anything in the world he wanted to hear her say yes.

  The way she looked at him was different from every other woman who saw him. No one saw him the way Ashlynn did. Women had called him many flattering things, but none had to do with the true fiber of who he was. It all had to do with what he could make them feel or how he’d managed to make them purr. Looking back on it all, it was cheap. But the way Ashlynn watched him, she saw value inside of him somewhere no one else dared to look.

  She honestly believed he was redeemable and good, so much so, her patience and conviction was starting to convince him he wasn’t a lost cause. For whatever reason she found value in him, it told him he could do this. It wouldn’t be easy and he was bound to screw up—a lot—but he could do it if she never lost that faith in him. If there was one thing he knew about Ashlynn, it was that she was a woman who diligently committed herself to the things she had faith in. Such devotion had never been offered to him before.

  Staying away from her had been torture. He didn’t want his presence to provoke any bad memories of the episode with Evan or so he told himself. Their entire time apart had been wrapped up in a mental debate where he called himself a spineless puss and a second later promised he’d made the right choice by backing off. His head had been a mess, but through it all his desire for this woman never wavered. As a matter of fact, it grew.

  His fantasies of Ashlynn naked morphed into fantasies of simply hearing her voice, knowing what was on her mind, seeing her smile. His curiosity about how she was spending her days ate at him morning, noon, and night. He’d kept away because he knew he wanted to sleep with her—of course he did—but after a while he just wanted to talk to her. Now he’d have her forever, always there to chat with and hold close. Soon enough the sex would come too and he had no doubt that would be incredible.

  With every passing minute a new level of calm settled over him. This was a good choice. His decision, once stated, became an irrefutable truth.

  As they turned onto the Fisher property he considered his own family. They’d think he’d lost his min
d, which was a big possibility. He should probably be preparing what he was going to say to Ashlynn’s father, but he was surprisingly at ease.

  His fiancée turned the truck and her childhood home came into view. It was another colonial, simple like Ashlynn’s. Although it was dark out, he could tell it was a nice, sturdy house. His future father-in-law was simple country folk and he liked that. His mum would like that.

  As she parked the truck her fingers tightly gripped the steering wheel.

  “You okay, Ash?”

  She nodded, but looked a little pale. “Just a little nervous. If this is a prank, now’s the time to tell me.”

  He frowned and opened the door. “Come on.”

  Her show of nervousness disrupted his calm. “He’s not really going to shoot me, right?”

  She gave an unfinished laugh, her mouth lifting only into the slightest smile. “I don’t know. I’ve never done this before.”

  Figuring he better start applying his chivalrous skills, he climbed out of the truck and went to get her door. Ashlynn jumped down and he gripped her elbow. “Hey, it’ll be all right. This is a good thing,” he reminded her, hoping he’d told the truth.

  He followed her up the steps. She knocked twice as she pushed open the door. “Daddy?”

  “Sug?” A man called from somewhere in the house. “I thought you weren’t coming when I didn’t hear from you. I’ll get the cards.”

  Kelly followed her into the den where some lamps were lit. Her father lifted himself out of an Eazy Boy chair. “Daddy, I brought someone to meet you.”

  Roy Fisher stilled and eyed Kelly, rising to his full height and narrowing his gaze. Ashlynn’s father was a lean man, still in good shape. He tugged on his flannel shirt and held out his hand. “Roy Fisher. I’m Ashlynn’s father. And you are?”

  Kelly took the man’s hand and shook. “Nice to meet you, sir. I’m Kelly McCullough.”

  Roy frowned. “Kelly? Now, I know your parents, know your brother, Colin, and your sister, Katherine, but I’m afraid I don’t know you, son.”

  “Kelly graduated with me, Daddy.” Ashlynn stood, posture anxious, hands wringing at her waist.

  Roy nodded. “Nice to meet you, Kelly. Why don’t we have a seat? What are you kids up to?”

  Kelly followed Ashlynn to the couch and sat.

  “Lynn, honey, why don’t you see if there’s some sweet tea in the fridge?” Roy said, and Ashlynn gave Kelly a nervous look.

  He nodded. He wasn’t afraid of her father.

  When Ashlynn left, Roy’s eyes narrowed again. “I can’t say I know you, Kelly, but I know of you. Mind telling me what you’re doing with my daughter?”

  Kelly stiffened. Maybe he was a little nervous. “Ashlynn and I have been friends for quite some time.”

  “How long?”

  “A few months.”

  “Define friends.”

  Okay, this wasn’t going as he’d expected. Maybe he should go give her a hand with the tea. “We dated for a bit.”

  Roy’s jaw twitched. “My daughter’s a good girl, Kelly. I’d hate to pass judgment before I know a person, but your reputation precedes you. Are you dating my daughter now?”

  Ashlynn rushed back in and Kelly noted the hurried way she carried the drinks. “Here you go, Daddy. So what have you two been chatting about?”

  Kelly narrowed his eyes and sipped his tea. Damn! This family had the best iced tea.

  “Kelly, here, was telling me that you two dated. I wasn’t aware.”

  Ashlynn blushed. “Oh, well, we, um, yes.”

  Roy frowned. “Are you two a couple now?”

  Kelly took her hand and squeezed. Her palms were sweating. “Yes,” he said, meeting the other man’s gaze. “That’s actually why we’re here.”

  Roy’s brow lifted. “Go on.”

  Kelly swallowed and cleared his throat. “I’ve asked Ashlynn to marry me.”

  All traces of friendliness vanished from the other man’s face. In a gruff voice, he said, “Ashlynn, get my gun.”

  She laughed nervously. “Daddy—”

  He turned to his daughter and scowled. “You cannot marry this man. He’s a scoundrel. Everyone knows it. He owns a bar and doesn’t go to church and—”

  Ashlynn’s lips thinned as her shoulders lifted. “Daddy!” she hissed.

  Kelly cleared his throat. “With all due respect, sir, stepping into a church doesn’t make a man Christian any more than standing in a garage makes him a car. I was born Catholic and my parents raised me so. I do own a bar, and because I own my own business, the hours aren’t always agreeable with Sunday morning mass, but it’s something I’d be willing to work on…for Ashlynn.”

  Roy held up his hands and shook his head. “I’m sorry, the answer is no.”

  “Sir, I care for your daughter very much.”

  Roy turned his glare on Kelly. “Do you think I’m a fool, boy? I know what you’re after. Ashlynn’s too smart for this.” He turned back to his daughter and said, “Sugar bear, you have to see through this scheme.”

  Kelly saw tears shimmering in her eyes. His jaw locked and he stood. “I didn’t come here to be disrespectful by any means, Mr. Fisher, but…your daughter’s a grown woman.” Father or not, he didn’t like anyone making her cry. “You have no right to assume what I’m after and it only insults your daughter to insinuate that’s all I would see in her.”

  “I know who Ashlynn is. She’s a woman who’s spent most her life on a farm. A woman I’ve spent most my life protecting. Don’t think to come in here and ask me for the most precious thing I have in this world and expect me to hand it over without consideration. Bottom line, my daughter’s too good for you.”

  True. Ashlynn lowered her head and Kelly was torn between comforting her and trying to persuade her father. He went to his knee, ignoring the other man, and grasped her chin.

  “Love, look at me,” he whispered. “It’s okay. He’s probably right.” Kelly laughed without humor. “Why don’t we go and take some time to let all this settle in.”

  She blinked at him and a tear slid past her lashes. She nodded. “I’ll meet you out front. I’d like to talk to my father for a moment.”

  Kelly glanced over his shoulder at Roy who was studying them with a curious expression on his face. He kissed her cheek and stood. “I’ll be on the porch if you need me.”

  * * * *

  When the door closed behind Kelly she turned to her father.

  “Sug, you have to understand I’m only looking out for your best interests.”

  “You have no right,” she whispered with venom.

  He drew his shoulders back. “Sweetheart, he’s a—”

  “Don’t.” She cut him off. “Do you have any idea how lonely I am? Do you? I’m twenty-four years old. I have no friends, no life, and I only started dating a few months ago.”

  “You have to give it time, sug.”

  She shot to her feet. “I’ve given it twenty-four years! Do you think I’m chasing them back with a stick? I know I’m nothing special. So does every other man that passes me by.”

  “They’re fools,” her father snapped.

  She lowered her voice. “Kelly’s the first man who actually asked me for more, Daddy. Not only that, he waited.”

  Her father’s sun bleached eyebrows lifted to his hairline. “He has a reputation, Ashlynn. Not all men are honest.”

  “I believe Kelly is. He may be a lot of things, but he’s never been dishonest with me about who he is. When we dated a few months ago, it didn’t last long because I knew I couldn’t give him what he needed. We broke up, but he never stopped looking out for me. Kelly’s gone out of his way for me more than any man I know aside from you, Daddy. I’ve tried to stay away from him and I’ve been miserable since. I want him.”

  “I thought you were upset about Josh.”

  “Josh meant nothing. I thought he was the kind of man I should date because he’s Christian and soft spoken, but there was nothing between us an
d eventually…” She shrugged. “There were others too, but none of them mattered. I always came back to Kelly.”

  Roy shut his eyes and gripped his temples, spanning a large hand over the bridge of his nose. “Ashlynn, sweetheart, men…” He shook his head as if it pained him to talk to her about such things. “Not all men are like me. The day I made my vows to your mother I never thought of another woman again. Some men aren’t as strong when it comes to being monogamous.”

  “I know that, Daddy. I’m not a kid anymore. I know what a man like Kelly will need to be content.”

  Her father winced. “I suppose I should count myself lucky you waited this long.”

  She smiled sadly at her father and squeezed his wrist affectionately. “I love him, Daddy. I have since I was a little girl.”

  He shut his eyes and seemed to deflate. “Invite him back in.”

  Her cheeks tightened as she smiled. “Really?”

  He cupped her face. “I couldn’t give you everything you deserved, sug, but I can’t deny you either. I can give you this. And I’ll be damned if I chase him off and you go running away with him. I plan on giving my daughter away to the man she marries, nice and proper like.”

  She threw her arms around him and kissed his cheek. “I love you, Daddy.”

  His heavy arms pulled her close. “I love you too, sug.” As he eased back there was a mischievous look in his eyes. “Do me a favor. Go get my gun, but leave the bullets in the drawer.”

  “Roy Fisher, I will not!”

  He laughed. “You’re no fun.”

  “And you’re a terrible shot. I won’t have you putting holes in my fiancé by accident.”

  “It’s not loaded!”

  “Still.”

  * * * *

  Kelly kicked up the dirt as he waited for Ashlynn. He should’ve known something like this would happen. Over the past few months he’d gone crazy dreaming of her, even when he was awake.

  He cared about her in a way he never cared about anyone, which was nuts since they hadn’t even slept together. When he’d heard Josh had broken up with her, he wanted to punch the kid and hug him at the same time.