A Real Cowboy

by Carla Cassidy

* * *

  Nicolette was determined to have a good time tonight. Despite the fact that she still didn’t know who was after Sammy and why, in spite of the fact that Lucas had once again reminded her that he was unavailable emotionally to any kind of love, she needed to let herself go so that Sammy could fully enjoy the evening.

  She dressed for dinner in a clean pair of jeans, a red-and-black sleeveless blouse and her boots. She pulled her hair up in a high ponytail and found a red kerchief to tie around it, giving her a cowgirl flair.

  She’d just finished putting on a little mascara and spritzing herself with her perfume when Cassie appeared in the bathroom doorway.

  Although Cassie also wore jeans, she topped them with a silky coral blouse and gold jewelry. “You look more like you’re going to a fancy restaurant than to a cowboy’s dining room,” Nicolette said.

  “All my T-shirts were dirty and I didn’t feel like washing clothes. Did Lucas tell you what Cookie planned for the meal?”

  “He didn’t say. Whatever it is I’m sure it will be good.” Together the two women went downstairs, where Sammy and Lucas awaited them.

  “Our escorts should be here anytime,” Lucas said. Nicolette couldn’t help but notice that he wore his holster and gun. With him and two more armed cowboys, her son’s safety would be ensured as they walked the distance between the house and the cowboys’ quarters.

  “I can’t wait to eat Cookie’s food and listen to Mac play his guitar. It’s gonna be a great night,” Sammy exclaimed with excitement.

  “Yes, it’s going to be a great night,” Nicolette replied. She was determined to make it so.

  Sammy looked out the window. “Here they come. It’s Clay and Brody.”

  “I don’t know if I’ll ever figure out who is who among them all,” Nicolette said ruefully.

  “Clay has blond hair and Brody has brown hair,” Sammy explained. “Clay is a womanizer and Brody is a hard-ass.” Sammy clapped his hand over his mouth and stared at his mother as Lucas released a deep rumble of laughter.

  “Who told you that?” he asked.

  “That’s what Dusty told me when I had pizza with everyone,” Sammy replied. “Sorry I said the A word, Mom. It just slipped out.”

  “Well, let’s go meet Mr. Womanizer and Mr. Hard-Ass and head to dinner,” Cassie said.

  The four of them stepped out on the back porch as Clay and Brody arrived. “Don’t you ladies look positively lovely tonight,” Clay said.

  Cassie and Nicolette exchanged glances and instantly the two of them got a case of the giggles. Lucas frowned, Brody glared, Clay was clueless and Sammy looked at Cassie and his mom as if they’d both gone crazy.

  The two females quickly got themselves under control and they all set off to the building in the distance. Both Clay and Brody wore holsters with guns, and the sight of them sobered Nicolette as she thought of the reason for their armed escort.

  She mentally shook herself, refusing to go down that path, not now, not tonight. Hopefully, when she spoke to Vincent Veringo the next day she’d finally be able to make sense of everything that had happened since they’d been at the ranch.

  Sammy walked between Lucas and Clay while Brody followed behind the women. The lights of the bunkhouse beamed out in the semidarkness of evening as if welcoming them.

  They circled around to the back of the building to the dining room. The savory scent of cooking meat filled the air.

  “Roast and potatoes with Cookie’s gravy,” Clay said. “You all are in for a culinary treat tonight.”

  They entered the door to find several of the cowboys already lounging behind the picnic tables on the sofas. All of them stood at the sight of Cassie and Nicolette.

  “Down, boys,” Cassie said. “Tonight I’m just here for a meal and a little music.” She turned to look at one of the tall handsome cowboys. “Mac, I understand you’re going to entertain us with your guitar after dinner.”

  Mac nodded and eased back down on the sofa. “That’s the plan. I want to see if Sammy can kick up his boots and dance to the music.” His eyes twinkled as he gazed at Sammy.

  Sammy looked up at Lucas. “Can you dance to the music?” he asked.

  “I’ve been known to handle myself on the dance floor if I have the right partner,” Lucas said, and his gaze slid to Nicolette.

  “Then, you can dance with Mom and I’ll dance with Cassie,” Sammy replied.

  “Your mom and Cassie will have plenty of partners tonight if they feel like dancing,” Clay said.

  They all turned as several more cowboys entered the dining room, and it got noisier with each arrival. Finally they were all present and Cookie announced that the meal was ready.

  The food was served buffet style in large warmers set on a solid table close to the kitchen. The men insisted Nicolette, Cassie and Sammy fill their plates first.

  There was pot roast with tender potatoes and carrots, a tub of thick brown gravy, green beans and an apple cobbler that made Nicolette’s mouth water. At the end of the table sat plenty of hot coffee and several pitchers of iced tea.

  Nicolette suspected that on most nights beer was also on the menu, but there was no sign of alcohol tonight. The three of them sat at a nearby picnic table and were joined there by Lucas, Clay, Brody, Mac, Forest and Adam.

  Cassie had a good handle on who was whom and greeted Flint, Jerod, Sawyer, Tony, Nick and Dusty, who sat at the table next to theirs. Nicolette was vaguely impressed with her friend for being able to greet all twelve men by name. Maybe she was becoming more involved here than she realized.

  The mood was light and the men teased and tormented each other and occasionally ribbed Sammy, who radiated happiness with their attention. If Sammy wanted Lucas to be his father, then he’d want these men to be his big brothers, and they treated him as if he were a beloved little brother.

  Conversations swirled around Nicolette as she ate the delicious meal. There was love in this room. Remembering what Lucas had told her about where the men had all come from, how they had all happened to be here, was it any wonder that they’d formed a family based on love and respect of each other?

  The possibility that Cassie might sell the ranch and destroy all of this broke Nicolette’s heart. These were men who gained strength from each other, who had forged friendships based on the common traumas of their pasts. It just didn’t seem right to tear down what had been built over the years here.

  “You’re very quiet,” Lucas said, leaning close to her.

  “Just taking it all in,” she replied.

  “There’s a lot of testosterone in the room,” he replied.

  She laughed. “That’s okay. It’s obvious you all care about each other.”

  His eyes darkened for just a moment. “This is my family.” She knew he must be concerned about what the consequences would be to each of them if and when Cassie decided to sell.

  “Tell me about them,” she said.

  His eyes lightened as he began to tell her about his fellow cowboys. He didn’t talk to her about their pasts, but rather focused on the kind of men they were now.

  He told her that Clay’s reputation as a womanizer was highly exaggerated and that Dusty had a crush on a waitress in town. He said that Forest was a gentle giant, and that Sawyer usually had to be carried home from the Watering Hole in town because he was the biggest drinker of the group.

  As he spoke, she began to see them not just as a bunch of cowboys but as individuals with good characteristics and some flaws. She was just grateful these men were on her side, that they had shown her in a million ways that they took care of their own and, at least at the moment, they considered Sammy and Cassie and herself as part of their family.

  After dinner, Mac broke out his guitar and the men shoved the picnic tables to one side, baring an area that could be used as a dance floor.

  Initially, Mac played soft songs that Nicolette had never heard before and they all lounged around him on the sofas and chairs. Sammy leaned against Nicolette, a
smile never leaving his face while he watched Mac strum the strings to create beauty.

  After playing several slow songs, Mac began to tap his foot and burst into a rousing rendition of a popular country song with a dancing beat.

  Adam pulled Cassie up from the sofa. “Come on, boss, let’s see if you can dance better than you do bookkeeping.”

  At the same time Clay grabbed Nicolette by the hand. “Let’s dance,” he said as he pulled her up from the sofa.

  Before long Sammy was dancing with Dusty and then Cassie danced with Brody and Sawyer took the place of Clay. Nicolette danced song after song, partners changing frequently and laughter abounding.

  She couldn’t help but notice that Lucas didn’t dance with her, although he took a turn with Cassie, proving to be adept on his feet and with plenty of rhythm.

  Just when she thought Mac was winding down, she was spun around and into Lucas’s arms. “I think I gave everyone else a chance. Now it’s my turn,” he said, tightening his arm around her waist.

  “Are you having fun?” he asked as they moved seamlessly together with the music.

  “It’s been a wonderful night, just what we all needed,” she replied. She was half-breathless by his nearness and overwhelmed by the familiar scent of him. “I have a feeling this is a night Sammy will never forget. I know I’ll never forget it.”

  “I’m glad you had a good time,” he replied, his breath warm on the side of her face.

  “Did you all used to do this with Cass? Have a night of dancing?”

  “Once in a while.” He smiled in amusement. “Cass wasn’t as light on her feet as you and Cassie. Dancing with her was more like dancing with a hardheaded bull who insisted on leading.”

  She laughed and then sobered. “I don’t think I’ve ever told you that I’m sorry for your loss, for everyone’s loss. She must have been such a strong, special woman.”

  “She was the glue that kept us all together, that kept us grounded.”

  The music ended and he stepped back from her. “It’s probably time we get back to the house. It’s after nine.”

  “After nine?” She was shocked by how time had flown. She looked around for Sammy and found him seated next to Dusty on the sofa. He looked happy, but tired.

  It didn’t take long to round up a couple of escorts to walk them all back to the house. Dusty and Lucas walked on the outside of the three of them and Forest brought up the rear.

  It was a quiet walk with the stars twinkling overhead and the scent of the pasture grass and the evening dew creating a sweet fragrance.

  Once again Nicolette found herself never wanting to leave this beautiful piece of the country. She could envision herself in a small house with a back porch where she could sit in the evenings and smell the country air and watch Sammy run around the yard catching fireflies. She thought of small-town socials and homemade ice cream, of barn dances and going back to her original desire to become a teacher.

  What she didn’t think of was a life here in Bitterroot with Lucas. He’d made it clear in a dozen ways that he didn’t intend to be a part of anyone’s future.

  Could she stay here and build a life for herself and Sammy, knowing that she would probably run into Lucas in the café or at a store? Could she do that and not have her heart break each and every time they accidentally ran into each other?

  They reached the house and Cassie pulled the house key from her pocket. Cassie, Sammy and Nicolette stood with Lucas on the back porch while Dusty and Forest went inside to make sure that nobody had broken in while they’d been gone.

  While she waited for the all clear, Nicolette stared up at the stars, wishing she had all the answers they needed to solve the danger surrounding Sammy, wishing that she knew what was best for her future and Sammy’s.

  She looked up at the man who stood next to her. She knew he loved her son. If only he loved her, too.

  I ride alone.

  His words thundered in her head, reminding her that not all wishes made on stars came true.

  Chapter 14

  As usual Lucas was up before dawn and seated at the kitchen table. He was on the verge of a foul mood prompted by the dreams he’d suffered all night long.

  Once again they hadn’t been nightmares from his traumatic past, but rather dreams of what could be if only he allowed himself to let go of all control where Nicolette and Sammy were concerned.

  Watching her last night dancing with the other cowboys had shot a shocking swell of possessiveness through him even as her laughter had warmed his soul.

  He’d never wanted another woman in his life. He’d been comfortable occasionally seeking company from several women in town who had no interest in anything but a sexual relationship.

  Sex with Nicolette was better than with anyone else he’d ever been with, but his emotions toward her were so much more complicated than just lust and physical desire.

  Her happiness was important to him. He wanted to know what her future held, what her deepest dreams for herself and her son were and if she’d find the man who could be her everything, be Sammy’s everything.

  And that irritated him.

  He sipped his coffee and stared out the window blankly, his mind racing with thoughts he shouldn’t possess, thoughts that shouldn’t even be entertained.

  Surely once they figured out and neutralized the danger to Sammy, then he could get back to the bunkhouse, back to his real work, and these crazy feelings for Nicolette and Sammy would eventually vanish.

  He wondered what the lawyer would have to tell her today. Did he hold the key to who was behind the kidnapping attempts on Sammy?

  Lucas hoped so. He needed to get out of this space, away from Nicolette’s daily presence, and go back to being a cowboy with nothing more on his mind than work and an occasional Saturday night spent at the local bar and dance hall, the Watering Hole.

  He told himself the smartest thing to do was to get another cowboy to bunk in here for a few days so that he could gain the distance he desperately needed, but he’d promised Nicolette he’d see this through, and in his heart he knew that Sammy would be upset if it was anyone else but him in the spare bunk in his room.

  He was on his second cup of coffee when he heard the patter of little feet and Sammy appeared in the kitchen doorway, his eyes huge and his lower lip trembling ominously. “I had a bad dream,” he said.

  The kid definitely looked little and fragile and in need of a hug. Lucas scooted back from the table and patted his lap. “Why don’t you crawl up here and tell me about it.”

  Sammy didn’t wait for a second invitation. He scurried to Lucas and into his lap. He leaned against Lucas’s chest and released a trembling sigh.

  “I’m not sure I want to talk about it. I’m too scared,” Sammy said. He looked up at Lucas, his eyes filled with innocence and fear. “Do real cowboys get scared?”

  Lucas nodded. “Real cowboys sometimes get scared.”

  “What do they do about it?” Sammy asked as he snuggled his warm little body closer against Lucas.

  “They face their fears.”

  “Then I guess I should tell you about my dream. That way I’m facing my fear like a real cowboy. I dreamed that Mom was missing and you and all your cowboys couldn’t find her anywhere.”

  As he continued to describe the night terrors that had plagued him, Lucas marveled at how good it felt to hold the little cowboy on his lap, to feel the complete and utter trust and love that flowed from Sammy.

  This was what it was like to have a child, to care deeply about something...someone outside of yourself. Lucas didn’t remember ever being held and comforted by his mother and if he was to guess, Sammy had no memories of being cuddled against his father.

  Sammy finally wound down but remained on Lucas’s lap for several long minutes. “I faced my fear and now I feel better,” he finally said. “Maybe we should make breakfast for the women this morning.” He climbed off Lucas’s lap.

  “How about you set the table and I’ll st
art frying up some sausage,” Lucas replied. “We’ll make some biscuits and gravy for breakfast.”

  While they worked, Sammy chattered about the bunkhouse fun the night before. “Tony told me his mom was Italian and his dad was a real Indian.”

  “He’s Choctaw Indian. His last name is Nakni, and that means warrior,” Lucas explained. He added a couple of strips of bacon to the awaiting skillet.

  “Cool,” Sammy replied. “Are they all nice to me because of you?”

  Lucas looked at him in surprise. “No, I think they’re all nice to you because they like you.”

  Sammy nodded in satisfaction and continued to set the table.

  “Do you have a lot of friends back in New York?” Lucas asked.

  Sammy set the last spoon in place and then sat at the table. “Not really. I mean, I had some school friends, but usually after school I had to spend most of my time at the store with Mom and Cassie.” Sammy smiled at him. “But, now I’ve got you and the other cowboys as my friends.”

  Until they left here and Sammy had to return to his life in the city, Lucas thought. And then the odds were good he’d go on to be a latchkey kid, lonely and easy pickings for the wrong crowd of friends.

  Not your problem, Lucas reminded himself firmly.

  By the time the sausage was fried, Cassie was up and dressed for the day. “Good morning,” she greeted them cheerfully as she walked toward the coffeemaker.

  “You sound chipper this morning,” Lucas replied.

  “I’ve still got Mac’s guitar strumming playing in my head.” She carried her cup and sat at the table next to Sammy. “It was such fun last night.”

  She took a sip of her coffee and then continued, “And Adam and I agreed last night that one week from today we’re taking down the shed. He’s going to arrange for a bulldozer or whatever equipment we need to take it all the way out and then we’ll lay new flooring and rebuild.”

  Then you’ll sell out and take Nicolette and Sammy back to the city with you. The thought depressed him more than it should. Aside from the fact that her move would place the lives of twelve cowboys in limbo, he would miss these early morning minutes with his little cowboy. He would miss sitting outside on the porch under the starlit skies with Nicolette. He would miss their laughter, their energy that filled the space around them.