Queen of the City 2: The Life of a Female Rapper

by Tamicka Higgins

  Prince and I slept all night in the same spots on the bed until housekeeping woke us the next morning. “No, I’m good, come back later,” I yelled out to her after she knocked on the door. Prince opened his eyes with a look of panic when he heard my voice. He reached up above him as if he was trying to pull himself up and that’s when I sat up in the bed, the pain radiated through my collarbone, but I didn’t give any thought to it. He gasped for air as I pulled him up to a seated position. His eyes scanned the room and then suddenly, tears fell from his eyes and he screamed out with gut-wrenching cries. I grabbed him and put my good arm around him, but he squirmed and fought me off as if he didn’t recognize me. “Prince, Prince, it's mommy! It’s ok, it’s Mommy!” I said frantically as he continued to swing his arms and legs to try to get away from me. I held him as tight as I could and rocked him as he continued screaming. Eventually, tears began to fall from my eyes and onto the top of his head. “What did they do to my baby”, I said out loud, “what did they do to him?!” He cried out loud, and I wasn’t able to console him, and it was one of the most helpless feelings I’d ever had in my life.

  Chapter 14

  Later that day, I called Vinny to come to the hotel room after he got off work. When he walked in, Prince was still crying, and he had been doing it off and on ever since he woke up this morning. Sometimes, he would just whine as though he was irritated, but other times it was a flat-out scream at the top of his lungs as if he was in pain. Vinny walked into the room, “Damn, what’s wrong with Prince?” he asked as he walked over to him on the bed. Prince’s face was completely covered in tears, and his nose was running. “I don’t know. I mean, he doesn’t have a fever or anything, and when I checked his symptoms on the internet, none of it was making sense to me.” Vinny picked him up into his arms as Prince’s screams simmered down a little bit.

  “Maybe he’s teething?” he said, “Did you check his gums?”

  “Yeah, I felt around in there, and I didn’t feel any teeth. I don’t know Vinny; I think they did something to my baby when they had him. He’s been acting funny ever since I got him back.”

  “Well, he’s been through a lot. Even for a baby, you know? I mean, we would think that since he’s not even one yet that none of that stuff would affect him, but children are hard to read sometimes.”

  Vinny rocked Prince, and it seemed as if it only took him a few moments to completely stop crying and begin to fall asleep. I looked over at him, “That’s fucked up. I’ve been rocking him like that all damn morning, and that little nigga wasn’t trying to have none of it from me.”

  Vinny laughed, “You just don’t have that touch, I guess. I mean, the ladies tell me I have that touch so a nigga must have that touch, you know what I’m saying?”

  “Whatever nigga. But yo, I think I’m going to leave the city, though. I’m starting to think I have to.”

  “Why? Whassup?”

  “Well, first of all, I can’t stay in the fuckin’ hotel forever. I’ma have to leave eventually, and second, look outside real quick.”

  Vinny got up and walked over to the window of my fifth-floor room, still cradling Prince. “Aight, what am I looking at?” he asked. I gingerly walked over to the window; my collarbone was still sore from Keyonna hitting me. “You see that truck? All white with the tinted windows way down there?” He squinted his eyes as he looked to the left, “Yeah.”

  “Well, I been watching the lot pretty much since I been here but for the past two days, that fuckin’ truck has been showing up and parking in the same spot. I know somebody is in there because I saw the door open and close when I was peeping it from the window. I don’t think they could tell I was looking because they didn’t change anything about what they were doing, but I believe that they've been watching me.”

  “How you know something like that is going on?”

  “Vinny, sometimes you just gotta follow your intuition, you know what I’m saying? I mean, shit, you know about that. You followed the same intuition when I told yo’ ass to go back home, but you stayed and parked in the alley to wait for me. Shit, if you weren't there, then I woulda’ got hemmed up by the police.”

  I grabbed his shirt and led him away from the window, “So, I’m just saying, I got a feeling that Nas sent some of his boys after me to get rid of me and get his son back, and all they are doing is plotting how to do it. But one thing I can do myself is plot, you feel me? So, I’m trying to stay a few steps ahead of them.” He laid Prince down on the bed. He started to whine again, but it stopped quickly as he closed his eyes and went back to sleep. “Aight, so what you wanna do?” Vinny asked. I glanced at Prince before answering,

  “I’m gonna leave out of this hotel, but I need somebody to take Prince out with them first. I don’t want him with me if they happen to track me down. He needs to be safe somewhere else.”

  “That’s cool. So, when? Now?”

  “Tomorrow. I gotta set some stuff up first in another city.”

  “Where are you going?”

  “I think I’ma head back to Chicago.”

  “You sure? I mean, you know what—”

  “Yeah, I know what happened to me there, but Chicago is a big enough city to hide in, so I’ll be alright.”

  “You want me to come with you for a minute like I was going to before?”

  I looked over at Prince as he laid asleep on the bed, “You know what, that’s cool. I mean, it seems like you’re the only one that could put him to sleep like that so, yeah. I’ma check with Mrs. Butler first though and see what she thinks about it and then I’ll hit you back later tonight, aight?”

  “That’s cool.”

  “Aight.”

  Vinny plopped down in the chair next to the bed and flipped through the television with the remote control. I walked back over to the window and peeked behind the curtains, still watching for the white truck that was there before. Suddenly, the truck pulled out of its spot and rolled slowly through the parking lot. I moved away from the window as it crept past my room and into the main street. I knew they would be back, and I had to be sure I was gone when they did.

  Vinny left at almost midnight, and Prince had just woken up when he did. I was dreading another episode of Prince screaming at the top of his lungs but to my surprise, he was quiet. I reached out to him as he sat up on the bed, looking around as if he was trying to remember where he was. He saw my outstretched arms but didn’t reach back. I felt a small part of me crumble as he turned away and looked at the television. Shaking my head, I got up and walked to my phone that was plugged up to the charger just a few feet away from the bed. I began searching for areas of Chicago I could move to temporarily, but there was nothing that came up that fit what I was looking for. Everything was too expensive or in the heart of the city, and I knew that neither would be an option for me right now. I walked back over to the window to see if the white suburban was parked outside again but the lot was still clear of it. I called Mrs. Butler. She told me that no matter what her line was always open to me, and it didn’t matter the time of night. I was grateful for that as I reached out to her. “Hello?” She sounded as if she was sleeping.

  “I’m sorry, Mom, did I wake you?”

  “Lyric? No, it’s alright baby, it’s alright. What is it? Are you in trouble? Is Prince ok?”

  I could tell she was becoming frantic, “Mom, everything is Ok. Prince is fine. I was just reaching out to you because I decided to move out of the city. I was going to go to Chicago, but I realize that it may not be the best choice.”

  I waited for her to gather herself, “Ok. Yes, Chicago might not be the best place for you. My guess is that you want to leave the state but stay close?”

  “Yes, Ma’am.”

  “How about Peoria? It’s a bit further out than Chicago, but it is a tiny, peaceful city. I would imagine that you could go there and start completely over without anything to impede your steps.”

  “Peoria? I’ve never heard of that city.”

  “
Oh, it’s nice. I’ve been there once or twice with Allen. It’s very quaint, and I don’t know how well you will adjust to it being a city girl, you, but there is not another place in Illinois that I would recommend over Peoria. If you’d like, I can drive you there.”

  “Let me look into it first so I can see what I can afford there.”

  “Ok, honey. You just let me know, and I’ll make plans, alright?”

  “Yes, Ma’am.”

  “Was there anything else?”

  I glanced over at Prince as his eyes began to bubble with tears. “No, Mom, I’m good. I’m going to get some rest now, ok? I’ll call you tomorrow.” I rushed her off the phone before Prince burst into cries again. I picked him up and rocked him the way Vinny did, but it wasn’t what he wanted. His cries became louder as I sighed and tears fell out my eyes. It was going to be a long night for the both of us.

  It took a few hours for Prince to calm down and it was around 4 am when I researched Peoria, Illinois. There was only about 116,000 people there and the crime rate was extremely low. The housing was affordable for me and even if I didn’t work for the next year, the money I had saved up would be enough to pay rent and my other bills for that time. This is the place, I said to myself. I walked back over to the window to check the parking lot once more. The suburban wasn’t out there. Maybe I was tripping. Maybe that car wasn’t full of Nas’s men, and I was just paranoid. Either way, I knew I still had to leave because I had no idea what Nas was going to be up to once he was released. I knew he wanted Prince, but I wasn’t in a position to hand him over. The only way he would be able to get him is if I was dead, and I think he fully understood that and was preparing for it to happen. I walked back over to the bed and gently laid down, being careful not to wake Prince up from his sleep.

  As I gazed at him, the traits he had of Junie were all gone. The only person I saw when I looked at him was Nas, and it was like this whole time, I had only been imagining Junie’s features in him, and now, the reality of who his father was began to set in. I took a deep breath and flipped the television off and focused on Prince, watching his belly slowly move up and down from his breathing. I prayed to God that the nasty side of Nas wasn’t evolving inside of him, but only time would tell. Moments later, I was asleep.

  Chapter 15

  When I woke up, I wiped my eyes and walked straight over to the window to check the parking lot. The suburban still wasn’t there, and now, I was entirely convinced that I was just paranoid but either way, I knew I still had to make my way out of Milwaukee. Prince was still sound asleep, so I hopped into the shower and washed myself up. My collarbone was still bruised and tender to the touch. The more I saw the discoloration of it, the more I felt that maybe I needed to get it checked out, but I still refused to go into a hospital. I knew I was just stubborn, but there were still too many bad memories for me to walk into one of those buildings on my own free will. When I turned the shower off, I heard some movement at the door, so I froze, thinking I was hearing things. As I sat and waited a few more moments, the sound was gone, so I continued what I was doing. After I wrapped the towel around myself and walked into the room, I screamed and fell backward into the door. Loc sat on the bed with Prince in his arms, still asleep. I looked around the room, expecting to see other men in there but he was the only one. “Loc, Loc, what the fuck? How the fuck did you get in here?!” He didn’t say a word as he cradled Prince in his arms, rocking him slowly. The way he held him was beyond me. I never knew a man like him would be able to hold a baby as delicately as he was right now. “Loc? Loc!” I yelled to get his attention, but he kept staring down at Prince, making sure he was ok.

  I walked over to my nightstand and quickly pulled the gun out from the drawer and aimed it right at him, “Loc, put Prince down. I’m not fuckin’ playin’, and you know I’m not. I will fuckin’ kill you without thinking twice before you walk out of here with my son.” Loc lifted his head in my direction; not one facial expression was detected from him. A cold, stone-faced glare that showed no signs of fear or worries of death. “If I wanted Prince or wanted you dead, it would already be done.” I walked closer to him, aiming the pistol directly at him, saying, “Fuck all that shit, Loc. Put Prince down, man. Please.” He slowly laid Prince down on the bed and stood up, looming over me like a giant. His skin was dark like an oily river, his lips were dark and pursed together. His eyes were dark and unforgiving like he had taken the souls of many people before now. He took a step towards me, but I cocked the pistol, causing him to freeze in his steps. Prince moved around on the bed and then suddenly stopped and went back to sleep. Loc never took his eyes off me as I glanced away to make sure Prince was okay. He could have killed me if he wanted to, I thought to myself; he’s not here to hurt me. It didn’t seem like he was but I couldn’t be too sure.

  “The white suburban outside. Why do you think it hasn’t come back?”

  I didn’t respond to him as I waited for him to explain himself, the pistol still aimed at him. The whole time he watched me, he was fearless. It was like the thought of death didn’t impede his actions in any way, and the same, cold-faced glare looked right back into my eyes. “I killed them. They were sent here to finish the job I didn’t.” I wrinkled my eyebrow, “The job you didn’t?”

  “I was supposed to kill you the day you went to get Prince. After you had got him, I was expected to murder you and take him with me. Everybody knew it, but I couldn’t go through with it. The way you risked your life for your son. How you put yourself in danger and was ready to face whatever consequence just as long as he was safe? It reminded me of a woman that was very special to me. I figured I would just let the police arrest you and put you away so Prince would be out of your hands.”

  I relaxed the gun in my hand, “Who? What woman?”

  “It’s not important. What you need to do is get the fuck out of the city.”

  “I know that already, Loc. I was planning on it.”

  “Plan quicker. I’m here to tell you that Nas is not fuckin’ around. He wants his son back. He wants him raised around him and his people so he will be sure that Prince will follow in his footsteps. You already know he is willing to kill you to make it happen.”

  “Shit, Loc. Shit! What the fuck did I do to that nigga?”

  “He is big on loyalty, and once that shit is gone, you’re dead to him.”

  “How the fuck are you still alive then?”

  “It takes more than a few men to kill me.”

  “Are you leaving the city, too?”

  “No. I’d rather live on my feet than die on my knees, and before you try to use the same shit to stay here, you got a son to think about now. If I had a kid, maybe it would be different for me, but I don’t. You got Prince to think about, and you need to get the fuck out the city.”

  “I know. Prince is the only reason I’m leaving this muthafucka. If it weren't for him, then I would just be here waiting for Nas ass.”

  He walked past me like a boulder, “I’ll drive you out of town just to be safe.” I placed the gun on the nightstand, “I need to make a couple stops first, Loc. I have to say my goodbyes.” His gaze was relentless,

  “We don’t have time for that shit, Lyric.”

  “Fuck that! I’m stopping with or without you, Loc. I’ll do this shit myself if I have to.”

  He glared at me as his jawbones gyrated inside his mouth, “I’ll be outside in a Black Escalade,” and with that, the door shut and he was gone. I looked at Prince as he was just beginning to wake up. I didn’t want to leave by any means, but the way Loc was talking, Nas was coming for me with a full head of steam, so I didn’t have a choice. I got dressed and got Prince ready to go as quickly as I could with only one good arm. I slid my pistol in my waistband and moments later, we were out the door. Loc sat in his truck, just beyond the front door of the hotel. I looked around before I walked to it. He got out and let me in the back and with that, we took off. “Big Mama’s crib, Loc.” I could tell he wasn’t happy about
it, but he went anyway.

  Vinny’s car was parked in the driveway when I got there. I walked to the door, cradling Prince in my good arm. He hadn’t cried once since he woke up this morning and that was a big turnaround from the past few days. Vinny came to the door, “Whassup Lyric?” He let me in as I walked into the front room. Prince reached for Vinny as soon as he saw him. “I think you got a new best friend,” I said as he took Prince in his arms. “No doubt, no doubt,” Vinny said with a smile. He looked out the door at the car that was parked on the street,

  “Who in the car, Lyric?”

  “It’s Loc.”

  “Loc?? The fuck you mean, Loc? Loc, as is Nas’s boy, Loc?”

  “Yo, chill Vinny, chill. He’s good.”

  “Nah, Lyric. Fuck that shit. You say he’s good, and then you end up dead somewhere, and Prince is gone.”

  “Look, I got this shit, aight? Trust me. I’m smarter than that. I felt this nigga out already; he’s good.”