The Sound of Shooting Stars

by Heather Allen

  My lips part in surprise, but I don’t find the humor in her remarks. I’ve seen that Beckett, the soft, caring one. She wants to come out just like Jekyll but Hyde is too strong. Maybe she’s better off thick skinned around all of the drama surrounding these people.

  “Jamie, back then we all sat together at lunch and partied together. Trina and Dani are the unforgiving ones. I think it was at their urging that she decided not to associate with me anymore. I did hate her for what she did but at the time I didn’t know what to believe. Jake was telling me it was a one- time deal and a mistake. Beckett tried to explain that she never would have considered it if she had known that we were still together but she turned her back when I told her I didn’t believe her.”

  With Sam’s admission, things are becoming a little clearer now. I can guess why Beckett didn’t tell anyone about the beach incident. If what she told Sam about Jake is true, she didn’t want anything else to blow up in her face. With this knowledge I have the sudden urge to talk to Beckett. But we haven’t exchanged any words in weeks.

  Sam is studying me carefully. She asks, “Do you hate me Jamie? I’m sorry I didn’t tell you all of it. I just thought that it was Beckett’s fault all this time. Now I’m starting to think it was really Jake all along. Maybe she was telling the truth back then.”

  I pull her forward in a hug and whisper over her shoulder, “Of course I don’t hate you Sam. Thanks for telling me.”

  I push away from her and ask, “Are you going to be okay though? I need to get back.”

  A slow smile spreads over her lips as she takes a deep breath, “I’ll have to be. I guess Jake isn’t really who I thought he was.”

  I nod and warn, “But Sam, before you make any decisions you should find out for sure. It really could be something else that’s kept him away.”

  She looks down her nose at me, “Do you really believe that, Jamie?”

  I shake my head, “No, I don’t.”

  “Me either.” She sinks back into her pillows placing her hands over her face. She looks through her fingers at me. I smile and ruffle her pony tail as I get up.

  “You’re sure you’ll be okay?”

  “Yep, strong chick here, remember.”

  I smirk. She is strong. We all had to be strong when her dad died. She was stronger than I was. At the funeral she squeezed my hand as tightly as she could throughout the service. The pain in my fingers kept my attention from the fact that I just lost the only adult who truly cared about me. After we left the church I ran across the street to the field beyond. Sam yelled for me to stop but I couldn’t. I was devastated and I couldn’t let anyone see how affected I was. When I came home that night after all of their family and friends had left, I knew by the look on Elizabeth’s face that she was done with me. A part of me has wondered all these years that if I had stayed to face his death, would she still have sent me away? I’ll never get that moment back but I can help Sam get through this.

  I lean over and kiss her forehead.

  “Call me if you need anything.”

  She nods pulling her blanket closer to her chest.

  After saying goodbye I make my way down the stairs to the front door. As I reach for the door handle I hear a gasp across the hall. I turn to find Elizabeth, Sam’s mom standing still with her hand over her mouth. She looks the same, her platinum hair cut in a shoulder length style but the lines at the corners of her eyes show the years that have passed. She questions, her voice muffled through her hand, “Jamie Grey, is that you?”

  Surprise and pain register on my face. Shit, I didn’t want to see her today. Reluctantly I remove my hand from the handle and shove both of them into my pockets. I nod and avert my eyes to the floor afraid of the memories that will rush back at me if I have to look at her.

  She takes a hesitant step toward me but stops and admits, “Sam told me that you are going to school with her now. I’m sorry for my…” Her voice trails off and I look back up squinting to hold back the emotion that has flooded me with seeing her again.

  She takes a few more steps forward coming to a stop an arm’s length away. I can tell she is uncomfortable. I stare at her, my glare evening out.

  She recovers from her shock and her voice takes on an all business tone, “Jamie, it’s so good to see you. I heard you’re living with the Chase family.”

  I nod silently. I don’t trust my voice. My fists are clenching in my pockets. I want to punch something. My heart starts beating faster with the anger and hurt.

  She glances to the stairs and asks, “Is Sam up in her room?”

  When she turns back to me I can see pain in her eyes. I turn quickly and grab for the door again. Her hand snakes out to my arm as she softly pleads, “Jamie, wait.”

  But I yank the door open and run out into the relentless heat. I don’t look back until I’ve reached the corner five houses down from Sam’s. My heart is pounding so hard in my chest that I have to stop and take a few calming breaths. I knew seeing Elizabeth would be difficult but I never realized how hard. A week after Steve died she shipped me back into the system. She was the only person who came close to being a mother to me. As my heart beats even out I vow not to go to Sam’s house again. We will have to find somewhere else to hang out. Beckett’s house is out of the question and now so is hers.

  I sneak up to my room and crash, out of energy to even change my clothes. If Marla decides to kick me out at least it will be tomorrow when I might be able to deal with it. I’m finished with today.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Beckett Chase

  Auriga- Charioteer of Horses

  He was the first man to tame and harness four horses to a chariot, imitating the chariot of the Sun god.

  ~*~

  I wake with renewed energy and excitement that today will be the change I need to get my life back. Yesterday I did some planning for today. It was hard all day knowing that the planning I did would change everything but I had to keep telling myself to be patient, which is near impossible because things have been tough for weeks now, at school and at home. The resentment I feel toward Jamie for this has compounded more and more with each day that has passed. He just marched in here and took over my life. It pisses me off. Taking a deep calming breath I get dressed slowly and make sure my hair and makeup are perfect before I leave for school.

  When I walk out to my car I notice the air is stagnant and hot. I can’t wait for the weather to change. Down in south Florida it’s not a significant change but anything is better than eighty degree weather at seven o’clock in the morning.

  ‘I’m Still Here’ by Cay Groves comes on the radio, a perfect song for today. I am still here and pretty soon, everyone will know it. The parking lot is filling quickly when I pull in. As I get out of the car I spot Sam across the rows of cars having a heated conversation with Jake. I’m too far away to hear what she’s saying but her hands are all over the place gesturing to reveal her intense anger. I guess there is trouble in her world. I wonder if Jamie has anything to do with it.

  No one even glances my way anymore. It’s as if I’m a ghost that no one can see. A smile creeps to my lips as I think about how that will change today if my plan works. My feet move swiftly to my locker to get my books. When I pull out the materials for my first class, my gaze catches Dani and Trina walking down the hall. Robin Garris is tagging along behind them. Maybe they’ve replaced me. As Dani approaches the classroom down the hall she turns to Robin and sneers at her. Robin steps back quickly and skitters away as if she is scared. I smirk, maybe not.

  A few classes later I’m back at my locker to exchange books. I turn toward the only class I share with Jamie and spot him on the other side of the hall with a sniffling Sam. I’ve only ever seen her upset one other time and I was the cause of it. The day I had to tell her that I had slept with her boyfriend. I thought that was the lowest I could get but I didn’t know what would be in store for me this year. At least whatever has upset her is not because of anything I did. I trudge to
class not looking forward to Dani’s usual dirty looks. Now that I’ve relocated to the front of the classroom, I’ve become Cara’s favorite person in this class. At least sitting by her lets me avoid any confrontations with anyone else.

  When I leave the class a hand stops me. I’m shocked that anyone wants to talk to me. When I turn my head to find Trina standing there sneering, I’m even more surprised. Her tone is curt when she says, “I need to speak to you.”

  She snakes around me and walks out the classroom door. I follow her into the girl’s bathroom. A few girls are looking into the mirrors but when Trina calls out, “Leave.” They scatter. A sudden realization hits me. The three of us pretty much commanded the attention of the school but I never knew how much influence Dani and Trina really had. I guess I am a perfect example of their power over everyone.

  “Beckett, are you sleeping with Jake again? Because if you think that is going to help you in any way out of your situation, you’re sadly mistaken.”

  I frown at her accusation and my heart speeds up at how mean she is. I never knew she could be so evil.

  “No, of course I’m not.”

  She smiles at my reaction as if she got exactly what she expected. She turns but hesitates facing the door. When she turns back to me her voice is a growl. She admits, “You know he never really liked you.”

  I’m so confused by this whole conversation. I ask to clarify, “Do you mean Jake?”

  Exasperation fills her face, “He only slept with you because Dani asked him to. She needed to get you away from that little pain in the ass, Samantha.”

  My mouth drops open in shock still not quite understanding everything she is telling me.

  “Oh come on, don’t be so surprised. You’re such a prude. She had to give you something in your drink to make sure you gave it up to him. I would venture to guess that you’ve lied this whole time too. He has been the only one hasn’t he?”

  She turns away with a wide grin, satisfied I’ve given her the reaction she wanted. I sink to the floor flabbergasted by what she just told me. Dani drugged me to sleep with Jake. I thought he liked me. And Sam? We were friends and I did exactly what Dani wanted me to do.

  One thing rings so clear to me. Dani is dangerous. I had no idea that she was capable of these things but somehow she has been controlling me all this time. Now, more than ever, my plan needs to work.

  When lunch comes I straighten up, the nerves bubbling through my middle are about the end of me but I try to push them away and aim for the cafeteria. This is the first time I’ve been near the crowded room since the day I stormed out weeks ago. I’ve been spending lunch time by myself in the library. I’ve gotten caught up in all of my classes. That can probably account for the only good thing about this whole disaster. I have turned in all of my assignments in every class and my grades are the best they’ve been in years.

  I approach the double doors and find a spot to the right of them trying for obscurity in the shadows. I don’t have to wait long. I decided to do this without the audience of the whole student body, just in case it doesn’t work. I keep reminding myself of Cassiopeia’s story. Sometimes a sacrifice is necessary. Oh boy, this is the top of the cake.

  Brett comes slowly down the hall looking back over his shoulder at Brandon. He’s smiling at something that was said. He turns forward and meets my eyes. I try so hard to push my confidence out as his brows go up in curiosity. When he’s almost to the doors I step out from the shadows that failed me and say in as strong a voice as I can muster, “Brett, can I talk to you?”

  He looks over at Brandon and tells him to go on ahead to the table. I pass in front of him quickly and aim for the doors at the end of the hall. I can hear his footfalls behind me. My hands reach to push at the door but he scurries forward and smiles as he says, “Allow me.”

  In that moment I pray that my plan will work, it has to.

  The confidence I was missing seems to surge through me as I cross out the opened door. He follows me into the bright sunshine past students eating leisurely at blue picnic tables. I finally halt our progress under a giant oak tree in the middle of the browned grass. We will still have an audience but fewer than if I did this in the cafeteria and they are scattered yards away out of hearing.

  When I turn to face him, he advances forward stopping only a breath away. I back up into the trunk of the tree. His hand raises to rest on the bark above my head. His lips turn up as he asks, “Are you tired of the silence Beckett? Did you have a change of heart?”

  I knew this would be his reaction but it’s harsh hearing it come out of his mouth. I square my shoulders and take a step forward causing him to back up. His hand falls to his side, a look of curiosity crossing his features.

  “Actually Brett, I want to make a deal with you.”

  He laughs and his whole body starts shaking. “Really, this should be good. What do you have that I could possibly want?”

  I look pointedly at him before answering. His smile wavers replaced with a frown.

  “I do have something you’ve wanted for a long time but don’t get your hopes up. I’m not bargaining to sleep with you. That possibility flew away that night at the beach.”

  My voice grows stronger with each word as I continue, “I want back in obviously, and you…well you want at least everyone to think you’re sleeping with me.”

  He laughs again, “Really, you think I’ll go for a deal like that? You want to pretend like we’re what, dating?”

  I nod.

  He chuckles and starts walking away. He turns and calls back, “That’s the best you can do, Beckett? Not interested.” He turns fully and continues to walk backwards while he taunts, “You are a nobody now. I would be crazy to even associate with you.”

  My heart falters at his rejection but I expected it. It might take a couple of days but he’ll come around. Brett has been after me for a long time now. I know he can’t just turn things off like that or at least I hope he can’t. The truth hurts, I am a nobody now. Would it be social suicide for him? I don’t think so.

  I sink into the grass and watch as he yanks the glass doors open. His frustration is apparent in his actions. I give him a day, maybe two until he makes a deal with me. I’m just a little leery at the terms he might come up with. But I have to push that thought away, Brett is nice looking and a football player but no one ever said he had a lot going on upstairs which is what I’m counting on.

  When the bell rings signaling the end of lunch I move forward eager to get the last classes of the day done. Before I make it to the doors they open to reveal a very pissed Jamie walking toward me. His gaze is downturned until he makes it onto the grass when he raises his intense green eyes to mine. I take an involuntary step back unsure why he’s out here. Maybe he saw me talking to Brett. That would suck. He’d try to end my plan before I could even see if it will work. He stops a few feet away and asks angrily, “Are you sleeping with Jake again?”

  As his words register, I remember the scene in the hall this morning with Sam upset. And resentment surges especially after my encounter with Trina in the bathroom. I step forward and reply forcefully, “Of course I’m not. I learned my lesson about him a long time ago.” His stance softens as if he was bracing for a different answer. I add, “It’s too bad Sam didn’t realize what a dick he was back then. Maybe this is someone doing her a favor.”

  Jamie nods in agreement. This surprises me so I ask, “What did she tell you?” I was expecting his fury to continue but he seems resigned.

  He looks around. I follow his gaze to find that we are alone. The tables have emptied. I am now late for class but it seems inconsequential. My heart speeds up and the grasp on my bag tightens. He turns to face me again and we stand in silence for what seems like a hundred beats of my heart but I know it’s only a few seconds before he breaks the silence.

  “She told me what really happened.”

  My brows raise in surprise and my footing falters. But doubt clouds my brain and I ask, “What �
��really happened’?” I stress his wording not believing that Sam told him my side of the story, which now because of Trina’s revelation, is different than what I have come to know.

  “She believes you now Beckett.”

  Anger rises at him, “She believes me now after a year? Of course now that you’ve verified that it’s not me sleeping with him. Oh that’s just perfect Jamie, just fucking perfect.”

  I glare at him, “Tell Sam to leave me alone. She should have taken my word a long time ago. It’s obviously too late now.”

  I push past him to the door. I hear him call my name but I continue on to class.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Jamie Grey

  Sextans – The Sextant

  Polish astronomer Johannes Hevelius in 1687 named the constellation Sextans Uraniae after the instrument he had used to measure star positions until it was destroyed in a fire at his observatory in 1679.

  ~*~

  The sun’s rays shining through the window wakes me up earlier than my alarm. I reach to turn it off before it can ring and angle out of bed, my feet meeting the furry brown rug underfoot. I cross the room to the french doors and pull them to reveal bits of light falling along the water in rivulets. My arms rest on the balcony as I recall the events from the other day. This may be the last time I will get to enjoy this sight. Marla may be shipping me back to Michelle after my performance or lack of. And Elizabeth, sadness fills me remembering how she was affected by seeing me but her expression changed instantly. She had treated me as one of her own, as if I were Sam’s natural brother and then she just threw me out like the garbage.

  I take a step back and glance down the porch to the closed doors on the other end. It’s been hard not talking to Beckett. Every time I’m tempted to say something, whether at dinner or going to her room, I talk myself out of it. It’s been weeks now that she’s existed without even one friend to talk to. I’m not sure it’s a good idea that I should be the first ‘friend’ to step up. Now after talking to Sam last night, I’m glad I haven’t given in. If she is the one that’s been seeing Jake, then I won’t want to speak with her ever again. I blame Jake for hurting Sam again and if I am alone with him anytime soon I might not be able to control my fists. But whoever it is, has as much in it as he does and they are intentionally hurting Sam.