We sat in the guesthouse. Since there were two bedrooms, she knew she was free to sleep over any time but preferred to stay on campus since in a place like L.A. where a car was a necessity, she, unfortunately, didn’t have one.
“Maybe I should introduce you to my stepfather,” I joked out loud before I sipped from my first after-dinner wine.
“I live in Europe, not Mars. I’ve seen Etienne Fournier, and the man is a walking sex god. If it weren’t for your lover boy, Finn, he alone would have driven you nuts with relief to find a man just for the night. Your mother is a very lucky woman indeed.”
I smiled slightly. “Oh believe me you, she is paying through the nose to be in the position she’s in.”
“Well, it’s been great to be here at your place but I better get back to campus. I have read up on the papers we have due, and it is going to be a tough schedule but nothing we won’t be able to handle. That is if you are up to doing your own papers this year.”
I sipped from my wine again before I stood along with Amaani and grabbed my car keys. “Since it sounds like you aren’t giving me much of a choice, I guess I am.”
I paced back and forth in my living room. The Ulysse Nardin pressed to my ear as I heard Finn on the other end, and his voice was literally music to my ears.
“I know I said it would be a few weeks, and I know it’s been a month but we’re almost finished up. I just need to help Brandon close down shop for good and I’ll be back. You’ve waited all this time, you can wait a bit longer can’t you?”
He used that tone of voice meant to calm and satisfy my constantly shot nerves but all it did was annoy the hell out of me.
“Of course I can but why weren’t you honest with how long you were going to be gone in the first place?” I knew I sounded whiny but I couldn’t help it.
I missed him so much and just talking to him made my sex ache, and my nipples harden. I didn’t consider myself a nympho but I needed him so much and for him to sound so close yet be so far away was complete and utter torture.
“I was as honest as I could be. Rich can’t find another connection he trusts so we have been working exclusively for him trying to stock him up with enough product as possible to last until he can find someone else to help him out. We have a couple more runs to Manhattan to make, and then I will be back. I promise you,” he explained.
I nodded my head though he couldn’t see me. “Fine…can you please let me know as soon as you’ve purchased your ticket when you’ll be back here? I am so anxious, and nervous all the time here without you, sweetie.”
“I know, baby, and you also know I will be there as soon as I can. I promise you this, all right?”
I tried to stop the tears from falling. “Talk to you soon then…and I love you.”
“I love you too, Evie.”
I had to end the call if only to try to regulate my breathing. My heart pounded in my chest with a fierceness I had never known, and it was only too late I realized I was experiencing a full on panic attack. The wind seemed to swoosh out of my lungs, I felt light-headed, irritable, frightened—I wanted to break out of my own skin if I could—it was impossible to breathe without wheezing.
I felt a pair of hands on my shoulders and a gentle French voice in my ear, “Breathe deeply, try to hold it in and then slowly, breathe out. You’re experiencing an anxiety attack, and the more you play into it, the worse it is going to become.”
I know I should have hated the invasion of my privacy by Etienne but he did talk me down in a gentle voice and soothing tones from my panic attack. Eventually, my breathing normalized and I almost felt completely like myself again.
“Thank you…how did you know what to do?” I questioned once I found my voice again.
“Well, as a life long sufferer of anxiety attacks, it took some time but eventually, I began to do the deep breathing exercises yoga and Pilates taught me when I was having one, and I am happy to say I have been off Xanax for the past five years. I don’t take anything for them and prefer more homeopathic ways to understanding my body.”
I turned around and came face to face with those gorgeous, clear blue eyes of his with their pale green moon crescents around the pupils. He was still as sexy and untouchable as ever but he seemed softer, more accessible.
“Why aren’t you with my mother?”
“Oh, I suppose she didn’t tell you she was leaving? She’s gone to Switzerland for her yearly regimen. Supposedly she has always gone alone, and that has not changed even if she is a married woman. Athena will be gone for one week and the chauffeur dropped her off at the exclusive star lounge at LAX approximately a half an hour ago. She didn’t even want me to come with her to the airport.”
Although Etienne looked casual in a pair of slightly baggy blue jeans and a short-sleeved Dolce & Gabbana tee shirt, he still appeared extremely sexy. He looked quite pitiful. Though he’d treated me quite dreadful in the past, I couldn’t hold it against him. I know I should have had more of a backbone but I truly felt sorry for him at that moment.
His brown hair, styled as it was, hung in silky soft tendrils, and I wanted to reach out and touch him more than I should have. This drove me absolutely nuts because I was supposed to seriously dislike this man. He was my mother’s husband and I desperately needed to get my shit together. There would be nothing between the two of us, ever. The sooner I realized this, the more content I would be.
I placed my hands on my hips and glared at him defiantly now that my panic attack had passed. “What are you doing here, Etienne? We haven’t exactly been friendly toward one another the last six weeks so what has changed? Why are you so hot and cold? If you tell me this is all about Finn then I will bludgeon you with my bare hands because he has never been against our friendship.”
“True but he doesn’t exactly support it either and with good reasoning, Evie. He’s frightened he might lose you—if you were mine, I would feel the same way. I don’t think I would want any attractive men in your vicinity: full stop.”
My heart began to thud again in my chest and I ran a shaky hand through my hair before I walked over and sat down on the sofa. “Well, you know where everything is. Why don’t you go get a drink and sit down? Maybe we can talk about our very screwed up relationship, and how to fix it because it’s not going to work the way it is right now between us.”
“Agreed,” he replied before he walked into my kitchen.
I still had a half bottle of Sauvignon Blanc on the coffee table. Amaani had managed to drink maybe five ounces of wine but as I finished up the second glass I had poured for myself, I quickly refilled and waited for Etienne with growing anticipation.
He walked out of my kitchen with a Heineken and sat down across from me on the loveseat, which was fine with me. I preferred us like this instead of so close in proximity I could reach out and touch him. My motor was definitely revved and after speaking to Finn, I felt horny and more than just a little reckless. I was scared what would happen if I allowed myself to go there but at the same time, I knew I’d earned a carte blanche from Finn because we still hadn’t cemented our relationship again.
As far as we were both concerned, we were still on hiatus and had been since the incident at Trevor’s house. Yes, we’d become bedmates but I hadn’t promised my heart to him just yet, and he hadn’t put a ring on my finger. I still wore his bracelet but it was also a birthday present, and one I refused to take off except when I took showers or swam—which was once or twice a day for no more than an hour, max.
I sipped from my wine and stared at my mother’s husband. He sat with his legs comfortably apart, and watched how he studied me as much as I studied him in quiet contemplation.
“So, what’s going on? I haven’t seen you this down in a while?” I finally asked.
He clutched his Heineken tightly before he swigged from it and swallowed half the bottle in a couple of swallows. “Your mother, that’s what. She knew when we met I was a model but now she doesn’t want me to do my job because she says it’s undi
gnified, and unbecoming of me. It’s obvious not only does she want to control you but she also ultimately wants to control me as well and I don’t find that the least bit satisfying. Sorry, it’s not the way I was brought up. I don’t want a woman to take care of me especially when I am very much capable of bringing in my own income.”
I shook my head and although I didn’t want to feel a tinge of glee, I did. Etienne was only getting back his just desserts; right when he thought he had my mother wrapped around his finger, she had proven time and again, she would do anything it took to keep him on a very short leash. If that meant taking away a hot modeling career then she would do it.
“Did you somehow suffer a lobotomy to the brain before you married my mother? She was married to Rolf Sandstrom, last action hero and one of the highest moneymaking actors in the world besides Will Smith, Tom Cruise, the late Bret Carter, and Tom Hanks. She wasn’t going to allow a husband of hers to carry on with a career as desirable as modeling.
“You don’t think she is afraid of all the competition she faces with you being out on shoots and walking down the runway? I’m sorry, sweetheart, but either you go back to school, and get some business credentials or you will have to face the fact that your future will be one as a house-husband and not much else.”
His expression barely changed but the grimace on his face dug deeper into his handsome features. “How can you be so sure?”
“Because I know my mother and…she’s a snob. She regularly sits next to Anna Wintour and André Leon Talley from American Vogue Magazine. Do you really think she feels it is okay, let alone part of the cultured image she has worked so hard to promote, to have a husband that actually walks the runway? She doesn’t want to see your face and body on a billboard in Times Square or on Sunset or anywhere else. You belong to her now, and although you make brilliant arm candy, all you are is a pretty vessel and nothing else.”
I swigged from my wine. “Welcome to the world of the rich and famous. When the rich marry out of their income tax bracket, their spouses are treated like children. You are to be seen and not heard. The more you stay out of her way, the easier it will be for you. She no longer needs you except in a sexual capacity and when those needs become few and far between, well, I hope you have a nice nest egg set up. Your days are numbered, Etienne, and although it will be quite lonely for her at first to be twice divorced, she will find some older yet fabulously wealthy man who will be perfect for her though he’ll be a dud in bed. It’s the sacrifice she is willing to make.”
Etienne finished his beer and stood shakily to his feet. “Are you trying to tell me I have been nothing but a prop? All those declarations of how much she loved me were nothing but a lie?”
“Unfortunately for you.” I shrugged my shoulders. “She’s good at knowing people’s weak spots, that’s for sure. If she has told you she’s put you in her will, check carefully because that might be a lie too—”
“It can’t be! It was confirmed by her attorney!” he exclaimed with an overenthusiastic yet childish zeal.
“So that must make it true.” I tried to stifle a laugh. “Athena gave birth to me—that is to say she carried me for nine months and pushed me out of her womb—yet she dispatched of me for eight years. She needed to trap my father and she did everything in her power to do so. I think he gave in because he was tired of fighting her. Despite all that effort, they were barely married for nine years. I’m not trying to tell you anything you don’t already know. She learned from the master when it came to using people, and manipulation techniques. You can believe what ever it is you want to believe about my mother but that doesn’t make it true.”
Etienne began to pace my living room floor. “All this time, you have been dropping hints for me and I didn’t get them. I feel like such a fool.”
“Well, don’t. My mom makes herself hard to read on purpose. She is a consummate actress with two Academy Awards after all.”
He paced for a little while longer before he threw himself onto the sofa next to me. I finished up my wine and decided I’d had enough. He was too close for comfort. If I was honest with myself, I would be able to admit that I wanted him as much as he wanted me at that moment, and that wasn’t a good thing at all.
What about Finn?
That small voice of reasoning resonated in my head and yet, all my runaway hormones could think about was I had a man here in my presence who was hot, sexy as hell, and unmistakably belonged to my mother. I had managed to turn him against her in so many words and there was still a part of me that refused to forgive Finn for what had gone down at Trevor’s house.
He made you suck him off in front of all those people who are part of your crowd—they took pictures and filmed the episode. You might be safe for now but what about a year from now? Five years from now? Ten years from now? Do you want that to surface ever? Do you relish being the Paris Hilton or Kim Kardashian of your generation where the only thing you are known for is a poorly filmed sex tape circulating out there in cyberspace, and distributed by Vivid Video?
The thought made my blood boil but what could I do? Drugs were bad and yes, I could also expose my peers who had been there that night but they would have their publicists who would dismiss the evidence as something their clients did when they were young and stupid. It would hardly tarnish their reputations, and wasn’t nearly as damaging as my sexual escapades.
Did it matter I’d only given Finn a blowjob, and there had been no penetrative sex? Would anyone care or would I still be the disgraced daughter of Rolf Sandstrom and Athena Donahue? Just another “stupid girl”, spoiled Beverly Hills brat?
I stood to my feet and immediately felt lightheaded from too much wine. “Listen, it’s been an eye-opening experience discussing my mother with you but I should go to bed. I have had too much to drink, and although it is Friday, I am looking forward to nothing but a boring weekend of studying and preparing for a couple of papers that are due within the next few weeks.”
I knew he had also stood, and felt the heat of his body radiate off him in waves. He was too close to me; I could smell the expensive cologne he wore and the scent seemed to overwhelm me with woodsy, mossy tones followed by a strong undercurrent of sandalwood, balsam and honeysuckle. My body didn’t feel like it was under my control as I leaned back ever so slightly and came in contact with his hard body.
Etienne whipped me around to face him and before I knew it, his lips were on mine but this wasn’t just a kiss. His breath—a mixture of spearmint and Heineken—stole my own, and his tongue sought mine out in a hungry and overwhelming need to connect with someone.
I didn’t want to be the person he fell for but at the same time, a part of me succumbed with abandon and thoughts of Finn faded from my mind. He pulled me to him and held me tightly as his mouth moved over mine. I surrendered to the feeling of his arms wrapped around my waist and somehow, my mind went blank. All that mattered was that particular moment in time, and how it took me over and drowned out the world in the process.
His hands and fingers worked at the zipper of my printed floral dress before he slid down the wide straps from my shoulders and freed my breasts. I had never felt so naked before even if I still wore the bottom part of the dress. It wasn’t like I had never shared myself with another man other than Finn but this whole situation was completely different, and so far beyond the scope of my imagination, I couldn’t process it fully.
Everything happened in slow motion. We still kissed yet he had set me on the arm of the sofa, and one of his hands had torn off my frivolous thong. His fingers worked in and out of me at a feverish pace. My whole face heated up as I could feel an orgasm building so deep inside of me, I had no idea it existed in the first place. He ground the palm of his hand against my mound and as the flattest part of his hand somehow came in contact with my clit while his fingers worked inside of me, I came in a wave of pleasure and exquisite pain.
My head pounded with ferocity as he picked me up and carried me to my bedroom. I collapse
d on the bed like a rag doll and watched with growing fascination as he removed all of his clothing. His body was hard and tanned, much harder than Finn’s who was completely lean and possessed hidden muscles. He’d obviously been lifting weights, and if he wanted to go back to modeling, there would be no doubt they would make him lose weight. He had to be at least fifteen to twenty pounds bigger than they would want a male model to be so why did it bother him so much if my mother didn’t want him to partake in his former occupation?
Etienne climbed on the bed and removed my dress before he tossed it on the floor. I was officially naked but this felt new…I had never been with a man his age. Would he find my body adequate and could I satisfy him? I wasn’t nearly as knowledgeable as my mother was, and despite all the arrogance I possessed because of my youth, I was under no illusion I would be a better lover than my mother. She knew her body inside and out; what turned her on and what didn’t. I could achieve an orgasm but I would never kid myself into believing there were still parts of me I considered a mystery. Until a man explored them or a woman found them, they would be closed off to me for the time being.
He spread my legs and lay between them but his hardness was nowhere near my moist center. Instead he kissed and caressed my breasts while holding them in his hands. His tongue dipped down between the valley of my breasts, and licked me slowly, almost reverently before his wet, warm mouth covered my right nipple and his teeth bit gently on the hardened nub before he suckled and licked it.
My mouth opened and although I wanted to moan out loud, nothing came out but a harsh gasp for air, and the feeling of being pleasured so thoroughly, it went beyond anything I’d experienced before.
When he finally switched breasts and spent as much time on my left nipple as he had on my right, I thought I’d officially die from the ecstasy alone. I was legally drunk but the sex was never the less extremely satisfying, and I couldn’t quite come to terms with that.
Etienne’s mouth dipped lower until I felt his tongue swirl and dart out of my belly button; then lower yet again when his thumbs opened my soaking wet folds and his tongue ran over my clit with gentle precision. I gasped yet again as his tongue explored the opening to my sex and forced his way inside me. It was a magnificent sensation, and I spread my legs as far apart as I could get them.
Dangerous Games Page 18
