Taking Risks

by Cassie Allee

  I dipped my hand inside his boxers and the feel of his hardness in my hand had me panting for more. I started to stroke him gently. While I was doing that Risk pulled my body around to the side of him and worked a hand in between my thighs. I still had my panties on, but as soon as his hand grazed over me I almost exploded. I was shaking and shivering as he made little circles through the thin cotton in just the right places. I started to stroke him faster as the swell in the pit of my stomach rose and I felt that I was close to my release. Suddenly, the sensation stopped and I was pushed down onto my back.

  “I want to make this last for you. I want this to be special.” He whispered in my ear and his breath sent tingles all over my body.

  He lowered his mouth to my nipple and cupped my breast with his hand. He licked and sucked on the nub until I was squirming for more. His mouth left my breast and he slid my panties off. I was completely exposed to him, and I didn’t care at all. My entire life, at the moment, was centered on Risk and how I needed him to touch me and be inside of me. He lowered his mouth and began kissing the crease where my thigh met my groin. He kissed every inch of those creases until he settled his mouth on my core. As he flicked his tongue over me I felt a heat rise inside me. Suddenly, my entire world went black and all I could concentrate on was that one sensation until, finally, my muscles relaxed.

  I was acutely aware of Risks mouth making its way back up my body. He leaned down and kissed me lightly.

  “You still have time to stop me. I haven’t stolen your virtue yet. If that was enough for you, we can stop.” He panted.

  “No. This is one Risk I’m willing to take.” I winked at him and he laughed heartily at my play on words and began kissing me again. I flinched as he pushed his way into me inch by inch. It didn’t hurt nearly as bad as what I had expected, in fact, the pain was a welcome sensation with the pleasure. He slid, slowly, with a steady pace in and out of me, and it was like nothing I had ever felt before. I had never felt so connected to someone else in my entire life. I was lost in the sensation of each thrust as I felt the heat rise in me again and I lost control. I broke away from our kiss to let out a moan, and as my muscles clenched around Risk I felt him let go too. Listening to his sounds of pleasure just added to the intensity of my orgasm and I bit his shoulder as my nails dug into his back. After one last thrust, Risk collapsed on top of me.

  After we laid there a while in each other’s arms Risk kissed my temple and got up to put his boxers back on. “I’m going to get a drink, do you need anything?” I smiled a bright smile and shook my head no. Just before he was completely out of the room, he doubled back and said, “Are you okay Marlee? Was that okay?”

  I chuckled at him. “That was amazing Risk. It was…perfect.”

  He smiled a genuinely happy smile that made me weak in the knees then he left the room. As soon as I could hear him downstairs, I shot up out of the bed. “Shit.” There was a blood spot on the sheets, just as I suspected there would be. I had heard the stories and read all of the romance novels that warned that it would happen. I frantically stripped the sheets, while still naked, and replaced them with clean ones, then I tip toes across the hall to the bathroom so that I could freshen up. The mirror showed me that my hair was a tangled mess and I hadn’t gotten rid of all of the mascara that had run down my cheeks from crying. I pulled a brush through my waves and washed my face before covering myself in a towel and going back to my bedroom.

  Risk was there, sprawled out on my bed and waiting for me. I dropped my towel and jumped under the covers next to him. I felt like a perfectly fitted puzzle piece as I nestled into his side. I was so warm and comfortable as I listened to his steady heartbeat and I quickly fell asleep.

  That night I slept so soundly that my nightmare never came and I was well rested for the first time in two weeks. When I opened my eyes, I heard Risks heavy breathing and smiled to myself. I could see out of my window that it was a beautiful Saturday morning and I didn’t have to be at work until the evening. I started to reminisce about the details of my night when I heard someone clear their throat. I slowly turned to see Gray standing in the middle of my room, tapping his foot. I took a peek at Risk to make sure that he hadn’t woken up and then, as gently as I could, untangled myself from his body. I tried my best to keep us both covered. Gray watched my struggle and giggled at me. As soon as I was free of Risk, I motioned Gray to turn around so that I could put some clothes on.

  Gray obliged and I threw on a t-shirt and shorts in a hurry knowing that he would get impatient and turn back to face me. I knew he would find that as another opportunity to make fun of me and I would never live it down. I stalked passed Gray into the hallway, shutting the door to my bedroom behind me, and Gray followed.

  “So you’ve known this boy for two weeks and you just handed yourself over to him? That just doesn’t seem like something you would do, Spud.” Gray said with a disappointed scowl.

  “Look Gray, it’s really none of your business, but I’ll humor you. I think I love him…” I had only just realized it myself and the thought made me nervous.

  “I can see that Mar…” Gray sighed. “We just have a lot going on right now and it’s dangerous for you. Being in a new relationship takes a lot of time and clouds judgment. No matter what, we have to get to the bottom of what’s going on or it’s going to kill you.”

  I smiled at Gray trying to reassure him, but he continued. “Did it ever occur to you that Risk used to use sex as a distraction before, and you enabled him to do the same thing last night?”

  I really hadn’t thought about it, but it made total sense. I could’ve been only a distraction to him, and it had meant the world to me. He had also been working so hard to make himself a better person, and I could’ve just knocked him back to square one with just one night. I was deep in thought when I heard Risk behind me.

  “You love me, huh?” I jumped and spun around. Crap! He just caught me talking to Gray again!

  “You heard that?” I said as I watched Risk quickly glance straight at Gray (although I’m sure he only saw a wall.) That’s when I realized what Gray told me about him was true. He knew someone was there, but his brain wasn’t making sense between what he knew and what he was taught to believe. I saw his internal struggle before he filed it away and smiled at me.

  “Maybe, instead of talking to your imaginary friend, you could talk to me now. I’ve caught you talking to the air more than you realize and it’s a little bothersome that someone nonexistent knows that you love me before I do.”

  Risk wrapped his arms around my waist as he talked and I noticed that he was still in only his boxers. My eyes devoured him as I remembered the feel of his mouth on my body just hours before. I would have taken him right then had it not been brought to my attention by my “imaginary friend” that Risk and I needed to have a conversation.

  “Gray isn’t my imaginary friend.” Gray stood triumphant as I defended his existence and Risk lowered his brow at me. “And we need to talk about last night.” Risks green eyes began to darken. He was obviously remembering our night as fondly as I had been.

  “Oh, did I do something wrong?” He teased. He wasn’t at all worried that he had done something wrong, he knew that what he did was so amazingly right. He smiled at me and I punched him in the arm.

  “Really Risk, was my enjoyment not clear to you? Everything was amazing, it’s just that…it was really special to me, and I don’t want to be just another distraction to you…” My voice faded and I watched my feet as I pushed a piece of fuzz on the carpet with my toe. Risk hooked a finger under my chin, bringing my eyes to his, and then he cupped my cheeks with both of his hands. His face was deadly serious.

  “What I felt last night, and right now, is like nothing I’ve ever been privileged enough to feel. You gave yourself to me and that’s not something that I take lightly. We started something last night Marlee, and it’s going to change who we are forever. I’m so in love with you, and I hope you feel the same way for me.
I know we haven’t known each other long, but I feel like we are two halves of a whole.”

  All I could do was stand there and soak in his beautiful words. Everything he had said was equally as true for me. I felt like I never knew what I was missing until that very first time Risk touched me and a fire was unleashed. I don’t know how long I stood there just staring and smiling before I heard Gray say, “Kiss him already!” and I planted a deep, love filled, toe curling kiss right on him. When I pulled away, we were both practically panting.

  “I hope your friend isn’t around right now, because that was hot!” Risk said teasingly.

  I looked around to find that Gray had left, and it seemed to me that Risk knew that he had gone, and maybe that’s why he made the comment in the first place. I knew it wouldn’t be long before the conversation about Gray would come up again and I would have to explain my abilities in detail, so I decided to go ahead and get it over with.

  “You know he’s gone, don’t you?” Risk look shocked at my question and for a moment I thought he might turn tail and run, but he didn’t. He just stood there silently staring at me like he was wondering what to say, or what I knew.

  “I’m not sure I understand what you’re asking me.” Risk said suspiciously.

  I smiled at him trying to put him at ease. “You feel things that you think you shouldn’t be feeling, right? Like there’s someone in the room that you can’t see or someone is staring at you? You can feel a difference in the air, coincidentally, when you see my interactions with my…friend, and you can tell when he isn’t around. Is that right?”

  I thought Risk was going to have a heart attack. His eyes were nearly bulging from his head and his mouth was hanging open. I gave him a moment to gather himself so that he could respond.

  “You know something’s wrong with me than…” He whispered so low that I could barely hear him.

  “Risk…that’s my secret. You feel them, but I can actually see or hear them. I think you’ve had the suspicion all along, but could never commit yourself to believe it because of what it meant about yourself. There’s nothing wrong with you, trust me. What I can do is the reason why the kids at school think I’m a freak. It scares them. It scares my mother, but it doesn’t scare you because, in the back of your mind, you’ve always known that they’re out there.”

  I’d just laid all my cards on the table and left myself completely vulnerable to Risk. The only other time I had ever told anyone about my abilities, my parents yelled at me and made me feel like I was lying. The seconds it took for Risk to respond seemed like hours, but I waited patiently as he gathered his thoughts to tell me what he thought about what I had just revealed about myself, and about him too.

  “Who’s your friend, Marlee?” He said with wide eyes. Gray appeared beside me again and asked what was going on after seeing the shift in the atmosphere. I took a deep breath and looked straight at Gray to explain to him what Risk and I were discussing.

  “I explained it to him exactly as you explained it to me, Gray.” I said and Risk looked bewildered as I spoke to the air.

  Gray must have sensed that I was confused about how to proceed because he nudged me and said, “Tell him what we are, and tell him he doesn’t need to be afraid.”

  I relayed Gray’s message and then decided that introductions may make things less awkward. “Gray this is Risk, and Risk I know you can’t see him, but this is Gray…my best, non-imaginary, friend. Gray says you shouldn’t be afraid. The things that I can see, and that you can feel are things that you have been taught your entire life are myths. Gray…is a ghost.”

  I saw Risk shiver. “That’s not possible Marlee, you have to know that something isn’t right…with you.” He looked sad as he lowered his gaze to his shaking hands. My confession had done exactly as I thought it would. It had made Risk think that I was crazy.

  “You can’t seriously think that about me, Risk.”

  He silently shuffled his feet and stared down at the floor. I tried my best to hold back my tears. I really thought that this was something that I could confide in him and he would believe me, especially after Gray explained to me that he had his foot in the door to the same abilities. I thought that in the very least he would sympathize with me and not try to make me feel mentally handicapped.

  Risk stood silently as I watched Gray reach up and touch his arm. Risk flinched just as Gray made contact and my tears stopped as I got excited over having the proof that I needed.

  “You feel that, don’t you? Gray just grabbed your arm.”

  Risk look scared and he grew visibly tense. “It feels like a tingle, not like someone has a hold of me.” He said and then he turned away from me. “I can tell when one of…them is around by a buzzing feeling on the back of my neck and I feel…nervous. If what it is doing now is touching my arm, than I guess that when they touch me it feels like that part of my body is asleep…. This can’t be right. It’s not normal.” I walked around him so that he was facing me. I could see how ashamed he was of himself and it hurt to see him that way. I put my hand to his cheek and his eyes lit up. “Tell it to touch my face!”

  “Gray is not an it, Risk. He’s my oldest and closest friend...more like a family member. We’ve been inseparable since before I can remember. Gray is a man, who doesn’t know how, but he’s dead. Gray isn’t even his real name. I named him Gray when I was little because I needed something to call him and the color of his aura was gray. And I don’t have to tell him anything for you. Tell him yourself, he’s standing right here.

  I looked at Gray and nodded and he raised his hand to touch Risk on the forehead. I saw Risks eyes get bigger as he felt Grays touch. He turned his face slightly towards me, trying not to move away from Gray’s touch, “How’s this possible?” he said and I just shrugged my shoulders and smiled. Risk smiled back at me and it sent warmth through my soul to see wonder in his eyes instead of fear.

  I looked over at Gray and was surprised to find him staring at Risk with his emerald eyes dazzling. “What’s wrong Gray?” I said aloud and he looked over at me with his wide sparkling eyes. “I can feel him too, Marlee. I can feel warmth from his body.”

  Gray had never been able to feel anything for as long as I had known him. No kind of touch could penetrate the barrier between our two worlds, or so I thought. Warmth, pain, cold, soft, hard, no kind of sensation that we take for granted on a daily basis was available to Gray for any kind of comfort before. I always thought that ghosts were made up of air, but this had changed everything that I had ever thought about them.

  Risk looked confused at my interaction with Gray. “What’s going on?” He asked. I could tell he was annoyed at having to be left out of our little supernatural circle.

  “Gray’s never been able to feel anything before since his death, but he said that he could feel the warmth from your body whenever he touched you.”

  Risk obviously didn’t think it was as big of a moment as Gray and I had because he just replied, “Cool.” With a big goofy grin on his face. There must be some kind of connection, either with Risks different abilities, or…something else. After all, I had never been able to feel Gray, but Risk could. After I chewed the thought over for a few minutes Risk said, “So how exactly is this dangerous? Gray is a friend, right?” Shit. Shit. Shit! I had only just introduced him to this world and I was already going to have to show him the ugly side of it before he even got a chance to fall in love with the beauty.

  “Well I don’t just see Gray, I see a lot of ghosts. Sometimes I help them so they aren’t stuck here in this world and they can cross over to wherever it is they’re supposed to go. The ghosts that are stuck here are often just confused or need a loved one to know how they feel about them, but some of them get really angry. You won’t be able to see it, but the angry ones look different. They have red eyes, for one, but they also give off a different energy so you may be able to feel the difference. Gray and I tried to help a boy not long ago that remembered his past as we were trying to get hi
m to cross over. I’m not sure what he remembered because he wouldn’t tell us, but he started to change and became one of the angry things.”

  Risk wasn’t smiling anymore, but he stayed quiet and nodded his head at me to continue.

  “Do you remember when you told me that I looked like I hadn’t slept in weeks?” Risk nodded again. “Well, apparently the boy has found a way to harvest energy from me using my connection to ghosts and the living. I’m not sure how he’s doing it, but Gray and I have been working on finding the boys dad, and we have. We’re going to figure out his story and we’re going to use it to help him.”

  “What does he need your energy for?” Risk asked and I was proud that he was keeping up with everything so well.

  “We aren’t sure yet but we do know that he can use the energy to move objects, that much he has shown us.” Risk slowly nodded his head as if he were deeply sifting through all of the information. When he finally spoke again he said, “Well…Let’s go find the dad!” He smiled nervously and Gray beamed at him.

  “Hold your horses buddy. I have to work tonight.” I laughed.

  Risk must have suddenly remembered something unpleasant because he scrunched his face up. “I have to go deal with my parents too. If I’m still alive tomorrow then we can go “dad searching.”

  Ugh. I’d forgotten all about what I had done to Risks mother. She was probably getting more pissed with each second that passed that Risk wasn’t there to be beat down. She was a strong willed monster of a person who definitely didn’t like it when things didn’t go her way. I was just going to have to trust that Risk could take care of himself. I had too many of my own issues to be constantly worrying about Risk too. I didn’t comment about his mother, I just laid my head on his chest and took in his scent while I still had time.