Paper Dolls [Book Five]
Page 21
I pulled away, resting my forehead on hers and trying to breathe. “Shit,” I let out. “I'll drive,” I said louder. I just wanted us to go.
It was probably good that my mom was present. If she hadn't been I might’ve just attacked Avery. I had little to no chill when it came to really wanting her. And Natalie had taught me a thing or two about the pros of being bold.
“Well, come out to the porch at least. Lemme get a picture,” my mom said.
I hadn't thought of that. I let my hand fall down onto Avery's stomach as my head dropped down onto her shoulder and I laughed.
I guess we were doing this then.
We followed my mom outside and stood next to each other, trying to be ourselves.
“No, not like that,” my mother laughed her dark laugh. “Just be normal.”
I sighed. Being normal was our secret, I thought. Not anymore.
I turned into Avery and looked at her like I had done only moments before. I touched my hand to her face and felt her holding my waist as I faced her.
“I think she wants us to kiss,” I said, searching her face and feeling hungry.
“No argument,” she whispered back, kissing me.
I felt my eyes close as she did it. Her arms tightened around my waist and I felt taken by her, carried. She hummed into me as my mom snapped away.
“Okay, good,” my mother said.
I exhaled as I pulled away and rest my forehead down on Avery’s, she was still holding me.
After that I heard a few more obnoxious snaps.
“Okay, no, that's perfect,” my mother laughed.
I laughed too and turned my head a little to face her.
As soon as I did she snapped again.
“Okay, stop!” I said, wanting her to be gone. I was too in love to be thinking about having parents.
“Have a nice night, you two,” my mother teased.
“K,” I said, definitely grateful that she was going. “Okay,” I said, turning back to Avery once my mom was out of earshot. “You look hot,” I said, placing my hands on her neck and tugging on her just a bit.
“Mmm, I tried to look as hot as you but impossible things are impossible.” Keeping her hands on my hips, she allowed me to tug at her.
“If we don’t get out of here right now I’ll have you naked in three seconds,” I said.
She really didn’t get it. She hardly ever wore dresses and when she did it made me go crazy.
“Oh, well, now I’m torn.” She said, running her hand over my stomach. I shuttered, a breath leaving me. “But I’m hungry so we better go,” she teased, letting her nails drag over the fabric of my dress.
“Let’s get outta here,” I said, leaning back while she held me. I liked the way she had me. She made me feel special.
“Lead on,” Avery said, stepping aside and letting me go in front.
She kept a hold on my hand as I walked us to the car.
“Any requests?” I asked.
“Italian. I’ve had the craving for chicken parm. I even dreamed about it,” she snickered.
“I already knew you wanted Italian, baby.” She’d told me that much.
“Yes, but I didn’t tell you that I wanted to bring some home for later because of the dream. Oh, and we need whipped cream and strawberries and chocolate. But yes, do me a favor?”
“Anything,” I replied.
“Kiss me,” she said.
“With pleasure,” I reminded, pushing her back against the car door and kissing her hard like I’d been meaning to do. I pushed at her waist with my thumbs while I did it. I wanted her to know how turned on I was, how much I’d been wanting to kiss her this way literally all fucking day.
After I struck, I softened and felt myself whimper inside her mouth.
“Fuck,” she murmured after I pulled away. “That gives me a very different hunger.” She bit her bottom lip and groaned. “You’re far too good at kissing me. I’m not sure I’ll survive the night.”
“Come on, then,” I said, staring down at her lips hungrily as I bit my own to keep myself occupied. I pushed off her body. I let my eyes move up and find hers as my fingers slipped down around the door handle and opened the door. “Get in.” I said, needing us gone.
I was excited to drink her in all night. I knew just the place.
She did, sliding into the seat and putting a hand on the car door to pull it closed but she stopped before she did.
“I mean it, Vi. You look so gorgeous tonight that I almost want to cry.” Her face was stone cold serious.
“You’re making me weak,” I warned, staring down at her body. I really couldn’t take it. She was so beautiful.
I walked around the door to return to her and squat down in front of her so that I could hold her hand. When I looked up I felt my eyes flicker. “We talk a lot about how we stress each other out,” I said. “But I don’t think you know how happy you make me… I don’t think you really know,” I said, looking up.
“You too,” she said, eyes shining. “You make me feel so alive and happy sometimes. I could never go back. I’m so glad you kissed me in the theater.”
“Going through all that stuff today alone and then being home with you just now… Those two things were like night and day… It’s almost like still, that was my old life and this is my new one. I can’t even explain it.”
If I talked any more I would probably cry.
“Anyway,” I said, standing on my tiptoes and kissing her forehead as I did. “Let's get you fed,” I laughed.
I shut her door and got in the car on my side, turning it on and hurrying to get us to food.
The restaurant I was taking her to was one she would love. Their whole mission was romance.
When we got there I used the valet and we were sat right away in the corner next to the windows that looked out off the cliff over the sea.
The lighting was deliciously dim inside the restaurant but the moon illuminated the dark surface of the ocean and the single candle in the center of our table produced just enough intimate light for me to see Avery’s beautiful face.
A man came by and wordlessly poured us some red wine.
Warm bread was brought out and a waiter poured a bit of olive oil and dark vinegar onto a small plate while coating it lightly with fresh ground coarse pepper.
I opened my menu and looked down on it quietly. It felt nice to be here like this, sitting across from her. It was almost like that first week of ours all over again but with a lot more gratitude and a lot less fear.
“I was-”
“I-”
We both laughed. We were about to talk and break the silence at the same time.
“You go,” I said.
“I was just going to say how great this place is and thank you for bringing me here.” She cleared her throat and lowered the menu. “It’s funny. I kind of feel like this is our first date except not. Is that weird?”
“I feel it too,” I said.
Maybe we’d broken some glass ceiling… How could we both be feeling this way on the exact same night?
It mesmerized me. I found it addictingly interesting.
“We didn’t really have much time for things like this, did we?” I asked, trying to make sense of it.
“No, it felt like we were always in crisis mode. We’re here now though. That’s what counts, right?”
She chuckled, hiding her mouth behind the menu. “If I’d known that me in dresses turned you on so much I’d have worn them more often, but there’s something to be said for not spoiling you.”
“You in anything turns me on,” I said. It was very very true. I was very very spoiled. I particularly loved her in her comfy sweats and workout wear but this dress was nice. Mostly I just loved that look on her face, that sort of lovesick look I’d been starving for before Napa.
“Good. Now, I don’t have to go buy more dresses,” she shrugged, hiding a smile. “Except a wedding dress.”
“I’d been meaning to ask you about that,�
� I said. I’d started to have confusion about what she wanted. I’d always pictured us in two dresses but what if she wanted me in a suit or the other way around? “Remember a long time ago when Clint asked us who wore the pants?”
It was a stupid question that instantly made me bust up laughing at the time. Avery had made a joke about Sarah, I remember. Something about Clint being the one in the dress. But she never really answered the question.
“Yeah?’ She narrowed her eyes. “What about it?”
“I’ve been meaning to ask you how traditional you want this wedding to be,” I took a sip of my wine and waited to see what she would say. “Do you want me to wear a suit?”
“Babe, I want you to wear whatever you want to wear. Whatever your heart desires. If that’s a dress, cool. If that’s a suit, also cool. The only thing off limits is going naked.” She made big eyes. “Your mom wouldn’t like that.”
“She might like that, you don’t know,” I laughed. “You didn’t see her checking me out earlier. It was weird. Between her reaction and yours I’m starting to wonder if I usually look like shit.”
“Wait, your mom checked you out?” Avery shook her head. “Was that weird? Cuz I feel like its weird,” she laughed. Her sideways smirk always slayed me.
“It was definitely weird. She made it seem like she’d never noticed I was a woman before. To be fair she doesn’t usually look at me much. It could’ve been the first time she’d actually let herself notice my body in the past few years.”
“Ah, well I’ll try not to remember that she was checking you out because… Well, I just don’t want to. But you’re always hot and I love you in anything. It’s just- the dress took me by surprise. I wasn’t expecting it. I thought we were just going to go out all casual. I’m glad though. I got to see you all dressed up.” I did wear something tight and black that left nothing to the imagination and also enhanced my cleavage. That was all just the rules of attraction though, wasn’t it?
The waitress came and we both ordered different things.
After she left I dipped a piece of the bread into the oil and tasted it. It was more than perfect; cool oil and the bite of the pepper on impossibly soft dough that tasted baked.
“Mmmm,” I hummed, my forehead scrunching from the intensity of the pleasure.
Avery copied me and ate her own bread, with a euphoric look on her face. As she swallowed she sighed and sat back.
“What do you want to wear anyway? For the wedding, I mean.”
“A dress, I guess,” I said. I was a dress person. I’d always been a dress person. I wondered sometimes if Avery really knew how little I cared about the actual specifics of this thing. I wanted to gift her this. The truth of it was important to me, the deed was important. The wedding itself only interested me because I knew she would like it. “I just want you to know we can make it your fantasy,” I said carefully. It was an odd thing to say and yet, I'd always thought certain girls loved their weddings for exactly that reason. Why lie?
The way Skylar dazed in the cafe today when she thought about the wedding, I’d seen Avery have that look before in our earlier talks. Some girls craved these events. I’d never been that person.
“Hmm, okay. I feel like we’re fulfilling hetero stereotypes right now,” Avery mumbled. “You’re so the guy who doesn’t really care as long as the wedding happens and I’m the girl who’s all about what kind of table decorations and flowers to have.” She couldn’t help but grin and let out a laugh.
“Yeah well, I mean, I would also be fine with you wearing a tux if that’s what you wanted,” I said. “I didn’t actually mean to imply that I thought I wore the pants…” I didn’t think that at all. We both wore dresses, we both wore pants… Okay, this was officially bothering me now. Why was it such a strange thing to ask? “You, more than anyone, know exactly how sappy and feminine I can be,” I reminded. My sap just never pertained to weddings and public shows.
“I know, babe. I’m just being silly. It’s really sweet that you want this to be perfect for me,” Avery smiled, adoring me. “I love that you feel that way. I just want it to be something small and, dare I say, not dramatic. I’m going to wear a dress for sure and I always assumed you would seeing as you’re way more of a dress girl than I am but I just want us to have a freaking amazing day where we get married. That's all I really ask for.”
“Okay,” I said. “And are we superstitious?” I wondered. Would we have to spend the morning apart? Hide our dresses? Hide ourselves?
“Eh, my mom would pretty much insist. She’s the superstitious one. She’d badger me about how I wouldn’t want my marriage to start out with a bad luck curse or whatever.”
“Aaaand I’m already dreading maybe having to be apart for a few hours on our wedding day…” I confessed, looking about the restaurant for the very first time. I drank a bit of wine and then turned back to see her anew.
“You never know. I might be able to convince her that we need to help dress each other. Something about that possibility makes me happy. Maybe I’m sappy and overly romantic but that transformation would be nice to watch. From casual Olivia to bride Olivia.”
She set her hand down and ran a finger along the side of my hand that had been resting on the white table-cloth.
A breeze of air came and hit my senses. Sweet, sexy, soft. The effect was all-encompassing, dizzying. “I can smell your perfume even over here,” she said. “And it’s making me crazy.”
When she touched me my heart raced. I had to try so hard to be still. My chest felt all warm and swimmy.
“You’re killing me tonight,” I realized, shaking my head. Usually when she was trying to hit on me it was all cheesy and cocky. This was so different. This was honesty and it more than lit my fire, it incinerated me.
“You killed me first so it’s only fair. I swear when I saw you standing with your mom I forgot she was there. I felt kind of bad ogling you in front of her but I couldn’t help it.”
“Yeah, we probably wouldn’t have made it out of that house if she hadn’t of forced us. I’m pretty sure about that.”
“We would have gotten dressed up only to get undressed in thirty seconds. I keep thinking about all the different ways to get rid of that dress later. It’s a good way to fill my head with even more Olivia.”
“Uh Oh… I am definitely in trouble,” I said, realizing it.
“Yep,” she said as the waitress came back with our food, setting it down and walking away again. For a second I hesitated. I didn’t want to move my hand away from Avery’s. For whatever reason, my heart was still beating a little too fast.
Reluctant, I picked up my fork and began to spin a bit of pasta around the prongs.
“I’ll try to remain calm,” I said, giving her a sly smile and taking a bite.
In truth, she did make me shake. With excitement though, not anything else.
The food was delicious.
“This is the best chicken parm I’ve ever had. I’m serious,” Avery said as she cut into another piece of chicken. “You want to try it?” She held it out on a fork and looked at me, with mischief in her eyes.
“Okay,” I said, swallowing nervously before opening my mouth and leaning in closer to her. She put the food into my mouth and watched as I drew it from the fork before letting out a little groan.
“You’re not even trying and you’re still making me wish we’d stayed home.”
I pulled away and let my eyes close as I sat back in the chair and tasted the delicious food.
“You’re right,” I said. “It is good.”
The way she looked at me was good.
The way she smiled…
After Napa, I was finally starting to feel like we were normal again, like she wasn't trying and she wasn’t slipping and this was finally just us again.
I let out a sigh and came back into her world.
“You can feed me all night if you’d like.”
“Happily.” She gave me another piece and watched me take it.<
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“So, we should make this a regular thing.”
“Which part?” I asked, searching her face openly. I liked all of it. Especially the feeding.
“Date night,” she answered.
“Okay,” I said. It was a healthy plan, a good plan. I just worried about things becoming routine or mandatory. A date night with both of us upset would be no fun and we both had mood swings.