by H Q Kingsley
“It’s fine, baby,” he said unconvincingly. “It’s all going to be fine, okay?”
The doctors’ rushed us through the set of double doors that led to the delivery ward. The nurses turned the gurney into the first room that was empty and quickly transferred me to the bed.
“Sir, we’re going to have to ask you to stand outside for a moment while we prepare your mate. You can come back in when we tell you.”
Elspeth’s expression hardened at those words, and I was afraid he would snap.
“Please, can he stay here… I need him,” I cried.
The nurse looked at me for a moment and sighed. She nodded and went to grab some garments that were in the nearest closet in the large room.
“Here, put this on,” she told Elspeth and handed the garments to him.
“I’ll be right here,” Elspeth said and released my hand so he could change into the hospital garments.
I rested my head back into the pillow and watched as the nurses scattered about.
“What’s happening?”
“There might be some complications with the baby. Your vitals look good, but the doctor will be able to tell you more,” the woman told me.
I swallowed past the lump in my throat. The thought of something wrong had me on edge, but the minute I sensed Elspeth’s calming aura and felt his hand tighten around mine, I looked up to see he had a hopeful gaze.
It had seemed like hope wasn’t something Elspeth could reach for, but every so often, I would see the light in his eyes. I knew that despite the darkness residing within him that he battled on a daily basis, he would keep fighting, for me...for our child.
“It’s going to be fine and so will you,” he said and leaned forward to kiss my forehead. “I’ll be right here.”
“And push!”
I yelled in agony as I tried to force the baby out of me. My legs were hiked in the air and the doctor was in between my legs.
My body was exhausted and I was sweating over every inch of my body, and my heart was pounding so hard that I could hear it in my ears.
“I can’t... I can’t keep... Elspeth, I’m so tired,” I told him, my head lulled to the side as I tried to keep looking at him. All I wanted to do was sleep.
Elspeth touched my cheek. “Come on, Sefa. You’re so strong, sweet wolf. You can do this.”
I nodded and put my strength into the next push.
“Just a few more pushes, you’re almost there,” the doctor encouraged.
I swallowed again and grabbed the edge of the bed with one hand and Elspeth’s hand with the other. I squeezed my eyes shut and gritted my teeth, crying out in pain as I continued to push.
“I see the head, keep pushing!” the doctor’s yelled.
Wanting nothing more than to hear the sounds of my child, I pushed every time I was told to.
After one last big push—finally—a child’s cry erupted in the room.
“It’s a boy!” the doctor called out.
I fell back onto my pillow and breathed out a sigh of relief, glad that it was over. I looked over to my left to see Elspeth was reaching out for the baby—our baby boy—but before I had the chance to see him that, the sharp pains resumed, hitting me like a ton of bricks.
I cried out, waving away the baby as Elspeth leaned him out to me.
The pain was too intense, shooting through every part of my body until my blood rushed in my ears.
“Aghhh!” I screamed, feeling myself stretch as something else tried to push through.
“Doctor, what’s wrong?” Elspeth asked, panic in his voice.
The doctor leaned forward, “There’s… there’s another head crowning.”
“What?” Elspeth said right before I screamed again, feeling myself being ripped in half for the second time.
“Get it out! Get it out! Please, get it out!” I cried, uncertain if I would live through delivering a second child. The first hadn’t exactly been the most pleasant experience.
I yelled out in pain as fat tears rolled down my cheeks. I shook my head. “I can’t. I can’t,” I cried.
Elspeth moved closer to me, showing me out little boy. “You can. Look at this beautiful little guy.” He reached out to grip my hand. “Sefa, you can do this. Just a little bit more now.”
I continued to push out the second child and a cry erupted just as loud as the first as I gave my last and final push.
“Another boy!” the doctor shouted.
I rested my head back on the pillow exhausted and feeling like I could pass out any moment. But I still wanted to see my children: My two boys.
Elspeth brought the first child to me and nuzzled him into my arms and the nurse brought the second child once he was cleaned off a little.
I took the little ones in my arm and the two babies cooed, looking at me as if they knew who I was already.
“Do you have names for them?” Elspeth asked, leaning into me, kissing my forehead and moving my hair away from my face.
“Lucian,” I said gesturing to the baby with bright gray eyes, almost as bright as silver. “That was the only name I had picked for certain.” I looked up into Elspeth’s eyes. “Is there any name that is special to you, love?”
Elspeth stood there for a moment looking at our yet unnamed baby before he looked back down at me, a shy smile on his face. “My grandfather’s name was Cain.”
“And Cain,” I said to the hazel-eyed baby boy in my arms.
“We did it... We did it, Elspeth,” I said, feeling weak and sleepy, and utter and completely thrilled.
“Yes, we did,” Elspeth said and rested his forehead against mine. “I love you, Sefa.”
I smiled and kept my child closer to my body.
“Always.”
Excerpt of Kinkdom
Antwon
I brushed back Karlyle’s bangs to place a kiss on his forehead. He was adorable when he slept, his face mushed into the pillow and his bright-pink lips puffy with sleep.
After seven and a half years, I still thought he was one of the most handsome men I’d ever seen. How many people could say that? How many people could honestly look at their spouse and think, damn, I landed a hottie?
He groaned and caught my hand as I tried to step away from the bed. “Where are you going so early?” he asked, his voice groggy with sleep.
“Quinn needs a ride to work this morning. I’m going to drop him off before Greyson.”
He groaned again. “You should tell him to take the train. Both of them.”
I smiled. “I should, but I won’t.”
He kissed the back of my hand before he let me go. “I know you won’t. It’s why I love you.”
“I love you too,” I whispered as I walked to the door.
“Wait, babe!” Karlyle propped himself up on his elbows to look at me. His salted, dark hair was matted to his face on one side and his grey eyes glimmered against the white of our bedspread. His lips turned up at the corners as he looked at me. “Happy birthday! I’ll be here tonight to celebrate. Promise.”
I grinned back at him, wondering if he really would be there when I got home from work. He’d never missed a birthday before, but things were different lately. He was more important now. Busier. “Thank you,” I said, reaching for the handle on the bedroom door. “I’ll bring home something special. We should celebrate you too, Mr. Top-Five Surgeon.”
Karlyle’s face lit up, but his eyes seemed far away. “Sounds good, babe.”
I nodded, pushing out of the door with a soft sigh. There seemed to be so much unsaid between us lately and it was getting harder and harder to convince myself that it was due to his hectic schedule. Harder and harder to convince myself not to check his phone when it buzzed at two in the morning. Harder and harder to ignore that he smelled like lavender soap after a long day at the office.
I shook my head, pushing away the thoughts before I let them gnaw at me yet again. It was my birthday. If I wanted to drive myself crazy about my marriage, it’d have to wait unt
il tomorrow.
I trudged down the hallway, feeling antsy about getting a cup of coffee in me. My entire body felt like dead weight. I was a nine-to-five kind of guy. Getting Quinn to work by six thirty and Greyson to school by seven was going to require at least three shots of caffeine.
Dragging my feet, I rounded the corner to the kitchen.
“No, I’m for real. Ask your dad. I scored mad pussy in high school.”
I furrowed my eyebrows as I watched Quinn excitedly recap his teenage escapades to my son.
It was way too damn early. “I don’t know how this conversation started,” I said with a sigh as I made my way to the coffee maker. “But don’t talk to my son about your sex life. Past or present.”
Quinn’s bright blue eyes rolled as he ran a hand through the tousle of strawberry curls wildly brushed on top of his head. I never knew what kind of look Quinn was going for. It was too upscale to be hipster and too messy to be classy. But whatever it was, he did not look like a teacher. If I’d met him on the street, I’d guess he was an artist of some kind, obscure and brooding.
“Look at this kid.” He smacked his hand on Greyson’s shoulder. “He’s like a Friday Night Lights cliché. You really think he’s not getting laid?”
I put my fingers to the bridge of my nose. Way. Too. Fucking. Early. “Don’t talk to me about my son’s sex life either. Honestly, Quinn, I can’t even believe some of the things I have to say to you.”
Quinn pursed full, pouty lips. “Wow, you’re in a mood this morning. The one-pump wonder couldn’t get it up for a morning romp?”
“Quinn!” I snapped, stilling for a moment and hoping his voice didn’t carry. Karlyle and I had enough problems.
You’d think after thirty-plus years, I’d have learned not to tell Quinn all of my secrets. He had no filter and didn’t seem to understand the concept of “between you and me.”
The coffee maker beeped, and I slowly poured an obscene amount into my thermos. “Okay, let’s go,” I said, screwing on the top.
I turned to see the surprised look on Greyson’s face as he bit halfway into a pancake.
Quinn let out a huff of air. “We’re eating breakfast,” he whined, shoving a piece of bacon into his mouth. “What’s the hurry?”
“The hurry is you’ve annoyed me. I’m annoyed and I still have an hour of traffic to sit in with you, so you lost the right to breakfast.”
I took a long drink from my cup as I moved for the front door, sighing in satisfaction even though it burned off all of my taste buds.
“But, Dad, what about me? I didn’t do anything!” Greyson’s soft brown eyes flickered over to me.
“That’s the price of family. You can eat breakfast at school. Thank your uncle.”
Greyson grimaced. “I hate school breakfast. Everything is vegan and gluten-free.” He shoved the rest of his pancake into his mouth, tipping a bottle of syrup to his lips after.
I pulled open the front door. “Good. Sounds fancy. For what we pay in tuition, they should serve it on gold plates. Now, get moving.”
Greyson grumbled something through a mouthful of food as he slid off the barstool with his backpack.
Quinn sighed as he followed suit, climbing off his chair and heading for the front door, both leaving their mess behind for me to clean up later. I rolled my eyes. I’d demanded they get moving, but I’d thought at least one of them would have put his plate in the sink.
As we made our way to the car, I smiled at the oversized gift in the driver’s seat. “What is this?” I pulled open the door to grab the wrapped orange and yellow box.
“Happy birthday, Dad.” Greyson grinned from ear to ear at me. His eyes sparkled with pride and, even though he was nearly an adult, I saw him just as I had the first day I’d seen him. In my eyes, he was still that sweet six-year-old boy looking up at me, asking me to love him.
I sniffed as my eyes watered. “Son,” I squeaked, my throat tightening with emotion. I extended my arms, inviting him into them.
He rolled his eyes as he moved into my embrace. “All right, Dad. It’s just a birthday present. It’s standard practice. Don’t make a whole thing out of it.”
“Right.” I blinked back the tears welling in my eyes. “Forty is about the age that a man should stop crying in public.”
Greyson chuckled as he pulled out of my arms. “Probably,” he agreed as he yanked open the door to the back seat and slid in.
I grabbed my gift and set it in the back with him. “I’ll open it tonight with Karlyle’s.”
As I climbed in behind the wheel, I glanced over at a very guilty-looking Quinn.
“My gift is still in the mail,” he said.
Laughing, I nodded. “Well, I won’t hold my breath while I wait for it.”
Quinn wasn’t that friend. He wasn’t the friend who remembered birthdays or bought you thoughtful Christmas gifts, or even the friend who would remember to pick you up from the airport. But that wasn’t the kind of friend I needed. I needed the kind of friend who would hitchhike to Mexico because I was having an episode and no one else could get through to me. And that’s who Quinn was. He was always there when I needed him. He’d follow me to hell if I asked, but he wouldn’t bring a Christmas gift.
“So, does that mean there’s a party tonight at yours? I sort of promised Bobbi I’d stay home tonight.”
I shook my head. “Not at all. We’re just going to have dinner. Nothing special. You should stay at your place. Honestly, I see you way too much for someone who allegedly moved out a year ago.”
Quinn let out an exasperated breath. “Please, you love seeing me.”
“I never said I didn’t. But…” I turned to him as I pulled up to a red light. “Bobbi is madly in love with you. It’s far time you decide if it’s mutual.”
Quinn frowned, and I could see it in his eyes—he’d been thinking the same thing. He’d been stringing Bobbi along for the better part of two years. He cleared his throat with a nod. “I know,” he said softly.
I reached out to place my hand on his shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze as I left him to his thoughts. I knew Quinn; he wasn’t intentionally misleading Bobbi. Hell, he probably had no idea why the man was so in love with him, but Quinn had a knack for not knowing what he wanted. In most instances, it made him kind of fearless. Who else but Quinn could be a teacher by day and a bartender by night? But in other instances, it left him as the bad guy breaking someone’s heart.
I turned up the radio to fill some of the silence as we made our way through traffic. Only the sounds of MC Lyte and Greyson’s constant texting floated through the car until we pulled up to Quinn’s elementary school.
“Thanks for the ride,” he said as he climbed out of the car. “Happy birthday, bro!” He turned his gaze to the back seat. “Stay out of trouble,” he said mockingly.
“Always.” Greyson grinned after him as he headed toward the building.
“Why don’t you hop up here,” I said, patting the empty passenger seat.
Greyson gazed skeptically back at me before he stepped out of the car with a sigh. He opened the passenger door and plopped in.
“Cool, cool,” I said, as I pulled away from the curb, trying my best to be casual.
“Dad, it’s cool,” Greyson said with a groan.
“Huh? What’s cool?”
“Quinn said that I’m getting laid and you’ve been freaking out about it ever since, right?”
I blinked over at him before turning my eyes back to the road. “Uh, well, yeah.” Jesus, the kid was too smart for his own good.
“I’m not having sex, Dad,” Greyson said calmly.
I slowly nodded my head, trying to collect my thoughts. My own father hadn’t been around when I was Greyson’s age, and I was determined to be better. “Are you…sure?”
Greyson chuckled. “Yeah, I’m pretty sure I’d know.”
I laughed. “Fair point.” I sucked in a breath. “Okay. Good. Because you know you can talk to me if you’re thin
king about—”
“I know, Dad. But I’m not. I’m fine.”
I cringed. Could that really be true? What teenage boy wasn’t thinking about having sex? Especially my teenage boy. He was smart, charming, and handsome. I shook my head. Was I actually upset that my sixteen-year-old wasn’t getting laid? I was losing my goddamn mind.
“So, you’re not even considering it?” I asked, wondering why the hell I was pushing it. “Because you know you can talk to me about…if something else is going on too.”
Greyson groaned. “I’m not gay either, if that’s where this is going.” I opened my mouth, and he cut me off. “Or questioning, or anything else you’re about to hint at. I’m just not interested in the girls at my school.”
“Oh.” I nodded, considering whether I should circle back around to the gay thing. I hadn’t been interested in any of the girls at my school either. I looked over at him as I pulled into a line of traffic.
“Don’t look at me like that,” Greyson protested. “Look, I love you, Dad, and I love Karlyle, but you guys sent me to a private school that’s very, very rich and very, very white.”
“Ah,” I said, some of the pieces falling into place.
“I’m the adopted black athlete. Every girl in my class at best thinks of me as a prop to mess with daddy and at worst, a sideshow act, which doesn’t exactly make me want to bone.”
I held up my hand. “Got it.”
“Great. Can we be done talking about this?”
“Yes.” I shook my head as I let out a breath, pulling into the drop-off line. “Well…”
Greyson groaned. “Dad, no! It’s too early.”
“No, this isn’t about the sex thing, it’s just…your two red-headed uncles? That was my family. Someone as dark as me, standing next to them growing up… Well, we just all have our crosses to bear. It takes a while to find your place in the world, Grey.” I grinned at him. “And I found mine in a Brooklyn brownstone, so I’d say I did pretty good, huh?”
Greyson laughed. “Yeah.” He met my eyes. “Thanks, Dad.”
“Anytime.”
