Somebody to Love

by Danielle Burton

  A sigh of relief eased the pain clenching my heart. He thought I was cool? “Really?”

  “Yeah, you think I can see it sometime?”

  I bit down on my lip to keep the excitement out of my voice. “If you want.”

  “I definitely want.”

  I had to suppress a squeal.

  The line grew silent for a minute, so I repeated the question he’d asked me. “What are you doing?”

  “At the park, lying on the hood of my car, watching the sunset. It’s beautiful. I wish you were here to watch it with me.”

  “Me too.”

  More silence. I didn’t know what to say this time.

  “Hey…I’m sorry about last night. I would’ve come over to say hi…”

  “You were busy working, I understand.”

  “I’m glad you do, but…I don’t ever want to be too busy for you.”

  My heart was beating so fast it hurt.

  We sat in silence for a long while. I was quiet because I didn’t know what to talk about. I’m not sure why he was. I liked our silence though. It was like we didn’t need words. It didn’t feel weird or awkward. All I felt was him. Which was odd since he was miles away.

  “Kirby, I…”

  “Yes, Keem?”

  He released a long breath. “What are you doing for Halloween? I’m taking my younger siblings trick-or-treating. Wanna come?”

  “Yes,” I said through a smile.

  “Cool. Maybe after we could watch some scary movies. You like scary movies?”

  “Not really. I don’t like to see people die.”

  “Oh, okay. Well, we can watch something else then.”

  “What about Hocus Pocus? I think it’s on Netflix.”

  “Hocus Pocus it is.”

  We talked a few minutes before saying goodnight. It would’ve been longer if Raina hadn’t texted telling me it was time to come in because it was a school night. I couldn’t wait to live on my own so I’d be the only person in charge of me.

  I couldn’t be too upset though. Not with Keem’s voice still in my head and thoughts of spending non-studying time with him. Usually Esme and I would hang out on Halloween, bingeing on Disney Halloween specials because I refused to attend the parties she always begged me to go to. I’m sure she’d be okay with a change of plans though. At least, I hoped.

  ~ ♥ ~

  “You don’t have to keep asking if I’m sure, Kirb. I told you it as fine. Besides, now I don’t have to feel guilty about ditching you to go to a costume party.”

  I looked up from the creepy mask I’d been frowning at and turned that frown to her. “Hey! You were gonna ditch me?”

  “Only after you fell asleep.” She flashed a smile, batting her lashes at me then hugged me sideways. “Love ya.”

  I stuck out my tongue at her.

  We both laughed as we moved to another aisle in the Halloween themed store. I still had almost two weeks to find a costume but wanted to get it now before all the good ones were gone. The only problem was, I couldn’t decide what I wanted to be.

  Esme kept not so subtly offering me sexy costumes in the likes of cops, nurses, and vampires, but I was nowhere near bold enough to wear anything like that. Not to mention Keem and I would be around children, I reminded her.

  She peeked around the aisle, handing another to me.

  I took one look at the photo of a girl in a bralette…thing and a short skirt and handed it back.

  “Come on, it’s barely different than a real cheerleading outfit.”

  “That’s because real ones are skimpy too,” I replied. “Plus, it’s supposed to be cold on Halloween. I’ll freeze,” I glanced around then lowered my voice, “or get frost bite on my boobs.”

  She roared with laughter, drawing the attention of a few other customers.

  I rolled my eyes at her then giggled too.

  Goofing around with Es had always been my favorite thing. She got me like no one else did and was truly the best friend anyone could wish for. We’d never even had a fight.

  “You’re so picky,” she said, coming around the aisle to stand beside me.

  “Am not. I just want to find the perfect costume.”

  “For Keem?” she sang, wiggling her brows.

  My gaze went to the floor. “No.”

  She kissed her teeth. “You’re not a great liar, ya know?” She nudged my shoulders. “It’s okay to want to look nice when you’re with him, just…” She stopped and faced me, waiting for me to do the same. “Don’t drive yourself crazy trying to decipher everything. I know I said to pay attention to his actions, but sometimes it’s okay to just enjoy yourself and not think too hard. In the words of the great Toni Braxton, let it flow.”

  We giggled together, and I nodded. “I’ll try.”

  Keem’s assigned text tone rang in my pocket and a little jolt went through my heart as always.

  Keem: Hey, Sunshine. What you up to?

  I smiled at his usual greeting and an idea formed in my mind. Grabbing Esme’s hand, I made a beeline for the exit. “Let’s go to the craft store. I know the perfect costume!”

  Chapter Seventeen

  ~ Haikeem ~

  One of the good things about having younger siblings is you got to continue the joy of trick-or-treating well past ‘aging out’. Though now that I was six-foot-two with facial hair I didn’t get much candy, if any. It was still enjoyable to watch them have fun.

  Savannah had tried to act as if she was getting too old for the festivities and couldn’t care less, but there was no denying the excitement in her eyes when I’d helped her pull together her costume. She was going as a character from one of her favorite animated films. Tip, from Home.

  We’d watched it together so she could make sure we got the look just right. Doing so had made me think of Kirby and her love for animation. I wondered if it were a movie she enjoyed. I liked it for its diversity. It wasn’t often you got a kid film with a Black girl as the main character.

  I’d already been looking forward to the night seeing that this was one of the last times I’d get to enjoy this aspect of the spooky holiday until I had kids of my own. I was more excited now that Kirby would be joining us. She’d voiced her excitement over the past couple weeks as well.

  I tried not to be but couldn’t help my nervousness. This was the first time we’d be spending outside of the library since our disaster of a date. Though maybe that wasn’t the right word. If not for the events that unfolded that night I may have walked away from her without learning her truth. Or worse, let my lower self get the best of me and done something I couldn’t ever take back.

  Without that night I may not have realized how special she was. How though I didn’t deserve her, I needed her in my life. A bright spot to shine through the storm clouds that liked to follow me around.

  Disaster was definitely the wrong word because without that night I may have continued with the behavior that was tearing me up inside. She’d saved me and didn’t even know it.

  I smiled as I walked the hall to her friend’s dorm with Savannah and Taylor in tow. Tay an I had both gone with an X-Men theme. He’d chosen Deadpool and I’d gone with Black Panther. I had no idea what Kirby was dressing as. She told me it was a surprise and refused to give me any hints, even when I’d given her my best puppy dog eyes. All she’d done was blush and shake her head.

  “What kind of name is Kirby?” Taylor asked when I reached the door.

  I frowned at him as I knocked. “A nice one, now shh.”

  When the door opened I was immediately taken in by the sight of her. Looking her over, I smirked. “I’d have never guessed you were going as the Statue of Liberty.”

  The smile she’d been wearing melted away. “I’m not–”

  My laughter stopped her words. “I’m joking.” In her all yellow outfit and the DIY crown on her head with yellow foam spikes jutting out all around, her costume was obvious. “I see you chose to go as my sunshine. I like it.”

  My w
ords were met with a wide-eyed expression. “Your?”

  Damn. I hadn’t meant to say that part aloud. I couldn’t help but feel that way though, that her golden rays shined only on me.

  I tried to think of a way to clean up my slip of tongue but came up with nothing. “Ready to go?”

  Those Bambi eyes of her stayed on mine for a moment as she chewed her lip. Then finally she nodded and her smile returned.

  Esme stepped out behind her dressed in a skimpy pirate costume and shut the door. “I’m out of here, too. Off to get my drank on.”

  Kirby’s eyes went wide again. The expression differed from the one she’d given me though. No blush or cute lip chewing. “Es, you’re not old enough.”

  Her friend rolled her eyes. “Basically no one in College is, Kirb. That’s the point.” She smiled and pecked Kirby’s cheek. “Later, baby doll.”

  She waved at me then was off.

  Taylor’s prepubescent eyes watched her as she sashayed down the hall and I shook my head.

  When I faced Kirby, she was frowning. “I wish she wouldn’t drink,” she said with her arms folded. Her eyes went to Tay and Savannah as if just noticing them and a shy smile lit up her face. “Hi.”

  Savannah eased closer to me. She didn’t always do well with meeting new people. By Kirby’s fidgeting and downcast gaze, I could tell she didn’t either.

  Taylor’s always outgoing self looked Kirby up and down. “That’s a lot of yellow.”

  Kirby’s eyes went to me and Savannah leaned against me, hugging my arm.

  “Kirby, this is my sister Savannah and my brother Taylor. Ya’ll, this is Kirby.”

  Taylor gave a nod. “What’s up?”

  Savannah said nothing.

  I extended my free arm for Kirby to take so we could get going.

  She hesitated to look at Savannah and then me again. My smile must have assured her since she took it and leaned against my other side. With my two favorite girls tucked safely beside me, we left the dorms to begin our night of Halloween fun.

  * * *

  This was unexpected.

  It had started with Kirby and Savannah complementing each other on their costumes. Turned out Home was Kirby’s favorite animated film. I think it had to do with she and the main character sharing an actual home. She’d mentioned before how much she missed Barbados.

  Close to an hour into our candy collecting, they’d broken away from our little group, walking a couple feet ahead. There was no conversation, they just shared each other’s company in silence. On the way to the next neighborhood, Kirby had chosen to ride in the back with Savannah instead of beside me. I would’ve been jealous if I weren’t so glad for my little sis to be connecting with someone outside of her tiny circle which mostly consisted of immediate family.

  I could hear them talking softly through the radio and Taylor’s excited rambling about how he’d made a killing in the short time we’d been out.

  Not too long after, their light, girly giggles filled the car. Who knows what they were talking about.

  Now, with our trick-or-treating done, I watched them from the doorway of Savannah’s room as she happily showed Kirby her butterfly collection. Not real ones, but everything they were depicted on, from stickers, to post cards, to mugs, figurines and more. Savannah was pretty much obsessed with the things. Her face lit up when Kirby told her about a butterfly puzzle she’d done.

  Call me a softy, but two girls lost to the world finding one another pulled at my heart strings. I hoped their blossoming friendship would continue. Savannah had overcome a lot in her life but making friends still didn’t come easy. I had a feeling Kirby, being older and wiser could be beneficial to her development as she neared adulthood. And for Kirby, although she had Esme who was no doubt a ride or die friend, it might be good for her to have someone around she could better relate to.

  “Hey, sorry to break up the fun, ladies, but the food is here.” We’d ordered from the local pizza place. Barbecue chicken pizza for Taylor and me, and salads for the girls.

  Savannah had gone vegan a year ago when she’d watched a documentary about the treatment of farm animals. She’d cried so long and hard she made herself sick. Or it could’ve been from watching baby animals get slaughtered. Whatever the case, Mom had cursed me out for letting her watch it and Savannah hadn’t eaten meat since.

  I wondered if something similar was the reason for Kirby’s vegan lifestyle. I’d have to ask her about it one day.

  After dinner we sat in the living room with Hocus Pocus playing. I was the only one really paying attention to it. Taylor lay stretched out on the floor stuffing his face with candy, and the girls sat crossed legged sorting through their haul and giving him everything that wasn’t vegan friendly.

  The movie was half over when Kirby sat beside me on the couch. She taken off her sun crown, so looking at her you couldn’t tell she was in costume.

  I smiled at her and she returned it.

  “Hi.”

  “Hey, Sunshine.”

  She’d taken the spot between me and the TV. I found myself watching her instead of it.

  The movie ended and not ready for the night to end, we all decided on another kid-friendly film. An hour later, Savannah and I were the only survivors of the sandman.

  Tay was still stretched on the floor and Kirby lay curled up next to me, her head resting on the arm of the couch.

  While Savannah left the room, presumably headed to the bathroom, I stretched then grabbed the throw from the back of the couch and draped it over Kirby.

  I watched her sleep for a minute, fists tucked under her chin. The first time I’d seen her I’d thought she was close to perfection. I knew now that she far surpassed that. It was almost funny how close within and yet how far out of reach she was. I laid my head back and sighed.

  I looked over at Savannah when she sat beside me. “You should get to bed, Banana. It’s late.”

  There was that inevitable eye roll. “I will in a minute.” She looked over at Kirby and smiled. “Your girlfriend is really pretty. And nice.”

  “She’s not…we’re just friends.” I glanced down at Kirby. “But yeah, she is very pretty.”

  “And nice,” Savannah added.

  “And nice.” And sweet, and adorable, and perfect, and…everything.

  “Night, Keem.”

  Savannah kissed my cheek then scurried off to her room.

  I stood, stretching again, then woke Tay as best I could and led him to his bed. I cleaned up his candy and hundred empty wrappers before settling down beside Kirby again. I thought about waking her to drive her back to Esme’s dorm, but I wasn’t ready for her to leave me just yet.

  ~ ♥ ~

  “Keem. Keem!”

  Someone shook me hard and I jumped out of my sleep. I squinted up at the person them rubbed my eyes to clear them. “Dad? What time is it?”

  “Three in the morning.” That answer hadn’t come from him, but my mom who stepped out of the shadows like some demonic entity, scowling at me. “What did I tell you about company in my house Haikeem?”

  I shot a quick glance over at Kirby where she still slept peacefully with the blanket covering most of her face. “We fell asleep watching a movie, that’s it.”

  She gave me a skeptical look like she didn’t believe a word I was saying, then clicked on the too bright table lamp and crossed her arms. “Wake your little friend up and tell her it’s time to go.”

  I didn’t waste time doing what she said. I was just barely back in her good graces and was sure that was about to change.

  “Sunshine.” I shook her gently. “Sunshine, wake up.”

  She groaned groggily and pulled the blanket down enough to look at me. “Keem?”

  “Hey, sleepy head. We gotta go.”

  I watched her stretch out her body and yawn. Her eyes flitted around the room, a confused look on her face. In her half sleep haze, she must’ve been wondering why she was waking up in an unfamiliar setting.

 
“Kirby? Kirby Ashford?”

  Now I was confused. I turned to my mom and frowned. “You know Kirby?” When I looked back to Kirby, her eyes were wide.

  “Mrs. Lovelace?” she was up from the couch in an instant with her arms wrapped around my mom.

  What the hell… “Um…anybody gonna explain?”

  My dad shrugged, looking too tired to really care. They’d gone to a Halloween party that my dad hadn’t really been too interested in. He’d complained that he was getting too old to party. My mom on the other hand, thirteen years his junior, had been excited to go. And of course, he’d given in because he loved her beyond words and always did whatever he could to keep her happy.

  My mom pulled Kirby away from her and looked her over. “You’ve grown into such a beautiful young woman. How have you been, sweetie?”

  “Good.” Kirby smiled.

  I was still scratching my head over the matter as I stood. “Um…” I looked between the two, waiting for an explanation.

  Kirby was the first to turn her attention to me. “Mrs. Lovelace was my sixth-grade teacher.”

  “Ohhh.”

  My mom sent an even harder scowl my way. “I had no idea you knew my knuckle headed son,” she said to Kirby.

  Kirby giggled and nodded. “Keem is my friend. We study together. He invited me to go trick-or-treating with him.”

  “Then,” I interjected, “we watched a movie and fell asleep.”

  My mom ignored me. “It’s late sweetie,” she said to Kirby. “Go back to sleep, Keem will drive you home in the morning.”

  Kirby nodded, already in the middle of a yawn. “Okay, Mrs. Lovelace. Goodnight.”

  “Goodnight sweetheart.”

  Kirby settled back down on the couch and my mom turned a lethal gaze on me. “You,” she pointed then curled her finger then turned and headed to the back of the house.

  I sighed and followed for my reprimanding.

  She closed the kitchen door behind us and leaned against the counter. My dad stood beside her looking like he might fall asleep on his feet.

  My mother’s nostrils were flared, and she had a hard glare trained on me. I’d seen her angry plenty of times, but something about this one was different. “Haikeem Alexander Lovelace, don’t you dare.”