Nachos & Hash

by Brandon Witt

  He was his mother’s son. Though he wasn’t sure how long he’d be able to keep any walls up. It felt like they were crumbling faster than he could attempt to rebuild them.

  “Oh, this is my favorite.”

  Darwin looked around. They’d just passed a nearly Olympic-sized pool filled with lily pads and stepped into a sweeping meadow of grasses framed by a creek lined with trees. “Really?”

  “Yeah, it’s so peaceful. It looks like a painting.”

  “Huh. I guess it does. Have you ever been to Missouri? Or the Ozark part of Missouri, anyway?”

  Cody shook his head.

  “This is what it reminds me of. I wasn’t as desperate to get away from home as you were, at least not toward the end, but that’s what this reminds me of.”

  “Wow, be glad you didn’t grow up where I did.”

  Darwin figured that was true in every way possible. He thought he’d gone through some shit growing up, but from the little Cody had said, Darwin’s life couldn’t begin to compare. At least not in the same ways. “Actually, before we go on, back by the lily pond there was a snack stand. Do you want a drink or something?”

  “No, I’m good. But you can get something if you want.”

  Darwin started to reply, but his phone vibrated in his pocket. “Oh no.”

  “What?”

  Darwin cringed as he pulled out his phone. “I think I know who this is.” He checked the screen. “Yep.” He couldn’t believe her. He held the phone so Cody could see the image on the screen. “So I told my folks about you the other night and mentioned our date. Mom said she was going to call and FaceTime so she could meet you. She’s struggling since I moved out of state and feeling like she’s missing out on my life. I didn’t think she’d actually do it.”

  Cody looked down at the screen and then back up at Darwin. “You told your mom about me?”

  Darwin nodded. “Yeah. Sorry.” The phone quit ringing. He motioned back toward the snack stand. “Don’t worry about it. I’ll call her tonight. And I’ll remind her that she’s insane. What mother calls during her kid’s date?”

  He started to walk off, then turned around when Cody didn’t follow. “What is it?”

  “I’ll meet her.” Cody paled, belying his carefree tone. “I wish my mom would be interested in who I’m dating. Call her back.”

  “Seriously?”

  “Yeah. Call her back.”

  “Okay.” He glanced around and then pointed toward a wooden bench by the stream. “Let’s go over there. It’s under a tree, so there’ll be shade.”

  They walked over and took a seat.

  Darwin pulled out his phone and looked at Cody once more. “You sure about this?”

  “Sure. Just call her.”

  He hit the FaceTime option on his mom’s name. The phone didn’t even ring twice. His beautiful mom’s face filled the screen, her brown eyes bright with mischief.

  “Hi, Mom. You called.”

  She laughed. “I sure did.” She motioned over her shoulder. “Get over here and quit being such a baby.” A huge Saint Bernard barreled over, running into her and causing the view to go askew. “Oh, not you, Sniffles. Craig! Get over here.”

  Cody let out a soft giggle.

  By the time his mom had gotten the phone recentered, his dad’s face was there too. “Hi, Darwin. You can blame your mom for this.”

  “I’ve no doubt, Dad. I can’t believe she actually did this.”

  His mom broke in before he could continue. “Okay, sweetie. I love you, but you’re not why I called, and if you don’t want me to take too much time, then give me what I want.”

  Darwin cast a questioning glance Cody’s way.

  Cody nodded.

  “Okay. Mom, Dad, this is Cody. It’s our second date, and you both just made it as awkward as humanly possible.” He passed the phone to Cody. He could hear his dad reiterating that he had nothing to do with it.

  Cody waved at the screen. “Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Michaels. It’s nice to meet you.”

  The sight of Cody waving at his parents crumbled any of Darwin’s remaining walls. He barely paid attention to what was being said, instead watching Cody. He seemed nervous, but his smile was bright and his voice respectful. Like he was actually meeting Darwin’s parents face-to-face. Which, Darwin supposed, he was.

  His dad only said a couple of things, and then his mom carried the conversation. She did a good job of keeping it short, asking things he’d already told her about Cody. How long he’d lived in Denver, what he did for work, if he was afraid when he was diving.

  Though Cody was soft-spoken, he wasn’t as shy or awkward as Darwin would have predicted. Not nearly as much as he would’ve been if the roles were reversed.

  “Well, Cody, darling, you are just lovely. If you’ll hand the phone back to my son, I’ll leave you two alone.”

  “Okay. It was very nice to meet you, Mrs. Michaels.”

  “You too, Cody.”

  Darwin took the phone, twisted it, and looked down into the screen. “Happy, Mom?”

  She smiled. “Yes, dear. Very happy.” She gave a silent nod of approval.

  Darwin was a little surprised. His mom was extremely protective, and he’d expected her to be more wary. It seemed Cody had crumbled her walls as well. He told her he loved her and hung up the phone before turning back to Cody. “I’m sorry about that. I know that was weird.”

  “It’s okay. They’re really nice. And they’re both gorgeous. It’s easy to see why you look like you do.” When Cody faced him, his eyes were misty. “You’re so lucky. I wish my parents cared that much. Or ever had.”

  Darwin wasn’t sure what to say to that. He shoved the phone into his pocket and took Cody’s hand, which already seemed like second nature. “We can call them if you want.” He forced a laugh. “It couldn’t get any stranger meeting two sets of parents than one.”

  Cody snorted. “Oh yes, it could. With my folks. They barely talk to me when I call, and they for sure don’t want to meet you.” He flinched at his own words. “Sorry. That came out wrong. I didn’t mean it bad against you.”

  “I know that.” Darwin squeezed Cody’s hand. “They aren’t okay with you being gay, huh?”

  Cody glanced down, his gaze seeming to follow the stream. “They don’t know I’m gay.” He looked back up at Darwin quickly, obviously trying to judge his reaction.

  “Oh. Well….” And what a nonreaction it was. Darwin wasn’t sure of the right thing to say.

  “I’ve been thinking about telling them. I’m a state away, you know? What are they going to do?”

  “You think they’d do something? Like come out here?”

  Cody shrugged, swiped his dark bangs out of his eyes, and sat straighter. “Doubt it. They don’t care that much. Probably just yell.”

  Darwin was reminded again of the initial connection he’d felt with Cody. This explained some of that, though this was probably a connection most gay people had, especially those from small Midwest towns. “There was a lot of yelling when I came out too. Well, not from Mom, but a lot from Dad. It got… ugly.” And like that, the bright Colorado sun vanished, and he was fifteen again, devastated that his parents knew his darkest secret. Wanting to be anything other than what he was. Wanting to die.

  “You okay?” Cody placed his free hand on top of their interlocked fingers.

  “Yeah.” Darwin shook his head. “Yeah, I am. Just remembering.” He looked straight at Cody. “I don’t blame you for not wanting to tell your folks, especially after some of the things you’ve told me. I wouldn’t have gotten through it if I hadn’t had help.”

  “Your mom?”

  “No.” Darwin couldn’t hold back his smile at the memory. “A guy named Brooke. He was a youth pastor at my church, kinda. He and his husband moved to town.” He laughed. “Man, I can’t even tell you the drama that caused. They ended up moving away, but he was there long enough to change my life. I wouldn’t have gotten through it without him.” He smiled at Cod
y. “You don’t have to do it by yourself.”

  “I know. I’ve actually talked to Pat about it a couple of times. I’m sure it would end things with my parents. I don’t know why I’m holding on to it. It’s not like there’s anything good between us, anyway.”

  “Cody, you don’t know that. They can learn to accept you as you are. My parents did.”

  Cody laughed, though there was no humor. “No. They can’t. Mine don’t love me like yours. I swear your mom looked at me with more love than I’ve seen in my mom since I was little.”

  “I’m sorry.” Darwin had no idea what to say. He felt useless.

  “Don’t be. Things are better now. I’m where I’ve always dreamed of being.” He shrugged. “No big deal. So do you still talk to that guy?”

  “What guy?”

  “The gay pastor guy.”

  “Brooke?” A sense of calm washed over him at the thought of Brooke. “Yeah. We talk about every month or so still. He’s gone from being my mentor to my friend. An older friend, but still my friend.”

  Cody sounded nervous. “Have you talked to him about me?”

  Now that was an idea. He wondered what Brooke would say about Cody, though he could imagine. “I haven’t. We haven’t talked since I met you.”

  Cody just nodded.

  There was a sadness around him that hadn’t been there before the phone call, but it wasn’t as strong as Darwin feared after talking about the parent crap. He couldn’t help but inspect Cody a bit. It was weird. On the one hand, Cody seemed fragile and insecure. But then, even in a moment like this, talking about such hard things, he was so matter-of-fact about it. Nearly impervious to it.

  Cody caught him staring. “What?”

  “Nothing. Just admiring you.”

  He snorted. “Whatever.” He let go of Darwin’s hand, gesturing the way they’d come. “Wanna go to the snack cart now? Suddenly a sugar rush sounds necessary.”

  “Yeah, it does.” They were halfway through the meadow path, the tall grasses at Darwin’s chest and Cody’s shoulders before Darwin spoke again. “So why Denver?”

  “Hmm?” Cody looked up at him, clearly ripped out of whatever he’d been thinking.

  “Why Denver? I get wanting to leave Kansas, but you could have gone anywhere. Why Denver?”

  “Oh.” Cody smiled, though there was still sadness there. “My folks took us on exactly one vacation when we were kids. We drove to Denver, spent two nights in a hotel. On our one full day, we went to Casa Bonita. Mom and Dad only stayed with us for a little while. I don’t know where they went, but they left us kids there all day.” He smiled, a bright, full smile that made his face even more beautiful than normal. “We had so much fun. Watching the diver and that awesome gorilla. Hiding in the cave. It was the best day of my life.”

  He took Darwin’s hand. Darwin barely caught himself from looking down. It was the first time Cody had touched him first.

  Cody smiled. “I figured if there was anything good for me in the world, it would be in Denver.”

  “WHOA. IT’S even busier than usual.” Cody squeezed through the doorway, then behind the line of people at Mary’s hostess stand, and motioned for Darwin to follow. “Drag Queen Bingo is starting to get as popular as Family Feud.”

  Pat’s smile brightened as she saw them. “Hold on. While I love seeing you, Steven gave you the night off, the second in two weeks, and you come back to work? What the hell is wrong with you?” Her hazel eyes narrowed, and she motioned to Darwin. “Cody, take that boy home and get his clothes off. Don’t waste your time here.”

  “ManDonna texted earlier. Apparently, there’s a new girl doing drag for the first time tonight. She wanted to make sure there were enough people here to be supportive.”

  “Oh, right. Zachary. He’s a sweet thing, bit nervous, but sweet. As you can see, there’s more than enough people here to make his debut a success. You git and have fun.”

  Part of him did feel ridiculous for dragging Darwin back to Mary’s, though he didn’t seem to mind. Cody couldn’t turn ManDonna down. She was part of his family. “We won’t stay long.” When Pat seemed like she was going to argue, Cody pointed to her hair. “I love the blonde.”

  She brightened instantly and patted her short brown hair, then swiped at her bangs. “I just got the highlights today. You think they work?” She lowered her voice, nearly making herself impossible to hear over the music videos and the buzz of the people. “You don’t think it’s a bit much for a woman my age? I don’t want to be that fifty-year-old who’s trying to look sixteen.”

  Darwin leaned closer, his chest touching the back of Cody’s shoulder. Cody instinctively pressed against him. “You’re flawless, Pat. And I love the smoky eye.”

  She grinned and turned back to Cody. “You’re keeping this one. And if you don’t, I’m taking him.” She turned back to the growing line.

  Cody headed toward the bar. “You complimented her makeup. She’ll love you forever.”

  Darwin drew in close to him once more as Cody grabbed a newly vacated stool. “She does have a really good idea.”

  “Highlights? I don’t think your hair could be any more blond.”

  He chuckled. “No, not highlights. The getting naked part.”

  Cody flinched. “Oh.”

  Darwin leaned down and gave him a quick kiss, then moved his lips to Cody’s ear, his breath warm. “I know I’ve been saying we should wait a bit since we’re not just hooking up, but I’m not sure I can wait too much longer.”

  Holy fucking hallelujah. Cody hadn’t been expecting that.

  “That okay?”

  “Oh hell yeah.” Cody peered under the hanging glasses on the far side of the bar at the stage in the other room. “They’re almost done setting up for ManDonna. We could still get out of here before she sees us.”

  Darwin spoke by Cody’s ear once more. “Let’s stay. But be thinking about what you want. How do you want our first time? Me inside you, or would you like to make me yours?”

  Cody pulled back, shocked, and looked in Darwin’s eyes. Was he serious?

  Confusion crossed Darwin’s features. “We don’t have—”

  “Get a room, you two! Fuck.” Vahin smacked the bar top. “Actually. Scrap that. Go ahead and mount each other, but do it up here. That’ll double my tips.”

  Darwin kept his gaze locked on Cody’s for a second longer, then leered at Vahin. “From what I’ve heard about ManDonna, she’d cut me for interrupting her show.”

  Vahin laughed. “Oh, you don’t know her. She’d just sit on your back while you’re fucking and call out numbers.”

  Cody checked out of their conversation, knowing their back and forth would last for a bit. Darwin really seemed to have become genuine friends with most of the staff.

  He seemed to fit naturally in every aspect of Cody’s world. Not that his life was all that complex, he knew, but still. The past couple of weeks had shown him an existence he’d never actually dared to hope for. Darwin was kind and patient. Almost too patient. Cody hadn’t wanted to wait on sex—that had been all Darwin. Cody figured they’d already been in bed together, swallowed each other’s loads, what difference could it make? However, he had to admit there’d been a sweet, agonizing ecstasy to their wait. And he’d learned a whole new appreciation for making out in the car. Two nights in a row, as Darwin had dropped Cody off in front of his apartment, which Cody still wasn’t ready for Darwin to see, they’d spent an hour making out in the front seat, Darwin rolling the driver’s seat all the way back and Cody straddling his lap. They might have kept their jeans on, but Cody had no doubts about Darwin’s ability to keep a pleasurable thrusting motion for as long as was needed.

  He wasn’t sure what the change was, why Darwin had decided that tonight could be the night, but Cody was ready. More ready than he’d been for anything before. Though he wasn’t sure how it would go, what Darwin really wanted. Cody had never been the top. He was the little guy. Men always assumed the dominant rol
e over him. He’d never even thought about switching roles, with Darwin or anyone else. Though the idea was….

  “Holy bejesus, we’ve got a hot crowd in here tonight!” ManDonna’s voice cut through Cody’s thoughts, as well as everything else in the space. “Y’all are gonna be glad you showed. Not only do we have our normal Mary’s Merch prizes, but we’ve got….” She lifted her vibrant pink-tipped fingers to shield her eyes as she searched the crowd. “Where are you, Hershel?”

  A tall older African-American man stood up from one of the tables in the far corner.

  Cody leaned back toward Darwin, “That’s ManDonna’s husband.”

  He started to explain more, but ManDonna’s volume increased when she found Hershel in the crowd. “Well, bring our main prize up here, baby.”

  Hershel made his way through the crowd, looking rather uncomfortable. He handed something large and purple to ManDonna. She grabbed his shoulder before he could leave the stage and held up the prize.

  Cody heard Darwin suck in a breath, then felt its warmth at his ear. “If you decide to take the top role tonight, we are not using that thing.”

  ManDonna shook the gigantic dildo at the crowd. “That’s right, ladies. Win my game and you’ll feel accomplished deep inside.” She smacked her husband on his ass. “Now get off my stage, baby. You’re stealing the spotlight.” ManDonna refocused on the crowd. “Unfortunately I couldn’t find one as… girthy… as my man’s, but this old thing will have to do.”

  The crowd let out a volley of cheers and catcalls.

  ManDonna started to speak but then looked down at one of the close tables, distracted by one of the diners. The batting of her ridiculously long false eyelashes was visible from where Cody and Darwin sat at the bar. “Did you just call me loose?”

  There was a reply from the table that Cody couldn’t hear.