Sinful Biker

by Terri Lane

  I needed answers, my mind knew that, but what my body wanted was something wholly different, and right now it was my body in charge. My lips pursed up towards him, my feet automatically went onto their tiptoes, remembering just how much taller he always was than me, and my heart pulsated noisily for him.

  Adam cocked his head curiously at me, before his fingers snaked up to my cheeks once more. In a weird way, this was almost an exact replication of our first ever kiss, and the nostalgia of that was almost too much to bear. This wasn’t some stranger, some unattainable man, this was the only person I’d ever loved, and being back with him felt far more right than I ever knew it could.

  And then his lips were on mine, only this time there was no tenderness, only passion. He was claiming me, consuming me, and I was happily jumping into the abyss giving him everything. Adam Martin was the only person I ever really wanted to kiss, and here I was getting just that once more.

  *

  21st July 2006

  “Can you believe it?” I gasped as my hand swung casually in my boyfriends. “We’re finishing school today!”

  He kissed me lightly in front of everyone—a fact that was only still a novelty to me. Everyone was so used to us as a couple now, no one batted an eyelash. It had been well over a month, which was like a lifetime in school terms. Even Tiana didn’t bother to flirt with him as much anymore... although she did continue to be bitchy about me, just about loud enough for me to hear. Not that it ever bothered me... not really.

  “I know, right? And Tiana’s party tonight is going to be epic. Everyone will be there!”

  “Urgh, we don’t have to go, do we? Or at least, I don’t.” I really didn’t like the idea of hanging out with my arch enemy. I had the horrible feeling that this was all a plot to humiliate me in some way. Some sort of Carrie bullshit.

  “What? Are you insane?” He chuckled, actually believing that I’d gone mad. “We have to go, everyone is going, even Sara. You’ll have a great time, I promise.”

  I didn’t answer him, I simply pursed my lips instead. I really didn’t want to go anywhere near her home, but I had the sinking feeling that I wasn’t about to get away with it. Plus, it would probably be worse for Adam to go alone anyway. He was better now, not acting so playboy-like, but my insecurities sometimes made it utterly unbearable.

  “Yeah, alright,” I finally gasped out defeated. “We’ll see.”

  I glanced over to where I could see my best friend hunched over a text book, wondering how this distance had managed to be created between us. We were once so close, but somewhere along the line I’d let her drift away a bit. I guess I got lost in the joy of my fantasy becoming real. Maybe the party would be a good place for me to restart my friendship. We’d drift apart when we left this town to go to college, but it didn’t have to start so early.

  To survive the party I would just have to ensure that I looked incredible, too good for anyone to know that Adam was way too good for me. If I focused on clothes rather than the actual idea of being in Tiana’s home, then it wouldn’t totally ruin the last day of this chapter of my life.

  “So, when we both get to Texas, how often are you going to come and see me?”

  “Every weekend.” I nudged Adam with my hip. “You’re gonna get sick of me in the end.”

  I did feel really bad that I’d changed my college plans to be nearer to Adam, when I wouldn’t for Sara, but she would understand... I hoped. I hadn’t yet worked up the courage to tell her, which really answered the question for me.

  God, I was such a bitch. I needed to make things right. I yearned to go over and speak to her, but school didn’t feel like the time or place for that. I wasn’t geared up for a scene here.

  “Oh I doubt that, knowing that I’ll get to see your beautiful face will be enough to get me through each week! I’m going to love it. I just hope the colleges are as close together as you say they are.”

  “Hmm?” Adam brought me away from my current problems and had me daydreaming about the future once more. I loved thinking about it, it really did feel like it was going to be incredible.

  Our future looked so bright, it was so solid that I couldn’t wait for it. I’d been looking forward to escaping the person I was in school, but now all I wanted was to still be her. She wasn’t so bad, not with Adam by my side.

  "Don’t you worry about that, everything will be fine.”

  And I honestly believed in that moment that I had everything figured out.

  Maybe the party wouldn’t be so bad after all, maybe it would be nice to say goodbye to all of this in a nice way. Sure, it hadn’t all been great, but I was leaving on a high and that deserved to be celebrated after all. At least I was finishing this as Adam Martin’s girlfriend.

  *

  20th September 2016

  Oh my God, what the hell was I doing? And why did it have to feel so good? Maybe if we’d kissed, and the spark was no longer there, then everything could settle back to normal...

  But no, every part of me was lit up in an intoxicating fire. The powerful electricity was heating up my veins, the pulsating need in my underwear was screaming so loudly I couldn’t ignore it any longer, and the further Adam’s lips worked down my neck, the crazier I became.

  “Holy hell,” I muttered quietly as I felt those wonderful fingers snaking around my waist. My heart bulldozed, the desperation in the pit of my stomach needed him to explore me further. Anyone could walk in on us at any given moment, but I wasn’t even considering that. The power of my craving was far too intense.

  Adam walked me backwards until my butt hit the dressing table, and I gratefully caved into it, glad to have something solid to stop me from falling over. This was unexpected, probably not the right move for this moment, but I simply couldn’t stop myself.

  I wrapped my legs around Adam’s waist and yanked him closer to me, kissing him hard and fast. His hands were trailing up and down my legs, mine were knotting up in his hair, I couldn’t quite tell where he ended and I began, which was how it was always supposed to be.

  After a few moments, Adam pulled away and he dropped to his knees, which stunned me. I flickered my gaze down to him, shock rendering me speechless, which only caused him to smirk back at me. There was no control anymore, he had every bit of it, and I couldn’t care less. I didn’t want it, if it meant I couldn’t get to experience any of this.

  Adam slid his mouth up my thighs, flicking his tongue all over me as he went, which caused me to toss my head back in sheer ecstasy. My knuckles had such tight grip of the dresser that I was certain they’d gone white.

  “Oh my God, fuck, Adam,” I cried out, probably a little too loudly for a secret rendezvous.

  My back arched, my pulsating, hot, wet desire slid nearer to him as he teased the outline of my very simple, boring cotton panties. I didn’t have many things with me while I stayed in the hotel, I was coping with the most basic of underwear, but with Adam touching it, it felt like the sexiest damn thing on the planet.

  His fingers traced over the material, boiling my blood over, I couldn’t stand it anymore, my heart was thundering, I was physically shuddering, I could hardly breathe. It was too much.

  “You want this, don’t you?” Adam hissed smugly into my ear. “You want me.”

  “Yes,” I panted, moving my hands upwards to dig my nails into his shoulders. “Yes, I do.”

  “Beg for it,” he commanded. His tone was very different from the Adam that I was used to, but I liked it. It turned me on, it reminded me that he was my boss now, and that this was incredibly taboo.

  “Please. Please, I need this.”

  He rewarded my compliance by ripping my panties clean off. I could feel his breath on my entrance, the cool whispers sending me even more insane.

  “Oh my God, more.”

  He slowly, tantalizingly ran his fingers up and down my slit.

  “More, fuck, Adam!”

  With that, he could sense that the desperation was getting too much, so thankfull
y he drove his fingers hard into me, causing an involuntary moan to burst past my lips. His hands felt incredible inside of me, he was sending me far too close to the knife edge of desire, I felt too close to losing it.

  Then, just as I was about to scream, his fingers whipped away and his mouth claimed me instead. And wow... his tongue drawing patterns over my clit was too much for my heart to handle. My heart screamed, my body buckled, I’d lost every bit of myself.

  “Fuck... me...” I gasped, needing everything from him. “Now.”

  Adam stepped backwards as he stood up, making a big show of dropping his trousers and underwear for me. What lay underneath caused my breath to get stuck in my throat. He was huge... much bigger than I’d been expecting, reminding me of just how adult this now was. We were too young for this when we were dating in school, we never got the chance for this. I’d had a couple of very boring flings since, but I’d never been made to feel like this. It was completely brand new to me.

  I opened and closed my mouth a few times, because I didn’t really have anything to say. Then as he stepped closer to me, that brave, sex goddess that he’d turned me into took over once more and I yanked him so close to me that I could feel his length teasing my entrance. The powerful need was growing, desperation was intensifying, so when he finally slid into me I almost couldn’t take it.

  The first thrust made me yell, a guttural violent sound that came from so deep within me it was uncontrollable. Adam felt incredible, he filled me up in the most amazing way, leaving me panting and breathless.

  Because of how I was sitting on the edge of the dresser, every thrust of Adam’s cock brushed past my clit, pushing me over the edge into the deep pool of bliss. I was so hot, practically bubbling over, and it was all about Adam.

  As the most powerful orgasm known to man shattered through my system, I clung to Adam as if he was the only solid person on the planet. He was the only one pinning me down, stopping me from floating away, yet it was him who had the bliss pooling through me.

  I’d never gotten over Adam, it was clear to me now. The memories still hung about in the forefront of my mind, the feelings meant I couldn’t quite move on my life, that no one could measure up.

  I still loved him.

  I never stopped.

  *

  21st July 2006

  This party was a bust, I should have stuck to my instincts and stayed well away. Sara was nowhere to be found, there was no magical friendship fix happening here, I wasn’t even sure she was at the damn party at all, and Adam had been stuck talking to Tiana for what felt like forever leaving me totally alone.

  Well, maybe stuck wasn’t the word. He didn’t look like he was complaining. He was laughing at her jokes as if she was the damn funniest person alive.

  As if I didn’t exist.

  “Drink?” someone I barely recognized from my class asked.

  “Sure.” I hadn’t planned on having any of the awful brown looking liquid that was doing the rounds, but I needed to get through this somehow. I was the only one not in a lovely, celebratory mood. Right now I didn’t feel like I had anything to look forward to.

  Was this jealousy going to be my life now? It was bad enough seeing Adam flirting in front of me. How would it feel knowing that he was in a whole college full of gorgeous girls, knowing I could only spend a certain amount of time with him? All of a sudden my future didn’t appear as bright as it once had. I’d been looking at it through rose tinted glasses, but now all of that fell away.

  I slugged the liquid back, despising the way my throat burned as it made its way down. I didn’t think I was going to make a very good drinker, especially not with my head already spinning. The dizziness consuming my brain made everything I was looking at that much harder to stomach.

  I grabbed my cell phone out of my pocket and put in a call to my friend, but the endless ringing just made my heart sink into my shoes. Where the hell was Sara? Couldn’t she sense that I needed her? Okay, so maybe I hadn’t been the best person in the world recently, but still...

  I needed to go home. Being here, in the back yard of the girl I despised, without my best friend, watching the guy I thought felt the same way about me all over someone else... this was hell. It would’ve been hard to stay at home, not knowing what was going on, but actually knowing wasn’t much better. The intense alcohol was only sending my black mood spiraling, I felt like I needed to get out before I did something stupid.

  I spun on my heels, staggering slightly as the booze settled in my tummy, and I moved away from the crowd. Frustrated tears stung my eyes as I recalled the small beam of excitement I felt as I picked out my favorite black, figure hugging dress this evening. I wasn’t looking forward to Tiana, but I was happy to spend time with Adam... how naïve I was. The curls fell out of my hair, and my makeup ran down my cheeks and I didn’t even care anymore.

  This was the worst night of my life. What did it matter how I looked? I was stupid to assume that it’d make a damn bit of difference.

  “Hey!” Adam’s voice ringing out from behind me was the only thing that could persuade me to stop dead in my tracks. As hurt as I was, I still adored everything about him. I still wanted him by my side... and since he’d brought me here in his car, he was my ride home, so I didn’t have much choice. “Where are you going?”

  “Home,” I shot back glumly, refusing to turn and look at him. “I didn’t think you’d notice, since you’ve had no time for me tonight.”

  “Oh, don’t be like that.” He wrapped his arms around my back and pressed his face into my hair. “You know I only want to be with you, I just got stuck talking.”

  “Only to Tiana, though.” I sounded petty and I knew it, but I couldn’t seem to stop myself.

  “She’s my friend, we’ve been friends since junior high.” He honestly couldn’t seem to see the problem, which unfortunately left it riding on my shoulders. Was I in the wrong here? If Sara had attended the party, would I have even noticed?

  Probably!

  “Okay, well why don’t you stay with your friend then? I’ll call a cab. I’m not in the partying mood anymore.”

  Adam wanted to stay, I could sense it, and actually I wouldn’t have minded too much if he did. Maybe I would’ve been mad that he picked the others over me, but this was our last blowout until graduation. I was old enough to understand what that meant, I fully understood that our lives were about to turn on their heads forever.

  “I’ll take you home.” The less annoyed he sounded, the guiltier I felt.

  “No, I’m the one who wants to go, please, you stay.” I turned to face him and kissed him lightly on the lips. “I’ll be just fine, I will message you when I get home.”

  He tugged his car keys out of his pocket and jangled them at me. “I’m taking you, you’re the most important person to me. I can see everyone else over the summer anyway.” Of course, he wasn’t on a scholarship, he didn’t need a job. Sometimes I forgot how different we were. “So come on, we can lie under the stars and talk about how much we love each other.”

  How was I supposed to resist such a sweet offer, I was only human after all? A beaming smile burst across my lips as I allowed Adam to lace his fingers through mine. I knew it was bad of me, to rest all my happiness on one person, but when he made me feel so special it was very challenging not to.

  Adam Martin was everything to me, and I couldn’t see any universe where that wouldn’t be the case. I was his, and he was mine, what more could we possibly want?

  *

  20th September 2016

  As soon as the post orgasmic bliss subsided, another, colder feeling settled in instead. I fixed my eyes firmly on the ground, scanning desperately to find my underwear. I couldn’t look at Adam anymore, not now. Not after what we’d just done.

  What the hell was I thinking?

  Why did I have to succumb to temptation? I’d already decided that nothing was ever going to happen until I found out the absolute truth about what’d gone on back then, but I
caved anyway. Like an idiot. And now I was going to have to face the awkwardness of rejection, in my workplace. This hotel was the one thing I had going for me, and now I’d wrecked that. And what for? One moment of fun?

  The heat of my body was replaced with an icy guilt, one that flew through my veins and almost froze me over completely. This was awful, I desperately needed a hole to open up in the ground, to swallow me whole.

  “Jenna?”

  Shit, Deana’s voice was angrily bursting through my radio, shaking me from my shock. How long had she been trying to get through to me? She’d fire me for sure... although maybe that wouldn’t be the worst thing anymore. Maybe that was what I needed to escape the rut I was in.

  “He... hello,” I stammered into the receiver, utterly unable to keep the fear from my voice. “Hi, Deana, is everything okay?”

  “Where the fuck are you? Have you sorted this lock yet?”

  I glanced towards Adam, but it appeared that he was doing his best to avoid me, just as I was him. Knowing that he didn’t want to discuss it sent a horrifying sickness swirling around inside of me. It was one thing for me to know it shouldn’t have happened, it was quite another for him to feel that way.

  “Erm, yeah, I think Hank might need to take a look later on, but for now it seems fine.”

  Don’t come up here, do not come up here. The last thing I needed was for Deana to catch me and the new hotel owner in varying states of undress.

  “Okay,” she sighed deeply, giving me a much needed moment to breathe. “Well, get back to work then.”

  “Is she always so cold with you?” Adam asked, with a similar iciness to his tone. “She needs to speak to her staff better.”

  Really? That’s where we were? Okay... seemed like a damn great avoidance tactic. Where was all the sweet talk now? He was as far away from me as possible, and that was so much worse. I actually preferred being confused by him.