Rebirth

by Valerie Willis

  “You bastard,” Hotan growled as he continued holding the frosty Shellie, his love, in his arms. “I will do more than hold up my end of this bargain.”

  Hotan was burning up inside between his gushing wound and fury. Geliah had pushed him too far and will pay for his crimes. Geliah has spent years terrorizing the others and who knows how many innocents like Shellie. Only one person was strong enough to take him out and that was him, if only he had his powers or at least knew what they were. He can end this if he could just grasp what to do.

  I want to put an end to this. He’s hurt everyone that I care about and I need to end it. I will make sure I end this.

  As his emotions washed over him and played out those last seconds over and over, the blood he sat in began to steam. The smell of copper and iron began to fill the large cathedral. Geliah watched, aroused as the blood began to boil and glow blue. He had done it; he had awakened his powers and a fight worth fighting was upon them. Laughter from Geliah filled the room, as he grew more excited seeing he had struck a nerve.

  He kissed her icy lips and laid her softly on the floor as he raised himself onto his feet, steam swirling about him. Blood still dripped from the gaping gash in his stomach as he clinched his fist at his sides. The glowing blue grew larger until it seemed as if he was on fire with large flames whipping towards the ceiling. Black marks crawled and veined across his skin as he looked up at Geliah with insufferable hatred. He had paid a horrible price to gain access to these powers and he was going to make sure that Geliah felt the full extent of his abilities.

  I will do her right.

  “Well that’s a pretty light show, don’t you think?” Cassie whistled as she shot a glance at Callan who remained silent. “You never say much do you?”

  “You’ve all made a grave mistake.” Callan’s dark eyes glared at her, his pale gaunt face baring a mournful look. “You two will pay for what you’ve done here tonight. I will not pity you for the punishment that boy will give you. There will be no mourning the loss of you or Geliah. You have tortured us all long enough.”

  “Now that’s the kind of powers I’m talking about!” Geliah spun around laughing up into the ceiling above. “Now I’m going to have a fight. I love it when a plan works like clockwork!”

  “I’ll make short work of this Geliah.” Hotan could feel the power surging through him, almost like a whisper telling him all the secrets he had been trying to find. They were flooding all the empty spaces within him. “I promise you that.”

  “I doubt it.” Geliah raised his crimson colored sword that was still wearing Shellie’s blood, pointing it at him. “You don’t have a chance, I’m afraid.”

  Despite the swiftness of Geliah’s strike it all appeared slow to Hotan. He was no longer on the same playing field; he was beyond it. The sword came quick and hard as Geliah sent a slicing cut towards his head. Hotan’s body felt as if it was reacting on its own accord. He casually reached up and caught the blade with his bare hand and watched as the sword rusted, crumbling from the touch. It was almost as if he had aged the material in fast forward. Geliah’s eyes went wide as he paled. Behind him, he could hear Cassie crying out and her heels were cracking across the marble like thunder as she ran towards them. Hotan grabbed Geliah’s throat as he stared him in the eyes, drinking up the fear he saw. He had come into his powers much further than anyone could have predicted.

  “But, but how.” Geliah stared as his lips failed him.

  “This will be your punishment.” Hotan grinned wildly at Geliah returning all those tortured moments. “You thought you had it bad before. This will be the appropriate retribution for the crimes you have committed against your own kind, and more importantly, taking her life. Enjoy your trip to Hell.”

  A scream of pain echoed throughout the church as Cassie pinged off the wall of blue flames. They had created a barrier around the two of them. She was going to be the next on his list after he finished with her lover. He gripped Geliah’s throat tighter cutting the air from him. An explosion of blue fire, accompanied with a deafening sound of something imploding. It was an overwhelming sound similar to air being sucked into a vacuum. He let go, allowing Geliah to fall limp on the ground. He towered over him, as the only sound was that of Cassie’s hysterical crying. It had been done.

  “I refuse to lower myself to your level. I’m no monster.” Hotan let out a disheartened sigh, almost regretting that he couldn’t return the act of taking a life. “But this should be a fair enough purgatory for you.”

  “You killed him!” Cassie crawled over to Geliah as the flames absorbed back into Hotan. “Geliah! Geliah!”

  I’m so sorry. Callan’s shaken words did nothing to ease what had happened. I couldn’t do anything, I was too weak and I-

  Geliah suddenly took in a gasp of air, desperate to refill his lungs. He began to cough and hack as he struggled to sit up. Pushing Cassie from him, trying to recall what had just happened. Enraged by the thought that he had been defeated by a boy, so flawlessly. Geliah gasped for air for several minutes, continuing to push Cassie to the side as she frantically tried to aid him.

  Hotan looked over at Callan who was undoing the bindings on Jake and Talib. At least his assumptions about Callan were right. He had no intentions of aggression. He had fallen victim to Geliah and Cassandra’s games and had no way of getting himself out. Callan had simply done as his Element would have done. Flowed like water and simply rode the current out to peaceful waters. They exchanged reassuring nods before he returned his glance to Geliah. Geliah wobbled weakly onto his feet.

  “What did you do to me?” Geliah glowered at him as he struggled to stand. “What the hell did you do!”

  “I did what should have been done a long time ago. You no longer have any power.” Hotan’s mournful stare gave pity onto Geliah. “And you’re now truly a mortal. You are no different from all those you’ve ever tortured or killed over your long years. I recommend you use your time wisely. It’s going to be your last before the Devil himself drags you to hell.”

  “Damn you!” Geliah’s balance faltered, falling to his knees and banging his fist into the marble floor. “I’d rather be dead! Just be a man and kill me!”

  “I am glad to see you will not enjoy your time-” Cassie started pounding her fist against Hotan’s chest, her mascara streaming down her face as she continued to cry. “Oh yes. I almost forgot.”

  Grabbing her by the wrists, Hotan looked her in the eyes. She froze as she looked at him, shivering in his grip as tears fell. Just as before, a loud sucking sound consumed the cathedral. Her eyes rolled back into her head and he let her go. She fell with a thud next to Geliah, who was still submerged in his own self-pity. He neglected to even spare a moment’s glance in her direction as he spat curse after curse at Hotan, howling like a mad man. Geliah was too weak as he continued to fail to stay standing.

  “What a shame that you throw her love for you to the side.” Hotan felt sympathy for Cassie as he walked away, hearing her gasping and coughing on the floor behind him. “How horrible for her.”

  Hotan allowed himself to fall to his knees next to Shellie. All he could do was stare at her lifeless body as it lay cold and empty. She was gone. His hand reached out and closed her eyelids. It hurt to see her so dead and barren. He wasn’t sure how much time had passed when Talib and Jacob managed to wake up and approach the blood bath that lay around him. They gasped as they came closer to him. There was no way for him to rip his eyes from her lifeless body. That was his entire world laying there on that cold, hard floor in front of him. Alone.

  “Hotan,” Jacob’s voice was low and stunned as he knelt on the other side of her body. “She’s gone. We need to get you out of here. I wish I were able to stop it. I tried and I let you down. I’m so sorry.”

  “I let you down.” Wobbling, Talib leaned on a nearby pew. “I let my guard down. I did not want it to end this way. It should have never gone this way. Hotan, Hotan you need to leave.”

  Tears poured d
own Hotan’s cheeks as he listened in silence. They all had tried so hard to stop this from happening. It was out of everyone’s control. No one was able to prevent, let alone predict the outcome. His anger had receded when he was content that he gave Geliah a fitting punishment. He hated being a mortal more than death itself. It was all he could think of. His stomach, heart and soul, wouldn’t allow him to take another person’s life. It would have been an easy out for Geliah if he had killed him. He wanted him to suffer. It was only fair.

  “What should we do?” Jacob’s purple eyes were watery with despair as he looked over at Talib. “He’s in shock. I hate to move him, but the police are bound to be on their way. I can only do so much explaining.”

  “Saphellia is on her way.” Sitting on the pew, Talib placed his face in his hands. “She will take him to my place. I will stick around and use my power to help smooth this over.”

  “I can bring her back.” Hotan managed the words, choking on the tightness in his throat. Whispers were murmuring all the dark secrets of the element of Rebirth to him. “I could bring her back. I know how.”

  “What?” Talib looked up at him, watching him kneeling beside her. The look on his face showed the years of fear dancing in his eyes. “Bring her back?”

  “I have the power to bring her back.” Breaking his stare from her body, he looked Talib in the eyes. “But it wouldn’t be her, anymore. It wouldn’t be her at all.”

  “What do you mean?” Jacob shuddered as he caught a glance of the wound still dripping blood in his abdomen. “We need to get you to the hospital, Hotan.”

  “It wouldn’t be her, anymore.” Hotan muttered over and over. He was cold, tired and broken.

  “You can resurrect the dead.” Stumbling to his feet, Talib worked his way over to him, laying a heavy hand on his shoulder. “You can bring her back?”

  “No, not her.” Hotan allowed his head to fall on Talib’s shoulder as he murmured on. “It would be another person, a look alike, a fake. Shellie would still be gone. She has left. It only works if they are still there and she left so fast…”

  “Hotan,” Tears slid down Jake’s cheeks as he came over to help Talib pull him to his feet. They urgently increased the distance between him and Shellie’s body. “I am so sorry. I, dear God, I hate that you are, I’m sorry I was too dumb to figure this out in time.”

  “It would be Shellie without her soul, another soul.” Mumbling was the only thing Hotan could manage as they ushered him out the door and towards the car that awaited outside. “Shellie is gone. I’ve lost her. I failed her. Alone, I am all alone.”

  “Jesus,” Saphellia’s face drained of color as she watched as they practically dragged him, soaked with blood, dripping steadily as they continued. “Is he going to make it?”

  “I, I don’t know.” Jake looked at her, both thinking that he was too badly injured to make it even to the hospital. “He was wounded before I even came to, and that was quite a while ago.”

  “Let’s get him in the car quick.” She jerked the backseat door open and rushed to pick up his feet to speed the process along. “Please don’t die on me kid. We’ve only just met!”

  They dragged Hotan into the backseat. It was getting harder to breath; his body was numb and cold. He could feel the pain there, but he didn’t care to give it any attention. It was the only feeling he had left that made him feel alive on the inside. Watching as they exchanged words, he had stopped listening a long time ago. All he wanted to do was to close his eyes and fade away.

  Just let go.

  “Hotan!” Talib was yelling again, and he had him by the jaw. It was hurting him as he cracked his eyes open to see why he was disturbing him. “Heal yourself! I know you can do it. Dammit, heal yourself!”

  “Why?” Closing his eyes Hotan began to feel annoyed at the interruption. “I don’t want to. I’m dead.”

  “I said to heal yourself.” Heat came crawling into him, but he hadn’t any will left to fight it. “I’ll make you if I have to. You hear me, Hotan. I will make you live!”

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  It was dark and musky smelling in the apartment. Hotan allowed it to go unattended as he spent most of his day on the couch or on the mattress. Light from the window in the living room had bothered him so he took another band poster and covered it. Nothing seemed bright or warm anymore. There was just the hurt from the gaping hole where Shellie used to be. His worse fear had happened. No one even had a chance to stop it. He thought a public space was sufficient enough to discourage Geliah, but that had been a foolish comfort. He should have been by her side.

  Geliah and Cassandra both were rotting in a mental institute for a long list of crimes, including the murder of Shellie. He couldn’t help but regret not taking their lives, but once more, he knew deep down it wouldn’t have satisfied the pain he felt. In the end, there would have been a severe recoil for him to use such an action. Many of his friends had come and went, trying to take care of him or cheer him up at the least. There were so many questions and feelings overtaking him that all he could do is just sit there. Letting them wash over him and drown him again and again.

  There was no denying he had come into his immortality. He had come aware of his abilities and the curse of the element of Rebirth. He no longer needed to eat or anything that would qualify as a normal human function. All that remained was the body that imprisoned him there in that tiny apartment. It was clear that Hotan had every right to fear his own abilities. He was practically a God, but it did him no good. It wasn’t enough to save Shellie or even bring her back. He was all alone in the world.

  Why did I let Talib force me to heal himself?

  He could have left with her that night. Instead, he had allowed him to access his abilities and use it to heal him in a flash of blue.

  Laying there on the mattress, staring endlessly at the ceiling, he rubbed his abdomen. A tiny thin scar remained where he had been torn open by Geliah’s blade. There may have been barely any signs of his wound, but he wouldn’t forget the pain that it had induced. Time had passed, he had no idea how many months had come and gone in his sulking. He felt broken.

  He had managed to attend her funeral, where he had taken his acoustic guitar and sung Seether’s Broken in tribute. It was the only song that expressed how he felt about losing her. Never again will he see those green eyes. He didn’t feel right now that she was gone. It was hard seeing her parent’s faces that day.

  Do they blame me for not being able to protect her? No, they had no idea I was even there…

  Sighing, he rolled to his side, his eyes falling onto a gray cat with yellow eyes sitting there watching him. She had shown up immediately after Shellie’s death, but he hadn’t the drive to figure out if it was really Abigail. He assumed it was, but she hadn’t spoken a word to him. In fact, he hadn’t even heard her signature giggle. He slowly sat up, careful not to break his stare with her. There was something stirring deep in him and he couldn’t ignore it. He had made a promise and he intended to keep it.

  “Abigail, I intend to keep my promise to you.” The cat simply tilted its head at him, flicking its tail back and forth. “I am sorry for neglecting to do as promised and not getting to it sooner.”

  “You’ve lost your love. It hurts so much to see you so sad.” She came closer nudging her feline head on his leg. “I am so sorry.”

  “There was nothing any of us could do.” Shuddering he attempted to shake the wave of sorrow from him, he was tired of the feeling. It was bringing him no comfort. “Shellie would want me to move on. To continue to move forward in order to honor her leaving this world. How long have I allowed myself to rot here in my own torment and regret?”

  “I don’t think you want to know that.” Changing into her true form, as the dark haired little girl, she sat next to him, her head leaning on his shoulder. “You have been here like this for a very long time.”

  “Several months I suppose.” Rubbing his face he couldn’t help but feel dirty and grimy.
“A good 6 months? Tops?”

  “Longer.” He could barely hear her. “Over a year.”

  “A year,” Nausea waved over him to think that he had allowed himself to grieve in filth for that long.

  I’ve grieved for over a year. Not eating, not living, just tormenting myself in my own private purgatory. I’ve punished myself enough for what happened…

  “I can’t sit here like this. It does no one any good. It does nothing for me, nothing for her.” The weight of his shame made his shoulders ache.

  “Hotan, I am so sorry.” Abigail sniffled, rubbing tears away from her cheeks with her fist. “I was too scared to help…”

  “I have been sorry for far too long.” Jerking up he headed for the shower. “I need to clean up my act. The old Hotan made this mistake, I will not follow his path of destruction. I refuse to repeat history.”

  Hotan could feel the grime of his lament wash off his skin, allowing it to be swallowed down the drain.

  This is horrible.

  He should have never let himself waste away for this long. Shellie would have disapproved about him doing this for a few months, but over a year was beyond mourning her lose. He didn’t allow himself to grieve this long for his mother, and there was no reason for it now. It was only right to honor losing a life by living your life to the fullest. Anything other than that was disrespectful.

  His skin felt fresh and he was feeling better. Shutting the shower off, he leaned his head against the shower wall, taking in deep breaths. He needed to start making plans to set himself up. He was immortal, but now was the time to take care of unfinished business. If he had goals to make, this was his only moment in the never ending life to do them as himself and not the mysterious undying entity.

  Finally he was thinking outside of the black pool of heartache. With a towel around his waist, he walked out of the bathroom, drying his hair with second one. Abigail’s cheeks were red and looking away as he sat on the couch. The poor girl was stuck in a state of being a child, yearning to be an adult, fighting to be herself all this time. There was nothing intimate or personal about having to change yourself to do things you wanted to experience. This obviously weighed on her heart heavily. His sorrow shifted for her at that moment.